In My Childish Fears
by ThePhantomsFlutist
Summary: Leroux/Kaybased elements dark/modern. Another spin on the tale. Christine is an orphan, looking for a new place to call home when a mysterious applicant takes her in. Astounded by the strange beauty she doesn't realize his intentions until it's too late.
1. New Guardian

_Dear readers, _

For lovers of my last story, Eternal Music I was recently inspired to write another phanfic after about... what? Six, seven months? Wow, it's been a while. Anyway, I recently saw a play that was a version of the Leroux novel, and I was suddenly inspired by: A.) a conversation about the dinner table with my friend's family, b.) a dream (like usual), and c.) just adoration for the darker Erik! and d.) all the phanfiction I've read. I also read Susan Kay's _Phantom_ and I absolutely adored it! I just really couldn't wrap my head around Erik being all with the morphine... it kind of disturbed me, and then the ending was sad (sobbed for a few hours), but I wish it stuck more to the book there... The writing was excellent and inspiring once more, and now taking a break from my vampire novel, I now give you this novel which I am determined to finish by the end of the summer (yaayyy). The title might just be crappy and I'm thinking about changing it, but I really hope to stay with this and hope some people may read this.

I respect reviewers who actually _review_ instead of complimenting... I mean, that's all great and stuff except I would much rather you give some advice and comment about my story with fruitful information, and if you do, you have my respect!

Now, without further ado, I present to you, In My Childish Fears

**Disclaimer for entire story: **Duuhh... I don't own Phantom, if you don't wanna count the 2-disc DVD of Phantom, two music boxes, two different versions of the book, the original cast soundtrack, four tickets to the show, three t-shirts, and Susan Kay's novel... If I could that'd be awesome, except there's a reason why it's called "Phanfiction" so there's no point to this anyway.

_

* * *

__Chapter 1:_

_New Guardian_

"You've got to be kidding me," Mrs. Giry huffed, crossing her arms across her chest, glaring at me coldly. I didn't have anything to begin to contradict at the moment, and I stared back at her with the same amount of coldness she was giving me. "How can you even _begin_ to know the family if you've only been with them for three months?" She threw out her arms dramatically, huffing deeply.

"It doesn't take long." I replied quietly, bending my head to look at my hands, not wanting to look at the woman huffing around the room just because she had more work to do. Dealing with her anger problem for the past few years, I just had to ignore it gradually.

"You know, Christine, if you don't stay with this family, you only have one more chance until I give you away to the foster home. You can't just move around on a whim like this!" She exclaimed, lowering her eyes so that they were at the same level. I grimaced.

She softened her expression suddenly, and then placed a hand under my chin to lift it up.

"You will never be able to find the perfect parents, Christine, no matter where you move, you should know it will never be the same. You must grow to love people as they are, and take it in."

"I know," I whispered brokenly, trying hard to save my crying for tonight in the new house. During these times of moving about the east coast, Mrs. Giry acts as a mother, taking care of me dearly until I arrived at the next home. I sometimes wondered if she would take me in because I've known her and her daughter, Meg, for so long, and if I couldn't just move in there with them. After my father passed away, Meg became my best friend that I contacted with the old cell phone I found somewhere that was out of someone else's reach, and I simply found the right charger for it, and now I use it all the time. I don't even pay the bill mysteriously enough, but I text Meg a lot.

"Then what was wrong with this last family? Hm?" She asked softly, rubbing her thumb against my cheek.

"They had _eight_ kids." I replied reluctantly, "_Eight_ of them... I don't think they even knew my name until the last day when I called you."

Mrs. Giry rolled her eyes at me, and fixed her posture. "Well this next sponsor doesn't have any kids," She replied as she began to go through files, "I believe he is a very willing applicant, and would take you in almost immediately."

"That last part... the exact same words as the last five houses, Mrs. Giry." I murmured nonchalantly.

"Dear, you'll be fine here... I know it. It's a single man who just wants some company and you seemed fit."

I sighed and got up from the kitchen chair, "I'll get my things."

She smiled contentedly, and walked behind me to the hallway as she retrieved her keys and bent down to grab my other lighter bag filled with the few books I'm allowed to bring along. The bag I held carried the few outfits that I carry as well, stolen from each house I've been to.

It seemed God didn't want me to go, either, for it began to pour down rain, crashing on the car, and it didn't take time until I realized it was pouring hail. I suppose I should count this as a bad omen, that I'm doomed to wonder the halls of some foster home like a ghost along with all the other rejects and mope around enough that nobody would ever want to adopt me. I've been very convinced that God actually doesn't want me anywhere, that since my father and my other caretaker, Mrs. Valerius died, I don't exist anymore... I'm just skin and bones.

It seemed like forever and a day driving in the car, though the rain never ceased to stop pouring down, and the further into a highway we drove, it seemed the thunder became more violent and the lightning would crash down close to wherever we were approaching.

"We're almost there," She announced, looking back in the rear-view mirror to me, and I nodded again. "Remember first impressions-"

"Are the first chance to have them know you." I answered dully.

"And don't forget-"

"Your manners because they still count no matter how _old_ you are." I finished quickly. "I got it the last five times, I think I get it this time."

The car stopped moving suddenly and I noticed she was looking back at me expectantly, with a surprised expression, and even my jaw dropped down in absolute horror. We just stopped in front of a mansion.

"Um.. are you sure this is the right place? I mean... really?" I asked quickly, my eyes beginning to move over the entire house, and it did take a while to do so. The mansion was absolutely beautiful, and the architecture seemed to be from probably in the European classical times, with a deck to the right looking out to the lavish garden underneath it tat immediately caught my eye..

"Yes, this is the only place that has this address, Christine." She replied unsteadily, opening the door to the car, and coming around to open mine in the back seat. She opened the trunk and got my things out, handing them to me. It seemed like this house may be a good applicant to being haunted, looking almost as if it _belonged_ to the time period of which it was built like. "You should be very grateful indeed. I had no idea..." She trailed off, looking over the home, and then strictly on the large ebony door as it began to creak open.

"You must be Christine," A timid, accented voice said from the doorway, and I had to peel my eyes away to look at the man who was standing in the doorway. "Mr. Erik has been waiting very much for you to arrive. Let me take your bags." He said, and outstretched his arm, for me to rest my bags in, and I looked back to awestruck Mrs. Giry, looking at the man questionably. Raising an eyebrow she looked to me fiercely.

"Well, I should be on my way, Christine. You know when to call me when you need me, or if you need any advice." She explained shakily, dropping into her car, putting the keys into the ignition, and she began to drive away, when I stepped away from the evident servant, willing to serve me. I reached into my pocket to make sure the cell phone was still there thoughtlessly, and assured it was, my heart seemed to calm just a little.

"Follow me, if you will," He said looking to me curiously, as if I was some sort of strange creature. I walked behind him into the house, when I was almost overran with the grand beauty of it... I never been inside a house so lovely. The foyer was truly amazing, a chandelier hung dimly from the ceiling and every bit of furniture seemed to compliment it as if went down, even the stairs were some sort of golden marble, curving down to a few yards away from where I stood. As my eyes moved up the stairs, I noticed that there was something weird with the case to the right.

"Here she is, sir." The man carrying my bags said even more timidly, sounding as though he was intimidated.

For a second, I thought he was talking to air, when I looked up and saw a tall, and bone skinny man, almost dressed entirely in black, which included a mask that covered most of his face, with no intricate design, it was only a mask. Now I saw why this man was acting so strange to me... I felt immediately intimidated just looking at him as he gracefully moved down the stairs, I noticed that his golden eyes that seemed to glow in the dim room, were fixed on me.

"Take her bags to her room, Damon." The man on the stairs said... and I believe the first word he uttered seemed to just blow me away, it was so absolutely beautiful, flowing like velvet into my ear that caressed it before letting go, soothing everything, I stood in awe.

"Christine," He said my name with such care, pronouncing every syllable with its own evident honor, I really never knew my name was beautiful until he actually said it, "I've been waiting for you to come, I'm sure you'll find my home very comforting compared to the other homes you have been to."

I looked around once more, and I felt bare as he was right in front of me, short and exposed, his gaze was as if he was studying me, and though he wore a mask, it was like I could see every expression that he made through his eyes.

"Would you kindly make any acknowledgment that you are listening?" He asked, his eyes seeming to lose patience.

I nodded, of course, and blinked a few times, not really believing I was here, and I looked into his golden eyes as if I've never seen eyes before.

"Could you possibly say something?" He asked softly.

"Yes," I said instantly, tensing up, "I mean... Sorry... I've just... never been in such a home before." I said dully compared to his own voice. I felt myself warming up at the cheeks, and I began to play with my hands behind my back, folding and unfolding, studying every bone with probing fingers as they nervously played.

"It is very beautiful, isn't it?" He said thoughtfully, his eyes peeling away from me to look around.

"Very much," I whispered, my brow tensing, looking to him once more, though he was looking away.

"Would you like me to show you to your room before giving you a tour of the home?" He asked gently, and I nodded slowly. "Follow me, then."

I obeyed almost too willingly, determined to see the rest of the house with careful discretion of my own pleasurable desire. We walked up the stairs, and I noticed, now with his back turned, that he walked with as much grace as a feline, as if flowing with his own music only he can hear, and it was, in a way, beautiful. He caught me like this, looking back.

"Are you alright?" He asked, as if smiling, though I couldn't be certain.

"Yes, I'm fine... just... eager." I forced a smile to reassure him, and he turned around and climbed the stairs further as I followed attentively behind.

At the top of the stairs was the balcony that overlooked the entire foyer, and I could have a closer view of the large and beautiful chandelier that hung over it. Hallways were very dark, lit by nothing but a few dimly lit electric candelabras. I studied each one carefully, finding it strange to find in this home, though it wasn't reasonable. The hallways seemed to last forever, entwining labyrinthine-style to different doors that were shut.

He didn't name off rooms for my information at all like most acclaimed guardians would, he simply passed them all with indifference, as if not wanting me to know them at all. I had a sudden and rather embarrassing fear that I might just get lost in this mansion whenever I needed to get out of my room.

"Here is your room," He said quietly, and then opened the door with a key, and with an unfurling hand, opened the door to let me go inside.

It was also very beautiful, in all different shades of gold and red, a queen-sized bed was in the center, a writing desk was to the furthest wall near the curtained window, and two ebony doors were lined about the room, with a dresser and a beautiful mirror, a closet that looked large enough to be two bathrooms combined that was opened to reveal loads of clothing. I stood in the doorway with my mouth hanging open in disbelief.

"Why... Why this much? I don't even _know_ you?" I, for once, let my thoughts be known in a little too harsh of a tone. "Why should you take me in and give me these things...?" I asked, stepping into the room, outstretching my arms to show emphasis.

"If you do not already know... I have my own sources and money, and I can do these things to make you comfortable as possible. For your information... I do know you. You've just never known me. Now, if you care to clean up and come downstairs into the right-hand door where you will see a living area, on the wall adjacent to the fireplace you'll see a door that leads to the dining room, we will have dinner then." He said a little too quickly, taking a sudden coldness to his tone, and almost glared. I gasped in shock at his beautiful, warm voice being taken away as if by some sort of demon, and then replaced with the iciness of snow.

He shut the door behind him as he headed out, and I was left alone to my own thoughts. He said that he knew me... but I didn't know him. What in the world does this mean? I've never _seen_ him before. I was sure if I've ever met a man that wears a mask that covers his entire face, I would remember it forever, and then if I would have ever heard his voice before, that would haunt me forever just as it is now, his words echoing inside my head. I thought over it for a while; he looked young, in a way though he acted as if he was forty, and he stood tall and straight, and walked like a cat, was exceedingly rich, and acted as though he belonged in some other time period like a true gentleman. It was all too strange to me... No matter how inviting this home was, I don't believe I'll ever feel comfortable. The only bad part of this... I didn't want to go to that foster home with all the rejected teenagers that had no lives... My father would have never wanted that. So, all thoughts were agreed, I was stuck here... and I can't turn back now.

Heaving a very deep sigh, with a few tears pricking my eyes, I looked to the room admiringly, with a chilling sense of awkwardness to it, as if I was a country girl feeling air conditioning for the first time.

I curiously went to the other door that was left unopened, and with the golden handle, I opened the door slowly to reveal a large bathroom that was the size of my own bedroom with a glass-framed shower, porcelain toilet, and the tile was in an intricate design on the floor with another beautifully designed mirror, all the necessities lined the sink's cabinet.

"Whoa." Was all I could say to myself as I backed out of the bathroom slowly, looking to the bed which had my bags on it. I began to unpack my books from my bag, and placed them in a messy on the writing desk, thinking I should make it feel more like home instead of a neat and extravagant room that did not belong to me. I didn't bother fold my clothes as I began to put them into the drawers in the dresser, and threw my underwear in the top drawer.

I took out my picture folder carefully, not to bend it more than it already has been as I travel, and looked to my mother and father's smiling face as they held their hands together, clasping each other affectionately. My mother wither her bronze hair that was pulled into a elegant bun at the top of her head, the wedding dress fitting her body almost perfectly, and then my father with his goofy smile and narrowed eyes at my mother. His dark brown hair slicked back with a dapper tuxedo making him looking just as handsome as my mother was beautiful, though I have only dim memories of my mother, I held her close just as I would my father. I took the photo and held it close to my chest, hanging my head low, clutching it like I would hold a life vest to stay afloat.

What would they think if I was in this sort of situation? Would they tell me to get away, or, to be safe, stay here until you need to leave...? I almost had to smack myself out of this sort of hazing... _This is your own life, Christine, don't ponder the past, _a voice in the back of my head said... Raoul's voice to be exact. Raoul Chagny, an incredibly close family friend that I haven't seen since my father passed away at the funeral, and he kissed me... on the lips, a very long and heart-felt goodbye.

I shook my head again, moaning in rage at myself... they were too warm of memories, too fond, and they shouldn't exist right now.

I soon finished putting my belongings away and I began to take in deep breaths to choke down the awkward phase and not absolute feelings toward this strange man. I opened my door to the long and narrow hallway with a little light at the end of it, and I assumed it was reflected from the foyer's chandelier. I walked down quickly so my uncertainty was turned absolute. Fortunately enough, I found myself at the beginning of the staircase and I walked down it lightly, taking the grandness of it once more, as if another slap in the face.

I eagerly opened the door he noted for me to take, revealing a living room with a plush sofa and chairs all around it in it's Victorian-styled theme that goes throughout this entire house, the fireplace seemed to make the somewhat dead-looking room come to life, with paintings and works of art that held the beauty to somewhat modern times.

There were a few bookshelves that lined the wall near the fireplace, and then in the middle between the two, there was a door that I assumed led to the dining room. Just before opening it, I noticed movement in the peripheral vision of my eye, and I jumped around to see the man rising before me, some sort of mocking amusement to my quirkiness, and I backed away, with my eyes still wide.

"I'm very sorry to startle you," His comforting voice assured, coming up from the chair that faced away from me, a book in his long, bony hands.

"No, it's nothing, really... Just.. easily startled, I guess." I said quickly for his sincerity of his apology. I blushed, feeling slightly sheepish again.

"Here, let me help you a little by giving you a hint." I think he smiled again, and turned to point at the door directly across from where I stood. "That door, dear, that you are standing by leads to the music room," he mused, and then looked to the door his long, slender finger was still pointing at, "_That_ door leads to the dining room."

I had to give a small smile at my stupidity, still with fiery red cheeks, "Oh."

"No, it's fine. I, too, sometimes get lost in this house, and _I_ designed it." He explained proudly. I looked at him again with amazement.

"Wow!" I said, my eyebrows raising, thoroughly impressed. "Well, this house is impeccably beautiful. I don't think I could compliment it enough."

And he smiled once more, "Well, many thanks as well. I'm glad you enjoy it." He said furtively.

"My dad used to be interested in architecture among other things... he used to take me to houses that were historic in their architecture just to look... as you probably know, we would have never lived in them." Wow... Why was I sharing this? "I always thought it was interesting... Like a sculpture, in a way, except you can_ live_ in your own art."

He nodded, hands behind his back professionally, and I studied him once more with his movements, how they tell so much more about him than the mask. Why did he wear it, anyway? Only criminals wear mask to hide their identity... was he a criminal? No... that couldn't be, he's done nothing but good for me yet, how could criminals be so warm? Then... why _did_ he wear it? The questions went through my head as I stared at it, with strange eyes.

"Might I escort you to the dining room, then?" He asked to distract me away from the mask once more.. after all, it was very rude to stare.

I shrugged, "Sure."

He nodded and outstretched his hand for me to take and reluctantly, Idid. His fingers were strangely cold, and I shuddered away, letting go of his hand out of shock. "Oh, forgive me," He implored quickly as if he just did something horrible.

I looked up quickly for he wasn't looking down, confused instantly. He opened up the door to reveal a table with another brilliant chandelier hanging down once more, one of two cushioned wooden chairs had a lavish dinner laid out, and on the other end, the same chair except there was nothing. I looked up expectantly for an explanation as he sat me down on the chair that had two slices of turkey, corn, mashed potatoes, and a salad laid out expertly, adorned with things that were not necessary and you would see in five-star hotels instead of in an ordinary household.

"I hope this is all to your liking." He wished quietly. I nodded simply and sat down, trying very hard to remember table etiquette from the first house I went to with the OCD parents. Mechanically, I placed the napkin on my lap, taking the fork and knife into my hand, quietly said grace in my head, and stabbed a piece of lettuce, and looked at it scornfully before looking up to him, seated opposite of me.

"Do you not eat?" I asked.

"I already have. If you could excuse me for that much... I do not eat often in front of people." He almost pleaded, seeing my mechanical movements.

"Neither do I..." I whispered to myself, trying to imagine that he was not there, watching my every move. I bit into the lettuce slowly, realizing how truly hungry I was, and then shoved the entire piece into my mouth.

"You don't have to be very mannered in front of me, dear... I know you're hungry."

I didn't rebel with fake lady-like elegance, and began stabbing more lettuce and carrots and radishes that were flavored with my favorite dressing, and putting them into my mouth. The salad wasn't very large, so I headed onto the turkey, savoring its juicy meat for it was most likely the best cooked turkey I've ever had. It was as if it was Thanksgiving in Mrs. Valerius' home all over again. Once finished with the first slice, I accidentally looked up to him, still watching intently, and put down the knife.

"Don't feel so intimidated, I would like you to be comfortable.

"Can you not... stare at me?" I asked stupidly.

"Forgive me," He replied quickly, averting his eyes to the chandelier thoughtfully as if he never had before.

"It's fine," I assured, creasing my brow.

"Tell me, Christine, do you still sing?" He asked carefully, looking back to me because I didn't bother to take another bite.

"Sing?" I asked quietly... How would he have known I sang?

"Yes, I've heard you used to sing all the time." He replied with indifference, as if it wasn't strange that he knew such things.

"How did you know?" I asked slowly, narrowing my eyes.

"It was on your application, dear. It's not that hard." I didn't know if this was truth or not, for I've never seen my application. But I suppose Mrs. Giry put down my interests as well as my other personal things... I just don't remember telling her what I used to do, either.

"Oh," I whispered, "I haven't sang in two years." I replied, "When my father died, I think the music that I loved went with him to the grave. I'm sorry." I whispered, slicing another piece of turkey and swallowing it.

"Would you mind at all if I tutored you? I would very much like to hear your voice?"

"Tutor me?" I asked slowly once more, looking up from my plate again, catching my hand in midair before the turkey into my mouth.

"That is what I just said," He replied impatiently. "I don't have to, but I thought it might get your mind off of everything for a while. I find music does that for me, and I have never taken in a student before."

"You're a musician, too?"

"Most likely more skilled in music than any other talent, I believe, but yes, I am a musician." He fondly said.

"Like... all music? Or just one instrument?"

"Just about everything, but opera is my specialty."

"Opera?" I asked...he sounded just like my father when he spoke of music, saying the word as if speaking to a lover. "Um... Sure. You can teach me..." I said, chewing then swallowing again.

I think he smiled once more, for now his eyes were squinted.

"Wonderful." Was his reply.


	2. Lessons

_Chapter 2:_

_Lessons_

After dinner, he offered a tour of the mansion, and I enthusiastically agreed as he led me out of the dining room, trusting that the servants would clean the dishes. Though I haven't seen the servants, I knew they were there from evidence that my room was later cleaned.

He led me out to the living room, and walked across the room to the door he said led to the music room and opened it to reveal the greatest music room I believe I've ever seen. To be exact, it was basically a room literally filled to the top with music and instruments. The instruments lined the walls, possibly every instrument I've ever heard of, and some that looked rather exotic. A grand piano was in the center of the room and surrounding it, was sheets and sheets of music that looked either composed or printed by classical, baroque, and modern composers, all concocted into a big mess.

"Excuse the mess," he said, as if almost reading my mind. "I tell the servants that this room is not to be touched... so this is my way of organization."

I smiled as I walked further into the room, careful not to step on the sheets, letting my fingers run over the piano lovingly.

"Do you like it? The piano is my favorite instrument."

"I think it's beautiful... I always wanted a grand piano... I can't play it correctly, unfortunately, because my fingers are too short and I can't reach broad chords, but I taught myself when we had a keyboard in my old dining room and I would sit there for hours figuring out songs because I couldn't afford to buy music books with my own money." I smiled at the memory, "But next to the voice, I think the piano is the most beautiful instrument next to violin."

"You can show so much emotion with those instruments. Well, not that you can't with any other instrument, but I think it's the entire concert-like feeling of them that gives off the portrayal." He explained thoughtfully. And I nodded in agreement. "This is where we will come for your lessons every morning a few hours after breakfast, just before lunch, understand?" He asked, suddenly more serious.

I cringed at the loss of beauty once more in his voice, "Sounds good." I replied dully and without a turning glance, I walked out of the room with him, as he turned the lights out from behind.

From that door, there was a hallway that led to more rooms, and the first door to the left a light was left on. He opened it with the same amount of grace as before, and it revealed a room that had shelves and shelves of book, probably more books than a public library held. I glanced at some titles that were in other languages, and then classical and modern titles that were familiar to me: Edgar Allen Poe, Charles Dickens, and many more that I could not read from where I stood. There was a sitting area this time with leather chairs, and then a few yards from there was a desk with papers and thick books, along with a globe to complete the office-like feeling.

"You're welcome in the library any time. I know you love books." He said fondly, looking down to me, still stunned by its beauty.

"Ok," I managed to say, suddenly excited at the books that I'm yet to read, and the sense of freedom suddenly to move, for it was truly a gift in this sort of house.

We moved out of that room and he took me further down the hallway to a door across from the library, and only gestured toward it, "Bathroom," He named and I nodded, and he turned back down the hallway, leaving only another room left unsaid.

"What is that room down there?" I asked quietly.

"My bedroom. For privacy reasons, I do hope that I don't offend you by saying to keep away. As I intend on granting your own privacy."

"I understand," I replied quietly.

"Good," he sounded relieved.

We moved back to the foyer, ignoring many more doors, therefore making the tour of the mansion, not-so-much of a tour.

"There are some rooms, Christine, that I wish you not to see," He explained in response, once more, to my thoughts. I didn't respond, not being able to think of anything. We began to move up the stairs into the various hallways upstairs. My curiosity made me begin to worry about what he was hiding... secrets he didn't want me to know... I didn't know what to think, so automatically, I preferred not to think at all at my too-imaginative mind.

He showed another door, labeling it a bathroom, and the next, a guest bedroom, obviously untouched. The next room was another office, and the rest were not named. So, basically, I occupied only twenty-five percent, the other seventy-five percent was made of nothingness that I should keep away from... Either that or the house was far too large for one man, and then I wonder why he even chose to be here in the first place.

"You must be tired, Christine," He noted quietly, stopping in front of my room, ending the not-so-much of a tour. I wasn't tired until he basically lulled me with his voice to believing it. I shook my head, still lost in confusion.

"Um... yeah. Very. Suddenly." And I yawned, as he opened the door to my room slowly.

"I bid you goodnight, Christine."

"Goodnight," I replied and stepped into the room, shutting the door behind me.

I went to the dresser and pulled out my own night gown, uncomfortable with the fact that he offered me all of these things, so I decided to ignore it for as long as possible. I pulled down the covers and slipped into them, the bed being so comfortable, I believe I fell into a deep sleep instantaneously.

I awoke to the dim light of the morning showing through the curtains across from my bed, showing through my eyelids, the sun very welcomed in this darker home. The morning found me deeply confused and stunned, once more, at the magnificence of the home, but I hurried to get away from it. I peeked into the closet curiously, finding clothes from designer stores, with brand names that I could never have afforded. Shoes that were also designer that were my exact size of foot, and it was all stretched out into a walk-in closet. I shut the door, closing my eyes, and shook my head disbelievingly.

I opened the door once more, and everything was still intact.I _stepped_ into the closet, looking for an outfit to wear with the amount of excitement as a little kid on Christmas day.

I pulled out a casual shirt and some shorts that probably cost more than my home (well, not really, but I think jeans are usually overpriced). They were all in the latest summer fashions, rest assured, and it seemed dutifully perfect.

I ransacked my upper drawers of my dresser for underwear finding even more designer items, and I shut the drawer immediately, residing with my own belongings, blushing.

I took it into the bathroom, finding expensive shampoo and conditioner on the ledge of the glass shower with big fluffy towels on the lid of the toilet. I hung them up and took my shower, feeling very replenished.

I walked down the stairs, feeling every bit uncomfortable as I did before, and went into the living room to find myself abandoned. I walked into the dining room where a plate of expertly made pancakes covered in syrup and steaming bacon awaited me with a glass of milk next to it, along with a note which read in a lazy hand.

_I went out to run some errands. I will be back before you finish eating, so do not worry on my behalf. Enjoy your breakfast. _

_~Erik_

I shrugged, relieved that he wouldn't sit there and stare at me for the entire meal, and dug into the pancakes, taking forkfuls into my mouth. Once more impeccably delectable.

While on myself, I resolved in looking through thoughts that I never had enough time for between the surprises that awaited me yesterday. Thoughts of Raoul flooded my mind, his smiling blue eyes, and Meg with her pixie-like qualities and hyper, brightness to her that always brought a smile to my face. I began to wonder whether I will be able to see people outside of this house, or if Erik might restrict me. I took note of it as I began eating the bacon, to ask him that when I see him again.

I just realized, though, that this was the chance to take in my curiosity... When he wasn't watching. I almost leaped out of my chair and opened the door in the dining room that I've never opened before. I opened it widely, expecting to see something utterly surprising, but all I saw, was a kitchen, emptied and dull...

Okay, then, I thought to myself, shutting the door uselessly, and sat back into my chair, eating my bacon.

"Good morning," Came Erik's voice suddenly, almost forcing me to choke on the milk as I swallowed. I restrained myself from spitting it back out, so I forcefully chugged it down, wiping my mouth, and placed the cup down forcefully.

"Morning." I said, sounding angry for him startling again.

"I'm sorry to startle you again..." He apologized, taking off his hat, his fingers outlying the perimeter of it as if suddenly nervous.

"It's fine... but can you not do that? It's like you walk through walls or something..." I glared. He didn't answer for a second, seeming to take my words as offending, feeling slightly guilty, "I don't mean to be offensive."

"It's not," He replied, glaring through his beaming eyes and sat down at the opposite side of the table, looking at my plate. "What would you like to do?" He asked curiously.

I looked to the ceiling and shrugged, "Could I hear you play?" I questioned timidly.

"For our lesson, I may play something." he answered, his tone pleasing for not another word.

"Okay, then." I replied and left the dining room without another word, and went to read in the library until the lesson would begin. It wasn't until an hour later that he came into the library.

"Let us begin our lesson, shall we?" He announced as he stepped toward me. I shrunk away naturally, already intimidated by him being so tall compared to me.

"Yeah... sure." I replied and rose from my chair.

I followed him hesitantly, my brow furrowed as it seemed to remain. It didn't take long for my annoyance at his mysterious ways to come about, for it doesn't take much to annoy me on the inside, though I never let it go except when someone wasn't looking. It was rare for me to actually speak my word... though with him, I don't know how much longer I could keep it in. I felt selfish, but I wanted to confront him and demand answers. Of course I wouldn't do that, but it was a nice thought.

He sat at the piano bench and beckoned me over. I looked at him and then began to walk forth with the thoughts in my head, I probably looked as if he might bite me for some reason, but I was near him despite, looking at his mask bitterly.

"To begin lessons we should start with breathing exercises," He said slowly. "So, follow what I do, and try to mimic me." He said. "Breathe in for four counts, and breathe out for four counts."

I nodded and he began to count, unfurling his hand as if to signal for me to breathe in now. He counted, while breathing in, in time till four, and then counted to four as he breathed out. I did what he did, though he stopped short, looking at my stomach.

"You're not breathing properly." He noted in a concerned tone. He placed a hand on my back gently, and I felt some sort of electric shock run through my body where he touched. I shuddered, and he frowned, "Now, breathe in from here," he placed a hand onto my lower stomach, "instead of here." And put the hand higher on my stomach where my ribs were, his cold hands running through the fabric of my shirt. I shuddered suddenly away his touch.

"Forgive me, once more, Christine. I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable." He said dully, with less feeling as all the other times he unnecessarily apologized.

"No, no, it's fine. I know I wasn't breathing right." I replied hastily, feeling his tension.

"Good. Now, try again, and fill all of your lungs with air."

I did exactly what he did again, and obeyed the advice he gave me before.

"Wonderful. Now, breathe in for one, and breathe out for twelve." He instructed. Raising his hand, he counted to one, and I breathed in, as he began to count to twelve, I gradually breathed out.

"Good. Now, mimic me on the word, 'la.'" He instructed, and with his grand voice... he began to _sing_... And... oh, how he sang. It was a simple scale, but he made it sound like a beautiful song, his voice flowed like velvet once more, caressing my entire body this time, making goosebumps raise on my skin. It stopped suddenly, and he stared at me with dim amusement.

"Your voice... It's just so beautiful, I'm sorry." I apologized hastily, and he shooed it off.

"I've had that plenty of times before." He shrugged, and repeated the scale again, expecting me to repeat. I did so, my voice sounding horrible versus his. I half expected him to scold it, but he only went on with the scale, singing it a pitch higher. The scales only got higher and higher, and I was well passed able to sing them to their full extent, surprisingly enough, and I finally cracked on the high B as I usually was able to.

"Your voice is beautiful, Christine, though we do have much work on it ahead." He observed thoughtfully. I nodded in agreement, not willing to go against his wishes, but I thought I sounded good though I haven't opened my mouth to sing in two years.

Over the course of the lesson, he handed me a piece of music and instructed me to study it. He sung it, an octave lower so he could sing it, and it was obviously an operatic piece... an aria to begin with, simple yet the way he sang it, he made it all the more intricate. I hardly studied it, I simply looked at him, singing through a mask... now who in the world could perfect it other than he himself? Pronouncing it in perfect French accents.

"Were you listening, Christine?"

_Hell, yeah! _I thought to myself, but all I could say was, "Yes."

He said something unacknowledged under his breath and then shut the piano lid.

"We'll work some more tomorrow." He rasped and rose from the bench.

"Tomorrow? You mean everyday?" I asked, exasperatedly.

"Well, yes." He nodded, shoving it off. "If you want to work on your voice, you must consistently work on it." He explained as if I was insane for saying such things. I shrunk away, looking to him the same way he was looking at me. It made my heart drop to the lowest pit in my stomach the way he looked at me.

"I'm... going to go to my room and read." I said, not wanting to stay with him much longer, feeling utterly stupid with this conversation. I clenched my fists for his impatience, and stomped off like a child, leaving him there befuddled, most likely.

I took out one of my favorite books, _Pride and Prejudice, _and sat onto the bed and began to read, being taken immediately into another world without masked men and big mansions, and thoughts of death. Instead, a beloved romance... and I thought of Raoul.

I only got to reading for ten minutes, according to the alarm clock beside my bed, when the vibration of my cell phone on the desk pulled me off the bed instantly. I almost completely forgot about the outside world in this house which didn't have a television or any source of outside communication besides a cell phone and car, so it shocked me a little to be welcomed back into the real world for just a moment.

I picked the little black cell phone up and looked at the unfamiliar number, curious, I pressed talk and pressed it to my ear.

"Hello?" I asked, resting my elbow onto my hand.

"Christine? Is this you?" A familiar voice asked from the small receiver. I almost squealed.

"Raoul!? Oh, my God! Raoul! How did you get this number?" I asked almost too loudly.

"Meg Giry told me, of course. I heard you moved again and, well, so did I. I was thinking you and I go out... you know, to eat."

"Where are you?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"I moved to a new place on the southern side of Annapolis." He said, sounding as though he was smiling.

"I think I'm near there..." I whispered, looking out the window to forest. "Listen, Raoul, my new guardian is pretty strange. I may just have to ask him, and I'll call you back soon when I get an answer, okay?"

"Sounds good." He replied, and I hung up, grabbing my phone and I ran to my door, my heart thudding excitedly, and opened the door. To my utmost horror and surprise, Erik was standing there, leaning on the threshold of the door, with his arms crossed. I gasped, falling back slightly covering my mouth to block the startled scream.

"You did it again!" I said, looking away to shrug it off.

"Are you going to ask me something?" He asked coolly, not caring about whatever I had to say.

I choked down a nervous swallow and nodded slowly, "Yes." His eyes were taunting me now, as I shrunk further and further back into the recluse of myself.

"You want to see that boy, I suppose?" He asked slowly, his eyes glaring down to me and my heart, for some reason, began to thud harder it felt as if it might come out of my chest and take flight in his face.

"I haven't seen him in forever, and he just moved here... Could I see him tonight?" I rushed quickly, bending my hands behind my back.

"No." He replied without any sort of thought to it.

I glowered on it for a second, not believing he actually just said that. I glared up to him. "...And why not?" I asked brokenly, the bravado of the moment wearing off, as my shoulders relaxed back and I crossed my arms.

He softened suddenly, his eyes no longer glaring, "All I ask is for you to be comfortable here. Besides, Christine, how could I know to trust this boy?"

I looked up to him in utter disbelief now, my jaw hanging low. That struck something in my chest as rage began to boil in my chest. "..._Excuse_ me?" I asked softly with unintentional acid dripping into my tone.

"Christine, I implore you to calm down. You may see him some other time." He unfurled his hand carelessly.

"You're not my father," I said slowly looking angrily to him. "You can't tell me what to do!" I huffed angrily, the anger feeling well in my throat as it was relieved slowly.

"Yes, Christine, it is true I'm not, but dear, I am your legal guardian right now and I can tell you to do what I wish for you to do. I just told you you may see him soon!" He said, using the beauty of his voice to lull me again, and I almost fell for it naturally.

I shook my head, "Look, Erik... Raoul is one of my only friends... The least you can do to make me comfortable _anywhere_ is to let me see him... Let me see him and I'll do whatever you damn well want me to do." I hissed the last words.

"I'm afraid I can't let you." He said, still very indifferent to my words.

"_What_?" I asked letting my jaw drop once more, and I crossed my arms. He was _impossible_! And he was only a few years older, it seemed. But his eyes were very threatening, I knew I couldn't persuade this man any further.

"Don't be a little child, Christine. You need to grow up, and you need to learn now." He said, his voice suddenly as powerful as a god's, inviting and beautiful. I snapped out of it again and glared at his mask this time. I coiled away, backing away from the door at his painful words.

"I _hate_ you." I hissed, grabbing the door handle and slamming it shut on his face. I slid down on the door, actually feeling like an angry child, and I began to cry into my arms. Scared for my life that my guardian was this powerful.

After a few minutes of crying, I looked up to hear him leaving the doorway, and hearing the lock click on my door. Oh, my God... he locked me in here! He locked me in this room! Who the hell did he think he is?

"You can come out once you get over this, Christine!" He called back, hearing my gasp of realization. I tried the doorknob stupidly, finding it definitely locked with no way to pick it from in here. I sighed, banging my head onto the door and slamming my fist against it, succumbing for now.

I looked around for my cell phone in order to call Raoul back, except for the fact that I realized I had it in my hands when I confronted Erik, and I was too distracted with my anger, I dropped it. Panic reached my chest, looking under the crevice of the door to see if I was able to spot it not so far away, and it was gone. Obviously, Erik took it from me... and now I had nothing to do.

"Give my cell phone back, Erik!" I called out, banging on the door noisily. There was silence on the other side. "Give it back now!" Again, no answer.

I couldn't even call Mrs. Giry to tell her I was stuck with a over-controlling guardian and I'd rather go spend the rest of my days as a 17-year-old in a foster home. I leaned my head against the door and looked up, massaging my temples. Maybe I was being a little childish... My dad would have done the same thing... except for the fact Erik is no where near being my dad.

I resided in resuming reading my book except that I couldn't pay attention, so I leaned my head back against the pillow and spent the rest of the day waiting for Erik to let me out.


	3. Planning Against

**Yes, quick updates also are a sign of a slow summer life and travel. I beg to differ, though, that I am very busy... just not today. It may not even be the best writing, either, for I'm not very proud of it, but I implore you that the next chapter will be impeccably interesting. I'd like to say a very profound thanks to the reviewers that I have already, because without the comments I've received, and the knowledge that people are reading, this quick update wouldn't be possible. *LOL* I sound like I just received a Tony:P Anyways-enjoy the chapter though it's not much *kicks ground dramatically***

**~The Phantom's Flutist**

**P.S. Reviews are still very welcome, of course! **

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__Chapter 3:_

_Planning Against_

It wasn't until four in the afternoon that I heard my lock click, and I simply stayed on my bed looking to the ceiling, studying the designs and making pictures of it with my eyes. He knocked on the door with his bony hands, and it sounded like wood against wood, sending chills once more through my spine.

"May I come in?" He asked quietly from behind the door. I didn't answer, looking up to the ceiling again, and began to hum to block out his voice.

"Christine, answer me," He demanded, still not losing the maddening calmness to it. And I didn't answer him despite.

"Christine, are you even in there?" He asked quickly, beginning to bang on the door impatiently.

"Go away." I rasped, resuming my humming.

"Just let me make it up to you, I really did not mean to be so stern earlier. Can I_ please_ come in?" He begged sounding relieved at hearing my voice somewhat.

"Did you not hear me? I said go away. You're not my father, and you're not my parent. I've only known you for forty-eight hours and I already hate you. If you value my sanity so much, I would like it very much if you went _away_." I protested angrily

The door began to creak open and in a split second, it seemed, he was right next to me, with an outstretched hand, looking at me with so much as his dignity. "Could you forgive me once more, Christine? Just once more, and I will leave you alone."

I finally turned my head to look at him, his eyes narrowed at the corners, and he was now pleading me with such a guilty voice, hurt at my ignorance... I rose from my bed and looked at him curiously, tilting my head to the side.

"Why do you wear a mask?" I asked looking over it once more. He tensed almost instantly and placed his hand back by his side slowly, looking over me with disbelief at my simple question.

"That is a question reserved for another time." The cryptic answer annoyed me to no end. I left it at that, not wanting to anger him again. "Are you hungry?" He asked gently, looking over me. "You can either eat downstairs with me or up here. It's your choice."

"I'll be downstairs in a second," I muttered under my breath, looking at myself in the mirror for my hair was in a big knot around my head, thanks to curly brown hair. I looked at myself and sighed, I was already so pale and dull, and felt lifeless simply looking at my reflection. I immediately looked away.

The day went by slowly, very slowly. I spent the rest of the night reading my book in the library until the late hours and he came and told me to go to sleep. I reluctantly obeyed his orders, and went into my bedroom, and fell into another deep sleep.

The following few days consisted of almost the same exact things and I ignored Erik just as he seemed to want to ignore me. The only time we said anything to each other was during lessons where every once in a while he would lose patience with me and continue the lesson as I began to sing the opera arias with his extremely helpful hints. He never complimented me in any way like my old teacher used to, but I was so impressed with my own voice, that I began to believe that it wasn't even my own.

The first conversation that ever seemed to take place after a lesson was my simple question that arose many more questions. "Do you think I'll be able to perform sometime?" I asked timidly, looking to his thin black hair for he was turned toward the piano. He was silent, as if stunned I was talking again.

It took him long before he actually answered, in a shaky, small voice that made me wonder what he was actually thinking for such a question.

"Soon, dear... soon you will astound, but you must know, when you have your pride... that you are singing for me." He said full-heartedly, and I opened my mouth to say something more, and then shook my head, shutting it. Singing for _him_? I'm the one with the voice. How is it his choice of who I sing for?

Angered, I lingered on the question that I've been wanting to ask for the past seven days, "Can I have my cell phone back?" I guess it was stupid, but the thought of getting out of this home seemed to make me delighted.

"No," He said simply, rising from the chair, and before I could say anything else, he was gone, and so was my chance.

I thought of many things... first, I must earn his trust by being as affectionate as I was when I first came here, then I get my cell phone, and then I can ask if I can go with Raoul to that dinner which was originally planned, and if not, then I could escape by hunting down the servants and demanding them take me. Yes... I even wrote it all down on my diary that I was keeping with all the paper hidden in the writing desk.

I began talking to him again, just as he probably wished it, and we usually spoke in the library, where I spent most of my time, and he, in the music room. Sometimes when he knew I was going into the library, he would follow like a dog on my feet just because he knew I'd speak to him there. It was curious behavior, I must say, but if it got what I wanted, I felt free to manipulate on my whim.

"Do you have a last name, Erik?" I asked, putting my finger in between the two pages that I was reading, resting the book on my lap.

"I have many," he replied furtively, and I arched an eyebrow.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked demandingly, still annoyed once more at the cryptic remarks. "You can only _have _one last name as your father has..."

"I never had a father." He answered, suddenly cold once more.

"You must have... everyone has a father." I pressed, trying to be concerned, but faking every whim. Did I mention I was once an actress?

"I never _knew_ him." He hissed.

"But you had a mother," I whispered, "Right?"

"I never had a mother," he hissed even colder now, though I knew he held something against whoever she was. I believed I pried enough so I remained quiet.

"Is there something wrong?" I asked, realizing I was bringing something upon him that he'd rather not have. Natural human guilt wiped over me, and I scooted closer in my chair to where he was sitting on the sofa.

He looked at me with bright, golden eyes that looked sad, "Bad memories."

"I'm sorry," I whispered, seeing that I couldn't help in anyway, so I rest my case, and resumed reading.

It eventually came to the comfort level he had with me that I felt good to ask him the burning question.

"I'm fine, Christine, you were curious, and I cannot blame you for that," He explained in a soothing voice and I nodded contentedly.

"I was wondering..." I began knowing that now was my chance. "Because I basically now know this place as home, may I have my cell phone back?" I asked.

"What makes you think I took it?" He acted surprised.

"No, a better question would be what_ doesn't_ make me think that you took it. You just don't want me to leave the house."

"I believe we've established this—you're not leaving just yet." His voice sent chills down my spine.

"Erik..." I moaned.

"Christine," He said, his voice raising slightly.

I huffed, and crossed my arms across my chest. "You're lying when you say that you only want me here to be more comfortable... There's some other reason. Tell me." I ordered, trying to make my voice sound just as powerful as his, but failed on that part.

"It is nothing but the truth, darling."

"Lying again... If I said I'd be back before nine o' clock would you let me go?"

"He's busy, I'm sure, with moving in. Leave him alone for now."

"He moved in a week ago! I'm sure the movers are not that slow! Especially for his family's money. Erik, please..." I clasped my hands together dramatically, feeling as if I might just cry in front of him, "You're being overprotective! My father would always let me go with Raoul."

"You've said I'm not your father." He excused slyly.

I glowered once more at him and groaned. "You're impossible!"

"We've established this as well. Now, Christine, are you going to throw another fit in rebellion and I need to put you in your room again, or will you just please _calm down." _His voice was even more so irresistible and he seemed to have found my own weak point. I glared, settling further into the plush chair, and rest my head against the back of the chair, looking to the ceiling again, my mind already concocting ways of escape. Once he goes out for "errands" again, I'll go into his desk and begin searching for my cell phone.

"I hate you, hate you, hate you!" I screamed at him, burying my face in my hands. I would give anything to see Raoul again... to be in his arms and for him to tell me it's all okay, that it will be fine. And he wouldn't be biased and overprotective, and demanding, and he'd be just as kind as he has always been.

"I'm sure you don't mean that." He was reassuring himself, it seemed, as if trying to ignore my words, flinching at my every word.

"I do mean it!" I rebelled, feeling all the more like a child with him around, more so then I ever have. "I don't understand you at all... If you could just tell me the truth for once... and stop hiding so much. You hide your face, and over than half this mansion from me, and I need at least partially an explanation... Why did you even take me in when nobody else would?_ I want to know_." I pleaded, trying hard not to cry, my throat feeling swollen.

"You want to know why, Christine?" He asked, looking to me slowly with warm eyes, and a hopeful expression underneath that mask.

I nodded, feeling extremely confused almost instantly. The silence between us was suddenly very intense as he looked at me with big and somewhat beautiful golden eyes. He grabbed my hands and engulfed my smaller hands into his larger, bony ones, and he looked down to them as if it was incredible at this simple touch. I couldn't help but grimace at it, the questions beginning to bother me more than anything has ever bothered me before, foretelling that this was rather big of an answer he would produce.

"Know, Christine... That I care very much for you, and it would pain me very much to see you harmed in any way." His voice made this simple statement sound with so much meaning, that something deepened in my chest both of confusion and ignorant demand for the knowledge of more...

"I don't_ know _you..." I breathed lightly, looking to our hands, and thought that I might just pull away, but the better part of me let him hold my hands, my _human_ part of me told me that he wanted to hold them.

"I know," He replied just as softly, if not softer, as my voice, and he brought my hand to where his mouth might just be and held it firmer, and let it drop.

I began to back away, feeling my heart thud at the hidden truth that he is trying to hint at... the truth that is quite disturbing and I couldn't feel anything about it.

I quickly turned away, and made a mad dash out of the room, leaving him there in the library just as he might just say something like "wait" but I didn't listen just as he never listens to me. I went up to my room, and jumped onto my bed, digging my head into my pillow and began to cry, not a deep, scornful cry, but a cry that I don't want to be here. Out of all the homes I've been to, this must be the worst one. No matter how grand it is, no matter how kind he is at letting me stay here, I wanted to leave and go to that foster home. I wanted to be with Raoul and he wasn't letting me. Raoul being the only connection I had to my father... Yes, that's what hurt the most. Being denied someone I hold dearly ached, especially when it was dealing with my father. I went into the drawer of my nightstand, and took out the picture of my father and I just before he died a month later.

We were on vacation in Maine, and we were standing just near the edge of the rock overlooking a lighthouse, his hands clasped around me, and I was only fourteen at the time, and I had short hair with curls that bushed out at both sides, and next to me was Raoul, just as tall as I with a big, cheesy grin on his face that I've known him for and teased him about though I haven't seen him since then. It was there that the memory hit me like a pound of ice.

_"What's a girl like you doing out in a cold night like this?" A somewhat familiar voice asked from not so far away._

I turned around, gasping, to see Raoul walking toward my seat by the ocean, his short blond hair in a disarray from all the wind, his blue eyes bright, he looked almost distilled when he was standing there looking down to me.

_  
"Sitting here, saying goodbye to something like freedom. What are you doing out here?"_

"Greedily disturbing your peace to tell you something," He smiled.

"What is it you want to tell me?" I asked, putting down my shawl, to get up. That stupid move created from distraction caused it to start blowing away out into the water. I gave a squeak which was meant to be a scream as it blew further into the sea with the crashing waves. "Darn it!" I said, stomping my foot, "There's no way I'm going in there..."

"I'll get it," Raoul murmured nonchalantly.

I laughed. "You don't have to do that!" I replied, holding his arm so he wouldn't bother, but he was already taking off his jacket in order to go into the water.

"Raoul!" I laughed, grabbing hold of his arm, aghast for a second. But the impenetrable boy would simply not listen. It was at this moment that I think I fell for him. Literally. He pulled forward laughing at my clumsiness and then I collapsed into the water, my skirt becoming very wet.

"Don't worry, I'll dry off once I'm done." He called back as he dived into the depths of the water, and began to swim strongly against the current and all I could was stand there and watch him swim for my scarf as his mother threw the door open, and screamed his name, but he eventually reached my scarf unperturbed by her callous pleas for him to return to shore immediately.

I couldn't stop laughing in a flattered way, knowing very deeply that he was, indeed, stupid, but I think he felt the same way as I did... in a way, at least.

_  
Breathlessly, he reached out to hand me my dripping wet scarf, and folded over, putting his hands on his knees, and huffing deep breaths. "Here you go, Christine," His voice, though, was not effected by his exasperated rasps. _

_  
"Dear Lord, Raoul," His mother cried, shaking her head, running as fast as her old feet will take her in the sand. "Why did you do that? Why did you do that?" She repeated, over and over again, scolding him, and the following words that she said to him I kind of chose not to hear, but I turned away._

"Christine!" He called, turning away from his mom, calling over her nagging voice. I turned back around with a big, sheepish smile on my face.

"Yes?" I asked melodramatically.

"_I'll see you tomorrow, okay? We'll pack up together, alright?" He asked desperately, and I couldn't help but nod, still with the big smile plastered to my face._

The smile was still on my face as I found myself looking up to the ceiling once more.

Suddenly, the door opened, and a woman stepped in with large eyes and feeble hands. I looked at her curiously as she stared back in the same way, as if I was so different from the rest of this room. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised that there was a maid in here, I mean... how could one man keep the entire house himself? Not to mention with all the things he goes through in here, I'm sure it requires attention.

"Good evening, Miss Daae," She greeted a little too brightly.

"Good evening," I replied reluctantly.

"I came to change the covers," she replied innocently, "So if you could please..." she began and didn't have to finish, I went over to the chair and sat into it, folding my legs up.

"Do you know of any possible way I could leave?" I asked suddenly, as she began to strip the bed, she didn't react for the longest time. She wasn't replying, and I questioned her again.

"Master Erik wouldn't like me telling you."

"I don't care what he likes or dislikes. You can blame it on me for all I care, I would just really want to get out for a while. I'll come back, of course..." I said hurriedly, and she turned to face me slowly.

"I can't help you, I'm sorry." She shook her head, and then I groaned dramatically, and looked away from her and begrudgingly out the window.

"Then... could you at least tell me where he has put my cell phone so I could call someone who _could_ help me? Or do you know when he'll be leaving to run on an errand?"

She sighed and shook her head again and for the slightest second I didn't think she'd answer me with something helpful, when her eyes were filled with something strange... pity? She pitied me? I didn't know what to think, so I didn't... She knew whatever Erik had in store for me, and clearly I didn't take the hint.

"I know he'll be out tomorrow during the afternoon. You may ask the man who works near the kitchen for him to drive you, and I will help you look for your cell phone, for I don't know where it is."

"Are you serious?" I asked, leaping from the chair, and felt the urge to go and wrap my arms around her and give a big hug.

"Yes," She nodded, "I'll help as much as I can, at least."

My heart began to flutter with excitement, "Thank you _so_ much!" I said happily, feeling so delighted that I would skip around this entire room.

_I was going to see Raoul again_! I repeated in my head over and over and no matter how many times I said it, the smile never left my face.

"The master would also ask for you to join him at dinner, and dear, I would suggest that you calm down slightly." She said quietly, moving toward me, raveling the blankets into her arms so much that it almost caused her to disappear in them with her quaint figure.

"I don't want to eat with him," I huffed, the thought beginning to disturb me even more.

"Miss, you don't know how much he cares for you. The least you can do, before betraying him, is have dinner with him." She sounded awfully concerned about him, seeing that she tensed as she left the room and I watched as she left, weighing the options in my head. I wasn't sure I could keep my splendid joy withheld in my chest, the sudden flutter of my heart when I thought of freedom... and for once I could go out like every teenager could, and I could go out with Raoul... And I would smile with him and laugh with him and remember what it was like when I was with my father and him.

I checked my expression in the mirror, fixing my hair, for it was obvious that I spent the last few hours laying on a bed for all its worth. I felt oddly buoyant for the first time in this house, like I was floating down the stairs.

I walked into the dining room with him already sitting there, reading the newspaper, actually looking normal for once. Him with the newspaper in hand made me remember that he was human... he wasn't some strange creature that shuts himself from the world in a large mansion.

"Good evening." He began invitingly. I didn't answer and sat down at the table, folding the napkin into my lap, glaring at him, to act like I did before wasn't so hard. The loathing I felt was something that wasn't very hard to mimic once more. "Won't you speak to me, Christine? What have I done to make you hate me so?" He asked pathetically, his voice reaching another pitch, and I looked up from the food again, glared, and took a bite of the salad.

"What _haven't_ you done?" I mocked.

"Now, now, don't be so ungrateful."

"Yes, but all my other homes let me see my friends. I'm not a recluse, you know... not like _you._" I hissed those last words, letting my fork fall for extra effect. That seemed to be his weak point, right there... If I brought himself into the situation, I noted that he backed off, finding it offending. He seemed to frown, for his mask went down a little, and he straightened up, as if not to act like that hurt him in such a way as I intended it to. He remained silent, seeing that I finally figured out a way to use his words against him effectively.

"At least I _gave _you a home, Christine. Would you like to be at the foster home and be looked down upon for the rest of your life? Not be able to go to college and be ignored, and scarcely fed? I'm sure they would be much more overprotective then I."

"Somehow I doubt that," I hissed acidly.

He said something under his breath and then looked down to the newspaper as if trying to read it, but I knew he was trying to concoct something else to say, but instead, ignored my comment.

"I'm going to be away tomorrow for most of the day, but will return late at night, possibly before you're asleep. I'm certain you'll be fine here?" Oh, now he was just begging for it.

"Not exactly."

He ignored that, too. "Very well." And he grunted and left the room. I smiled to myself, seeing that this was the perfect opportunity to go. I bet he thought I wouldn't be able to leave... I, for some reason, am quite sure of that, actually. Either that or he'll be predicting that, and leave just to see if I'll leave as well. The more excited I seemed to be of tomorrow, the more worried I became that he might catch me. I don't know what he's capable of... and I couldn't even begin to think of what he'll do if he actually is very angry that I left him. I wondered, looking back to when I was speaking to the maid, just how much she's actually going to do for me if things actually do take a turn for the worst. She pitied me... but just how much?

I don't think I'll be getting much sleep tonight...


	4. Vain Pleasure

**Yayy... this was fun. All the more intricate, eh? I was somewhat inspired when I was reading Phantom once more today (my second time) and I don't know what gave me over to the twisted thoughts of Erik today, but it felt good going through my fingers at midnight last night until whatever time it is now, (broken clock on the computer). Anyway, I hope you enjoy and let this arouse some suspicions. I love you all for reading and reviewing, it makes my day when I see one more number on the review thing, lets my heart race just a little and then the critique is the best! Cookies to you all!**

**~The Phantoms Flutist~**

**HAHA don't think you have a break from reviewing. Your reviews inspire me most of all. Tell me what you like and dislike, I'm always happy to hear. MERCI!**

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__Chapter 4:_

_Vain Pleasure_

And so, the time came when Erik left the house, giving me free will to the garden as if I cared. He bid me farewell, and left quickly and it made me think of what matters, exactly, that he is attending to... Well, right now I didn't care.

I walked down the stairs to meet the maid in the living room, who was joined by the same man who took in my bags all those days ago, who looked scared out of his mind, thus giving me the first clue of what Erik was like to them. But I couldn't bring myself to fear him just this minute, I made myself believe that I could find my cell phone easily, but as I came down the stairs, the looks in the expressions of the man and woman told me otherwise.

"He's suspicious, Christine," The maid began.

"Good for him," I shrugged it off, rolling my eyes, "I hope he's suspicious."

"Don't be so suicidal." I heard her murmur under her breath.

"I don't have much at risk." I replied hastily. "Now, where would the first place that we should look for it be?"

"You could check his upstairs office, he keeps many things up there." At that word, I almost immediately ran up the stairs and found myself opening doors that have been shut, and looking only quickly at the rooms until I reached the office that was described.

I guess I shouldn't be so stunned that the "office" really wasn't an office... it was more like... a step into something dark and twisted. There was books, of course, and there was a desk, and I could see why he meant for it to be an office, but that part of it wasn't touched. There was a nice layer of dust on top of the beautiful ebony desk, and the only light in the room was a lamp on the ground that was randomly connected to the wall.

"He doesn't really wanting us touching here, either." The maid said, sneaking up behind me, causing me to jump, and a hand clamped to my chest, as I gasped.

"Oh, pardon me," she said quietly, lifting a flashlight so that I could see. The glow of the flashlight revealed papers atop the desk, and from what I've seen, I believe they are blueprints to buildings. What I've learned from my dad, the blueprints looked very lavish, the intended buildings were to be brilliant... And I could expect nothing less from the man who claims to be my guardian, it was just a shame to see these fine things collecting dust. Curiously, I looked closer, to see the exact measurements, though I wouldn't know exactly what they were to be, but the handwriting was that of a child's, which indeed made me wonder.

"He did those when he was younger, I believe," The maid explained, resting her hand over them.

"Wow," I said quietly, raising my brows. I moved my hand over to find the drawers, and opened each and every one, finding only pencils and pens, rulers, compasses, and all the other sorts of tools that artists might use including stencils, paper, pastels...

What sort of architect keeps these sorts of things in his desk...? Unless... this was multi-purpose.

"Miss..." I began... "I'm sorry, I didn't get your name."

"You may call me Anne." She replied, sounding as though she was smiling.

"Miss Anne, then, could you hand that flashlight to me? I'm curious."

"I don't think he'd like you seeing this room..." She said in such a hushed tone.

"He doesn't want me to do a lot of things, and that's not holding me back. Please?"

"I'm saying this for your own sake. On the contrary, I don't believe you really don't want to see these things."

"Anne, I don't _want_ to be here."

"But-"

"_Please_!" I pleaded with as much finality as I could emphasize.

I heard her sigh loudly, "Don't say I didn't warn you, Christine..." She shakily handed me the flashlight and I took it in my victory, and held it firmly, snapping it on as I ran over the walls. They were bare, with the striped red and gold wallpaper that I've seen before in this house, except very deteriorated and worn... and I moved closer slowly, hearing by Anne's breathing that this may not be what I want to see. I let out a frightened shriek at what I came over...

It was my _own_ belongings, and they were either put on the wall or on the floor, things that I thought I simply lost over time, and things that I held dear and they somehow disappeared. For instance, my golden watch that glimmered brightly in the light. One of which I know is mine because my father had my name put on it when I was six years old that disappeared a while ago and now, it's here. What the hell did he want with this? I almost dropped the flashlight as I backed away.

"Oh, my God..." I whispered, to the point of crying in terror.

"I told you..." Anne mocked, shaking her head. "You don't listen at all, do you?"

"Anne... why does he have my stuff?"

"He'll have to explain it to you on his own accord, I don't believe I bare the right to." She said quietly.

I started out of the room, wanting to leave right when I get the cell phone and call Raoul. I wanted to leave and never come back. I gripped the sides of my chest, trying hard not to break down just yet, for I needed to still work.

"Did he even say that he took your cell phone?" Anne asked trying hard to cheer me up.

"I guessed." I said quickly, walking to my room with her just in case.

"You may never know... maybe you simply lost it."

"I could have." I hoped that much wasn't true. I had to suffer through finding out that much, I don't think I want to go much further. I didn't want to suffer through it without reason, and part of me didn't want this to be true at all. That somehow, he's been stalking me though all this time... Well, Lord knows how long. And I am even more terrified to find out.

She searched the top of my dresser and vanity, and I looked through my writing desk and my drawers. The search was fruitless, unfortunately, even as we searched everywhere that I would want to find it in. It took a good deal of time, but it only lasted until noon, which was fine.

But the rejection that my cell phone was nowhere to be found, I could have almost collapsed right there... Instead, I went to my room, and shut the door, crying into the pillow, and shut my eyes really hard, so hard a headache almost started. I looked to the side as I cried in the pillow, and looked at my nightstand...

And there it was. On... my nightstand. I grabbed it into my hands greedily, not even noticing the note that fell to the ground in a small envelope. How stupid I was. I thought that I shouldn't even read the note, that maybe I didn't want to know, but a small part of me said to go on and read it... simply to see what he might have to say that is too innocent for all that he has done.

_Dear Christine, _

_I long to please you in any way possible and make you comfortable. I do not wish for you to hate me. I can't go on without you speaking to me. Please, take this into consideration, for I want you to stay with me as long as possible, until you turn and meaningfully say that you despise me, after all I've done, w I let you go. You may have your cell phone back, but you may not leave this house. If you even bother,I will catch you and there will be strict punishment for you disobeyed me._

I crinkled the note in my hand and threw it to the small trash bin near my bed right when I read that last sentence. How hypocritical! He wanted me to be comfortable, yet he wouldn't let me see my best friend... What do I do now? I couldn't just sit here and fear him.

Anne picked up the crinkled note. "You should go anyway." She insisted quietly. "I'll have him blame it on me, he's being very stubborn."

"I suppose..." I replied slowly, and flipped open the phone, dialing Raoul's number. It rang once and he almost immediately picked it up.

"I don't want to talk to you, Christine." He said hurriedly.

"What? Why? Did I do something wrong?" I asked, feeling myself begin to nervously pace back and forth.

"First, you don't call me for four days, then you start sending my texts that... I didn't even know you had in you..."

"I didn't even_ have_ my phone! How could I text you without my phone?" I explained quickly, thinking of Erik.

It was silent on the other end for a while, and all I heard was his unsteady breathing. "I knew it wasn't you..." He said slowly.

"It wasn't! I swear! Listen, my guardian, he's very strange... He took my phone away because he didn't want me to see you. I'm trying to escape for a while, you see, and I was wondering if you wanted to go out to eat while I have my freedom. He's going to kill me, but I _really_ want to see you."

He sighed, and I could almost feeling him debate. He would have always accepted it right away even if he had other plans... What was wrong? "You don't have to go around your other plans if you don't want to, Raoul..."

"No, I'll go. How about I pick you up and we'll go to that new Cafe Normandy?"

"So expensive..." I sighed knowing I didn't have any source of money except for Erik, and that was bad planning, on my part, to make Raoul pay for it.

"You know that I'll pay for all of it, Christine," he laughed lightly, just the sound that I wanted to hear.

"I don't... have any money so I'm dreadfully sorry and I could pay you back whenever I see you again?"

"You don't need to do that! It's fine." He responded with concern.

"Also, I don't know where this house is, so I'd just meet you there?"

"Is 6:30 alright with you?"

"6:30 is fine. I'll see you there." I smiled.

"Until then, love." He answered with that handsome tone that I always blushed with. I remember he once used it in front of my father, and he just shooed it off with his hand, not caring so much. He had high respects for Raoul...

"We'll leave at 6:00 then?" Anne asked from the opposite side of the room, in the chair. "The master may be home shortly after, so grant, you must not have so much time before he starts looking for you."

I gulped... "You think he'd hunt me down like that?"

"I'm sure he'll do anything."

"Well, I can leave earlier, then. I just want to see him for a little while, and maybe we could be back in time before he is home."

"Then I wish you the best of luck..." She sighed. I looked at the worried expression on her face and sighed.

"Are you sure you can cover for me? I don't want him to harm you."

"He won't harm me, Christine. I've known him too long, I know almost everything about him and he's very much so a gentleman. He won't pull violence off in front of women. Now, men on the other hand..." She shivered, as if a sudden chill came into the room.

"Oh," I replied in a whisper.

"Don't let that stop you," She replied, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Thanks," I said sincerely.

"Don't mention it... and I mean it... don't mention it." She laughed nervously.

"I won't." I assured her, looking back to her caring brow.

"I trust you have a proper outfit and all the things you need to get ready." She said opening the closet door as she walked by.

"I'm sure it's all good." I smiled and she left the room to my own thoughts. I went into the closet excitedly, looking through the assorted skirts and dresses all laid out in my closet. I picked out the one that was not too low-cut and not too short... obviously Erik thought I had _that _sort of self-preservation or lack-of.

I finally settled with a dark blue dress that had a halter top that went low on my back which wasn't too revealing, and went with dark blue sandals that had slightly a heel to make me feel somewhat taller. I smiled contentedly when I put the dress in front of me.

By the time I finished reading my book, taken a shower, and gotten dressed, it was near 6 o'clock and I began to worry out of nerves. Anne insisted to not even worry, and I did so anyway, trying to settle my thoughts on finally seeing Raoul.

The man who had greeted me evidently was named Thomas, with a French accent (evidently he's French as well) and we conversed in the language after I only took it for three years in high school, surprisingly remembering it. He helped me into the black sports car, and my father didn't have enough interest in cars to name off them to me, so I couldn't exactly put a name on it, just that it was expensive and looked fast.

I looked out the window, seeing how long Erik's driveway actually is, surrounded by trees and shrubbery that seemed to block out all the light of day, and drain it to all its worth. I watched out the window and it seemed like forever until we eventually reached the highway, to where the driveway was hidden to any unknown driver, almost as if it comes out of nowhere, in a way.

We drove for about a half hour down multiple highways and roads that were unknown to me. We reached the small town that the cafe was in, which, to me, was very cute and old. It was stationed next to a quaint harbor with petite boutiques and clothing stores, along with a good deal of small book stores and cafes, but the most were not as expensive looking as the one that had the sign that stated Cafe Normandy in the front.

He parked on the curb near the restaurant and promised to be there at 7:30, and I nodded and waved him off, looking over the heads of people to find a blond head.

He was there, in a dark blue button-up shirt and expensive-looking slacks, and his collar was primped up, looking aristocratic like his father and brother. He looked so much older than he was when I last saw him, his chin more defined and his cheekbones more prompt, but still with that boyish light in him.

"Raoul!" I exclaimed, and ran into his arms right when I saw him, catching him surprise by just barely running him over. "Oh, my God! You're so tall!" I said looking up, as he smiled down, his blue eyes were sparkling in the dim light of the afternoon.

"And you've grown up! Wow, look at you!" He said, his voice deeper and less high-pitched , pulling me close so my face was in his chest which smelt of cologne. I felt like I could cry, I was in so much exuberant joy and relief, being in his arms felt like nothing could harm me, just as I thought it would, his hands pulled my face closer to his.

"I'm so sorry about that whole... disconnection sort of thing. My guardian is sort of... well, 'sort of' being an improper word for it, but _extremely_ overprotective and controlling. I basically escaped behind his back..." I sighed, shaking my head, my throat feeling swollen in my chest.

"I never actually believed it as much as I didn't want to. I've missed you lots, Christine," he said my name, though it wasn't as beautiful as when Erik says it, except it was with such sweetness that I would rather Erik say it like that.

"You have _no_ idea how much I've missed you. Moving from house to house kills me inside... especially now when I have such a freaky guardian."

"He sounds like a creep." He noted, furrowing his brow with concern.

"Tell me about it," I rolled my eyes, and sighed heavily."Well, I haven't ate since breakfast, I've been too nervous that I wouldn't pull this off."

"Shall we?" He asked and outstretched his arm for me to take, and I nodded, letting him link our arms as he opened the door and let me in. I wanted to forget what's happened to me this last week, what I've seen today, and the masked man and the big mansion just for a little while and be an actual teenager going out with her boyfriend because it seems that I skipped _every_ part of being a teenager. Including high school, and friends and having a mother I could look up to and follow and go shopping with. A tear fell down my cheek, and I wiped it away before it smudged my eyeliner and mascara.

"How many?" The young waitress asked.

"Table for two, please." Raoul answered, smiling down to me.

"Follow me," The waitress replied and waved us over and I followed Raoul to a table near the window that was adorned with flowers and a vine that grew over the window with satin curtains. Raoul raised his eyebrows at me as he sat me down at the bench, and sat on the chair across from me, he kept his hands in mine.

"I think you became more beautiful over these too-long years," He said lightly, looking into my eyes with his bright blue eyes that stun me every time I look at them.

I blushed vibrantly, not able to peel my eyes away.

"What can I get you to drink?" The waitress, breaking up our moment, and it only caused me to blush even more.

"I'll have hot tea." I said, and looked to Raoul.

"Water," he replied, and the waitress nodded and went off.

"So... how's your family company going along? Are you still working with your brother as a mentor?"

"It's been rough working with family, but yes, we've pulled along. I've been studying economics in senior year so that's helped as well."

"That's great!" I replied enthusiastically. "How's Philippe, though? Still just as geeky as always?"

He laughed lightly, "Yes, possibly more. He's walking in our father's steps, and everything is good in our family... I seem to be the outcast."

"Aw, don't say that..." I smiled.

"No, it's true. I'm the youngest, so it's all 'natural' as my mom said." He made little air quotes, looking silly and I couldn't help but laugh because it felt good.

The waitress brought around our drinks and I felt stupid because I didn't even begin to look at the menu underneath my arm, I was too distracted and flustered with so many things running through my mind. It was fine, I guess, because Raoul did the same thing, laughing under his breath, noticing the same thing.

"I suppose you two need more time to decide on your meal. Would you like an appetizer?"

"No, thanks, we'll... decide," he looked at me and laughed again, and I smiled, picking up the menu and leaned into my chair. The waitress let out a disgruntled sigh and walked away briskly.

"You distract me," I sighed.

"And you don't distract me?" He laughed once more.

"I wouldn't think that." I noted, looking through the list of foods except that I wasn't actually looking at it. I picked something at random without looking at it... some version of fillet mignon, I supposed, I really couldn't care less about fish, for it was something I was craving for no particular reason, and he placed his menu down at almost the same time, smiling dumbly.

"What?" I asked, tilting my head to the side, and he shook his head, still smiling like that, about to crack up laughing.

"Nothing."

"Raoul..." I whined, tapping his hand, annoyed.

"It's just that you're as fickle as ever..."

"Fickle, am I?" I batted my lashes playfully.

"In the most strangest way, yes." He shrugged, and then looked to me with more sincerity. "By the way, tell me more of this guardian of yours..."

I shrugged, thinking it best not to have him worry too much over me, though I was worried. I felt choked up for the first time with him, pretending I was looking at the menu again so he wouldn't see my expression.

"He's... strange, as I said. Rich and overprotective."

"You say this like it's a bad thing."

"You saw what he did with my phone! Coming in with my privacy for that... there should be some rules or something over this whole thing, at least on the contract." I sighed, shaking my head, bringing my forehead into my hands.

"You look uncomfortable talking about him." He noted suspiciously.

"I am... It's like he's_ right _there when he said he went out for _errands_ today, and Lord know what he's doing right now that include in the word _errand_. It's like he's _always_ watching

"That's really frightening."

I nodded, as the waitress came by, and looked at us expectantly. "Are you ready to order?"

"I'll have the _ratatouille_." Raoul said, handing her the menu.

"Coq au vin, _s'il vous plait_," I smiled and handed the menu to the waitress as she took the menus.

"Still into French, are we?" He a

"Opera, actually. A French _opera. Faust_ to be exact, therefore it's only wise to add some prior knowledge to the aria." I noted quickly, forgetting to add that one detail. "Oh... my guardian gives me voice lessons. He's a brilliant musician, actually, extremely beautiful." I emphasized.

"Is that why you're staying there out of all of it? Five houses and you stay in this one?"

"I don't think I'd stay only because of lessons, Raoul, it's just that I'll be forced to move to a foster home with all the other teen rejects... my father would have never wanted that. He's always been wanting me to have former lessons as well through my career in theater, so I don't think he wants me to leave this house, either..." I trailed away thoughtfully, looking out the window to the harbor. My eyes trailed along the dark harbor, the light seeming swept from it, with only the dimness of the old light posts, and the haunted ships out in sea. And then, there was a tree. A tree that seemed to have the little light there was left drained out of it. Through the thick branches there seemed to be two stars that were cast out. Two stars out of the whole sky were cast out... which made me think that they weren't stars. A figure stood there... I blinked a few times and shook my, head and looked to that same tree again and it was still there, unmoving.

"Raoul, do you see that?" I asked quietly.

"What are you looking at?" He asked, and I pointed to the tree in the distance, and he looked over and squinted.

"It could be a glare on the window," He leaned to another angle, and furrowed his brow curiously, "Or maybe not."

"That's strange..." I muttered, and just as I said that, something inside my small purse began to vibrate in my lap.


	5. Fear

**I've been so bored today *ugh*... I couldn't help it but update again, I feel addicted to this story that I simply must go on and on...**

Read and Review and all that jazz that you usually do. I can't say thanks enough, for all it does is persuade me to keep writing, and I just love seeing that people are actually reading *squeal*

~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 5:  
Fear_

"Excuse me, Raoul... for a second." I reached into my purse to grab my phone which had an unknown number on the screen once more. With a shaking hand, I pressed the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" My voice was barely a whisper, it was more like a cry.

"Step away from him now." A demanding and cold voice said into the phone, and I almost dropped the phone, looking out the window fearfully that he might just pop up there like in horror movies. I looked to Raoul and mouthed "Excuse me" and backed away from the table, going through the columns of tables, in my peripheral vision, glimpses of curious eyes watching me as I went to the waiting area with the benches.

"Who is this?" I asked slowly, trying not to break down in front of the waiters in fear they might begin to ask questions and I wouldn't have a very great time explaining... It would be like explaining a tantrum in the middle of the apartment store at 4-years-old.

"You know who this is, Christine. You've disobeyed me and I warned you strictly you could not see him. Now, retrieve your purse and step outside."

"Erik, you're taking this too far, I beg of you..." I murmured into the phone, trying not to cry.

"You have done enough! Do as I say or I fear for your little sweetheart."

"Don't you even think about harming him!" I hissed into the phone, "You sent those nasty text messages to him beforehand which was uncalled for and horrible of you... why are you _doing _this to me?" I rasped into the phone, holding my chest for support.

"Christine!" I heard a more kinder voice say, and I looked up to find Raoul coming toward me. I put the phone against my chest and tried hard not to cry as I looked into his eyes.

"Raoul, I have to go. I'll try to see you again, okay? Can you... can you fetch my purse, please?" I sobbed a little, rubbing my eyes. He stood there, dumbfounded.

"Christine-"

"Please..." I begged, "_please_..."

He nodded and walked off back to the table that I saw already had our food prepared and sent to it. Walking back awkwardly, he handed me my purse, and grabbed my arm and helped me from the chair. He shrank helped me shrink out of the window and I found myself sitting on the bench again, the phone falling to the ground.

He held my chin up to him, letting me have one glimpse of his perfection, "Try as much as I'll try, Christine. I love you so much," He whispered, and clutched my chin firmer, leaning forth, and he pressed his lips upon mine, and I was floating for the slightest second. It wasn't awkward, it wasn't silly, and we weren't on a dance floor. He was kissing me as maturely and as passionately as anyone else, and I could be frozen there for ages and never want to be grabbed out of it. But it ended, and I was awakened back to the bleak pace of time like a slap of cold water upon my face.

At that moment, I was crying because he seemed to break my walls down simply to reach me... he broke them down more gently, and he clutched my arm with urgency. I shut it on Erik, and put it into my purse, feeling a little relieved now that the trivial conversation was through with. I hid my mouth in my hand, letting the tears fall over it.

"I'm scared, Raoul..." I whispered, slowly rising from my seat, and I turned from him, opened the cafe doors and walked outside, feeling stripped away and exposed just at the breakaway from his protective arms.

I didn't see the black car waiting for me, and long arms seemed to reach out, taking me by my hand and pulling me painfully into the car, and before I even had time to blink, the car was moving. But it was so _dark_... it was such a blur through my tears.

"Why do you do this?" I asked, already knowing it was Erik with the sudden chill that went through my bones adding onto the recent slap in the face of reality making myself very uncomfortable.

"You disobeyed me, and went against my wishes for you not to see him."

"Why could I not see him? Are you _jealous_ of him?"

"He doesn't deserve you, Christine." His words seemed to hammer me down in disbelief. I didn't _actually_ think he was jealous, I was simply putting it rhetorically. That it wasn't extreme parental behavior I was facing from someone who I barely knew and hides his face behind a mask.

"..._What_?" I asked, though it hardly sounded like a word.

"Put your seatbelt on." He demanded from beside me, as lights began to pass by like a slur of color and darkness mixed together like the art of a Picasso painting. I obeyed, seeing that we were on some sort of highway that was unfamiliar... I didn't want him killing me or something.

There was something in my ear that was soft, something beautiful and melodic, it seemed to pass toward my ear like a cloud of sound, or a gentle wave. I couldn't tell what it was, but it was so soothing that I suddenly felt drowsy, as if it were trying to lull me into falling asleep. I tried hard to beat the sudden phase that swept over me, but it was difficult, it was like trying to crack open an iron wall that fell before me.

I shut my eyes, after a few groans of unconscious rebellion, I fell into the deepest sort of sleep I've ever known.

I awoke laying on my bed in the home, still feeling still a bit drowsy and utterly confused. It seemed all I could remember was kissing Raoul and being pulled into a dark abyss... Which somehow didn't make any sense now that I was awake and pondering about it. I was back in my prison and I had to be dragged by my hands and ankles back to Hades' layer.

I searched the room, suddenly aware that I was still laying in the bed with my dress on and shoes off which were lying by the door when I turned my head. I blinked a few times, finding that it was early morning and I had no idea how long I slept.

I looked around the room once more, finding my purse taken from me, and the sudden fear swept over me. He took it back, of course. Well, dammit. I was defeated once more at my unconscious lagging. My eyes went about the room and stopped at he chair near the door where Erik was sitting, his chin in his hands, as if looking somewhat bored and he was staring right at me. I wanted to shrivel away and curl into the covers, hiding my head, and go back to the dream world I was just recently in, but it was too real. The light from the sun was drained onto his usual black attire, looking like something of a ghost with such a confused existence.

"Leave me alone," I whimpered, sounding like a hurt puppy, turning away and biting into my pillow, squinting my eyes hard as if the ghost might just go _poof_ in thin air. _No such thing was going to happen, Christine, get out of it!_"I didn't think you'd actually leave, you know." Erik's voice was deeply thoughtful, as if restating some sort of story in his own opinion. "Just maybe you'd have the right amount of logic that you'd already know that you can't escape me." He said just as thoughtful as before, but now with a mocking edge to it, making me want to throw my pillows at him and scream at him with all the abuse I'd ever have, with the knowledge I had, I was sure I didn't want to.

"Did you drug me or something?" I asked quietly.

"No," he mused.

"Then... why did everything I remember have some sort of hole there? I fell asleep, but how?"

"You're very curious, aren't you? I sang to you thus you fell asleep." He said, explaining it as if he were speaking to a five-year-old.

I rose from my face plastered on the pillow to face him dead-on, his eyes speculating my every move, and it began to bother me.

"I want to leave. I want to call Mrs. Giry and have her take me to that damned foster home. Please, I just want some dignity..." I was somehow now begging him with thoughts I didn't want him to hear.

"I'm afraid you can't do that." He directly said.

"Why not?" I asked, my voice rising as I glared at him.

"You've just began to know what I can do for you, Christine. You can't leave me yet." He sounded... in a way, childish suddenly. Not even Raoul would have sounded like that. That only made me more angry.

"All you've done is have me fear... I've never been so scared in my life." And why did I just say that? Why am I telling him that I fear him? I'm not sure but that seems just wrong.

"I don't want you to fear me, Christine. I care for you very much, and I would never,_ ever_ harm you." It seemed like he was begging me not to feel as I do.

"You've failed." I commented dryly, glowering, "You've harmed me in the most unimaginable way that I never knew I could _feel_..." I muttered thoughtfully, looking up, "And, you know what else? I don't think I've ever_ hated_ a person more than I've hated you." I never knew my tone could be so cold.

"Oh, Christine..." It sounded like someone besides Erik said these words, for it broke up into little shards of glass on the floor before my feet and he was fetching me to step onto them, and wrong move and I could bleed and shatter them further... his voice was _that_ delicate, he hunched over just as broken as his voice was. "Christine, no, no... I've never wanted for you to be that way. I'm so _sorry_... so _sorry..._" He was coming closer to me now, his hand outstretched, to press against my cheek as he would to calm me before now, but I only grabbed it before it reached my face and stared at it as if it could jump out and devour my face whole. "I would give you anything for you to forgive me. _Anything_..."

"Are you serious?" I asked, raising my brows and stiffening, still holding his hand as he gripped my own hand tighter. I was honestly waiting for him to say "no" in my face and then burst out in laughter, but it took him a while... I think I saw something like a tear drip down the side of his mask.

"I have my restrictions," He whispered so quietly and I glared even more, trying to get my hand out of his, but failed once more.

"Like what?" I raised my voice just a little, seeing I already broke something. I wasn't winning at this game...

"Name what you desire to know, and I shall let you know," He said so quietly I barely heard him.

"I want answers." I said briskly, "I want answers and I'd like them honestly and with the entire truth. If this whole thing is built up of lies, I'd like to know before it shatters."

It took him an awful long time to respond, for it was all silent and it began to make me wonder what all he was thinking.

"It depends, I won't answer all of them." He answered slowly.

"Let me see your face." I said almost instantly, looking at his mask idly.

"That asks too much, Christine. I'll answer every other question, but not that one, that's not even a question."I believe that was the most insecure answer I've ever heard.

I grimaced, and finally got my hand out of his. I thought for a second and then opened my mouth to say something, but then shut it, still glaring.

"Why do you have my things?" I asked softly.

"You weren't supposed to see that." He answered dully, looking away in worry.

"You hid most of the house from me and I live here now, as you say..."

"I _told_ you to stay away, now your curiosity leads you to this point!"

"I want to know why, not be lectured for the thousandth time." I hissed, coldly and shook my head, massaging my temples, "I just want answers, Erik, that's all I ask of you now."

He looked at me as if trying to study something, but then lightened his eyes in such a way that is bewildered me. Only _Raoul_ ever looked at me like that, his eyes squinting, almost, and it was like it was out of adoration.

_"He doesn't deserve you, Christine_,_"_ were his exact words to me last night, and that should have gave me the first clue that he doesn't _just_ care for me a little too much.

He sighed, seeing I saw what he meant without even a bit of a direct answer. _"_I _love_ you, Christine," he sounded childish once more, as if admitting he stole something to his mother. Raoul never sounded like that, either, his words had me aghast and in almost immediate disbelief, but the sincerity that he had when he said those words, it wasn't like he's never said them before.

It was a good long time when I was simply staring at him, watching him watching me about my reaction.

"And..." He began again, in my mind I wanted him to not say anything more... I do not want to hear whatever he had to say now. I wanted to cover my ears, "I hope that... just one day you may come to love me back, whatever that may take. Just... one day..."

I didn't think I could say anything more, and I was staring. I don't believe I felt the same. Not after all he's done to me, taken away society, and caused me to fear.

"How long have you been watching me?" I asked, trying to break the awkward moment with another burning question. He was now sitting at the edge of my bed.

"A month before your father died." He answered honestly and my heart began to thud.

"How did you find me?" I pressed, trying not to linger on his strange answer.

"I search for promising talent, you see, and you were in that musical with the community theater, and I saw you there with your voice... I longed to help you, but I couldn't seem to reach you. When your father died, you disappeared from my sight, and I couldn't find you until I found you were looking for a new home, I was more than happy to take you in." I tried to remember all of it, when I was in a production of_ Annie_ as one of the older orphans with a cast of younger kids because that was as high as I could manage. I wasn't tall, or mature-looking quite yet, so despite the director's wishes of age, I was cast a year older than the requested age, and evidently, I astounded... My eyes were probably the size of a quarter, wide and speculating, but he was telling the truth, I think...

"Okay," I nodded thoughtfully. I _really _didn't want to know more, but I knew this all along. "You were stalking me?"

"I wouldn't consider it stalking." He said firmly.

"Then what was it? _Casually following_?" I faked a laugh, leaning my head into my hands, shaking my head. "Whatever..." I began, speaking into my hands. "If you wanted to help me before, then why didn't you just come out and ask?"

"Did you not see yourself after your father died? I didn't want to harm you or scare you because you were so fragile and easily _breakable_, it's obvious-"

"No, no, it's not _obvious_..." I sniffed. "I don't understand..."

"You wouldn't." He answered briskly.

"Then I'm... not going to ask."

"You shouldn't," he sounded as if he was winning something.

"You're weird..." I sighed, wrapping my arms around my folded legs. "Don't blame Anne for last night, it was my idea." I begged.

"I know it was," He nodded, "We've... handled it while you were sleeping."

"Handled it?"

"She didn't _drive_ you..."

"Thomas didn't do anything, either... It's not their fault for anything!"

"We've set rules down, it's all taken care of. You're not to worry for their sake, or for yours, as a matter of fact." He said before I could say anything more, he raised a long, bony finger to silence me from asking another question.

"What kind of rules?"

"Since you didn't take advantage of roaming the ground yesterday, I assume you don't need it. Therefore, you are not to leave the house without my consent and my willingness to let you out."

"That's not fair!"

"You'll learn, if you haven't already, that life isn't fair. Now, I'll let you know the other rules after breakfast. I'm sure you're hungry."

"I don't want to eat with you," I hissed.

He rose up immediately, raising his arm as if he could have backlashed right then, and I looked to him, suddenly consumed in fear he would hit me just because I didn't want to ear with him, and he eased.

"Very well." He answered tensely, and walked out of the room with a burden, slamming the door behind him. I heard the lock click. Panic was urgent, I ran instantly to the door and began to hit the door, slamming my body against it and trying so hard to unlock it no matter how much it wasn't going to go.

"Erik! No! You can't do this! Let me out! Please, just let me out! I don't want to be in here!" I screamed through the door.

"You really should save your voice, darling," he said furtively through the door. "This is your punishment for disobeying me."

"Erik!" I whined one more time, helplessly banging on the door and I slid down it slowly, taking my head into my hands and sobbing.

I remained like that for a while, working my way to my bed, and laying, everything stretched out until there was a sudden knock on the door. I leaped up, looking to the door which revealed Anne carrying a tray with a pitiful look on her face.

"I'm sorry," she said almost immediately.

"It's my fault..."

"I'm the one that convinced you," she admitted dramatically, outstretching her arms to take me in them. I let her embrace me, feeling drained of any emotion that I could harness right now. She placed the tray on a small folding table with a glass of hot tea.

"Anne!" Erik's voice roared from downstairs.

"He knows I'm talking to you," She shook her head, and pouted. "He told me you'll be in here until tomorrow, so I'll deliver your meals, and _try_ to give you company until he lets you out."

"He's treating me like an animal, Anne..."

"He had his reasons, Christine, you'll understand over time. Just... whatever you do to understand him, do _not_ touch his mask. I'm warning you now."

"I don't know what to do, then." I sighed, bringing the dish closer grabbing he fork and taking up the spaghetti, just realizing how starving I was.

"I'll see you in the morning." She waved and left me alone in my room that feels not like a luxurious and brilliant room, it now feels like a chamber with the walls closing on me on all four sides, as I sit here and pity myself... I felt as if I died the world might not just care. I don't think I've ever been lonelier in my life.


	6. Horror, Horror, Horror!

_Chapter 6:  
Horror, Horror, Horror!_

"Good morning, Christine," awoke me from a nightmarish sleep that left me breathing hard when I was awake.

I groaned, stuffing my head into the pillow, turning away from the opened window with the sun shining through into my cage of a room.

"Master Erik requests that you have breakfast early so that you may come downstairs earlier and he requests that you have your lesson in an hour."

"Tell him that I refuse to speak with him."

"Christine, he only wants for you to hear him out." Anne was holding onto the material of her shirt nervously, her brow furrowed, I can see that she was trying very hard to convince me. I didn't want her to suffer more of Erik's wrath. I looked from her to the plate that was being offered, and then to my hands letting my messy hair fall over my vision of the world.

"Fine," I muttered, taking the plate of pancakes and scrambled eggs into my lap, and began to knife through them after pouring a little syrup over the pancakes.

"He loves you, you know." She muttered, watching me eat.

"I wish I didn't have to hear that again."

"I know," She nodded, and backed out of the room, "if you need anything, call me." She let the door shut behind her, this time I didn't hear the lock click as she shut the door, and I closed my eyes, quickly praying that I wouldn't have to hear that wretched sound again. I ate my food slowly, hoping that it would only make Erik mad if anything if I wasn't down there directly at 12, for I still had to take my shower and the time was now 11:30.

I put my dishes back on the small table and picked out an outfit to wear, finding the new wardrobe very useful, not all of it was something I'd like to wear, but it was nice to have a selection to choose from.

I walked into the bathroom to find new towels hanging, as if they popped out of nowhere during the night. I shuddered and resumed with taking my shower.

I walked out of the bathroom feeling very refreshed and ready to withstand anything that was about to happen to me. I walked down the stairs to see Erik awaiting me with his head bent and was reading a book in his hands, his legs crossed, and he looked normal once again. It was like it was some sort of mood thing- when to act human and when to not. It seems to get very annoying.

I stood for a second, studying him again, for even the way he sat down was graceful and livid, his eyes sweeping over the pages, increasingly interested. He didn't even look up when I went down the stairs.

"Good morning." His voice surprised me, as if it came from right behind me.

I grimaced and remained silent, thinking back over all the things he's done, and my hatred only grew. Which was a pity, considering he thought he loved me.

"Christine..." he began, looking up to me, as if just realizing that I wasn't going to speak to him. "You're being childish, again. The cold shoulder will not affect me."

I dropped my gaze to my hands as they folded over each other by my waist, not wanting to look at him. It was the most awkward between us as it's ever been now that he's said he "loves" me. I would have never guessed it. Well, maybe I could have. I mean, a rich man allowing me to stay in his home as I was an orphan, giving me more things then I could have never have even wished for.

"I just don't understand you." I whispered, more to myself as I sat down across from him on the chair, sitting up straight and tense.

"I apologize, Christine."

"You say that a lot." I noted blankly. He didn't reply again, pretending he was looking at his book.

"Would you like to start your lesson now?"

I looked up and thought about it for a while, tilting my head from side to side, "Yes." I answered quietly, wondering how he even heard me it was so quiet.

He rose with spectacular and feline grace as he put the book back on the shelf, and put a finger out to signal me to follow, and I did. Just as we were walking something furry passed through my legs and I let out a startled cry, looking down to see a Siamese cat.

Erik turned around and looked down. I lightened up, though the startle seemed to release a few beats of my heart, and I knelt down to pet the cat.

"Careful, I'm not sure how she reacts to strangers." Erik said cautiously.

"Since when did you have a cat?" I asked, smiling to myself as I pet the soft kitten as it played with my fingers.

"I've had Ayesha for a while, it's only just now that she chooses to show herself."

Suddenly, the cat hissed and rolled back onto its feet and ran off. I just now remembered that most cats hate me for no reason. "And she's very rude." He laughed lightly, for it was the first time in such a long time that I've heard him laugh, and it sounded like music, just as his voice was, except it wasn't used in horrible ways. It was just a _laugh_. A simple, and lighthearted laugh that astounded me.

I rose back to my feet, watching the cat disappear into the darkness of the hallway. I looked to see the same door that was still opened from two nights ago...

"Why did you take my things?" I asked suddenly, as it came into my mind.

"I don't think I have an answer to that," He answered simply, and subtly that I barely heard him as he let me walk into the music room and he followed, walking over to the piano as usual. I followed more reluctantly than usual.

We began the lesson as usual, with breathing exercises and scales, with solfege and then he handed me the piece of music to sing that I've been working on for a while. For some reason, this entire lesson, I felt that I couldn't keep my eyes on the music, instead, I was looking at him as he moved while playing the music, shutting his eyes, rocking back and forth in sync with the music. He looked at peace for once when I see him. I was so entranced by his movement and his mask that I didn't notice when he stopped playing the piano and I stopped singing.

"Christine?" He asked.

"..."

"Christine! Start at the second verse... One, two, three and..." He started again, and I almost had to pinch myself to peel away from my fascination. I began when he directed, starting it all over, this time he wasn't with the music necessarily, he had his eyes open, and listening.

"Christine!" He said again, this time losing patience. I stood back with a gasp, snapped out of it once more. "Where's the emotion that you had before? Try again... think of all the things you love and sing... This women is telling of the man of whom she loves very dearly for, but he is gone... Now, try again from the beginning. One, two, three and," He directed with an elegant unfurl of his hand. His hands seemed to only lightly tap the piano keys to have them play for him, as if he was working the piano with a gentle nudge and the most wonderful sound came from within it.

I shut my eyes to get away, and I opened my mouth and began to sing. Some part in me wanted very much to impress him. I thought of Raoul and how I may never see him again, I thought of my father who is dead and my mother who I barely knew. Of my friends I'll never see again... and I sang as I've never sang before without looking at the music, taking it all in to my mind.

It went by too quick, for the last chord was over, and I opened my eyes to the world I was in. "That was much better, dear." He sounded regretful, looking over the music, and then to me. I didn't have anything to say... I just wanted to go through that again.

"I have a new piece that may be a little more difficult, but it's a duet that I thought you may enjoy singing." He reached over to hand me another piece of music. He began to play the beginning from it and began to _sing_ and it seemed that I completely forgot how _beautiful_ he sang, and when he sang it was like he meant _every_ word he sang. I used my Italian knowledge, looking over the lyrics, and it seemed to choke me up inside that it was a love song. And this is why he picked it out.

Before I knew it, he was looking at me cautiously. "Are you alright, Christine? You look as thought you are about to pass out?"

"I-I'm fine..." I shook my head. So what? It's a lesson! Screw your head back on, Christine... he doesn't mean for it to be nothing more than experience.

"I trust you looked over it, then. Let's begin, I have the first verse." he instructed, and he sang again, and queued me in to begin to sing. It was truly remarkable as we sang, his godly voice rising and falling as mine, which was not-so-godly went with it with different words and different sayings in Italian. He looked to me as we sang, and he played the piano, and looked back.

I felt as if I was giving my own false word, though, and he was singing it as if giving his downright truth... My blood seemed to drain from my face and I felt like I was falling backward, but I was still standing, just not singing.

"Erik," I began, breathlessly, "Can we stop for today?" I asked, and he played a nasty chord on the piano causing me to shudder instantly.

"Are you alright?" He asked, almost looking panicked for my sake. I waved him off.

"Yes, just feeling a little lightheaded... that's it." I said, feeling like I should apologize but I couldn't bring myself to. I put a hand against my forehead to go along with my story, but I only really wanted to get out of this room, feeling like I couldn't listen to one more thing about love in fear I could explode. He picked those songs on _purpose_. I would be angry, but that would cause him to suspect more things.

"I suppose we could resume tomorrow..." He sighed, sounding disappointed. Maybe I imagined it, I couldn't tell what was real and what was not anymore, actually. It was like I was floating without being pulled down to earth with his music.

"I think I'm going to go read," I said quietly, gathering myself, handing him the music and I began to walk out of the room. When his voice sounded to be cautious.

"Wait, Christine!" He fetched, and I stayed there, frozen until he gave me a reason to be unfrozen.

"I didn't mean for you to feel... uncomfortable..." I didn't wait to hear what else he had to say, I dashed out of the room without another glance over my shoulder.

I went to the library to my regular seat and picked up _Great Expectations_, and began to read the first line,_ My father's family name being..._And from there, it seemed as if I sunk back into high school times as a freshman, and we had to read this book. I felt that I could really get into this book without having to be put on task and mechanically read it because my teacher ordered me to. And Raoul would be right behind my back, passing notes consistently. _No,_ I told myself, _you're only harming yourself_. I seemed to be so into the book with the only sound in my ear being the crackling of the fire and my own steady breathing, I fell into the world of the book, just as I could have always done say if I had such time as I do now.

I found myself sliding into the chair that my feet dangled off the opposite arm that my back was leaned up against. In such a position that I could be easily startled out of. "It's time to eat," Announced Erik from across the room, and I almost fell out, and it was instantly that Erik's long bony arms were there to catch me before I hit the ground, the book falling to the floor with a loud _thud_.

I blushed tomato red at my awkward position in his arms, looking to his masked face, and smiled dumbly. "You really shouldn't pop in and out of nowhere like that. I could have broken something." I said dryly, wiping my stupid grin from my face as Erik helped me to my feet with his cold hands. He didn't say anything, as I picked up the book, and I began to fly through the pages, looking for where I left off. I looked around for my makeshift bookmark that was a piece of ribbon I found somewhere. "Where'd it go?" I asked myself, looking about myself and turned to see Erik holding it in front of me the entire time. I glared and grabbed it out of his hand. "Thanks." He resumed not saying anything and I still searched through the book.

"Christine, your dinner will be cold." He pressed dryly.

"Hold on, I have to find my page..." I angrily shot back coldly, looking through the book hurriedly.

"You have the rest of the night." He rushed, reaching for the book in my hands and successfully grabbed it.

"But it'll take me forever to find the page again and I might forget it. Give it back!" I reached up and fought for it, waving my arms, and I felt something smooth hit my hand, and, my eyes that could not meet with his were drawn near the floor where his mask fell to the ground.

I looked up instantly, and saw his face... I _saw_ his face! A burning scream rose into my throat, and I covered my mouth, screeching, and fell backward. Oh, horror, horror... _horror_!

His face was that of any ordinary man after he's been dead five or six years. His cheeks were sunken in along with the expressionless eyes, that seemed extremely shocked in disbelief. I muffled another shriek, looking at his face and finding there_ was a hole where the nose should be_! I don't think I've seen anything more horrible.

Instinctively, I began to crawl away on all fours, my body aching all over and my heart beating into my throat. I hid my face in my arms that were quickly grabbed with his long fingers, seeming to completely wrap around my arms once, and using his strength that overpowered my own, he forcefully pulled me to my feet, and pressed me closer to him with both of my hands up.

"Damn you! LOOK!" He screamed in my face as I shut my eyes, "Dammit, Christine, LOOK! You _wanted_ to see, now_ SEE_! Feast your eyes! Glut your soul on my accursed ugliness! OPEN YOUR EYES!" I shrank up in his arms as if I could somehow get out of his grasp by doing so. He was hurting my arms! It felt as though I couldn't feel my hands anymore, and I obeyed automatically, opening my eyes and having a closer view of the Death's head! His skin was stretched like drum skin over his head, that any further it may break, and scars from sometime else were covering from chin up and on his forehead... the only possible human feature about him were his ears and the small black locks of hair that was scattered on his head.

I couldn't help but scream again. It seemed to all pass by in a blur from there, his eyes... his eyes told me more things than he was saying, shouting curse words at me as he moved my hands over his sunken cheeks, having my hands losing blood flow all together. He was pressing so tightly!

"Erik! Erik! Oh, _please_! You're hurting me... you're hurting me!" I moaned, beginning to fear that he was never going to let go of my arms... I shrunk away seeing that he was finished, and I fell to the ground on my legs, feeling sore and hurting inside and out.

I threw myself further to get off my bruised legs, and was laying on the ground, stomach down, and all I could suddenly only hear was his heavy breathing like that of a raging animal as I heard things crash through the entire room. I dared not to look up, in fear of what my eyes may land upon. I cried into my arms, frightened out of my mind that he was going to kill me. I shut my eyes so tightly as if it may just disappear when I open them again, but the noise never seemed to stop. None of it was near me.

When I first heard silence, it was after the sound of a cat moved past me. I looked up, and saw Ayesha looking at me as if I just killed something, looking as hatefully as a normal human could. She gave her usual hiss and ran off further into the room, which caused me to look up, in fear Erik may harm his own cat in the process of wrecking the room, but everything was frozen right now.

The side tables were overturned, one of the sofas were, and everything from the desk was thrown off of it, papers were_ everywhere_ and books were thrown off the shelves, and in the middle of it all was the black figure of Erik, hunched over hiding his head in his arms, toward me. The only thing that seemed to be untouched was his mask that laid right by my feet, looking at me also very mockingly. And it wasn't my fault.

"You wanted to see, didn't you? You damned prying Pandora, you wanted to see? Oh,_ mad_ Christine why did you want to see?" His voice grew higher, and I noticed he was trying to hide tears.

"No, I didn't..." I dragged on, though my words were already meaningless. The sadness in his voice seemed to burn me into pieces, from my insides and out... _what have I done to this man_?

"Know..." He began and I looked up, seeing him slowly rising from his curled-up position on the floor, "Know that it is a corpse that loves you... and _adores_ you... and will never _ever_ leave you!" He exclaimed in one more angry pandemonium and collapsed, looking at me.

"Oh, Christine..." he began slowly, sniffling, "I thought... I thought maybe just as long as you thought I was handsome... that you may love me in return... You wouldn't have so much to fear... one could get used to _anything_ if there's enough time for it... I thought... maybe for once one could _love_ me... When my mother was one to throw me the mask as my only gift and my father who never saw me... Mad, mad, Christine... why would you give yourself over to such horror?"

I couldn't notice while listening to his pitiful words that I was bawling, into my hand, constantly wiping up my tears, using the cloth of my shirt. "Now, I cannot ever let you go again. Not after you've seen my face. No, now you're bound to me forever..."

"No..." I cried so softly he probably didn't hear me, but I was shaking my head, coming to my bruised knees, and looking at him.

"Oh, Christine... I love you so much, so much that I'll do _anything_ for you! _Anything_! I'll have the world at your feet, I'll give you anything you've always wished for... I could make you the happiest of women on this horrible earth! If you could just love me... in return... for once..." he let out another drawn-out and heartbroken moan, which seemed to completely shatter my world, shatter everything I've ever thought.

"Erik..." I began through my sobs which had stopped because he was crying for us both... _crying_ for me... Almost begging for my kind words. He cried, again, shoving his head further into his arms.

"You think I'm a monster now..." he assumed himself, letting out another sob.

"Why _me_...?" I asked quietly, sobbing out the words, hardly sounding like words, my face warm and tear-stained. I felt so broken up inside that I might shatter if I move any further. I looked to the mask now, looking at it as if it might bite me... I picked it up slowly, taking it into my hands simply to look at, the black material burning in my hands.

"Because I love you more than you can ever know or imagine," He replied in response, "Your voice... your everything... My _angel_..."

I seemed to be cut lower to the ground, my cold words coming back to me. I looked to the mask once more, and outstretched the arm that held it, my arm shaking so quickly, as was my body, scared I might break one more piece.

"Erik..." I whispered, crawling closer to him, the mask still in my hand. "Erik," my voice was shaking as the mask dropped to the ground, "Show me your face without fear... show me it just as plain as you see mine."

He didn't move, he stayed there, shaking... "Please, _show me_..." I whispered brokenly, rising with shaky legs to standing. He seemed to move just a little, his arms moving out and revealing his forehead with the black strands of hair.

"_Show me_," I whispered again, thinking this might help... though I wasn't sure. _Oh, Lord,_ help_ me... What do I do, father? _

He began to rise, so slowly and so measured-out, his entire body shaking in something like fear. He moved up slowly, keeping his head low so I still couldn't see. "_Show me_." I whispered once more, feeling another sob escape my throat as I said that. He looked up slowly, and revealed his face to me once more, with tears rolling down his sunken cheeks, his eyes piercing and heartbreaking and it hurt me so much... I wanted to hug him, but I couldn't bring myself to do so... I didn't know what to do.

"Christine..." He fell... and for a second I thought he was falling toward me, but he was at my feet, and shaking with sobs, his disgusting face, and the absence of his nose allowing him to bend lower. A detail as small as that caused me to look up and away, praying to God to give me help in how to fix the broken.

* * *

**Ook... well I always love being creative with unmasking sequences especially when their relationship is kind of... apart... Now all she can do is pity him, of course, but I wanna know what you think this chapter. I was crying, I think, just a little when I was writing his words. Just to clarify once more, yes, Erik's mask is a full, Leroux mask, covering his mouth including.**

So with not much else to be said is that my quick updates have a purpose. I'm trying to get at least most of the story finished before I go to band camp and flute camp and then after that I'll be so damn busy with school it won't be funny and I'll be traumatically deprived of wriitng,. I apologize if it's not suspenseful enough for you just yet, I'm getting there, and don't worry about me writing quickly, I do it all the time especially when I have nothing to do. It doesn't affect my writing I don't think.

THANKS FOR REVIEWING AND NOW YOU HAVE YOU REVIEW! MUAHAHAHA. I feel special now _

~The Phantom's Flutist~


	7. Relief

**Weird, I know, right? I didn't update as quickly as before. Well, forgive me if you were overhearingly stuck in suspense. I hope very sincerely to get new reviewers, which would be awesome, but I can't keep my hopes up so much, after all, the reviewers I have are already excellent enough. I hope that you may not see the sudden writers block I had in the process of writing this chapter, I hope you don't mind because I would like to give this particular impression of the dullness but not while making the writing dull, so I would have to have some sort of event going on at all times. I think it might be horrible how I'm doing it, so that's exactly why I had a writer's block. *sigh*... Well, anyway, enjoy this chapter.**

**Please, please, please review. I love you all for doing so already!**

**~The Phantoms Flutist~**

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_Chapter 7:_

_Relief_

It was like an eternity before everything started moving again, and the world came back to life. I had my hand outstretched with the mask, kneeling down to his level, and he looked at me with his golden eyes, and at the mask as if I would it was going to bite him, looking to me like a child... Nobody has ever said such heartfelt words to me, and nothing so complex in my wildest dreams. How could he love me so? I was human, a girl, and stupid and naive and a child that is scared of her own shadow if something is far too large for her to manage she screams and runs and rebels until it's over... How could he love me? How could he care when everyone else except Raoul didn't? How could he even begin to understand where my own two feet were when I didn't? And he tells me these words with utmost sincerity, with care and pitiful need...

He was still at my feet, his waxy forehead bent over, and I was frightened in such a way to touch it, but I did so anyway, I wanted to comfort him with the same desire I had to run. I wanted to tell him it will all be fine, but I didn't find the words to piece together. I had the human desire to help, but how could I? If he looked up again, I would probably scream and run off... and I didn't want to, but it seems only reasonable. I stood there, touching his shoulder, and the simple touch made him shiver.

"Erik..." I began, piecing together any words that came to mind to create a logical sentence for once. "I didn't understand you at first... but I think, finally, I do in a way..." I whispered so quietly, I was surprised my mouth was moving at all. With a shaking hand, he took the mask, and placed it back over his face, seeming to shed a few years simply with that, and he rose to his long, skeletal form, taller than me as usual, and I remained kneeling on the ground. I looked up, wiping the few tears I had left.

"Thank you," His voice was so soft and gentle... Oh, how lovely... it seemed to be that his face was the price for his extraordinary talents and inhuman voice. I shook my head, finding myself lost once more, looking onto his masked face, but only seeing his true face anymore, not even any clues to a natural face. I rose to my feet as well, taking my own face into my hands. I began to run quickly, not knowing what else I could do, and I ran out of the room, slamming the door behind me.

I ran up the stairs and into the familiar hallway with the familiar room and a bed that would hear me out... So confused and bothered.

I collapsed on the bed, and cried into the pillow, finding myself once more in my prison with a man I still hardly knew, who looks like a corpse and loves me. Oh, God... what do I do? _What do I do_?

A knock startled me, and I rolled onto my stomach. "Go away!" I hissed between sobs.

"It's me," Anne's voice sounded through the door, and knocked again, "Can I come in?" She asked innocently. I didn't have to answer before she slid in through the door, and came straight to me in the bed, sitting at the other end. The kindly women rubbed my back.

"I didn't mean to..." I whispered, shaking my head, "I didn't mean to hurt him..."

"You didn't take the mask, did you?" She asked, suddenly aghast.

"No, it... fell because... I don't remember, but it fell and... and... I saw... and..." I trailed off, my heart thudding at the memory. I leaned into her shoulder and sobbed, and she rubbed my back.

"I know, dear, I know..."

"Do you?" I asked, instantly curious.

"When I first met him, he had his mask off when I came into the room. I barely saw it, but it was just enough to understand, but all I could do was walk back out of the room, clutching the towels in my hand and waiting for him to come over the sudden fear."

"How...?" I asked, shaking my head, "how did he become like that...?"

"That is something you will have to ask him, for I cannot explain." She inquired softly.

I remained there, crying into her shoulder, regretting everything as it gripped my heart and squeezed it, and I didn't know what to do now.

I heard something crash downstairs, and her head shot up.

"Something more..." She shook her head, and patted my back once more, I watched as she left, and feeling slightly comforted with someone there like a mother and it was nice to actually have someone there for me, for someone to understand. I felt grateful, all of a sudden, that Erik was rich enough to have servants. I'm just terrified of when the time comes that he thinks of taking everything from me, to strip me completely of all my happy thoughts all together. And I thought I was doing quite well without my father until Erik came along...

I didn't want to be in this room for so long, but I felt that if I stepped out of the room once again, than something may attack and break me down even more. Maybe... I'll take a bath... get away from this room without actually leaving. I agreed to this all myself and stepped into the bathroom.

I let the warm water flow, letting the heat rise and soothe me somewhat. I stepped into the filled tub, and laid my head back taking in the aroma. I looked to the water... it would be so easy to simply slip into the water and let go of everything. _So easy_... I unconsciously slipped into the water, letting my head go under, and I stayed there for at least 10 seconds before I got terrified of death in itself... letting the darkness take over, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

I came out of the water, coughing up the water I actually did take in unconsciously, and blinked away the water, shuddering.

_I was falling, falling and I couldn't see anything. Panicking, as I flailed my arms out in the water that was far too over my head. I was frightened, my heart thud in my throat, and I was in the water, letting myself drown, without knowing how to come back up. I was going to drown... I was going to drown... It was dark... and there is a hand outstretched in the water with the light surrounding it. I grabbed it... holding onto it for dear life..._

The memory was painful, my cousin pushed me into the pool at only 5-years-old and I didn't know how to swim until my dad dipped his hand into the water to fish me out. For the next 5 years I was terrified of water, not going into the pool no matter how hard my friends tried to convince me... And ever since I had some sort of strange feeling that the water was a bottomless pit that would swallow me whole and I'll never see the light again...

There was a knock on the door suddenly and I shot up in the water, looking at the door.

"Christine?" Erik's voice was on the other side. What do I say? I swallowed hard, choking on more water.

"What do you want?" I coughed again.

"Just wondering... where you went..."

"I'm taking a bath... go away." I demanded coldly, and I believe I heard him sigh, and he walked away. I was instantly relieved that he didn't open the door because I forgot to lock it.

I heard the other door shut as well, and my heart slowed back to its normal pace, and I relaxed back into the water, leaning my head back, and shut my eyes, trying to forget though it was not successful at all. I eventually sank into a nap.

I awoke when the water was freezing, and the world felt slightly different... I was taking a nap naked in the bathtub... oh, that was a mistake. He could have been in here! I jumped out of the tub and dried off quickly, putting my clothes back on, and dried my hair briefly for the ends were slightly wet and went into my empty and dull bedroom only to collapse on my bed once more, and fell asleep once more.

I woke up in the middle of the night, somehow believing it was a bright and glorious morning, and found that it was 4 in the morning, and it was still night outside. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to go back to sleep, but after another half hour of staring at the dark ceiling, I couldn't bare simply laying there anymore. I settled with putting on a pair of sweatpants and bringing a book I brought up from the library before the incident, and I went down to the living room to read, not wanting to stay in my room or venture back into the library in fear of the memories...

I looked inside the door to the living room to see if Erik would be sitting right there, and if so, I fully intended on going back to my room. Fortunately, he wasn't, so I went ahead and stepped inside shakily, and sat onto the sofa where I usually sit, leaning my back against the armrest, and began to read with somewhat comfort.

As I read I could hardly concentrate, feeling uncomfortable at the thought of such a man is living with me. He caused the entire room to fall apart out of sudden rage. He didn't touch me, though, he seemed to harm everything in the room except me and Ayesha, as if there was a bubble. But he was capable of that much... Could that happen again? I shuddered... my future looked extremely dim, and I felt as if I was drained. No, I can't go to Juilliard like I dreamed. And, no, I cannot be in a Broadway play or maybe even an opera. No, I won't be able to see Raoul again. Yes... yes, I am very much so stuck here just like him, and we'd be together, just as he said, and he'd say he love me and would I huddle up like this, terrified of him and what he may do, jumping and screaming at anything he would do... And I would cry which would get me nowhere, my only social connection being the maid. How sad. How _terrible_.

The more I thought of it, the more I began to ponder if he would actually let me go. Stubborn just as I was, I suppose, neither of us giving in, leaving a big and miserable mess.

I could escape, I suppose. I could run out the front door and keep running though I never was even good at running and I haven't ran from something before, so I couldn't judge just how fruitful my escape attempt may just be. He would be mad, perhaps. Maybe sad... Oh, I couldn't stand those tears again! It hurt a lot seeing someone as strong as he _was_ break down in front of me and cry. He lost his dignity for me, but I didn't remove it. It fell... and he was mad because he thought I stole it. He didn't _listen_...

This was so wrong, so twisted of a situation. Is he even considered my guardian anymore? If not, it could be holding me hostage, or a disappearance. But who would know me to care? Raoul thinks I simply left him, I'm sure. But what if he doesn't think that?

The rest of the conversation in my head was filled with the following "what-ifs" and exceptions of the "what-ifs" I was asking to myself. I looked to the small clock on the side table which read 5:40.

I began to notice soft music starting to play in another room, obviously the music room, where else? It wasn't something I've recognized before, though, it was so bittersweet and heart-wrenchingly beautiful, and it was being played by a violin. A part of me wanted to close my ears and hum softly over it to block it from reaching my ears, but then the other part was curious and spellbound, and I felt vulnerable to whatever lay before me on the other side of this wall. How could I give in so easily?

I rose from my seat, the silent war beginning in my head to walk straight or turn back and go to my prison room. Come to think of it, this would be the perfect time for something... well, without another word for it, bold.

"What are you doing up so early, Christine?" Erik's sudden presence in the room startled me once more, carrying a violin in his hand, looking slightly drained.

"I..." I began stupidly, searching for the correct words. "Wasn't able to go back to sleep when I awoke suddenly, so I decided to read. I think... I'm going upstairs now." I began to walk off and to the foyer, but something touching my shoulder caused me to pause in my tracks.

"Wait, please stay down here. Just... please?" He begged of me imploringly, using his voice more than anything else.

"I'm going upstairs." I rebelled sourly, shrugging out of his grasp.

"How could you want to stay up there?" He asked suddenly. I thought about it for a second, "Do you hate me so?"

"I don't _hate_ anyone..." I whispered knowingly, and it was true for I was raised to be that way but I've neglected it so long, how could I hate Erik? He who weeps at my feet, a grown man, and tells me he's given me all this out of love, I don't see how anyone could even turn around and say how much I hated him again. "I don't hate you."

I wanted to know the thoughts running through his head right then. I don't know, maybe he was dead set on me despising him, that that took him in surprise. Either way, he was more settled then before, and I turned to look at the only lovely feature that he has physically which are his eyes, which could be considered beautiful for they are the most interesting shade of brownish gold that glowed... If that makes sense. I just thought it was interesting to stare at the the only exposed normal feature and how he conveys emotions through only his eyes silently.

"Will I ever be allowed to leave, Erik?" I asked quietly, trying hard to sound strong about it.

He was thinking, I knew it this time, he was actually planning something in his head, concocting something that is promising.

"How about we go for a little outing tonight? You and I."

That wasn't exactly the answer I was expecting, but it sounded good enough for now. I suppose I shouldn't ask for much after what has happened, what's been exposed...

"Where shall we go?" I timidly questioned, playing with the fabric of my pants entwining in my fingers over and over again.

"You'll have to wait and see," He replied in a brighter tone. "I suggest you wear something formal."

Suddenly excited at seeing the outside world again after who knows how long... It was like my entire time being here was simply a blur.

"How long have I been here?" I thought aloud, looking to him.

"Three weeks more or less."

God, that long? I nodded acknowledgedly, "When will we be leaving?"

"How about before dinner?"

"But..."

"We will have to miss the lesson today," he replied, already knowing what I was going to hint at. I nodded and walked away from him without further ado. I stayed in my room for the rest of the day, drawing on paper I found and writing with a calligraphy pen that was simply fun to write with.

The rest day passed by as so, Erik trying to spark a conversation at the table during breakfast, but I simply ignored him, waiting for the time when he announces that we'd be leaving. I waited impatiently almost, walking back and forth across my room. I looked at myself, which was a mess, in the mirror, and decided I should occupy my time to looking decent, for I honestly looked dead.

I picked a white summer dress, which had a halter top, tying around my neck, and a v-neck which I was rather cautious of... I suppose it was that I didn't want to make him... look too much further. I tied my unmanageable curly hair into a pony tail to keep it off my neck and powdered my face to hide the dark circles around my eyes... I looked almost back to normal, or at least somewhat if I was to show my face to anyone besides Erik. It then bothered me that I had no idea where we were going.

"Are you ready to go, Christine?" Erik knocked on the door.

"Yes, hold on." I replied hurriedly, taking in a deep breath of nerve. I opened the door to find him standing _right_ there, looking down to me, amused. He outstretched his hand for me to take but I found myself simply staring at it. He put it back to his side slowly, and began to walk and I followed him behind.

We went out the front door, this being my second time leaving through here, but last time I was too involved to notice the outdoors and the garden and fully appreciate it.

He noticed my interest in the surroundings, "Do you like it?" He asks that a lot. Why should my opinion matter when he's always so proud of everything else?

"Yes," I simply answered and he walked on to the circle where a black sports car was waiting with tinted windows, Thomas, the driver, was standing near the door, opening it for me, and I stepped shakily inside breathing, "thank you," and went furthest to the window as I could, seeing Erik was going to sit right next to me. I looked out the window again, holding my hands on my knees to keep from showing any sort of nerve. It was fine, I suppose, because he was looking out his own tinted window, watching outside of it in pretty much the same position as I. I looked back out the window before he had enough time to notice that I was staring at him with a weird expression.

I was tense for the entire ride and very uncomfortable, for it was, indeed, a long car ride.

We were traveling into a city that I have not been to before, it was a very small city, though, business buildings, offices, restaurants, all the basic sort of things that a small city such as this would have. I looked to see small boutiques flowing with people... _people_... It was nice to see society once more after being kept in.

"We'll be getting off here," his voice sounded from beside me. I opened my eyes wide in surprise and instant curiosity. Not only was I worried, but I also found that I'd be receiving many stares simply because of the man I'd be walking next to.

Erik opened the door and got out, and outstretched his hand for me to take, and I stared at it once more. "Dear, I insist upon it this time." He remarked. I took his actually gloved hand this time, and let him hold it, though I was intending on trying to pull it out if he held it any tighter.

I stepped out of the car by his side, with a crowd of people walking by. None of them, out of my utmost startled point of view, turned to see the man walking by in the mask. I looked up to see if he was still there as we walked along the side walk, and of course he was... but we just weren't getting any curious stares. Weird.

I had to walk fast to keep up though, it felt like I should run. His legs were so long, therefore his stride was probably triple my own. I felt stupid running while he was walking but, once more, nobody turned to look. I peaked behind my shoulder to, indeed, see stares as we walked by which relieved me in a way. It was evidently too busy of a city to even manage to turn at strange people if there was enough. Reminds me of New York City, now that I think back on it.

We stopped at a restaurant that looked even fancier than where Raoul took me, and... it was deserted. I looked up to Erik and waited for an answer, but I didn't receive one. Okay, then, Erik... why not? It was Italian, my absolute favorite foods, with the lights glowing dim and the waitress didn't even look up when we first came in.

"I'd like the table I reserved, please." Erik mentioned and the young waitress turned around, startled, looking to me then to him, and nodded slowly. Erik let go of my hand finally, and I massaged it, feeling the bruise show itself once more to me that he placed there before.

We sat down to a menu, a napkin expertly folded, and a glass of water laid out at both of our seats. It was too insanely normal that I thought my mind could explode. "You're waiter will be out in a few minutes." The hostess said to us and walked off shakily, looking back to us as she strut away.

"Did you buy this entire place out, or something?" I asked quietly, looking to him who was already looking at the menu. My brow furrowed... and so now he was going to eat in front of me? Ha ha... wow...

"Yes," He answered indifferently. What else could he have done?

"Okay, then," I replied quietly, placing the napkin into my lap, and opened the menu... the prices were so high, but what did it matter? I wasn't about to show my surprise if not already conveyed through my sudden gasp. He showed no interest toward it, looking through the menu, I thought, until in my peripheral vision, his glowing golden eyes were placed on me. "What?" I asked and he shook his head and went back to looking through the menu.

"Are you actually going to eat?" I questioned.

"I might."

"Interesting." I replied, "Why don't you eat in the first place? Is food not good enough for you?"

"There are some things in life that are more fulfilling than a brief alternative." His answer struck me as impeccably strange.

"But people have to eat once in a while or else you could die," I said, the words were small, and dully said. I think he smiled at them, and I felt stupid once more.

"Why would that worry you?" He asked tilting his head to the side.

"I'm not sure," I replied, looking distractedly to the menu to see what was on it. Dishes that even I didn't know how to decode. I looked to the list that was labeled "lasagne" and stuck with looking through descriptions of delicious-sounding foods that I was actually familiar with.

The waitress came around and offered the drinks, and I simply took hot tea as usual, and Erik took a glass of wine which was obviously expensive enough that he would have to drink it. Already making my decision, I now had to decide whether or not I should actually talk to him. He was obviously desperate to take some words out of me... I was stuck with him for now, so why not?

"I suppose... that we have a truce, then?" I asked slowly, and he looked up, surprised.

"Whatever do you mean?"

"You know... that accident and... I saw..." I arched my shoulders, playing with my hands, feeling extremely awkward.

He shrugged, "I had the reservations made beforehand, so it wouldn't matter."

"You could have canceled," I offered, arching one brow.

"That's correct, but I didn't want to waste it. I figured that you would dearly enjoy what I am going to take you to." He answered unfurling an elegant hand conversationally.

"There's more?"

"You'll see," he was amused once more by my pressing questions, as if I was his toy again.

"So... are we? You know..."

"Yes, I suppose so." He answered, nodding, leaning into his chair. I nodded as well, feeling slightly better off, feeling the guilt that never seems to have left me, finally get off of my shoulders


	8. Rejection and Promises

**Hehe... yay for a day of doing nothing! I believe this would be my last non-busy day of the summer *score!* because I'll be camping on wednesday, and I'll try to write as much as I can for the next chapter but I'm afraid I'll be busy with entertaining a guest at the same time. After then I'll be preparing for a master class and then going to a flute camp... soo, I'll be writing every night after then. I'm not even halfway finished with this story, so it's intimidating to finish it before school starts again... well, anyway, that's my two cents.  
I noticed a lag in reviews, which is okay considering everyone except for myself is most likely on vacation currently, and also declining hit numbers going down the list. Well, I'm not blaming you, but if you are reading this, I'd like it very much for you to review and tell me what you think. Thanks to the one person who did review, debkay, and I appreciate my usual reviewers as well.**

**READ AND REVIEW**

**~The Phantom's Flutist~  
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_Chapter 8:_

_Rejection and Promises_

The next few moments were spent in silence until the food came around to our table. I thanked the waitress as she walked off, and looked to Erik who looked at his food as if it was a fine specimen. He actually picked up his fork and knife and lifted his mask up slightly to reveal his thin lips, and swallowed the food, and I stood stupidly watching.

"Have you ever been to an opera, Christine?" He asked cutting another piece of food as I mimicked him and took the first bite of the delectable lasagna.

"My dad took me... once." I replied, swallowing the bite.

"Do you remember which one you saw?" He asked, not bothering to take another bite of his own dish.

"_Don Giovanni_, I think." I answered, taking another eager bite at my dish. He nodded thoughtfully. "Is that what we are going to do tonight? See an opera?" I asked eagerly.

"You guessed correctly," this time I saw him smile, with those thin lips, and it was absolutely beautiful to see after I saw him cry with the same look.

"Exciting," I replied, making myself sound as pleased as I felt.

"I'm glad you're excited," he replied, "The company that is in it is renown for their excellence which might be very enjoyable. But we'll see, won't we?" He was trying to be very conversational, but I couldn't bring myself to even starting it.

"I guess." I replied, letting my head fall, and ate another bite once more.

He was silent once more, and took a sip of his wine with one elegant hand and I watched that hand as if it was telling me to watch. For some odd reason, it still astounded me how graceful he was... almost as if he was a ghost. I ate the rest of my meal silently and finished off my tea, once finished I looked up to find Erik's meal only half finished, with his mask covering his mouth once more.

"I believe we should be on our way," Erik suddenly said and placed many twenty-dollar bills on the table and rose from his seat across from me, and I rose at the same time, and followed him out of the restaurant without waiting for the waitress.

He grabbed my hand again, as if I was going to run away, which, all-in-all is not a bad idea, quite frankly. I _would _but where would I go _to_? I guess it was best if he only held my hand instead of anywhere else, but I felt like I was his child or something and he pulling me along. The black car was waiting for us once more outside the restaurant with Thomas leaning against it, and opened the door for me politely once more, and we were inside. Erik seemed to be anxious yet without showing it.

"What opera are we seeing?" I asked.

"I intended on most of this being a surprise, but if you insist..." He teased looking out the window once more.

"No, I'll wait." I pressed seeing that he wanted me to be surprised. I might as well play along with it. I gave him a reassuring nod when he looked over, smiling lightly.

It wasn't until a few blocks later when we stopped at a grand-looking building that had elegant designs, and was evidently an Opera House. He helped me out of the car and outside onto the sidewalk, but we didn't enter through the front door.

Suddenly aware that we were heading somewhere else, I looked around and then spoke up to Erik, "Where are we going?" I asked.

"We are going through the back for obvious reasons."

"You didn't mind before now," I pressed angrily as he pulled me along.

"I happen to have a reputation here that might not peacefully be acknowledged." He answered calmly.

"Like what?" I asked impatiently.

"That sort of thing can be explained once we get inside," he answered, and opened some sort of door to the side next to the parking garage that was placed next to the theater, though people were not here yet so there was no cars except for a few parked there, and we got inside of the door easily. He led me through a dimly lit hallway and then through another door that led to a large marble staircase. We eventually came to a row of boxes that overlook the entire house, and we stopped at the fifth one closest to the stage. He let me into the box and then followed me, leaving the door open.

It was decorated elegantly, with red velvet flooring and chairs, with a marble railing crossing the front. I never exactly been in a box at an opera house, but it was a cozy place that had a beyond-excellent view of the stage. I wasn't able to feel the least bit comfortable not knowing what, exactly, his reputation was. I sat onto the comfortable chair and was handed a playbill.

"I thought you may want to look through this with your interest in playbills." He explained, sitting right next to me, looking at it over my shoulder. I was reminded of his stalking behind me for all these years and with enough knowledge that I collected playbills when I lived with my father from people or from plays or musicals that I've seen, including some operas that my father's colleagues went to.

I read the title on the front, _Madame Butterfly_, which was an opera that usually came to the opera house my father and I went to, but we never got a chance to see it.

When I opened to the first page I saw him from my peripheral vision reading over the cast list, and then I heard him grunt.

"What is it?" I asked curiously.

"The leading soprano isn't the best, but she's fine... The entire purpose of this was to inspire you to sing this music, and she is not the best outlet of success."

"Then why is she in the opera?"

"Because her father has money," He said simply, "Of course, I do, as well, but all the money in the world would have this company let go of their 'dazzling star.'" He said coldly, this time not about me which was okay, I guess.

People started filling the seats below us in the house, their conversing voices echoing up to where we sat and I watched curiously, and then resided reading the synopsis of the opera before the curtain finally fell.

The music was stunning and elegant, with hints of American tunes in the music which I thought was very interesting considering it was Italian. I thought, to say the least, the leading baritone was very good, and I was only able to judge because when one could hear Erik, all the other voices are imperfect in their own ways. The music was entrancing, but not quite as beautiful as when Erik plays it, of course.

I stayed interested for the entire opera, keeping my eyes glued to the stage, watching the performers sing. He was about right, I was somewhat inspired but only because I wanted to _be_ them... I wanted to sing and have applause, and it was what my father wanted, what I've _always_ wanted. I didn't want to be stuck with Erik forever and waiting until he has my voice as perfectioned as he implies every lesson. The opera left me, until the final applause, having me rise out of my chair and applauding to tears as Butterfly blindfolded her child, and then pressing a knife into her chest. It was dramatic, and the actress pulled it off so powerfully. I wiped the tears, before the lights blared so that Erik would see.

I turned to Erik who was standing out of his chair, looking slightly perturbed.

"That was really good!" I commented.

"Could have been better, but yes, very good." He replied dryly.

"Just because nobody else can pull off perfect music to the point of unreal beauty, doesn't mean it wasn't matching up to fulfilling standards," I disagreed, arching a brow to him, waiting for his reply.

"We will continue this conversation in the car, but first we need to get out. I would like to get out of here before the crowds do without taking a back way if you don't mind."

I didn't answer to that and followed him out just when a few people began filing out of their boxes. I was gripped by Erik's hand to my wrist, and I was almost dragged because I could not walk out fast enough, not letting me take in any sort of granduer of the Opera House. We were walking out to the sidewalks in front of it, deserted from the lateness of the night.

"Christine!" I heard my name across the room, and I cranned back my head to see Raoul, surprisingly, standing next to his brother.

"Oh, my God..." I whispered beneath my breath. This was my chance, of course! "Raoul!" I screamed, now literally being dragged, and I was leaning against Erik's pull on my wrist. Leaning so far I almost fell to the ground, but he still had a good grasp on my wrist so I could not move. "Raoul, oh God!" I screamed as he ran over. Finally, Erik turned around, realizing the situation, and he let go of my wrist letting me fall to the ground which hurt. "Help me! Please!" I couldn't help but scream, neither of them seemed to notice. I got up quickly from the ground, wiping myself off of the dirt from my now stained white dress.

Erik was looking at Raoul with a murderous glare and for the slightest moment I thought he might just kill him.

"Let go of her!" Raoul said rebelliously, with as much strength of a five-year-old compared to Erik.

"She's mine!" Erik snarled, and launched himself at Raoul, grabbing his neck.

"No!" I screamed and ran over, my vision becoming blurred and panicked. "Erik, let go! Let go!" I screeched, tugging at his coat, pulling with all my strength but there was no such luck. "We can go! Come on! Just let go of him! He didn't _do _anything!" I screamed.

Raoul fell to the ground, and got up, enough to reach for my hand, and I tried to reach it, but missed entirely when Erik began to drag me away by both of my wrists into one handed grasp. I had to run once more, looking back to Raoul helplessly standing there, calling my name and crying as I did.

Before I knew it, I was literally thrown into the car, and I leaned my head back onto the seat, sobbing and scared half-to-death of what Erik did... he intended on _killing Raoul_! I sobbed into my hand now so Erik wouldn't see my distorted face.

"We were having a perfectly fine time until he showed up," Erik hissed from the other side of the car. I remained silent, wanting to shout a million things at him, but only coming out as another moan. "Hush, darling..." He tried to soothe me, his hand outstretched to touch me, but I saw it before it did, and leaned away as far as I could for him not to. "I wasn't going to kill him," he responded to my thoughts, which was an utter lie.

"Yes, you were!" I screamed at him, wanting to slap him so hard, but how would I do so with a mask in my way? I don't believe it would have the same effect... "You were, you were, you were!" I hissed, receiving a glare from Thomas in warning to shut up. I didn't listen... Erik _needed_ to listen to me! "Don't lie to me! I saw what you did, I saw what you look like! What you said! How could you not want to kill him!?"

He didn't answer, and looked to me painfully, he reached his hand out once more, shaking. "Don't you touch me!" I hissed, leaning away, panicked once more. I heard an angry snarl from the other side as I turned my head, and went on sobbing into my hand which later turned into my arms.

The remaining car ride was silent except for my soft sobs, out of panic and anger. I had not a chance against Erik. He could harm Raoul again if I pull something more off! I was lucky he didn't already!

Once we stepped inside of the house a half hour later Erik ordered me to instantly go to my room.

"I was already going!" I shouted back at him and stomped away up the staircase and into my room. I changed quickly and leaped into bed, and screamed into my pillow, trying to muffle it as much as I could so Erik wouldn't come dashing up the stairs to think I just killed something.

I cried myself to a deep sleep, with no dreams, and an uncomfortable outlook upon my future.

I awoke very late in the morning to find myself still laying there after an hour of being awake, looking to the ceiling and dreaming of disappearing. I didn't want to read, I didn't want to move, I only wanted to nail myself to this bed and stare at something until I disappeared from the earth. How can my life get any worse? All... I wanted... was a home to call mine until I was able to leave, and to live comfortably in. Is that too much to ask? How could God mistake that only request? He stripped me of my parents, of a home, of any sort of family I could hope of, and now gave to me a man who was broken and slightly off of his rocker and says he loves me so much to the point that I wonder upon my own sanity if I spent too long with him. I could cry for Erik, I could cry for myself... I only pitied Erik, there was nothing there... It was understandable why he acts the way he does for he didn't have a good enough mother to pat her son's head and say "I love you." It was understandable that he never had someone on his shoulder telling him "no" because of his brilliant mind, but God was pushing buttons on me of restricting me by using this man.

Well, what was supposed to come from it? A hint of insanity? A slap on the face for something I did to deserve this? The only problem is, I didn't _do _anything. I was a good little Catholic girl, praying my prayers every night, going to mass when instructed, and I had such a firm faith in my religion, and I still do. It's just maddening trying to find out the answer to this situation.

A knock was heard on my door, and I didn't bother to move my dry and cracked lips to say anything.

"Christine?" Erik's voice asked from the other side. "You can't ignore me forever... it's noon..." He pressed firmly.

I didn't answer, staring at the door just waiting for him to barge in and invade my privacy once more. I felt shredded and tattered and broken and there was nothing there to piece me back up again like Raoul was. No glue is left because I've been broken too many times. It looks like I ran out.

"Answer me," He pressed, and opened the door slowly, to reveal half of his mask peering through to me. I stared at him dully, letting more tears drip down my face.

"Christine, please don't cry anymore, you know I hate to see you cry." He whispered, coming closer which was the first time I moved, almost sliding off the edge of my bed. "All I want is to see you smiling again. Just like you used to..." I didn't answer to that unreasonable statement, once again, pinning my lips together firmly. "And when I saw you smile to your father I saw how much you adored him with all your heart, and now I want you back... I want the real Christine back..."

I rolled over to my other side, digging my head into the pillow.

"She's gone," I murmured into the pillow, which he possibly did not hear.

"I could make you happy again, Christine, I could give you the world and my unending love," He said quietly. "Fear can turn to love," he sounded as if he was reassuring himself. That makes no sense...

"I love you _so_ much..." He added with an imploring tone. "I could take you to the opera any time you want, and perhaps one day you may audition for a role. I'd give you the best education in the subject. _Anything_ you want."

"I want to leave," I replied sourly.

"You haven't began to see what I can do for you," He pressed.

"You said that days ago, and-"

"I can't let you go," He replied before I finished. "If you could have an open mind..."

"What do you think I had when I came here, Erik? Then what did you do, you took my original freedom away and then didn't let me see Raoul just for once and in _peace_ and you scared the crap out of me and now you're asking for me to stay here... just think about it for a second and _listen _to me for once!"

"Give me another chance, Christine, just once more... I can make you happy, just wait!" He rebelled, grabbing my hand, and placed it near his lips, lifting up his mask a little, and kissed my hand.

I glared, sitting up straight and taking my hand away from his grasp. "As long as you promise not to harm Raoul ever... he means no harm at all..." I whispered.

"I promise," He replied, kissing my hand again and I didn't want to smack him away, so I only stared at his grotesque lips pressing to my skin, and pressed my hand onto the cheek of his mask and once more, I didn't have the right heart to pull away for he was desperate... not one person has ever been so desperate for my affection, it's so... weird.

He stood up from the bed and outstretched his hand elegantly, dropping it as if just remembering. "Come, we need to catch up with our lesson," He offered, I stood on my bed looking at him, just waiting until his bravado wore off. "Waiting for it does your voice no justice, come, Christine. I'm not going to harm you."

I blinked at him, "I know that."

"Will you follow me, then? Please?" He was pleading again, and I wanted to turn away, and scream at him to stop doing that because or else I think I may go insane. I slowly put my feet onto the ground and began to walk over to him who held open the door, waiting patiently.

Today in my lessons, I finally reached a high C, and for the first time he complimented me during a lesson, and moved on as if it never happened, though I got even more difficult music. I think the only times where I was most at peace was during my lessons, for music was always my scape goat, leading me to believe I am where the music takes me either beside my father or beside my Raoul. It hurt, yes, but put emotion into my singing for once, and I couldn't believe it was my own voice, that somehow Erik was manipulating me to sing these lovely notes. But how is that possible?

"You're getting better, darling." He commented with a light tone._ Don't call me darling,_ I thought in my head, rolling my eyes behind his back and sighing. He shut the piano lid and then turned to face me. "It won't be much longer before you're ready to perform."

"I suppose..." I whispered, shaking my head, looking down to my hands.

"Your father would be very proud," He tried to reassure me.

"I know, but..." I curled my hands up, "It could be really nerve-wracking, you know? Like... always cautious of what peoply say and it effects your career... like you with that Carlotta who was performing yesterday."

"No, you see, you don't pay attention to them. My opinion matters but... Christine, you're stronger than that. I know you can do well, you just need to feel good about it and sing like you do for me. Understand? Don't be nervous just yet." He explained reassuring me, trying to get into my gaze to look right at me.

I smiled a little, for it was something to feel okay about, to think about performing again made my heart take a few leaps in the air. And to have the greatest musican I'm yet to meet tell me such things was good, I suppose, though he may be...

"Isn't that a little biased?"

"I don't think so," He replied assuringly. "As long as you have my power you'd be starring in whatever you put your mind to."

"Erik, don't do that..." I replied glaring, "That's not fair."

"Of course not, dear," he replied, though I don't think he was listening as he stood up, filing the music away into another messy stack.

"My father would like my singing maybe, but definitely not being pushed forth," I begrudged.

"I won't push you to anything," he promised quietly, "I'd already know that you'd be wanting it."

"How do you know I'd want it, though?" I hissed, losing patience for everything he said now was wrong.

"We'll get into this concept later. I trust you're hungry," he went around it, of course, and I only nodded slowly, trying to calm myself and followed him out as he shut the light off.


	9. Redemption and Deception

**So... Yeah.. I wanted to update before I left for my vacation, though I will be writing late at night there (Huzzah for RVing and electronic hookups!) I'll probably update again by the end of this weekend, so stay on the edge of your seat until then. **

**Tell me what you think as usual, and thanks for the reviews this time, they were awesome. Keep up with it and I'll keep up with the quick updates, seeing that I have the entire story mapped detail by detail in my head already. I love all you reviewers!**

**~The Phantoms Flutist~**

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_Chapter 9:_

_Redemption and Deception_

The days went by unnoticed to anyone counting, it was like someone hit the pause button on life for just a little while as we both seemed to wind down. Erik, I believe, sent away Anne and I knew this was going to happen eventually. He said she needed a break, and I tried hard to believe those words for once, but I honestly doubted it. Anne didn't do anything, like usual, and it was hard for me to cope without anyone to talk to except for Erik, so I found myself with my lips pressed shut for most hours except for lessons and sometimes, if I was in an okay mood, at meals.

Before I knew it, June breezed past and leaving us with July. The days were longer which caused me to go insane almost instantly. I put a chair next to the window in my room so that I could sit there and look out and read in the light of the blinding sun, which was hardly evident anymore because thunderstorms rumbled by often.

I found myself more comfortably talking to Erik who asked me questions of my past that even my former stalker didn't know, like what I used to do with my father before he became ill and what my mother was like and of what else I remember of my childhood and my early teen years. I didn't think I should ask him much on his history, but all was bottling up in my chest and curiosity never seemed to fail me.

"What did you do when you were in your teens, Erik? Obviously, you didn't go to school..." I trailed off, looking to him with my head tilted, and book resting on my lap.

"I traveled anonymously," He surprisingly replied informatively, seeming actually proud. "I had a mentor that I followed and studied with, and he was one of my good friends, actually..." He went on, looking off somewhere else as if remembering something horrible, "I studied architecture with him and together we traveled the world and I learned faster than today's ages. And then I came to the middle east before traveling to America and living here."

I nodded thoughtfully, raising my brows, but I never knew what I could think of when Erik was in the picture. He didn't describe the middle east, and suspicions arose, but he didn't want to share it and so I didn't think I wanted to know it exactly. It wasn't descriptive, but it was just enough to begin to understand him even more, causing less of the arising questions that were normally placed. I nodded to myself again and then went on reading my book.

"What are you reading?" He asked quietly, as he usually did when he wanted just one more word with me.

"_Pride and Prejudice_," I replied, "This would have to be my fifth time reading it." I added, smiling to myself. He didn't answer, and went on reading the newspaper, gaining the position of an ordinary man once more.

He wore a mask, yet he masked so much more than just his face. It was like he was a different man then when he had his face covered, and when it was covered, he was a gentleman that was simply begging for my attention and somewhat kind, but has his phases, and then when the mask was off, it was like everything bottled up inside comes out, and rages physically and mentally and he wept at my feet, begging for my mercy unto him... I'm not sure I could consider it just moody, it's like there's something hiding from me that he doesn't dare to show. There's a black hole in his past that's not revealed to me what-so-ever and by all means, he intended on not showing it to me. I didn't understand at all... how could a person hide so much? I couldn't certainly enough, I was a horrible lier when I don't actually mean to lie. Erik could pull off being an actor very well, I suppose, because it would take another genius to decode him.

It wasn't long before I began to think of how much I hated being kept inside, so the burning question had to let itself be known, days had already passed and I haven't breathed fresh air since that situation at the opera, and Erik's kept me locked up like his own personal singing canary since, making the lessons draw out longer and longer, and before I knew it, we were going on four hours a lesson. I was sick of it... I needed another hobby, something else to get my mind off of the world and being in this house was _not_ helping at all I don't care _what Erik thinks_.

"Can I go outside, Erik?" I asked after a lesson when he was closing the lid to the piano.

"No." He answered simply. My shoulders slumped over instantly and I groaned in desperation.

"Why not?" I asked, whining like a child.

"Because I said so," he replied simply dashing out of the room before I even said something more. That was the time I literally threw myself before he exited the room and I wouldn't be able to catch up with him after that. I grabbed his thin and bony shoulder, fortunately, and I saw the side of his face as he slowly turned around and looked at my hand as if it was something remarkable.

"That's not a good enough answer." I pressed demandingly. "You said you wanted to make me _happy_, and you know what would make me really _pleased_ is that I can see the sun for once without having to look through a window."

He sighed, glaring to my hand still as I took it off, "If that is what you want, I will please you. How about we eat dinner outside?"

I smiled victoriously, "That sounds wonderful, Erik." I replied, very excitedly, almost bouncing up and down.

"Meet me at the front door in thirty minutes, then, Christine." He ordered, and went off in some other direction when I went off to the living room waiting for that amount of time to pass, looking at the clock, as if it would move quicker by my staring at it. It was the slowest thirty minutes I've ever known, I think.

I laid down eventually on the couch, stretching my limbs all over the place and waited... and waited. I almost fell into a sleep-like state before Erik's cold hand seemed to startle me from the state I was in.

"Time for dinner," he pressed, and helped me from the couch and I slid from his touch once more, following him out the door to the outside.

Once outside, I let out a gasp. The sunset was stunning, as if an artist painted the sky with watercolors, as the warm sun was fading in the heat of July, leaving the earth a comfortable warm temperature, almost perfect. The smell of damp rain that had came before was fresh on the grass, though not too wet that my feet were soaking by the time we got to the garden.

Erik laid out a cloth in the center of a clearing in the garden and placed out a bowl of spaghetti and another bowl of sauce next to it, along with a covered plate of bread next to it, along with a jar of tea.

"Did you make this?" I asked curiously, knowing he probably dismissed the maid and cook together, it only made sense.

"Yes," He replied shortly, and grabbed a plate, making sure I was watching him, his movements grabbing my attention, acting like a puppy cautiously watching its owner.

"It looks delicious." I grabbed a few scoops of the noodle and poured the sauce over top of it and began to fork through it. Erik poured me a glass of tea, and placed it on a firm place on the grass for me to take. "It tastes very good," I commented, not wanting to be rude despite what I really felt like doing right now. I finished a serving of the spaghetti and leaned back onto my arms watching the rest of the sun falling through the trees. It was very beautiful, one of those rare moments where I was poetically comfortable of my standing for once. I think Erik savored it more than I did, for I felt his eyes resting upon myself every now and then and he would ask me a question and I would give a short answer.

He was so desperate, I knew it... I just right now couldn't bring myself to love another man more than I love both Raoul and my father. I honestly didn't see how I could love him, it was all too confusing and I barely trusted Erik... and isn't that what love was built upon? Trust? Not over-bearing jealousy, and keeping you locked up for safe-keeping.

I needed to escape Erik... I _really_ did. I just wasn't sure, exactly, how. I mean, it would take careful planning, and amazing acting to pull it off. I just needed to get him comfortable with the thought of me never leaving and then make my escape somehow. Who knows? Maybe he'll give me back my cell phone even in the act and then I could make my escape through there.

How could I dance on broken glass without bleeding was the question... How I could play with a harmful man's heart without breaking it enough that he'd be suspicious. It felt nasty and devious and something to use my free time on...

After all, I would return wherever I may go because I don't have any other place to go to except here, I had my belongings and clothing and all that... I could stay with Raoul if I got my cell phone back... maybe I'd be able to escape my fate altogether with Raoul by my side. It was risky and it made my heart pound with sudden agility, I felt faint.

I gained a stronger composure as I sat up straight, and looked to Erik looking at the sunset now as well.

"Will I ever be able to leave, Erik?" I asked, it was the same question as always, and it was begging to receive the very same answer.

"Maybe sometime," He replied, which was more reassuring then the definitely not I received before. But the maybe wasn't acceptable. Yes, looks about time to put my plan into action.

"Thanks for the lessons, by the way... I know I haven't thanked you before, but it's really great to sing again." I said full-heartedly for I meant it partially, just wasn't too excited with Erik acting as my agent for future careers.

He seemed startled by my sudden move to say something kind and blinked a few times before looking to me with those big, golden eyes. "Anytime, Christine. You know that I'd do anything for you."_ Sure_.... I thought to myself, rolling my eyes as I looked away. Well, that was the first step, at least. Now... what else could I do?

"Why do you love me, Erik?" Well, that wasn't necessarily a question that popped out of nowhere, I've been wondering it myself, "I'm not pretty... And I'm so young and stupid and naive."

"I beg to differ, Christine." He began, and I knew he was going to say something more, but he didn't. I waited patiently, hearing his mouth open and then shut in indecision. "You don't see yourself very well." Then maybe I don't _want_ to be pretty and naïve. Maybe that would end the horrible love story all together, and not have two men falling for me. What's this supposed to mean, anyway? One is slightly insane while the other is a childhood friend. Is God trying to say something, here?"

"We should be getting inside, it's getting dark." He began, and I was instantly frowning at myself that I could possibly have wasted my entire time out here plotting to fake affection in order to escape and now I won't be able to go outside anymore.

"Just a little longer!" I begged. He grunted, looking down to me and sighed.

"I can't deny you anything..." He sat back down on the same side and I watched as the sun disappeared into the horizon, leaving the sky with the beauty of the stars to overtake it.

"Look, Christine, to your left," He urged, pointing his finger to a spot in the sky where there was a fixture of light gliding its way through the sky.

"A shooting star," I breathed.

He laughed musically and then chided, "Make a wish."

I wished that my plan goes through well and I'll be able to see Raoul again and we'll be as happy as we were again... and I would_ kiss_ Raoul again... Oh... how that felt absolutely astounding! But I didn't let Erik know that I only looked like I was thoughtfully thinking and then sighed.

"Now it is getting dark, darling, we should go inside."

"I guess so," I replied, feeling very saddened all of a sudden. "Can we come back out tomorrow, Erik?" I asked, trying to be sweet.

"Whatever you wish, dear." He replied as if already set on his tongue. I smiled to myself as I rose from my seat to face him and he put all the things back into a basket and took it by the handle and led me back inside.

The following night we had a very decent conversation about... a lot of things, actually. He had a firm opinion as I had mine on particular authors classical and modern. We both were insanely stubborn when it came to quite a few topics like music, which was how we were alike in many ways, but it wasn't a subject that's easily livable... His stubbornness seems to drive me off the edge when mine most likely does the same. I couldn't help it... he was just a strange man. He wasn't easily likable, but I remember the words Mrs. Giry told me, "_You must grow to love people as they are, and take it in."_ I don't see how that's possible with Erik... But maybe... I could never love him as much as he loves me, if I could even love him to begin with.

"Goodnight, dear," he bid to me as I walked up the stairs automatically. I turned and looked at him for a good long while, and mentally shook my head in the negative.

"Goodnight, Erik," I replied slowly, and continued to ascend the stairs.

"I love you, Christine," He added and I didn't turn, I just went up the stairs, swallowing the sudden knot in my throat.

The following day was the same as before, though this time it was raining hard. A summer thunderstorm rolled in and swept the entire lawn in a big mass as it dangled and withered. I curiously eyed out the window, wondering what it would be like in my childish hopes to run around in the rain as it poured down. The taste of freedom was hard on my tongue, and it was there, just forbidden. I don't believe I could hold it up much longer. It was time to resort to plan B... begging...

I felt like I was swimming with my head ten feet underwater and upside down, hardly surviving in this home. The pitiful man was maddening... I needed time away and to relax and he _didn't _understand that much.

Erik was in the music room, composing for the first time in a while, and playing a few measures and then let out a disgruntled groan before going back and writing it down.

"Erik?" I asked from the doorway. I seemed to have startled him out of a sort of trace he was in while composing.

"Yes, dear?" He asked, turning to me.

"Sorry to disturb you..." I apologized coming to sit on the chair in the farthest corner and sat up with a business-like posture.

"It's nothing. What is it that you want?" He asked carefully.

"I was just wondering... if I could see another friend of mine. You know... Meg."

He grimaced and then looked at me with my hands folded and my muscles tenses on every inch.

"No," He replied simply and turned away. Not again!

"It's just Meg!" I replied, now sounding extremely desperate. "She has a car she could drive me back here... We'd just go to the mall and see a movie or something and I'll be back at whatever time you want me to be back. Just..._please, _Erik!" I felt like crying if he didn't give in.

He looked as if he was deciding! _Actually_ deciding again! This was something positive, looking me over, and I felt once more as if I was being put under an x-ray, studied almost...

"Before you say something, Erik, I know that you think by keeping me here close to you for this long would make me love you... It's nothing to be offending for you, but I do, eventually, need to be away. If you didn't know, all relationships need to be built like that..." I was very desperate now, I could feel my heart beating in the back of my throat which caused the world almost to spin.

He sighed, and once more looked me over, "Very well," He said slowly, and glared at me. "You must be true to your word, Christine."

"Are you serious?!" I asked aloud, jumping up from the chair, my eyes wide and startled.

"As long as you do as I say, you may be with your friend." He replied. I bounced over to him, not thinking very much through, and I wrapped my arms around his bony figure very quickly, too fast for him to even react, and pulled away, smiling very brightly for the first time since I saw Raoul.

He looked awestruck as I backed up to look up to him.

"Can I call her now?" I asked excitedly, restraining myself from jumping up and down.

"I believe it would be most respectful if you wait until morning." He commented dully. Well, great, now I won't be able to sleep tonight, I'm too excited to get out of this house! I ran out of the room and changed quickly into my night clothes.

I read for the rest of the night, as usual, though I sat staring at the ceiling until about midnight before sometime around then, I dozed off.

It was after breakfast that Erik gave my cell phone, finally, to me, and I opened it almost automatically to check through the history and see if Erik sent any more of those nasty text messages I never even saw, and nothing was there. That didn't relieve very many suspicions, but it was good enough for me to put it on good terms for me if I ever see whoever was threatened, accused, et cetera.

"Thank you so much, Erik!" I replied, looking at my old and worn phone in awe.

He didn't reply, simply staring at me, studying my movements. I dialed Meg's phone number in as I knew it by heart and began to walk away from Erik across the room for I felt his stare burning a hole on my back. I tried to ignore it as I spoke, and it was almost successful.

"Christine?" Meg asked tiredly. I looked at the clock... it was noon.

"Hey, Meg... sorry to disturb you if you were sleeping." I rolled my eyes, for it was expected of her to sleep in this late especially during the summer.

"It's fine... I haven't heard from you, so I guess that makes up for you calling me at this ungodly hour." She yawned. "Anyway... what's up?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the mall with me today and we could hang out... as we used to. See a movie or shop... or something. I just... need to see you." I explained quickly.

"Sounds great, Chris. I just need to take a shower and stuff, and I can pick you up." she sounded at least a little enthusiastic even if she was tired. It relieved me to know we were still on good terms even though I've been forced to neglect my friend.

"Want me to call Raoul up for you? I know he's dying to see you..." she added after another yawn.

I knew Erik was intent on listening, and I looked over to him and raised my eyebrow, my heart suddenly racing. I wondering if he could hear on the other end... He didn't seem to be attacking me just then.

"If you want, Meg, go ahead." I said, careful to not mention his name. "Also, you don't need to drive me, I have someone else... to take me. I'll meet you there at 1:30-ish?"

"Sure, Chris." She answered, now sounding with more energy then before. "Meet me in the cafe at Borders, .m'kay?"

"Sound great." I replied. "See you then."

"Yeah, then." She hung up before I could say much more. I turned back to Erik, trying to make my expression neutral.

"Thanks, again," I began, smiling again, about to lie if I must.

"You're not meeting that boy, are you?" He asked coldly. What do I say? What do I say? My acting skills were put on a test right then.

"No, he's busy with his business." I replied reassuringly, which was partially truth, it'd be a surprise to see him there in the middle of the week if Meg mentions it.

"I'll be watching," he assured, and my heart dropped.

"Do you not trust me?" I asked, trying hard not to beg again. I was already pushing Erik far enough. He eyed me as if I said something very stupid. "I'm going to take that as a no... Um... I'm going to go and get ready."

I raced up the stairs to fix my hair and change my clothes to something more presentable, washing my face and then putting on a little makeup to my pale face. I then raced back downstairs and met up with Erik downstairs.

"Christine," he began, digging through his pocket and produced something that he held into his hand. "As much as I want to be happy, I want to trust you," He explained, and almost had to pry my hand from my side, and I looked at his gloved hand touching with mine, and held his hand out, revealing a ring that he forced onto my left hand's fourth finger. I looked at it curiously, a plain gold ring and he held that hand in between his two hands, pressing it tenderly, and looking at the ring. What was he trying to say...? What was he proposing here? I wanted to smack his hand away and take off the ring but all I could do was stare at it with utter disbelief.

"You must keep this ring on and I will always be your friend. If, somehow, you were to take it off, then I will take my revenge." He sternly said and pressed his lips to my hand once more and all I could do now was stare at it in disgust, and began to back away, wanting to block him away forever. Was this some sort of engagement...? How dare he! I'm only seventeen... I'm _only_ seventeen and he has a consent of being my guardian.

"Come, Thomas is waiting," He instructed briefly and led me outside, putting a hand against my back as if that ring gave him permission to touch me more. I bent over and tried to get out of his grasp, sneering to myself that he had no intention of seeing.

Now... it was all mapped out in my head... Raoul was going to be there and Erik didn't know. Erik will be watching so I need to get Raoul so that he won't be watching... I _might_ be able to pull this off...


	10. Hide and Seek

**Haha... This was fun again. Thank you so much for the critique! I'm trying hard to please everyone, but I find that it's somewhat difficult with the plot I have in mind. I warned beforehand that it's dark and all that jazz but I usually write like that and my Erik is usually off-his-rocker... But yeah,you'll witness that much in this chapter :P. Tell me what you think once more, and I'll post the next chapter soon whilst on vacation for it just rained the entire day we were away so I had more than enough time to write. **

READ AND REVIEW

~The Phantoms Flutist~

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_Chapter 10:  
Hide and Seek_

The car ride seemed to be the longest car ride I've ever been in... the ring was strangely heavy on my finger, as if it burned my skin simply by staying there. I couldn't keep my eyes off of it, it was like a strange object but all it was is a ring. A plain, golden, yet very expensive-looking ring that could be all the more intricate, but it has its purpose. If I betray Erik today... yet keep his ring on my finger, will the outlook be not so bad if I fail yet again? Oh, the decisions. It was hard to restrain myself from crying looking over to Erik who was regally sitting on the other side, his head held high as if he just accomplished something major. _Ugh_... I thought to myself over and over again... _Why me_?

I wish I wouldn't come back. I hope I won't go back. I wish this _ring_ would come off my _finger_! I unconsciously toyed with it a lot, spinning it on my finger, but it never seemed to come off then, it was like it was stuck. If I tried any more, it might swell my finger and that would be very suspicious, of course, and the unwanted questions would come at hand.

We arrived at the familiar mall, the shops, the people excited me to no end, the ring held almost no damper on my delight. I couldn't wait to see Meg and Raoul's faces again, at least.

"Drop me off at the bookstore, right around the corner," I told Thomas specifically, and he stopped right at the Borders entrance. I stepped out of the car, and Erik grabbed my hand.

"I put some money in your wallet, I trust t would be enough, and I put my number on your phone in case you need anything," he explained quietly. "I trust you, Christine..." He whispered, pressing my hand firmly.

"I'm only seeing Meg, it's nothing big..." I rolled my eyes and tried to pry my hand out of his grasp again.

"I love you, don't forget that." He added as he let go reluctantly. I nodded to myself, and then slowly shut the door.

I tried to gain as much confidence as I can as I walked into Borders with the familiar smell of books and knowledge coming to mind. I smiled to myself, overjoyed to see this all again, in the favorite mall, in my favorite store where Meg and I would spend hours on end reading almost every book that looked somewhat interesting while having a cup of coffee on our right side. I went up the escalator, looking back to see the black car driving away, and saw the cafe with the familiar menu, and the repetitive faces loom before me yet again.

A brunette with a short pixie cut with her black hair and slim figure leap up from a table and raced over to me, careful of her coffee that sat next to a book. My heart fluttered as I was swept into the arms of my best friend, and she almost ran me over with her momentum.

"Oh, my God, Chris, where have you been hiding all this time! My mother says your living in a mansion, but I find that so hard to believe and then-" She stopped and grabbed both my hands before I could take them away. "What is this?" She asked curiously, holding up my left hand, and I looked away, my eyes glowering with exhaust.

"It's nothing," I replied taking my hand away immediately.

"Oh, but it is something because it's an _expensive_ ring... Is it Raoul's? Oh, my God, does he ever shut up about you! Christine this, Christine that... It _must_ be his! So soon..."

"It's not, it's my mother's ring... she gave it to me and I never seemed to find it until now." I excused quickly.

"I think you're lying!" She accused playfully.

"I think I'm not, and there's nothing more I can say. Meg, just let go of the subject and I need coffee."

She glared and then let go of my right hand. "I think people are staring anyway," She cautiously looked around and then patted my back again.

"Well, how's the living in the mansion? That's pretty odd considering whoever owns it is a foster parent." She noted speculatively as she waited in line with me at the coffee stand.

"It's... not what it's cracked up to be," I replied shortly, not wanting to get onto this topic. "Look, Meg, I'm serious. Can we just get off of this 'new house' ordeal? I just want to catch up with you more than I do me. I don't want to think about it." I said, rubbing the back of my neck nervously, waiting for her answer. She's more curious than I am...

"If that's what you want to do, that's fine."

"Thanks," I replied, feeling slightly relieved as I ordered my mocha latte, and smiled slightly to lighten my mood to the cashier.

I walked with her to a table where she had a stack of books spread amongst the table, and I stood at the emptied seat. How could I ask about Raoul without having to say it aloud...? An idea sparked in my head, and I grabbed my phone. I typed my question down on the phone and showed it to her.

_Is Raoul coming? Don't ask about why I'm using a phone.  
_

She arched an eyebrow and laughed lightly before grabbing her own phone and typed in her reply.

_Yes, but we're meeting him at the movie. I'm going to ask anyway... why are we using a phone?_

I rolled my eyes... once more, always curious.

_Because my guardian is... _really_ creepy... he's always cautious about me and him, so I didn't tell him he was coming_.

God, was it just so much easier to lie through words then speaking them directly. I smiled reassuringly and she nodded acknowledgedly.

_That _is_ kinda creepy... why would he care? _

_Because he does _a lot_._

_Is he young?_

_I think._

_Does he love you or something? Jealous games?_

"Meg!" I screamed aloud, slapping her hand playfully, adding more onto my lie. I didn't want to get more than one person involved with my plan. I mean, I love Meg as a sister and she's always been there for me, but she is horrible at lying.

"What? I'm just wondering!"

_If you say he's creepy, loving you would fit right along in there. Why else would you have stayed in one place like that for two months?  
_

"I know you better than that, Christine. Honestly. I can read you like a book. So... is it true or not? Did he give you that ring?" She asked lightly turning her head to the side, looking like a begging puppy.

_Yes_. I typed in shamefully, shaking my head and leaning it against my hand. _I don't know what to do_.

"Is it that hard?"

_He's supposed to be my _guardian_, Meg... _Well, that was part of the reason, at least. Not to mention he's insane, ugly, and pleads at my feet helplessly. He could be a very brilliant man if not for his face... and well, body. He would be handsome, and old-fashioned and something like my dream man if it were not for the megalomaniac details.

_I see..._ She replied furrowing her brow.

"Do you?" I asked, raising a brow sitting up straight.

"Not really, I mean how could you? If you need me, though, call me, okay?" She pressed, wrapping her arms around me once more.

"I don't know if I can... when I last went with Raoul, he took my phone away, when I get back," I grimaced inside my head, looking to my ring again, "He might take it away again..."

"That's stupid," She replied, sipping at the remnants of her coffee.

"Exactly what I said," I rolled my eyes, checking my purse just automatically to see if it was there.

"Want to start walking to the movies? I was thinking we could see something 3D... like that new Ice Age movie, or perhaps... Star Trek? I dunno, make your choice when we get there." She hinted as she lifted me up from my chair, always having a peculiar love for the movies.

I followed her out of the store and out to the theaters which was near the food court... I felt more cautious then ever before, considering I'd be with Raoul... and Erik had _no_ idea. What could become of me if he finds out? If he is watching right this very minute somehow in some way, then what will he do if he finds that I'm trying to get a way to escape? My heart fluttered already... I just needed to get to Raoul smoothly and effectively. Just as I thought of that I was immediately taken into someone's arms which weren't clothed in black, instead, bare arms. I looked up after letting out a startled gasp to see Raoul smiling stupidly down to me.

"God, Raoul! Just scare the crap out of me!" I exclaimed turning around, very serious, but he took it as a joke, laughing that laugh once more.

"Sorry, Christine, didn't mean it to hurt that much..." He laughed, shaking his head, and wrapped his arms around me, and for once, I felt safe... But not quite. Meg smiled, patting his shoulder just as good friends. We were all once together as best friends until Raoul and I were together much more, talking on the phone until the late hours and I went to homecoming twice with him before my father died. I love him as a brother and as a friend, and I don't think I'll ever let him go... I just _can't_.

"So... what movie will it be, girls?" He asked, wrapping his arm around my waist, my heart still pumping, looking around me repeatedly.

"I suppose it's up to Christine."

"Star Trek sounds fun," I noted lifelessly, looking for any figures in black again and again, but never found them.

"Yeah, that looks good," Raoul agreed automatically, looking at my cautiousness, and I looked to Meg for her not to say anything. Luckily, she didn't and we walked through the queue and ordered our tickets before going up the escalator.

"Are you alright, dear?" he asked into my ear as I looked over my shoulder while rising up.

I stared into his eyes and shook my head in the negative, my heart fluttering and I felt like I could cry into his shoulder right now.

"The man is insane," He whispered quietly so I could barely hear it over the loud voices in the food court, "You need to get out somehow..."

"I_ know_," I whispered, choking back tears. He rose up, straightening himself from looking around. At least he was as cautious as I was.

"How did you convince him to let you go for today?"

"I told him I wasn't seeing you." I choked, looking around me again.

"You're only calling for it, then..." He shook his head, "Christine you have to come home with me today, for a few days maybe, but I fear for you and this... _man_."

"I'm going to hurt him so." I whispered, shaking my head, thinking of him crying and pleading at my feet again. "I'm betraying him right now and he could be watching, Raoul, I'm so _scared_..."

"I know..." he kissed my hair as we walked into the theater place, and he took me to the popcorn stand, whispering affectionate words into my ear so only I could hear them to calm me and rubbed my back so I wouldn't cry in public. "Try to enjoy the movie. Just like old times, you know?"

"I'll try."

"Maybe he'll let this go."

"Maybe..."

We went into the theater with Meg watching us like a hawk and smiling stupidly from her phone and probably texting everyone she knew. I didn't care right now. I was busy taking deep breaths and listening to Raoul repeatedly whispering into my ear.

We found our seats in the usual middle, myself sitting in between them two, and they were talking as if nothing happened and I sat there possibly looking like a deer stuck in headlights, and watching the commercials, studying each and every slide.

"What do you think, Chris?" Meg asked, leaning over to me, placing her head against her hand.

"Sorry... I wasn't paying attention." I replied. She laughed shortly.

"Always in the opposite world." She replied, still smiling, beginning to stuff her face with popcorn as the previews began.

Raoul squeezed my hand again and I tried to pay attention to the future movies and to wrap my head around the movie as the drama began but I couldn't seem to. All it was to me was pictures, explosions, lights, and moving figures, and there wasn't any threat of any sort to Erik watching in the dark theater. I was almost calmed down when the most action began at the end of the movie, and almost had a hint at the intricate plot, but it was impossible.

The happy ending was dimly lit, the usual love story ended and they kissed happily ever after, and Raoul leaned over to kiss my cheek as he used to, as if to make me feel better about happy endings.

"He hasn't done anything," He whispered into my ear and then leaned further over before the lights flickered on, and sneaked a kiss on my lips once more, and I shut my eyes, taking more of it in before he pulled away. I couldn't help it but lean further over and kiss him back, for it just might be our last kiss... ever. I might as well enjoy it. I held onto him like the world was ending, and I couldn't stop looking into his eyes, his bright blue eyes that glowed as the lights came on.

"I'm so... screwed, Raoul," I shook my head again, and he rose from his seat.

"You know... that Captain Kirk or whatever... was _really_ hot." Meg sighed, as she wiped the popcorn from her lap and threw it lazily onto the seat.

"Shut up, Meg," I said playfully.

"I was just noting!" She smiled again. I looked at my watch... it was nearing four o'clock. I had a while before Erik was expecting me back. I smiled decently and walked out of the theater, Raoul's hand never leaving my waist.

"We could leave now, if you want." He muttered as we were going out to the mall, "Buy a few outfits and then we'll leave, and you could stay over for a few days until Mrs. Giry comes."

"I don't know, Raoul... If he were to find out, he'll kill you..."

He sniffed, "kill me?"

"I don't know... he was going to that one night at the opera."

"I could call the police."

"Do you honestly think that that will stop him? Don't even bother," I rolled my eyes.

"Trust me, okay? I'll get my brother in on it and everything, it will all be fine by the time I have this over. And you can stay as long as you want, and you'll be out of his sight."

"I'm not so sure about this, Raoul..."

He huffed and looked out the vast expanse of shops at every corner, "Just... go ahead and buy outfits. You have enough money, right?"

I looked into my messy purse filled with things that I hardly needed, including a brush, tons of pens that I've collected and other select pack-rat items and my cheap wallet, and inside that $2 wallet lied $100.

"Oh, my God..." I whispered.

"You've _got_ to be kidding me." Raoul said into my hair, looking over my shoulder. "You're not kidding, are you?"

"Hell, no." I replied and stuffed the money meticulously back into my wallet with a shaky hand, and looked to Raoul with large eyes.

"Banana Republic...?" Meg hinted sneaking up from behind, startling me again.

"Maybe," I shrugged, "Something cheap, Meg, I don't want to use this money, really. Department store. That's where I always get my clothes."

"Nordstrom's, then," She sighed and then we walked to the most expensive department store I've ever known, while feeling like if I turned around his glowing yellow eyes would be _right_ there and he would take me back to that damned house and lock me in my room and force me to sing like his little canary and I would find that purpose for the ring... and it could be _illegal_... I just wanted to run and never turn back, but Raoul's insistent hand on my back was something to keep me grounded in reality. This _was_ the real world, this _was _happening.

She took me to a section that she knew was cheap and began to hunt down clothes and throw them at me to judge, to the underwear, and to shoes for obviously one pair of flip-flops was not enough for a few days.

I was suddenly like the mall was instantly crowded, like people were filling the place and I couldn't breathe because he could be _anywhere_. I felt so exhausted at the check-out, looking probably as pale as a ghost and I handed the cashier too many twenty-dollar bills, and she looked at me strangely, as if I was some drunk teenager coming to the mall with her friends to keep her stabilized. I probably blushed as I walked away from the cashier and then looked around again.

"We need to hurry," I pressed, my heart thumping on my chest, looking to the clock on my phone for it was nearing 6 o'clock, and Erik was supposedly going to pick me up in thirty minutes where I left him.

"Chris, you look _really_ pale..." Meg said hurriedly, fanning me with a piece of cardboard.

"This is horrible," I added dimly, "I ruined this outing and it might be my last one ever..."

"Don't worry about it, Christine, we want to help you," Meg added rushing to the exit in the back of the large store, people surrounding me, and the world almost began to spin as my heart seemed to leap out of my chest instantly and take flight, and I looked around curiously, again. We were _almost_ there... _Almost_...

We were in the parking lot now, my bag falling into the large Nordstrom's bag and Meg was almost dragging me to Raoul's sleek Volvo. He opened the front door for me and helped me inside, and I leaned my head against the seat looking to the ceiling.

"Can I come with?" She asked. "I'll just call my mom and she can pick me up from your place," She added hurriedly, jumping into the back seat.

Raoul shrugged and got into the driver's seat, holding my left hand tightly.

"What is this?" He asked sounding just like Meg.

"Don't ask." I shut my eyes to block the light. Raoul grabbed a bottle of water from the cup holders near the seat and handed it to me, opening the lid and placed it near my lips. "I'm just too flustered right now, really..."

"I understand," Raoul said, placing the water bottle into my hand and I swallowed gulp after gulp into my throat and relieved the sudden burning.

He took off out of the parking lot racing by a few cars carefully, though, to not disturb me, as I seemed to linger on the point between conscientiousnesses. He reassured me over and over, and I lost count of how many words he said, and lost my mind between exiting the mall parking lot and heading near the highway. It was a peaceful, relieving sleep, dreamless and simply hovering.

And a rude awakening.

The car jolted to a stop on the side of the road and my head seemed to almost banged to the front and I awoke.

"Christine, don't worry... I was probably speeding or _something_." I looked curiously to the clock and then to the rear-view mirror to see a black car, once more with blackened windows with lights on the top, signaling it was a police car. My heart began to race again and I felt just like I did before I went to sleep, though it didn't seemed to be long, for it was only thirty minutes into the drive.

The gruff-looking policeman headed near the car and looked in to see us staring at him intently. "Do you realize you were speeding down that last road?" He asked in a strict New England accent, not pronouncing his R's, with a ragged beard and hat. He wasn't what you would begin to think of a police officer.

"Yes, I'm sorry, sir."

"Why do you think you've been speeding? I see you are a young driver."

"It's just... we're in a hurry." He looked to me, and patted my hand again, "She's very ill and we were heading to the hospital."

He pointed to the opposite way, "The hospital's _that _way," He answered, glaring his eyes.

"Nice move, Raoul," Meg hissed from the back seat. I gave her a dirty look and she shut her mouth.

"Chagny, are you?" The officer asked.

"Yes sir, I am." He replied in his charming-way with a tint of fear, "How did you... know?" He gulped.

"I've been commanded to arrest you for kidnap."

"Kidnap...?" He asked softly, looking to me with big eyes. "How could I have kidnapped someone?"

"Who is that next to you? The 'ill' one?" He looked to me with a thick eyebrow arched.

"Why do you need to know?" Raoul asked suspiciously.

"Step out of the car, Mr. Chagny."

"_What_?" He asked in disbelief, completely losing his composure and staring back to me again before looking to the threatening officer.

"You heard me. Now, step out or I shall take serious action."

"I didn't_ do _anything!" Raoul rebelled, which was obviously a stupid move, but how would he know? It's not like there's etiquette to being accused of something you obviously didn't do.

"You are lying to an officer and you have kidnapped Ms. Daae."

"She came with me!" he rebelled opening the door. How did he know my name...? I looked to the black sports car parked behind us and I think my stomach did a few back flips. Wait a minute... _that's Erik's car._

"You too, Ms. Giry."

Just as he said that, a black figure began to emerge from the familiar car. "I'm sorry, Christine!" I heard Raoul say, sounding as if in pain. I began to unbuckle my seatbelt, finding no other way, and I opened the door quickly, faster than I knew I could ever move. It wasn't hard to run... but it was_ extremely_ hard to hide. I ran up the hill of the highway which led to a forest, running and receiving scrapes on my legs, and branches tugged at my hair. But I didn't run long.

Frail, and bony arms were around me and I couldn't help but begin to rebel, pulling at my limbs to hold them from being restricted, but he was much too strong. It didn't take long for me to run out of my own strength, either, as he pulled me away towards his car.

"Christine lied to me." He said into my ear as he dragged me off into the car, leaving the "police man" there to fend for himself.

"Don't!" I hissed, pulling and reaching for the locked door but there was no use. I was in the backseat, and he, in the front. I pulled on the handle and banged against the window but it was not any use.

"_Christine _lied_ to me!_" He hissed once more, and glared at me. "She promised to return and that_ boy_ was not going to be there..." He was talking to himself in third person, "And Erik _trusted_ her... No, that was a mistake." He agreed with himself and drove even further away.

"Don't hurt him," I pleaded brokenly, shutting my eyes and began to cry once more into my hands. "_Please..."_


	11. Error

_Chapter 11:  
Error_

I wish I could go back in time and be convinced that this was a bad idea. The car was literally speeding down the highway, going around the cars, and I thought he may just kill us both. All I could do was bury my head in my hands and sob, looking away from the window at the dizzying feeling he's going to hit someone.

"Is he going to kill Raoul?" I asked feeling very guilty suddenly getting Raoul and Meg into this. Erik didn't answer, still very angry. "_Please!" _I sobbed. "Just _let me go_!" I hissed, cupping my head into my knees.

"Christine, _I love you_... I cannot let you go." He said quietly, and then I felt his eyes burn into the back of my head, and he pleaded once more, "Stop crying, Christine..."

I moaned, looking over to the window as it began to rain again, as if that sort of omen was my least wanted. It beat on the roof of the car as he drove, hiding my sobs and small groans as I rolled over onto the seat, scared of what he may do now.

"Christine didn't mean to leave her poor Erik, right?" He asked when I couldn't produce any more tears, I couldn't hurt myself more. I felt numb to the bone, as someone put this entire event on hiatus in the car. I didn't answer, looking out the window still. "After all I've done for you, all I've _provided _you, you still want to run away like an ungrateful _brat_!"

I didn't know what I was thinking, but I was starting to believe those heartbreaking words, painstakingly being impaled into my mind. It made no sense... He tried to make me comfortable in the most oddest ways. I'm just so _stupid_... how could he love me?

"I know you're better than that, Christine," He added gently, seeing my hurt, "You could have just told me... If it made you happy, I would have let you see the boy again."

"No, you _wouldn't_, Erik," I spat back at him. "You can't contain me like I'm your _pet_ who you teach to sing and claim for yourself. It's not your right even as a guardian!"

He didn't respond once more which began to make me angry. I rolled my hands into fists and I glared to him in the rear-view mirror, "You don't listen, either! You only hear what you want to hear." I accused sourly, leaning against the door as if it might just open that way.

The rest of the ride was silent as I thought over what more I could do against him, but there was nothing. A "police man" coming after us and accusing random things... if Erik could persuade someone to do that much, could he persuade someone to do even worse using that alluring voice of his? Definitely a man I could not play with fire with, and I was stupid and flustered of thinking otherwise. I've hurt him, just as I knew I would, and all he asks for is love... I still don't see how I could love him.

We were back at that damned mansion again, in front of it with its glowing elegance and Gothic style that holds so much in its walls that I couldn't bear it. Now I was caged back into it again, like a prisoner, and chained down with pity, and numb like I was put on ice for days on end. I felt drained and useless as I drudged into the warm house that was just as dull and lifeless inside as I felt. Walking through these doors not but three months ago, not knowing what awaited me which consequently I shuddered.

I should have stayed at the house with six children, an OCD mother and workaholic father that was just as moody as his wife. Or maybe the one with a 14-year-old brat who was spoiled rotten when I came to the house, and I felt like Cinderella doing the work that she was supposed to do. Anything would be better than here... I suppose it's cold hard facts that hurt the most right now.

Once we were through the door I began dragging myself up the stairs back to the familiar room that once was brilliant in the house that once held so much wonder. He didn't stop me, of course, and in fact, he followed me up the stairs and right when I stepped into the room, he slammed the door on my face and I heard the lock click. I was expecting that.

Now, I was lonely. Anne wasn't there to give company, Erik was angry, and I was miserable and tired and bewildered by just about everything. I'm not used to things changing this quickly, the air I breathe becoming strange... I needed to slow down for just two seconds and when those few moments are over, I was going to go out of my mind.

I slept for only a few hours into the early morning and then laid in my bed, staring at the ceiling, humming to myself random notes, that I didn't even know I was humming until the door began to open and my voice rose a little.

Erik walked in and placed the tray on the table and I rose from my bed, waiting for him to say something, and then he walked away, ignoring that I even existed. I grimaced as he slammed the door in my face once more, as I was intending on following him out, feeling slightly ghost-like.

I looked at the tray, my stomach grumbling, and began to chew on the bacon slowly, to give me something to do in at least ten minutes.

I resorted to writing things down in my journal, thoughts that have probably been mentioned before and possibly every detail I remembered on the mall trip to being torn away by Erik, though it was hardly detailed, I felt dizzy just remembering it.

I drew a few things... the ring on my hand, trees... a house overlooking the sea. Random thoughts that I sporadically placed on a sheet of paper. Even designs that I never knew I could finish until I wasn't given a choice.

I read my worn copy of_ Oliver Twist _which occupied a lot of my time, and fell asleep again for no reason until Erik came in to deliver lunch and then walk out. This time I had to plead for him to say something, _anything_, and he only brushed away my hand and walked out.

Surprised, I backed away, simply aghast... he was _that_ angry. I knew it was going to be this critical to our relationship, if we had anything, but it seemed to brush by my face in a violent way by just facing it head-on.

He ignored me for an entire day, only coming in for about twenty seconds for each meal, and then left without a second glance. I went to sleep without so much as a reaction from Erik.

And the next day... The same exact thing. I didn't know time could be so long and stretched out. I suppose it's just like what happens as they say in stories... time goes by so slowly, it's like watching a clock move in slow-motion.

I felt denied of everything without being able to turn back and say otherwise. I felt helpless and horrible, and so _guilty_. Guilty for harming Erik, for getting Raoul too involved and he could be _anywhere_ right now, dead or alive, and Meg being so involved. I keep calling myself stupid, but I don't know what I wanted to do, I didn't know who I should rely on. I didn't know what I could do for Erik... How could he want me anymore? I've turned him away so many times, I've denied his presence, I've stripped his dignity, why does he keep me here? How could someone such as him still want me here?

I looked at my eyes that were beginning to water in the mirror. I'm so _horrible..._

The next day, Erik found me laying on the bed, wrapped in so many messy sheets and mixed up between sleeping and being conscious at the same time. He shook his head, delivering the meal, and then began to walk out, and I heard him though my eyes were shut, his soft, cat-like footsteps turning away and it was enough to make me shoot up out of the bed, looking to him with big watering eyes, probably looking like such a mess.

He was just about to walk out without a second glance and I grabbed his thin bony shoulder.

"When can I come out?" I whispered and he tried to pull away but I grabbed onto both of them as if it was a life vest. "_Answer, please_," I whispered brokenly.

"Maybe sometime." His beautiful voice was whispering in my ear.

"Oh, Erik... I'm _so_ sorry..." I sniffed, wiping away my tears, letting go of his shoulder.

"Sure you are." He replied brokenly and shut the door, as usual, in my face and I did nothing but to blink. I wasn't hungry, I felt like I just dropped into cold water, shivering all over, and I slid down the door, praying to God to help me, praying harder then I've ever prayed before. I felt like I would hear something to answer my prayer, but all I heard was silence. Pure, maddening silence.

I shut my eyes and stayed on the ground until I got extremely uncomfortable and moved to my usual spot on the bed, my legs spread out amongst the messy sheets and my hair in a big knot around my head.

I decided to waste more time by taking a shower, and spending a while in the even more condensed space of the bathroom, which later converted into a bath and I lay in the water like usual.

The next meal, at dinner, Erik came into my room once more, and looked at me for a second with my wet hair and warm shower air floating around, and he paused, for once.

"Would you like to sing, Christine?" He asked quietly.

"Yes!" I replied almost too quickly and enthusiastically. I didn't care for the singing part anymore... I just wanted to get out of this room and talk to someone, as he's probably wanted of me for the last few days... to feel desperate. Yes, I can see it in his eyes.

I followed him, feeling like I couldn't walk right as I followed him out into the foyer, and I watched him move like a cat as if it was all new to me.

Ayesha passed along the side of me, turning to stare, glared, and then slowly moved away. Erik bent down gracefully to her level and pet her back affectionately, as if it could save him grace. I watched notedly, Erik and the cat that hates me so much who acts like a person, it was quite an interesting sight to see.

The cat hissed and walked by me again, running away to some other hallway. "Don't mind Ayesha," Erik noted, watching her walk away. "She just doesn't see you enough to get used to having someone else around."

I didn't answer to that, if he was wanting to spark casual conversation, why is he trying to hint it in now using a cat? I guess I was being too picky, so I only nodded, and followed him further to the room that used to be somewhat of a sanctuary before this entire ordeal began, now I didn't know what to think.

He handed me the familiar duet.

"I trust you can perfect it now," He noted as he played an improvised beginning on the piano. I shrugged and then looked it over once more, music being something I couldn't keep note of easily after all this time, denied of sound period. His lovely notes were very welcomed by my ears, playing with the beautiful feeling as usual.

When I heard him sing, it was like heaven was mocking me, that his voice was even better than yours and you don't need his love... His love that he expressed through his music, and that I couldn't begin to deny because it was _right_ there. I wished I could return the same affection but I thought for a second before I began to sing that... I wasn't _ready _yet.

It was hard to let someone else in after I've been denied my childhood love, and it was Erik who chased away every bit of childish fantasies which is good in a moderate way, but how could it hurt to have some feeling inside leave me if I hardly ever knew it? I didn't want to let go, but what choice did I have?

I sang the final note while thinking these things and I wondered if Erik noticed it for he turned right around and looked at me speculatively.

"That was perfect," He replied gently.

I blinked a few times, slightly puzzled for a second, and then looked at him, my brow furrowed. "_Really_?" I asked quietly. It was the first time I heard him say those words about my voice, the first sincere compliment I've ever had, and after all we've been through, he still meant it, I could tell. He _meant _it... I wasn't kidding myself when I thought he could possibly love me still even after I betrayed him ultimately.

I think it was then that I first noticed, as well, that we were completely silent, thinking almost the same things. "Okay," was all I could afford to say.

"It needs a few more technical details to be repaired," He rushed suddenly, turning back to the piano as if that moment never existed, "start on measure 50 where the crescendo begins." He added and I did so, as his voice complimented my own as it rose and fell and rose again, each phrase seeming to mean so much, and mine curiously following him, as if experimenting the honest feeling that he portrayed.

"Oh, that was beautiful," He said after the last phrase. I stood stupidly dumbfounded, and backed away slightly. "Of course you certainly do not want to hear that," He glowered at me.

"What?" I asked quietly, not at all understanding what was real and what wasn't currently.

"Leave, Christine... just go." He shooed me away, turning away and began to play something else that sounded like angry notes blasting on the piano. Beautiful, but furious...

I wished I could just read his mind for once. Just one small thought of what he may be thinking, and then maybe I wouldn't be shooed away because_ I_ could help him for once, but that wasn't possible. I've had this situation before... trying to help someone who refuses to be helped. There was a type of longing in his voice when he sang, like he tried to help me find what he was saying but gave up.

_So strange_, I thought as I shut the door, and remained in the living room, sulking on the couch, folding my legs to my chest, not thinking I could sob right now. I listened to his furious notes playing on the piano, which seemed to be combined into one piece that he has composed before.

It seemed like days until he came out of the music room to find me curled up on the couch, and staring right at him with a tilted head.

"I'm sorry," was all I could say, which made no sense probably, but it was the only thing I knew what to say that could be of any purpose.

"No... no, you're not." He shook his head, and walked away and I watched him leave, before reaching the door that he was about to exit he turned back to me. "Are you hungry?"

Just as he said those words, my stomach grumbled and I nodded in the positive.

"Your dinner is on the table, then." He replied and shut the door behind him, to what I guess was his room as he once labeled. I glared... he didn't want me in there. I didn't want to anger him again in fear of my life no matter how much he says he loves me.

I ate the dinner without him staring at me or trying to ignite conversation while I ate the usual excellently prepared meal. I finished not knowing how much I actually felt alone without him sitting there and being his awkward self during meal time. Usually, at other houses I've been to, I eat silently, looking at the either somewhat good or disgusting food, feeling unnoticed wherever I go. Especially the first home I went to.. I felt _dead_ there. Emptied out and deadened, beat up until I couldn't feel anymore mentally and in some cases, physically. Here, I was loved irrevocably, noticed, pampered, and taken care of and I was still not appreciating it. Erik seemed to need me, more then I noticed that I needed him.

I rose from my seat, feeling horrible all of a sudden, feeling so horrible, I had to grasp my sides to keep from falling apart. I walked out of the dining room, my stomach wanting to eject the food I just ate, sick to my stomach.

I wanted to see Erik again and wrap my arms around him for the first time ever, and sincerely say that I was so sorry for everything I've done.

I walked into the foyer and walked into the dark hallway that he has restricted me not to see... maybe if I apologized, he won't be so mad that I invaded as he's told me not to. I wasn't sure... my heart began to race.

I knocked on the door he went into before and got no answer.

"Erik, can I come in?" I asked, knocking again on the door.

"I told you to go away, Christine," Erik replied, sounding hurt and pained, as if something just got finished beating his frail body up. It was me, I knew it almost knew it.

"Are you alright?" I asked worriedly.

It took him another moment to answer once more. "Yes, don't worry about me..." He sounded even worse now, his beautiful voice degrading into something strained. I then heard coughs that sounded as if it was killing him alive.

Without another word of protest, I opened the door to see him hunched over on the ground in a very dark room with his mask off, grabbing his chest. He was next to this figure in the dark... draped in black. My breathing caught up with me almost in a startled gasp that could sound like a choke, for in the center of the room was a coffin... _A coffin_... I had to back away slightly despite the man's harmed outlook, but the better of me said to go help him, he was drastically hurt because of something.

I went to him slowly and knelt down beside the crumpled over, slender man who was taking in heaving breaths.

"Do you need some water?" I asked cautiously, and he looked up with those large golden eyes as if just realizing I was there.

"You know where the kitchen is," He supposed quietly and I nodded, careful that if I may touch him he might decompose right in front of me, for once, he was so fragile as a child. "And you know how to make tea, correct?"

"Yes. Tell me what to do. I want to help." I whispered, trying to sound strong for once, panicked in a way and sickeningly worried that he may die in front of me.

"There's a small collection of tea leaves near the tea steeper on the counter, make the Russian bag, please."

I nodded, and rose slightly, looking into his eyes so that he could tell I was indefinitely worried.

"Should I do something else? Do you need to lay down somewhere?" I asked cautiously.

"I'm fine right here, but I'd like very much for you to make that tea."

"Will you be fine here?"

"Yes," He replied quickly, shooing me off. I did as he told me, going into the door I knew was the deserted, yet very large kitchen, decorated with different types of stone and granite counters with silver appliances to match which wasn't very useful considering he never ate... I felt like a mother, almost as I searched for the tea steeper, and found the multiple bags of tea resting near it, all in different languages that I couldn't read, and some in English, so I found the Russian one. I opened the petite bag, and a smell of different spices came to my nose, it smelled delicious, but not something I would drink without any sort of strong sweetener. I shrugged for he didn't specify, so I simply guessed.

I grabbed a tea pot, and filled it with water from the sink, putting it onto the electric stove and waited for it to boil, massaging my temples for it all seemed to happen so fast. He could be in there dying and I can't help him... the poor man... But he slept in a _coffin_! There was no bed, there was that dreaded thing right there that was so disgustingly dark. I wanted to convince him somehow else to sleep , but I couldn't place words together.

The water quickly finished boiling and I placed it into the tea steeper, putting a few teaspoons of the leaves into the water and let it turn a deep brown, not exactly sure of how long to wait, since the directions were in French and my last French class didn't specify on reading cooking directions. I waited until the smell of the spices was the strongest and assumed it was finished, and began looking through many cabinets for a set of coffee cups or tea cups, or any sort of mug and eventually found them. I poured the freshly made tea into a simple white mug, and carefully walked out of the kitchen to find him laid out on the sofa, his mask back over his face, and coughing still very softly.

I placed the tea onto the end table next to where he laid, looking more at peace than before.

"I wasn't sure on how long to let it be, so it might not be the best."

"That's fine," he replied, grabbing the cup, lifting his mask above his malformed lips, and began to sip at it despite how hot it must have been.

I sat at the chair across from where he lay, careful to not break him again, so I suppose silence was best.

"It's the basket, isn't it?" He asked suddenly looking more distressed as he looked over to me with his dimmer golden eyes.

"The... basket?" I asked turning my head to the side... and then realized what he was talking about. "The _coffin_?"

"No, it's a Persian cat basket," he replied, seeming bemused.

"But... the shape... I know what a coffin looks like, Erik." I hissed unsteadily.

He coughed a gentle laugh and then looked to me with narrowed eyes, signaling he was smiling through the mug that he lifted to his lips once more. I only glared at him, not amused clearly.

"Fine, you curious little girl, you have me then."

"Why do you have it?" I asked slowly to him.

"One must get used to things for eternity even if it means being in them in life. We all must die eventually."

"That's so gruesome," I replied, not knowing what else, exactly, to say.

"Don't think of it as a coffin, dear... think what it must be like to a flea, possibly a grand palace!" He said with such animation that I had to laugh softly at the dark joke.

"Ah, see? I make you laugh, don't I?" He asked, laughing slightly himself. "Your father used to make you laugh, I'm sure, didn't he?"

I nodded, looking to my hands.

He lay there, resting his head against against his hand, stating thoughtfully at the ceiling.

"You could have just ignored me, you know." He said quietly, so quiet that I hardly could hear him. His voice once more losing the evident strength it once had not but seconds ago.

"I was worried," I rebelled, furrowing my brow, not believing he actually said that.

"You mustn't worry for me, then."

"I couldn't leave you alone... What happened?"

"I'm not quite sure, dear..." He then looked to me sincerely, his eyes squinted. "And..." He began, "Thank you."

I nodded and rose from my seat.

"Do you want me to get you something else?"

"Go ahead on up to bed, Christine, I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?" I asked cautiously.

"Yes, I'm sure. Goodnight, Christine." He replied quietly, and looked back to the ceiling.

"Goodnight." I replied and left the room to go to mine, and huffed, holding my chest to keep myself from crying once more. It was like nobody ever said those words to him, like nobody ever cared...

I walked up the stairs, hanging my head low, and huffed once more, looking back to the door as I heard another hacking cough come from the other room.


	12. ANywhere But Here

**I'm so sorry for the long wait and all. I've been busy with auditions and camp and all that jazz... This is relatively short because I've been uninspired of what to do next, though I have plans for further events, just not this one particularly. It might be a little dry because I wrote it on a highway once more, and I was distracted, and then late at night when I found time to write. So sorry... anyway, it's going to get better probably next chapter, but I'm afraid you may have to wait longer for that one too. Tell me how much it sucks, or you could compliment, I'm not sure... whatever you choose. Chastise me for being horrible on a chapter, I don't care. But REVIEW and READ....:P**

**'~The Phantoms Flutist~**_

* * *

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_Chapter 12:_

_Anywhere But Here  
_

Well, Anne eventually came back. Evidently what Erik had suffered through had been something like a heart attack which is what she told me as I sipped at my soup, casually leaning into the chair, feeling comforted for myself for the first time this week ever since Erik scared me like so. I didn't see him so much, though, he was laying on the couch or in his room, and when he saw me in the house, he would weakly begin a conversation and out of the heartfelt pity I felt for him, I nodded along with it, though I wasn't sure exactly what I wanted to say.

Anne was my company for the longest time, and I did things around the house with her because Erik never knew. I cleaned my dishes I used, helped make my dinner and learned off of her as she told me what to do. We were close friends, I knew, just because I didn't have anything to lean on except for a wall that seemed to blockade the world, but hold up only so long. When the afternoon work was done she and I would sit in the library and talk about anything. She would leave only momentarily to attend to Erik who she never gave any information to me on.

"Is he going to die, Anne?" I asked when she returned from the room.

"I'm not sure..." She replied, her head hanging low. "He's gotten over many illnesses, but he's aging because he doesn't maintain a normal system."

"What am I to do?"

"Wait..." She shrugged sadly, massaging her temples and leaned back into the chair once more. "Who knows... he may be back to normal tomorrow... Do you care?"

"I don't know," I replied softly. "He's taken me from my world and gives me more than I can ever wish for. How does this come with love, Anne? I can't..."

"You're young, you shouldn't be faced with this. I tried to tell him that."

"He only listens to things he'd like to hear," I added, rolling my eyes.

"It's all he's ever known. Like a child, almost." She noted thoughtfully, leaning into her seat and looking to the ceiling with a smirk, as if just remembering something she obviously didn't want me to hear for she didn't mention it.

"I don't know if I can take this any longer," I huffed, groaning to myself. "I'm not going to give in, even if he does survive... I value my sanity very much. I've lost so much that I've held dear, and now he keeps taking it away..."

"He loves you very much." Was all she said and I nodded.

"I know that." I replied slowly, "I pity him..."

"We all do," she said, nodding once more.

There was a slight rub against the door, and I knew, just in my mind without actually knowing, that Erik just heard everything we said, but it wasn't like he was going to admit it. He stalked in, graceful and strong as ever and simply sat onto the sofa, leaning over as he did once before.

"Are you any better?" Anne was the first to ask, rising from her seat next to me.

"Yes, Anne. You are dismissed." Erik said, waving her off with an elegant hand.

"You don't sound like it." I noted when she left.

"I told you to not worry about me, Christine. I'm perfectly able to keep hold of myself." He said, sounding intensified even though he was just sitting there.

I felt slightly aghast by his coldness, "I was just trying to help!" I hissed back at him, coming up from my chair angrily.

"I don't _need_ help!" He shot back, his gold eyes flaming.

I felt my cheeks warm up in fierce frustration, "Why are you _always_ so difficult!?" I threw down the book I was holding to the floor with a loud _thud_, my heart thumping in my chest. He was silent for a second, which seemed like forever, simply studying over me.

I wasn't about to stomp off into my room, either, so I stayed there, fixing my eyes on his beautiful ones that were no longer flaming, but seeming slightly perturbed.

"I'm sorry, Christine," He replied softly, bending his head low. "I didn't mean to lash out at you like that... I don't know what came over me."

I'm not going to say "it's fine" just to make him feel better. I gave some feeling toward him and he returned it with his own impatience. I only glared at him, crossing my arms across my chest.

"Won't you say something?" He asked quietly, immediately sounding perturbed by my silence. I held my lips shut firmly, and he rose from his seat unsteadily, outstretching an arm for me to take, but I only stared at it.

"Oh, Christine, don't be so angry at me. I didn't mean it!"

"Of course you didn't mean it!"

"Why are you being so fickle all of a sudden?"

"Why are you being a _jerk_?" I shot back, my voice raising as his was.

"I demand my answer first." He simply said deviously, crossing his own arms challengingly. _Because, yes, I care too much!_ I blinked a few times, still glaring and backed away stiffly, not believing my own words I just thought.

"I _hate_ it here." I hissed, to block out my actual reply disbelievingly. "And you know what? I'm sick of this whole changing thing." I began to sob, my own mood swings taking a sudden violent turn as I looked into his eyes. "All I wanted was my dad back again without him actually _being _here! I _didn't_ ask for these nice things, I _didn't ask_ for someone like you! All I wanted to be was left alone." The last part was a lie. _I want to be loved again_. "I'm just trying to be normal, okay...?" I thought for a second, for it was the truth once more, "Like you! I'm _just like you_ and I want to be a _normal_ teenager, with friends, and things that I can call my own. And I want to go to college, and be around people, not locked up here."

He stared at me once more for a good, long time earnestly and thoughtfully, though there was a hint in pain in his eyes at my outburst and time to speak my mind. I felt my heart still thumping, it being the only noise I could hear. Selfishness was only just a slight thought, but who was I to consider him back in?

"Is that what you truly want, Christine?" He asked so softly and dully that I hardly understood him.

"What I've been wanting for these past two years and I never got it. It's not _fair_ and you're making it worse!"

"I didn't mean to make you feel this way..." He sighed silently.

I covered my mouth, not believing I actually said that. He could be dying and the last thought of someone he loves could be me doing this to him. I felt horrible, the familiar pain seeming to stick through my chest and in the back of my throat.

I was sniffing, though I didn't have any tears coming out, I fell to the closest seat, and hung my head low.

"It's not your fault entirely, Erik. It's not."

"Then who else would hold the burden?" He asked painstakingly, shaking his head over and over, seeming to try to decide something angrily.

"God." I whispered quietly, for it was he who gives and takes life away. He was agreeing with me as well. For a moment, it was awkward at finally agreeing on something.

"Then do you hate me so that you were not to give _me_ another chance?" He suggested.

I wasn't going to the damn foster home now, just thinking about it made me shudder. I would be even more alone then I am here, and at least Erik cares, not some husband-deprived widow, watching over a group of rebellious and deprived teenagers that I felt like I was beginning to be. That wasn't the first step to becoming normal.

"Must you leave me, Christine? You only have to stay with Erik for a few more months and then maybe you can leave when he's gone," He implored, coming to me and taking my left hand in his and looking at the ring idly, along with the entwined flesh that seemed so sacred to him right then. "I love you more than life itself, and I'll do anything to make you happy again, but I'm afraid I might not survive too long... It will be very short, Christine, and Erik can make you the most happiest of women if you just give Erik another _chance_... I've been so lonely without you here..."

Right now, he needed me more then the world did. I haven't left a mark on it thats worth while, I haven't done something that could change someone else's life except for maybe Raoul. Meg had other friends and even a boyfriend to keep her happy instead of me, and Raoul had a business to oversee as he grew, and an aristocratic family to please. I had no one _except_ Erik... Which isn't what I wanted, but it's a start. He said he'd be _dead_ in a few months, basically, so what if I do have some sort of feeling toward Erik? Would my own life be able to afford one more loss?

The only possibility is to not feel anything, and just be there. I've done it before. I've done it to every family I've been to. It's not God's fault, it's my own... I just won't let anyone in because I'm frightened for my life they might just back right out... I _can't_ do that_. _

I looked at his thin, bony hands, and took in a deep breath. "Yes..." I replied quietly.

He tenderly pressed his shapeless and cold lips unto my skin, for the second time, I was moved, somehow, the dying man was kissing my hands over and over again, and it burnt a hole right through me. I had to look away without him noticing, I just, simply, could not handle it.

In my peripheral vision, I saw him turn his head up with a light glance, into my eyes, that were smiling, "You're so good to me, Christine, so good... And beautiful, I do not deserve any of it... But I love you _so_..."

I forced a smile, though I was really dying inside, falling slowly, sinking into the ocean that I should never have treaded in anyway, my feet being tied together and sinking upside down. I had no way out of it.

"We shall do anything you wish tonight. Anything at all."

I shrugged, looking horrible as the two-faced thoughts flew through my head, and I shrugged for my voice would probably voice something I wish would not be seen.

"Oh, but I insist you choose, darling, I can take you anywhere."

"I don't... want to strain you..." I replied softly.

He gave a small chuckle coming to his feet to his tall posture, and I shrunk away. "What does it matter, Christine? I could live fully with you by my side."

"Well..." I began shortly, already sounding as lifeless as I felt. "What would you like to do?"

"How about a walk through my garden? Does that sound nice?"

"Sure." I replied quietly, nodding... "That sounds good, Erik."  
____________________

Erik was like a dog following my feet, cautious of everything he does wrong and throwing himself before me and asking for complete forgiveness of his horrible actions and anger, and he says it's not really like him to do so. It wasn't too horrible for I felt absolutely nothing, though saw everything, and said things that I should never say.

It was like taking care of a child, though, telling him not to do things... like plead. It only made me feel horrible when all he wanted was my intimate satisfaction with him.

I only wish that somewhere in my heart I could return the passion that he lets me feel.

At night, he sings for me, and in the evenings we go out for walks about his garden and our conversations were small because I intended on remaining silent. And in the afternoons we would sing together, which seemed to be the only enjoyable time for myself. I believed it was only the way I was acting which led him to be this open with me. Acting as if I loves him back, and such, though I'm sure he had no real way of telling. Lying is such a horrible sin, you see... I could no longer bare it.

The days went out longer and longer and it seemed that there was no real end to them, except for the time when I felt like resting my head, whether it be on his knee as he'd lovingly stroke my hair with his long and slender fingers, thus feeling weird as it went along my back, sending small chills up my spine, but, in a way, it was comforting for my dad used to do that when he tried to calm me down when something went wrong.

"Christine, could you repeat that last phrase?" He asked sweetly, turning to me expectantly from the bench. I nodded, breathed in, and did as he instructed. I finished, and looked at him dully and he stiffened from the bench.

"No, that can't be right." He shook his head, and played the piano part to himself and then looked to me earnestly. "That wasn't good, try again."

I did so simply and effectively.

"Where's your emotion? Try once more with _feeling, _you're starting to sound dead." He insisted, and waved me off with a simple gesture of his finger.

I sighed and sang it again. He grunted with utter dissatisfaction and played an angry chord on the piano, as if he was a child about to have a fit.

"You're singing to one that may die if you are not to see you again. Right now you're telling them to just go ahead and die, and you're indifferent."

He said that in such a strange and comical way with his voice that I had a ghost of a smile when he finished and gave an exasperated gesture as a showman would.

I nodded and I think he smiled as well, and began to play a few bars before the phrase and queued me on.

"No, no, _no!_" He angrily shouted, throwing me aback, stunned at his sudden outburst once more, "With _feeling,_ Christine!" He emphasized once more and then seemed to notice my evident silence and indifference that I honestly never seemed to lose throughout this entire lesson, and just now he was realizing it. If he wasn't paying attention to his student's voice then what _was_ he paying attention to? My thoughts wandered about when he began his speech about how I need to put emotion in or else all this training won't matter.

Then only thing that he said that I seemed to have notice was the sincere question, "What do you feel right now, Christine?"

I looked at his speculatively, arching a brow.

"Tell me and I won't judge. Just _sing_ your feeling, you can toy with the story all you want through however you are currently." He insisted.

"I feel..." I began dully, sounding like a rag doll, I thought, who just had a button pushed to speak. "I feel angry..."

"Yes... and...?" He added as he began to play the intricate introduction to the piece, and it was like the first time ever when I saw his fingers move over the keys, lightly touching each one with his long fingers that were strangely mechanical.

"I feel... aghast..."

"Go on," He pressed, making the music into something flimsy and it was like wind was blowing it around... aghast...

"I feel... awed."

The music turned regal and triumphant still using the same melody as before. The beauty swept me up, and the sudden curiosity that's been hiding for a while now seemed to come out as if it was over pouring from my chest.

"I feel hurt, I feel horrible, I feel guilty, I feel lonely..."

"What do you want?" he questioned over the music.

"I want music, I want my father, I want my friends, I want to be on stage..." I trailed off closing my eyes tightly, "I want to leave though I want to stay here, I want to be with you, I want... I want..."

"Sing!" His godly voice roared over top of the grand finale of his supposed introduction, and I opened my mouth and began the piece, my voice filled with all the thoughts that rushed toward me in a sudden gust of epiphany.

It went by too quick, though I was lightheaded and dazzled at the same time as I almost fell back from the last high note.

"That's better," He said out of the silence, "You must do that more often."

"Ouch..." I whispered to myself, massaging my temples.

It was agonizing silence once more, when he finally looked back to me, leaning onto the couch for support.

"But did you mean all of it?" He asked, sounding hopeful for me to say yes. I tried to remember what I just said before I sang, and then it hit me once more.

"Oh," I sighed, "Maybe..." I shrugged carelessly, letting my shoulders lag.

"You... you actually... want to be with me?"

"Is that not what I said?" I dryly commented pushing it aside carefully, trying to slide through this horrible conversation.

"I..." He wasn't sure, which was the first time he showed it so freely. "Never mind." He hissed back, and then quickly pulled out another piece of music.

And that, as I told you, was the most confusing lesson I believe I've ever received out of all of them.


	13. How Tragic

_Chapter 13:_

_How Tragic_

I seemed to have lost myself in fantasy. It was like I began reading some tragic tale that is romantic and disgusting at the same time, and never came out of that world. I actually said, on a bravado of words, that I wanted to be with him since many weeks ago, I was convinced that he was the demon of my life. Erik... is quite possibly the challenge of my life, if I'll even receive a life after I leave here whenever that may be. He's shown me irrevocable love and admiration and never ceased to leave my side? Have I finally come the conclusion that I actually might feel something back?

No.

Well... that's what I keep _telling_ myself. Of course not. He's much more passionate, and it's like I'm at a loss for words anymore whenever he admits several times of the amount of adoration and love that he feels for me, and it seems that he reached into my heart and pressed on it, squeezed it, and made my stomach do a few weird tricks.

I denied it, of course. I denied it and pretended not to listen at night when he would sit by my bed and sing to me a lullaby. In fact, I almost had myself convinced I still hated him for locking me up here until this one day when he grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him. I had the usual urge to squirm out of his grasp again, but something told me not to. He pressed his masked cheek near mine, and his covered lips nudged it, as if to kiss it, but reluctant, frightened. I grimaced when I thought he wouldn't see, but walked away feeling strangely buoyant. It was such a strange moment, though somehow calming.

I rushed to my room, of course, and tried to figure out some way in order to convince myself indefinitely that I don't actually love Erik. I found myself slouched over a writing desk, jotting down things over and over again, each time being forced to crumple the multiple pieces of paper into my hand and throwing them to the small trash bin near the bathroom door.

The only idea I came up with, using a notepad of paper was just to write a note to Raoul... oh, how it hurts to think of him again, with the thoughts of Erik on the same whim. Were he to find this... well, maybe he'll be convinced as well. I wrote perhaps the cheesiest lines yet, but I wasn't an expert at this admitting thing like Erik, either... I wasn't put here to be an author, anyway. But the words I wrote were utterly true, of course, I meant every word and that I wished to see him once more in a more comfortable place, without worries of Erik behind my back.

It was there that Erik found me, writing it, and a sudden fear came over me of what he may do if he were to find what I said. I made my signature at the bottom of the note, and folded it quickly, stiffening at the feeling of his presence when he stepped near.

"Good evening, love, shall I interest you in a walk?" He asked and I turned and gave a small smile, tucking in the note into my jeans pocket.

"Sure, that sounds good." I replied almost too enthusiastically, which was my mistake. I began to clutch my back pocket nervously, swallowing the entire nerve down my throat, but I couldn't seem to rid of it as my heart thudded against my chest.

"What is it?" he asked cautiously, almost sounding nervous himself. "You sound a little excited... is everything alright​?"

"Everything is fine..." I assured, using my best acting skills to comply.

"No... there's something wrong here... are you _hiding_ something?" He asked in a strange tone, looking behind my back, tilting his head, as I rose from my seat quickly

"Really, I'm fine. Can we go now? I think it's just being stuck in this..."

"Show me." He demanded calmly.

"Show you _what_?" I spat back, acting angry that he was being testy again.

"I know you're hiding something. You are not fooling me, Christine. Show me what you're hiding."

I swallowed hard and looked firmly into his beautiful eyes. "Why must I show you if I actually did have something behind my back right now"

"_Because_, my dear, sweet Christine... I _am_ still your guardian." He furtively chimed, possibly smiling beneath that mask from his. "I am not in the mood for games tonight, Christine. Do you mind showing me, or must I pull it out of your hands, and I do not believe you will enjoy that."

I grimaced and my hand remained firm on my pocket, and glared at him firmly. I was only protecting him, and he insisted. I'll try as much as I can.

"_Please_, Christine, we do not have all night when it's getting darker by the second." He pressed, trying to sound more kinder with his words, I only pressed my lips firmer.

It didn't even take a second for his arm to swoop down and grab the note out of my clutched hands, and he grabbed it so forcefully that I gave out a pained cry. Realizing he was just about to read it, I almost cried, "No, Erik!"

He straightened it out and only glimpsed over it before glaring to me with more than anger. There was something like betrayal in his eyes. Something I never intended on being faced with twice.

"_Read it_," He seethed grabbing my hand and forcing the note into my hand, and his bony fingers were very hard against my skin as he forcefully put it into my hand, I gave out another yelp. I think it was then that my eyes went blurry at the pain in his voice, and I _really_ didn't want to do this to him again. I was just so slow as to not plan ahead when I thought of doing this. "I said, _read it_. Go on. Enlighten me, dear, for I do so want to know how you feel for that idiot boy, what he could possibly hold for you."

I shook my head in the negative, wiping away the few tears with a finger.

"You'll never see him again, you may as well continue, darling." He hissed.

"No, Erik... I-"

"I know what you're trying to do."

"No, you _don't..." _I sniveled.

"Do as I say, Christine. Read the damn letter to me!" His voice took me aback, and I couldn't take it much longer, so I broke. I felt like I could fold over at any time, as I gripped the tortured paper in my hand accordingly and opened my mouth to say the first few words.

"Dear Raoul," I began, sniffing again, hiding my eyes further into the paper so that I couldn't see his eyes. "My dear Raoul..." I said, adding effect. And I believed right now I could lie with the added effect, "I do not wish for you to worry for me so," I added, which is quite contrary to what I actually wrote. "I am perfectly fine where I am with my guardian..." I looked up to see his eyes fixed right on me, and I shriveled up even more, taking a deep breath, trying to feel more calm. He looked fixed to kill something, or punch something... I saw that look before he attacked Raoul. "I only wish that you would find peace somewhere else just as I have. Your dear friend, Christine." I ruffled the note in my hand, and Erik bent down to retrieve it.

"Do not lie to me, Christine," He was strong for one moment "Do not deceive me," but then... "How could you?" His voice broke on the last word, backing away, reading the actual note over and over with his eyes and I had no way of saving him from hurting himself again. I only could stare and sob... just like I've always been able to do, without any way of fixing the situation. There was something shining in the light as it fell from his eye hole in his mask, and I noticed it was a tear. Oh, his tears... how could one man's tears hurt so much?

"I didn't..." I whispered so low that I was sure he couldn't hear me, but he did, surprisingly enough.

"Sure," He replied dryly, letting the beaten note drop to the ground by his feet. I heard a soft sob come from him, and we were silent for a second as he wept in front of me, and I could only stand there just like before. Suddenly, and so suddenly that I gasped, he fixed his composure, and straightened himself out.

"Well, then..." He began with an acidic tone in the background of a strong angelic, yet still broken voice, "If," He said simply, "You desire you be here as much as you just said you did..." He then reached for my hand, and looked at the ring idly, stroking it over with his thumb as if it may just save him, squeezing my heart violently. "Then it is all the more sense to make it... official."

My eyes widened at the comment, and I tried to draw my hand away, but he only grabbed it more firmly, pressing me closer one more time, his hand coming behind my back. He stretched my fingers out and then fingered for the plain golden ring on my left hand, taking it off. "You still wear it, just as I told you to..."

I nodded, still trying to back off, not caring for the ring, but it was beginning to hurt with the amount of force he used on my wrist. He placed it back onto my finger lovingly, and looked up to me, still wide-eyed and tensed.

"Then, darling..." He said simply, "you shall be my bride." He pressed on my hand firmly and let go, as I almost fell to the ground.

"_What_?" I hissed.

"Have a good night's rest, my love, you have a big day tomorrow..." And with that alluring tone, he swiftly left the room with a quick pivot of the foot, slamming the door shut. I ran and banged on the door screaming at it.

"You can't do this! You just can't! Oh, _please_! Erik!" I begged at the door, falling over, feeling my world suddenly spin around me. I tried the doorknob to see the slightest chance that he might not have locked it. But what was my luck, anyway? "_You can't_!" I screamed so loudly, and fell to the floor, sliding down it, looking at the damned piece of paper sitting across from me, and I wished I could just take a match to it. Burn the paper into ash and maybe, if I'm lucky enough, take me and my idiocy with it, consuming me into the flames. That wasn't possible. Erik's not a stupid man, if I know that much, why would he put a lighter in here...? Or any other sort of sharp object...? Surely he must know that he's already driving me up the wall of insanity that would actually force me into a matter of that.

I erased that insane idea from my mind and began to pace the room back and forth, sobbing loudly, moaning to myself, and thinking.

I could escape.

The window.

I rushed over to it as quick as my feet could take me, and began toying with it, to see if it just may open, and I used as much muscle that I had, but it didn't move. Simply shook. I banged my fist against it hard and it didn't even make a crack, but I believe the fist did. I leaned over and fell into the nearest support.

Surely he didn't mean I was _actually _going to be married to him, did he? That's not possible... he's my _guardian_... I'm only _seventeen_! He can't ruin my life like this so quickly!

I only had to take a second of calming down somewhat to realize I was turning _eighteen_ soon... and thereafter, it wouldn't matter who the hell the man would be, if he forced my hand into marriage, I was lawfully wedded to him, even if he may be insane and ugly, and... I don't know... but I did _not _want to be married.

I didn't sleep that night, my thoughts were overflowing with bitter things, and sad things about how I would never have someone actually romantically kneel to his knees and ask for my hand in an ideal landscape as most girls would dream. I don't even get to have a say in the wedding!

I felt sick to my stomach as the world took full throttle and seemed to crash before my very eyes. I took off to the bathroom, opening the lid of the toilet quickly and throwing up dinner... It wasn't a pretty sight and I didn't feel much better after that, just simply drained of any source of life in me, and I had a clouded vision take over quickly.

I couldn't sleep for at least an hour or so, curled into covers, I heard the door creak open, and the familiar dark figure in the dim glow of my lamp was there. I rose up from the bed, and began to crawl away quickly, though it was dreadfully hard considering I almost fell over.

"Get away from me!" I hissed. "You monster! You creep! I don't want to see you again!" I spat angrily.

"No, Christine... sh..." his voice was more powerful then my will. He came closer to me as I lost my very point of consciousness, taking me into another one of his lullabies, and all I remember of that night was looking to Erik, who weaved his fingers through my hair sweetly, and bid me tonight, calling me his lovely bride and I was too weak under the power of his voice to rebel.

I awoke too early in the morning, though my heart was pounding when I awoke. My eyes widened, feeling shot down slightly, worn out, and breathed through like something hollow.

_I was to be wed._

I swallowed hard, feeling myself already beginning to hyperventilate, looking at the bed like it might just bite me, and jumped off the bed, as if it would just swallow me whole. I felt sick to my stomach once more and repeated the same action as the night before, letting it flush down... and I shut the bathroom door, pressing my back to it. My hand rose to my chest as if it would pause my heart, but I think it sped up.

I leaned my head against the door, and buried my head into my arms, scared that Erik may come into the room. I eventually found myself once more at the sink, trying very hard to get the ring off... Erik took it off easily, so why couldn't I? It didn't work out, my only outcome was that my finger was a swelling red and ugly. I gave out a moan and fell to the floor, exasperated.

"Christine, darling? You must start getting ready." Erik's voice was in the other room.

"You _can't_ make me do this!" I screamed at the door, holding my fist to it in case he may try to break in.

"I beg to differ, dear. You _will_ do this. You've hurt me, Christine, this must be your punishment if you say you would like to be here, despite."

"You're wrong! This is wrong! I'm only seventeen, I can't get _married_!"

"Once more, I beg to differ. You are able to get married if your guardian grants permission. Strange thing is, I'm your guardian." He said with such acidity, that inside, it burned in a way.

"This isn't fair!" I seethed, banging on the door.

"It's sad to say life isn't fair, now please, we do not have all day. Anne will be in to help you get ready. I'll see you soon, Christine." He bid me farewell, and I couldn't help but bang on the door one more time, feeling completely hopeless.

He was taking this too far... Of course, he would take this too far. Isn't that what Erik does? Over-react to just about anything? It makes sense for my stupid mistake when I wrote that note for strict purposes for him. When one would usually take this whole confused relationship and try to help it, instead of pick at it until it brakes, and try to take it to what they wanted instead of push it over and watch it crumble as he probably just did.

I shut my eyes tightly, letting the tears dry out. I know I can't go against it no matter how many ways I try to fight it. I dragged myself out of my bathroom, looking to see over the chair, a dazzling white dress, which was no doubt...a wedding dress, with rose patterns embedded the entire dress with beads to outline them, and a large sash that wove into a train, with a tight-looking feel to it. I swallowed hard again, figuring out this was his... doomed intention for me all along. He thought I would fall in love with him enough to marry him, or perhaps not. Perhaps it's been with him this entire time.

Anne came in, looking dreadfully paled and flustered. Without saying a word when she came in, she pressed her lips firmly and began to the bathroom, taking out a pearled comb and brush, looking as if she just killed something. She placed the two objects onto my dresser and signaled me to come over without a single word.

"I can't believe this." She whispered in my ear as she helped me strip off my shirt, hanging the dress on the door of my closet.

"I can't do this..." I replied with the same amount of softness, swallowing hard again so I wouldn't break down. My stomach was doing its own gymnastics routine as the dress came further and further over my head. I_ never_ wanted to be married like this... not in a million years. My father or mother would never want this for me especially the same as goes for the man whom I was to marry.

"I'm afraid you have no other choice," She muttered as she began tying the corset-like backing to the dress, forcing me to take in heaving breaths, and I had to hold onto the bed railing to keep my knees from wobbling so I would hurt myself even more falling to the ground.

"How long has he been planning this?" I asked suddenly.

She didn't answer as she fanned out the skirts around me.

"Anne!" I pressed desperately, now choking on restrained cries.

"A while," was all she replied, sounding nervous.

"And you never told me!?" I hissed, "I could have ran when I had the chance... I could have been stronger before... why, oh why....?!" I moaned, taking my face into my hands, and shaking my head over and over.

"He would have my head if I told you, and he would have it again to know that I am speaking to you. He wished for me not to," She rushed quickly, pressing a finger to her lips, and with the other hand, patted my back with a motherly care to her.

I groaned again, coming out of her touch angrily.

"You must calm down..." She said, grabbing me by my shoulders fiercely, "_Please_, just _calm down,_" I did so, looking into her fearing eyes.

What if I don't say "I do" and instead, the opposite? Would he simply kill me at the alter and put up with the disgrace? Would he turn away and never come back...? I began thinking those sorts of things in my mind as Anne toyed with my hair, looking to my red-faced self in the mirror. I don't think I'd be able to manage the type of embarrassment in front of a priest and in front of God, I'm sure that's an utter sin. But isn't being married at a young age just as much of one as anything?

I felt like I was drowning in a tide, being pulled, completely exposed and neglected out to sea forcefully, once more by my ankles.

"How can I get around this?" I asked.

"I'd advise you not to." She replied briefly.

"And why not?" I almost screamed.

"Christine... he has told you he loves you and will never harm you, and... you've harmed him in so many way unimaginable... you're only doomed to stay here longer if you turn him away. Your own sanity depends on it."

"If I hear him say those damn words one more time I'm going to explode into a thousand shreds!" I exclaimed, possibly sounding small, still, not even meaning the words entirely.

"He can be a much better man if you try hard to let him show that side to you, you know... he's truly a good man somewhere inside that is far from reach, you see."

"Wherever that may be, and if I find it, I'll let you know." I spat, and Anne backed away revealing my hair which was now partially pulled into a bun at the top of my head with a few loose and curly strands hanging down, and in a pained and guilty way, I actually thought I looked kind of beautiful.

"Your shoes are by the door." She hastened, taking the veil from the top of the vanity, and pushed the comb into the bun, letting the veil fall behind me for now, I suppose. I never really carefully studied weddings, I suppose I wasn't to see Erik before the wedding so I could give him a piece of my damned mind! I wasn't supposed to see him only because it would bring bad luck to the "couple." I shuddered at the word.

I put the sandal-like shoes on my feet, feeling extremely awkward in such a dress as this. The last time I wore something this fancy was for homecoming with _Raoul _and I remembered that cute boyish blush as he looked at me for the first time at the clichéd bottom of the stairway, looking up to me with an outstretched arm, ready for me to take, and a cute smile on his face. I chased the memory away angrily, not wanting the extra pain.

We stepped out to a beautiful morning, a different car waiting in the rounded driveway. She got in first, wearing somewhat formal clothes for the occasion. I felt like I was floating the rest of the way, lost in angry, saddened thought.

We arrived at a small but pretty chapel. I wasn't paying attention enough during the drive to know, exactly, where we were.

We walked through a doorway which led to a small lobby that was entirely empty, of course, not decorated in any stupid fashion, and for that I was grateful as I try to not think of it more than I am already failing.

Anne left me then, telling me to go when the music reaches the beginning point after the large crescendo. I blinked and nodded, feeling tears already starting to come to my eyes.

It was all mostly a blur once the music began to play in the chapel, it was beautiful, but clumsy, played by the small organ that filled the small place with sound. I don't remember even walking into the chapel, but I was awed by the gorgeousness of the old-fashioned chapel, the stained glass beautifully made above the alter, and the only thing that wasn't necessarily beautiful was the man who sucked the light from the entire room, which was where Erik stood, watching me with those intense, but now lightened eyes. I saw that look before... when he told me that he loved me...

I took a step in after what seemed like forever, and I think that I almost forgot how to walk, scared out of my mind, tears overflowing repeatedly behind the veil, my face most likely twisted from the crying.

One step... two step...

Oh, what was the use... I stopped walking staring down to my feet, feeling dizzy when I noticed that Erik coughed expectantly for me to look up and keep moving. Next to him was an old priest that was so leathered and old that he may just drop dead before reciting the lines at ordinary weddings. I walked faster, feeling stupidly confident that the priest would die, and really, that was a strange urge, but I found myself closer to Erik quicker than expected.

He outstretched his black gloved hand, expecting me to take it. I only stared at it scornfully before he pulled my hand out from the bouquet of flowers, and held my hand firmly so that I wouldn't move, letting the bouquet drop to the ground as he grabbed my other hand and entwined it with his so firmly that it hurt.

I barely remember the lines... I hardly remember Erik replying. But what I did remember, if anything, was when Erik promised, using the same words as the priest and said things of love and death, and sickness and health, and all the things happy couples do for each other, and he said it with such sincerity in his voice as he looked to me with those odd golden eyes, I was almost moved.

My full name was then mentioned, and my entire body stiffened, expecting me to repeat them. Erik's hand squeezed mine even more, and I squeaked something like a "yes".

Then, came the infamous two words. The priest said the usual line, and Erik said the two words with such precise beauty and care so that it would sound as cared for as it was supposed to.

And the priest came to me, and it was silence from my point. I was on the choice from saying I do or don't and my hand seemed to be breaking at that moment with Erik's strong hold on it. I gulped and cried even louder, and squeaked something that sounded like an "I do", but I guess that was good enough for "You may now kiss the bride," sounded.

Oh, Hell no... He raised the mask up to reveal his thin and twisted lips, taking his gloved hand and removing the veil from over my face, which was possibly a bright red from sobbing this entire time. It came to me like another slap in the face that I was _married..._ Married!

"Oh, I must kiss you!" He said quietly, almost pleadingly, coming closer, to me so that his peculiar body was almost pressed against mine. I tried to back away, but he grabbed my back with a hand, and came even closer.

I felt those dead lips press onto my own, and I could no longer breathe or stand. I collapsed in his arms, and fainted.


	14. Surprised

**Last chapter was a surprise, was it not? Erik has his reasons, anyway... I think it'd be awesome to write Erik's point of view for this story because there's still so much unsaid about their relationship, I just dunno if I could actually write for Erik, I'd probably /have/ to have Erik's insane voice whispering in my ear the entire time and my family might think me kind of strange for those months when I attempt to do so. Anyway, give your opinions on that and the following chapter.**

READ AND REVIEW!  
~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 14:_

_Surprised_

I awoke laying on my bed, though something in the back of my mind knew that Erik was sitting _right_ there waiting for me to wake up, so I went on pretending to be sleeping, petrified to face him again. It went on like that for only possibly a few seconds until I heard a sigh and then, "open your eyes, Christine."

I did so, in fear he may touch me to try to get me up, and I definitely didn't want that. Not again... I shuddered at the memory of his lips touching mine-_those dead lips_- and I felt sick to my stomach. I was utterly grateful to be in the constraining wedding dress, though it was extremely uncomfortable to be laying down in. My muscles ached and felt like gelatin from trying to hold myself up the entire "ceremony," and I was slightly dizzied, but not so much that I couldn't see Erik sitting across the room with a different mask now... instead of a full black mask, it was now white and it didn't cover the entirety of his face, instead, his mouth and chin was exposed which was not so horrible as the rest of his face, I'd consider it fine enough... But I just wondered of the sudden change... and glared when I thought of the possibilities.

"We are married now... Erik has a bride..." It sounded partial to disbelief and something like ecstasy.

I didn't say anything, not exactly knowing what to say to someone who just forcefully married you, except to stare coldly. It wouldn't begin with words of affection and loyalty, because if I ever uttered them in any sort of way I might just jump out of the window right now, dress and all, and run.

"I _can't believe you_!" I seethed coldly, getting up from the bed, reaching for my pillow and threw it at him and he dodged it easily. "You jerk! How could you _do this to me!?_"

He didn't have an answer to that, of course, I mean how could he? I let out a disgruntled groan, and went on with throwing more pillows at him, except he got there quicker than I, holding my arm down just as I grabbed the pillow, suddenly right in front of me.

"_Let go of me_!" I hissed, trying to get out of his bony touch. "_Don't touch me_! Don't even _think _about it! I hate you! I hate you _so_ much! You exist only to make my life_ hell_ and don't even _think _of replying to that because I. Don't. Want. to. Listen!" I screamed at him, trying hard to twist out of his stronghold on my arm, but he never seemed to let go.

"I will _never _let go of you_._" he said simply, yet heartfelt, and dropped my arm angrily.

That was disheartening. I sank down to the bed and pulled my head into my arms and went on to sob, feeling extremely emptied.

"No... No, please don't cry... I'll be _so_ good to you, don't cry..." He pleaded quietly, grabbing my arms away from my face. "I told you before I can make you very happy, happier than you've ever been before, and I'll have the world on their feet with the glory of your voice. Oh, we could indeed be very happy together... if you just open your eyes, my love, Christine... I'll love you forever and a day... if you could just see..."

"Stop! Don't promise me this! Don't promise me things that is impossible to happen!" I rebelled, looking to his eyes that obviously didn't want to hear that.

"You haven't even began to see! So _much _more than what that _boy_ could give you." He replied, losing patience clearly. "If you could... just give at least a few words of care and affection... for once... if you were... to only be friendly, you would just make me the happiest man alive, and I would make you just as happy as I! If only for a while... Could... You? Just find it somewhere... I love you so, Christine... Could you?" By the end of his plea, his voice was even more pitiful. I shook my head and took in a deep sigh, looking to his eyes, something I should never have done.

"Maybe," was my reply, trying to bury my head in my arms again, but he held my arms firmly but with a gentle touch this time.

"Don't hide your face from me... I want to see it, let me see." He whispered delicately, and I looked to his careful eyes, touching me like I might break like a shard of glass. "Thank you," he articulated, raising a hand and was reaching out to touch my cheek, but quickly backed away, seeing I was looking at his hand as if it could bite me, and then put his hand down slightly, but went back, and lightly touched my cheek with the back of my hand and chills went down my spine, as my entire body became a live wire at his touch, strange yet almost comforting, and I straightened my back as he placed his hand under my chin, looking at his strange golden eyes.

I couldn't take it anymore, though, I leaned away, remembering my hate for him now. It was no longer something small and intimate if I ever felt anything from him. If he didn't force me into this marriage thing, then maybe I would have told him the true reason for the note and maybe he wouldn't be this cold.

"You can't win my love by making me marry you," I hissed, backing away on the bed. He cringed, and rose elegantly from the end of the bed and began to walk out, slamming the door behind him.

I watched as he left, feeling my stomach drop, as I looked at myself in the mirror. The bun in my hair had already been taken out, I noticed, the pins were piled unorganized on my vanity table, and the elegant pearl comb was nowhere to be found. Three guesses where it may have gone, and the first one doesn't count. I huffed something crossed between an aghast sigh and groan, which equaled a gargle.

I looked at the ring placed on my finger, wondering just how lovingly he placed it on my finger. The man was desperate, I knew that much... I wondered how he would be like if his face wasn't deformed, and he wasn't so ugly. I'd bet he'd be one of those geniuses that create something epically dramatic to change the way society works either in music or maybe technology, or business... I actually couldn't see Erik in a suit like that. He's usually more elegantly fashioned, I just don't see how his mind could be restrained to something restricted as that. I bet he'd be the next greatest composer. Yes... I could see his name on top of music scores like any other composer, except much better. And he still has the audacity to love someone like me...

It's the only way he was raised, I suppose, to be extreme. Really this was something perfectly reasonable in his mind... Oh, but what am I to do now? I was trying to make sense of a madman, but it was perfectly reasonable in my mind for his conditions...

How the heck am I supposed to help him...? I'm not strong, I can't say I love him, I can't stand him crying... Why me?

Shoving it to the furthest pits of my mind, I began to undress myself from the uncomfortable dress and put sweatpants and a t-shirt on, suddenly aware of what couples _do_ on a wedding night. I felt sick again, but throwing up into the toilet wasn't the brightest idea when I didn't even have something in my stomach. I then realized I was_ starving_ except there's no way in hell I'm going downstairs. I'm sure he wasn't going to deliver a meal, either, probably wanting me to come downstairs.

"Are you hungry, Christine?" I swear the man reads my mind. That's creepy but interesting in the same way. I didn't answer, feeling as if I was choking on the overwhelming emotion and thought that was going through my mind.

"You'll have to eat downstairs, my dear..."

I pressed my lips together tightly.

"Are you even in there, darling?" He asked impatiently, knocking on the door hurriedly. I didn't answer that time, either, for no reason exactly, so he opened the door anyway, and looked worried, his bony shoulders tense, and I think that was the first time I actually saw him like that, it looked sort of funny... Despite, I crossed my arms across my chest, and glared at him, as I got off the bed, leaning against it. "I'm not bringing it up, if that's what you're thinking. You must come downstairs sometime or starve." He said, sounding like a parent, which only caused me to blush a light shade of red.

Evidently, he took the blush the wrong way. "What is it? Won't you speak?" He excitedly questioned.

"I'll be downstairs in a second, okay? Just go." I hissed, ignoring my thoughts. He left the room swiftly.

I looked at the clock... four hours until I'll be heading to bed... I shuddered again, looking to see if I was somewhat decent in the mirror. He was _not _going to be sleeping in the same room as me. That just _wasn't_ happening...

I walked down the stairs with shaky knees and an aching stomach, I had to clutch my sides again, and walked in that same condition into the dining room.

The dinner was more vast and spread out elegantly the gourmet food looking large in their own proportions, and there were two candles lit on both sides of the table. I had to blush... knowing Erik really tried to make this something nice, knowing this was more than enough for just me to eat. He may be eating? I sat down in my usual seat across from Erik who was watching intently. I silently put grace on the food along with praying that this night will not end up like I'm beginning to think it will. He seemed to notice it, for he nodded to himself when I opened my eyes and looked up, blushing again.

"Do you like it?" He asked quietly, trying to please.

I only nodded, choking back my actual words, and smiled reassuringly, when I lifted the fork from the table.

"I hope it's to your own tastes." He noted quietly, mimicking my actions and picking up his fork, stabbing a piece of meat and carefully, as if being measures, put the piece of substantial food into his mouth.

"It's nice..." I replied assuringly, not wanting this conversation to go on. I went on eating, not looking up, keeping my head bent low. The silence was maddening, something I now knew I hated just by being in this mansion.

Blinking a few times, I breathed in quietly, "Erik... about... tonight..." I began slowly, looking to his masked face which looked boyishly hopeful, but then became cold.

"I have composed something for you... A wedding mass, of which I will play for you, and I think you will like it very much." He rushed quickly before I could say something. I nodded to myself, rolling my eyes where he couldn't see as I looked down to the rest of the food, once more feeling sick at the reminder. I wiped my mouth with the napkin and placed it by my plate, and scrunched my shoulders to relieve the tensity.

"Come," He pressed, reaching out for me to take his arm, and I stared at it spitefully. He was like a little boy, and could have possibly pouted when I refused to take it.

I followed him to the music room and he signaled to a chair and I sat down, watching him sit himself elegantly at the piano bench, playing a few scales with his long fingers, tapping the keys lovingly, and eventually, the notes wrapped into a lovely melody, calling for me to listen, caressing my ear soft as silk, and filled with lust in each note...

The entire piece was absolutely beautiful and meaningful, something that sent chills up and down my spine, and brought tears rolling down my cheeks unbeknown to me, and I was sitting there, watching him play this piece to me... lulling himself back and forth, shutting his eyes, but then sometimes looked back to me, to see if I was still there, as if to remember something. I sat there awed, I suppose, and dumbfounded, escaping my human body for just a little while, and joy filled me to not be the doomed Christine Daae anymore.

The piece became even more delicate, every chord something luscious and light. Every phrase a sentence of something poetic, but I just couldn't decode everything, because it was at a blur right before the final ending with so many emotions being pounded into my head.

He found me in tears as he turned around, and knelt in front of me and grabbed my hands gently, looking so small in his own.

"Oh, please, I didn't mean to make you cry... You know I hate to see your tears..." He tried to get my attention below my eyes, for my head was hanging low. "Did you absolutely resent it?" He questioned earnestly, sounding utterly disappointed.

I shook my head in the negative, founding no words able to articulate upon my lips, pressing them together. "It was astounding," I replied reassuringly. "Very, very beautiful."

"Then you enjoyed it?" He finalized.

I shook my head in the positive, wanting his hurting voice to stop playing in my head for once, and just listen to more of that otherworldly music once more, letting my mind go elsewhere forever. I wished the fantasies could be real... my life would be _so _much easier.

"You are so beautiful, Christine, so very beautiful-" And my head beeped out the comments that he made, and I found myself feeling like a doll as he took a curl of my hair gingerly between his fingers, as he would touch anything on my head except my face... I chose not to hear his words, I chose not the feel anything, I felt stiff for at least the majority of it until I got tired of feeling like his plaything, and I rose from my seat, clenching my hands into fists.

"I'm tired and going to bed." I hissed suddenly, throwing him aback for just a few seconds, and it took a while after I slammed the door to the music room and heard it reopen to notice he was following, and my cheeks probably obviously became a brilliant red as my heart sped up, making it even more absolutely uncomfortable. I turned at the pivot, finding myself directly under his nose, looking at his chest. "I'll be fine _alone_. Goodnight."

That, evidently, was a slap in the face for him, for he glowered on it for a second, I suppose as I began to stomp away, maybe I'll be there before he and lean against the door the entire night, so he wouldn't come in. How dare he _even think_ about this?

"There's nothing in this world that will stop me from sleeping with my wife on wedding night." He said directly, looking into my eyes with sincerity.

"Erik... No, _please..._" I backed away, running into the chair that was directly next to my waist, almost falling over, and I knew it was to save me from falling, but at the time, I thought it was something worse, but he grabbed my wrist and helped me upright before I fell over on my head, and once more I was under his nose, feeling the shortest as I've always felt, and most intimidated.

"Erik will never hurt you, or take anything... unwelcome liberties... Christine knows that, right? Come, now, you must be tired." He hastened, tightening his grip on my wrist in order for me to drag me off. My breathing became unsteady, and I felt that I was leaning against his grip as my knees wobbled.

"But... but, Erik... Be rational here... For _once_..." I pleaded as he began to pull me away.

"Christine is Erik's wife, is she not?"

"But, _Erik_..."

"Christine!" He hastened unsteadily. "You hardly let me _kiss_ you, you must just do this small little thing... as my wife."

"It's _hardly_ little!" I hissed, trying hard not to shrink away in defeat, and to add onto my determination, I stomped my foot. "_Not now_..." I whispered pleadingly.

He sighed heavily, and slowly, his hands loosened their grip on my wrists until he finally let go. I ran off immediately, slamming the door to my room and flickered on the light half-expecting to see him there laughing maniacally like some insane monster off the movies, but I was much relieved not to, after taking a few childish rounds about the room. I feared that he would dare to come in if I got dressed into nightclothes so I went on sleeping in sweatpants and t-shirt which was comfortable enough.

I lay awake after shutting off the light, staring at the door, wondering if he would come in. I think it was after an hour of simply staring at it, I dozed off finding my life a wreck anyway, why does it matter?

I awoke to the morning light peering in my window, offering a rude awakening. The light was inviting though, so I decided to sit by it, letting the warm sun caress my cold body for once. I was frightfully pale recently, paler than I've always been, and I sat there in hopes of bringing color to my dull self, but my attempts were failed, for Erik was probably expecting my presence downstairs... well... at least I had someone that wanted me to live. I rose from my seat by the window, after looking out to the garden that was blooming lavishly, of course.

I left the room in that daze-like fashion, finding myself once more floating down the stairs, feeling like a ghost.

There was an utmost surprise that awaited me, though, for I found that there was another voice in this house, and currently, Erik's overpowering the heavy accented one. Instantaneously curious, I found myself running toward the living room door, and opening it to find Erik with his hand clenching a middle-eastern-looking man, who seemed indifferent to the touch, and I, for a second, questioned whether he was already unconscious or not, though he was breathing.

Erik saw me standing there, my jaw hanging open looking at the both of them with wide eyes, my heart thudding against my chest.

"Christine!" He exclaimed, dropping the man, and began toward me, and all I seemed to be capable of was scream and begin backing away. Erik, though, caught me before I could fall over my own feet whilst attempting to get away, and the strange man only stared at me with some sort of comical frustration.

Erik took me gently, but firmly by the shoulders and led me back in, and in some sort of terrible feeling, I felt that he may, indeed, take those two ugly hands around _me_. But the way he touched gave the swift reassurance that he meant no harm to _me, _at least... only to other people. That is in no way better. He calmed me down with soft whispers, using that low voice to convince me, but it didn't. I couldn't seem to grasp this interesting fact that there's someone else in this home besides Erik, the maid and butler, and myself. A guest, if you will... As if Erik had any guests.

He took my left hand and exposed the ring that was on my finger to the man, "See, Nadir?" He asked slyly, though desperately. He then went off in some odd language that I didn't understand and I looked at him with an arched brow, trying for him to let go of my hand, and demand to know what he was saying.

"I'm not convinced, Erik," The man that was named Nadir said in English, looking to me curiously.

"Did you choose to be here?" He asked kindly, tilting his head to the side, though still seeming stiff, as if Erik never even attempted to choke him like I just saw.

"No," I replied glaring at Erik who obviously lied in the other language for he sheepishly showed it in his expression down to me. Perhaps this stranger was my chance at escaping. "He's my _foster parent_," I explained, looking away from Erik.

"Erik," Nadir demanded in his thick accent.

"Christine, do you mind leaving us for a few minutes as I take care of this?" Erik asked sweetly into my ear.

I glared at him, annoyed that he was hiding something from me, "Don't kill him..." I begged, thinking I wasn't wanting to have my name in newspapers as someone that was unable to avoid a freak death.

"Just go, Christine." He demanded coldly, and it hit me with such fierceness that I went out of the room gladly before he used that tone once more. I waited outside of the room, though, pressing my ear on the door.

"She doesn't_ want_ to leave because she doesn't want to go to a foster home. She likes it here, and she _chooses_ to stay." I grunted with dissatisfaction that he was lying again, how could I choose to stay when he doesn't even give me a phone to call someone on and ask to take me to the damn foster home? I would much rather go there than be _married_ to him. Erik than said something once more in another language, and Nadir replied with the same angry-sounding accent, but it wasn't just because Arabic always sounds demanding.

"This is obviously against her wishes," He hastened, leaving the language again. Once more, Erik was hiding something, and I was strictly determined to find out.

"Oh, please, Nadir..." Erik then went on, exasperated, in the other language. Seeing there wasn't much more I could do for this situation, I backed away from the door knowing he knew I was listening intently outside of it. I walked away and into the dining room where there was already food waiting to be eaten.

I sat alone, of course, and ate the meal slowly, thinking over the many things Erik could possibly hiding from his "wife"... but maybe it's just better left to be unsaid or not understandable, and sighed, still wanting to know.

Oh, how I hated being here...

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**A/N: I'll have you know that this is the first time I included Nadir in this story:P He may not be the greatest characterization, but I'm working on it. Tell me what you think! Click that rather large button that has that word "review" in it!**


	15. Bitter Revival

**I hope that this isn't too quick for you to take the last chapter in and all that jazz... Um, well, i don't have much to say just that I don't have anything to do until I leave for camping again. *sigh*... well, enjoy this next chapter and please do review like you always have. Love you all!  
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**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Chapter 15:_

_Bitter Revival_

I'm definitely not sure how I felt when Erik came into the room, looking exasperated and emptied. I would furrow my brow and ask what's wrong, but I honestly didn't care at that point. So, perhaps a more interesting question would be,

"Who was that man?" I asked in a small voice.

"A... _friend, _for lack of a better term, of mine that seems to follow me everywhere." He explained quickly, pushing it aside. I put down the fork, and looked to him standing regally now at the other end of the table.

"You try to kill _friends_?" I pressed.

"I said the word with lack of a better term, he's more like my own personal stalker who just happened not to see me in a while." He said those words dryly, but with some sense of humor.

"If you say so." I shrugged, and stabbed my fork into another piece of bacon and ate it thoughtfully. "You were going to kill him..." my voice cracked on those words, my hand beginning to shake, as I thought about scooting my chair away and out the door.

"Christine," He started, and I cut him off with a wave of my hand.

"Don't do that and think everything is okay when it's not...You were going to kill him, weren't you?"

He didn't answer to that, instead attempted to calm me, by using that voice and comment on something that really doesn't matter in this conversation, and somewhere in that long speech I think I heard, "I never mean to hurt you, you know that..."

"Do I?" I asked glaring once more. "All you've done is hurt me. You are_ blind_ to it because you don't think you are." I hissed, rising from my chair, not wanting to converse with him any longer.

"Erik doesn't mean it," He hastened quickly.

"Of _course_ you don't_... _If I always wanted to be married at seventeen, I'll let you know sometime! But currently I do not... and there was no damn choice in the matter!"

"Why does it even matter!? You shrivel away like a child at Erik's touch anyway, so it's not much different!" He spat coldly. I automatically stomped out of the room angrily and headed to the library without finishing breakfast, but it took me a while to notice he was actually following me again. I didn't bother to turn around, glaring to myself.

"What?" I asked coldly.

"I meant to ask you something," He muttered, and I walked forth and turned around so I would be facing his chest again.

"How would you like to go out tonight?" He asked quietly, though very solemn.

"Where?" I asked, the thought becoming very excitable.

"Do you know the date today?" He muttered.

That calmed my excitement... What could possibly be the deal with the date? I shook my head in the negative.

"September 27th." He noted blankly, seeing my reaction and I nodded to myself.

"Oh," I whispered blankly. It is the day of my father's death three years ago, and I blinked at him, "You'll take me to the graveyard?" I asked, trying to be strong for three seconds while I blinked away tears to Erik.

"If you wish." He managed. And I turned away to go to my room and get dressed, along with get a decent pair of shoes.

I met him back in the foyer and he opened the door for me and led me out front to where the usual black car was waiting. He opened the door to the passenger seat in the front and I went in, as he quickly came around and went into the driver's seat for the third time yet. I didn't manage to ask any questions on why he doesn't drive for himself, but oh well.

It was a long, thoughtful drive to the graveyard where I used to spend so much of my time if something went wrong. It was like my sanctuary, I suppose, to feel where my father would be watching over me along with God, and I would kneel in front of his grave, praying for a better day. It was the most peaceful I would ever be no matter what home I go to on a whim. I missed my father more than anything, I missed his smile, his music, and the feeling I still had a family.

We stopped at the grave spot near a family's mausoleum, and he helped me out of the car to the outside, where my father's tombstone was.

The familiar lettering of Charles Daae across the top, and then "beloved father and musician" below it in elegant writing. I knelt in the grass, just figuring out that it was rather cold out, unless I was simply getting the chills. I didn't care that Erik was standing right behind me, as I began to have watery eyes.

"I miss you, dad..." I whispered to the air, wondering if he could just be _right_ there. "I found a place where I'm staying, you know... I haven't left, so I think you'll be happy. I'm learning to sing, too... Dad, he's a wonderful teacher, but... help me, okay?" I whispered so quietly I wondered if Erik would be listening. I used the peripheral vision to spot if he was behind me, but he was near the car, fortunately enough. "I'm married, though... I didn't want to be married, and I'm still trying to find a way out, but it would have been nice to have you at my side, though I don't doubt you were. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I wish you would tell me what to do like you used to, so I don't have to chop my way through life... He's a genius, though, father, and he's brilliant, but I'm not sure if I was ready to be called his wife... I don't know if you'd like him or not. I love you a lot... I love you more than music itself." I murmured that entire speech brokenly to the grave, and let it go for a second.

Flowers came out of the corner of my eye and I turned around to see Erik offering a small bouquet of daisies to me to place on the grave. I gave a small smile to him, and grabbed them placing them in the small goblet for the flowers that was already filled with water from the previous rain storm.

I rested my face into my hands, overwhelmed by the ocean swallowing me whole, as it got harder and harder to tread, thinking of my past months. I broke there, in front of Erik, not intended for I was _really_ trying to be strong. How long have I actually been in this storm, though? Have I not tried for these three years, or am I proving my father wrong that I would be the strong girl that he always thought I was?

"No, I'm not strong, father, I broke our promise..."

_He held onto my hand, laying on the hospital bed, as if using it as a life jacket, so hard... I couldn't bare it any longer, but I must keep holding on. His hand became colder and colder, slowly losing its strength, his breathing becoming more shallow._"No..." I whispered, coming back to real life, already feeling my cheeks a flaming red from the sobbing at the memory, and I found a gloved hand on my shoulder in a comforting way, to drag me out to real life, and trying to reach to me before I drowned. I needed someone to touch me right now... to tell me everything is fine... I needed someone's arms around me this time at the graveyard, instead of thinking that my father would be _right_ there giving a goofy smile.

"Don't cry for me, Christine," He whispered, taking my hand to his chest. "Be strong. Do you... promise, Christine..? Be strong for me... be good.... Don't let me down..."

"I promise," I hurried,quietly.

"I'll always be there..." He whispered with a dry and raspy voice that I could hardly understand anymore,, and choked in a breath... and that was the last breath he took, his hand falling out of my grasp.

"No..." I whispered delicately. "No!" I cried, resting my head on his chest, as if knowing his hand would come back up and go through my hair carefully, and I would hear his heart beating in my ear. "No, no.... don't leave me!" I cried, already breaking his promise.

I turned swiftly to face Erik, not bothering to look at him before I found myself in his arms before he was in mine and my arms went down to my sides weakly, nestling my head into his chest, and straining his shirt with my tears. He patted my head as I cried into his chest, trying to warm me as much as he could, I'm sure. I felt grateful that he would do this for me, when none of my other guardians would take me and I would have to make Meg drive me here once. And none of them would care, either...

"Thanks for taking me here," I whispered through my tears.

"Anytime, Christine..." He replied in my hair, and for at least a few minutes I stood like that, my tears drying on my cheeks soon enough.

"I broke his promise," I whispered guiltily. "I said I'd be strong when I'm so weak... He said not to cry for him... but I _miss _my father..."

"You are strong, Christine..." He replied assuringly, still nestling his own head in my hair.

"No I'm not," I groaned... "I can't let go..."

"You can't let family go," Erik pressed, "You'll never be able to, but you're still strong enough to stand all of this..."

"But..."

"Christine, you haven't broken that promise yet, and as much as I know you, you never will..."

"You think so?" I asked, looking at his assuring golden eyes, and then feeling myself blush, remembering the position I was in at the moment, which was pretty awkward.

"I_ know,_" He affirmed, seeming to smile.

"Thank you," I muttered, once more burying my head into his chest, feeling more comforted than I've ever been these last few months. After a few more minutes, I tore myself away and he grabbed my elbows, studying me one more time, and I looked away, and finally, he let go. I went back into the car and he did as such, and we drove away in utter silence, hardly speaking to each other until we were back at the house.

I didn't know what came over me that I would touch him like that for he must have thoroughly enjoyed it for he seemed strangely lighter about the house, floating more than usual, and I almost had the heart to drag him back down to earth.

The only thing that I hoped wouldn't happen is that he'd get the wrong idea and then think he could sleep in my room tonight, for he's _not_... I get the nerve come into my stomach just thinking about it.

Well... just for the record, my birthday was next month_ and _I'd be turning eighteen, legal or not that this _marriage_ was, Erik would definitely be my actual husband after I'm eighteen. The only question is... would he keep me locked up here like his little songbird for the rest of my life as his "wife"? His slave, or maybe in the wrong sense, him being my slave? Does God honestly have this much of a humor? At least me being eighteen would make things a little less twisted.

Who am I kidding? This is god-awful strange...

I wish I knew more of the law to determine this horrible thing either simply something to scare me so that he knows I won't try to run, or if this is an actual marriage. I don't believe the judge determined the situation of when the orphan gets married. If I could find the truth... maybe I'll be out of this for good. I knew he was hiding something, I could just sense it.

Perhaps... if I ignore him for a while, he may break eventually... Perhaps, if it's long enough, he might expose things that I'm wanting to know. Maybe... he won't want me anymore if I don't do anything. That was definitely worth my while.

I walked cautiously into the library, ignoring the fact that his head was bent on the other side of the room over a book. He tensed at my presence, but I ignored him, searching for a book on the multitude of shelves that he has.

I picked a book that might hold my interest for at least a few hours, and nestled myself into the usual chair, pressing my knees against my chest and tried to get myself involved in the book, but I couldn't help but notice Erik was staring _right_ at me, his burning gaze in my peripheral eye. I felt my cheeks fill with color, but flushed of that color when I noticed he was trying to get my attention, and asked me something I wasn't paying attention to. I kept looking down to my book, ignoring the fact that his gaze was burning a hole into my side. I pressed my lips together to keep from saying something which would ruin my entire theory.

"Christine, won't you say something?" He asked demandingly, and I almost easily blocked it out, shifting my position in the chair, ignoring him entirely. "Christine, I asked you a question..." He pressed, losing the little patience he had. Soon, he was right in front of me, his hands ringed around my wrists, causing me to drop the book and lose the place I had. I had no choice but to look up and glare at him.

"Please don't do this to me, Christine... You can't deny me."

Oh, so now he's so sure of himself. Well, what the hell...? I glared at him, and tried to get my wrists out of his grasp, but to no prevail. I only stared at him, grimacing at his cold hands.

"Why are you ignoring me? What have I done?" He shook me by my shoulders now and I grimaced, getting out of my chair seeing that I will find no peace here, reaching down for the book, but finding it gone from the floor, and instead, in his hands, playing keep away with me.

"Tell Erik what is the matter and he'll give you back your book."

Ha ha... not worth it. I walked away, managing to keep my mouth shut this entire time without snapping back at him! Success, right? So I might manage to pull this off without being forced to speak... or until necessary and I'll do what I must.

To keep from even being tempted to speak, I read one of my old Anne Rice books in my room, starting from the beginning. Though I never was fond of vampires, I did enjoy her quality of vampire, the romantic type and utterly beautiful. A place where even monsters are beautiful... that's the kind of world I'd like to be in right now, and that's almost the perfect selection of book currently.

Just when I thought that Erik wouldn't bother me for the rest of the night, he was knocking on my door. I tried to come up with ways to make him go away without speaking, but the odds were slim. He hardly knocked on the door, anyway, he slid through slyly. And I wondered if he would actually do that if I were to be dressing. I shuddered at the horrible thought.

"Your dinner's waiting downstairs, my sweet." He hedged, and I only stared at him.

"Won't you _do_ something...?" He asked, stepping closer to me, and I moved back on the bed, blinking at him.

"Talk to me... _please_... tell me what's wrong." He sat on the opposite end of the bed, and I stared at him even more so, moving away like he has magnetic force pulling me away. "Oh, Christine, don't do this... this won't help anything." He pleaded, grabbing my shoulder and I moved away, looking at his hand feverishly. I only glared, feeling proud of myself for holding out this long

"If you're going to act like a child, I'll treat you like a child." He decided suddenly, rising from his seat, consciously trying to intimidate me by standing up. He then stalked out of the room, and slammed the door shut, and I heard the lock click one more time... _that_ wasn't what I wanted.

I raced to the door and slammed my fists against it, shouting at him, losing my plan entirely. He almost immediately opened the door, smiling victoriously.

"You can't win over me, Christine. You'll lose." He commented dryly, finding my eyes the level of his chest once more, and I bothered to cram my neck to look up to his mask, standing over me. I only glared, crossing my arms across my chest, huffing to myself, defeated.

"Talk to me, Christine...Tell Erik what is the matter..." He placed his hand on my cheek gently, and rubbed his thumb over it and I ducked down to get out of his grasp, leaning my arm so that he wouldn't try it again.

I went to my bed and hugged the pillow against my chest, still staring at him, and waited for him to walk away when he didn't, of course.

"Will you come down and eat with me, at least?" He pleaded.

I shrugged and watched him leave. When I heard him start to descend down the stairs is when I heard my stomach moan in disagreement, and slowly, I placed my feet back on the floor, steadying myself, and ran the back of my hand over the cheek where he touched me and grimaced. _I hate him_... I had to remind myself, shuddering. I'll eat quickly and then go back into my room when I'm finished, right?

I went into the dining room with my back tensed and looked at Erik, then to the food. He didn't say anything, watching me, watching him... it was like he was studying my every move, though. I took a bite of the meat, chewed slowly and uncomfortably, knowing his eyes were planted on me. I looked up to glare, and then took another bite, breaking the promise to myself that I would eat quickly, so I resumed, cutting more pieces of it, and took a bite ungracefully.

He seemed to try to put words together, stuttering, "Do you want to go back out sometime?" He asked.

I shrugged.

"Tomorrow, perhaps, in celebration of our marriage?"

I shrugged again.

"Do you not care at all?"

I shrugged and that was when he lost it. It really didn't take him long to lose it, I suppose. I guess I forgot already I was dealing with the most impatient man I've ever met. He slammed his fist on the table, causing it to shake, startling me back further into the chair.

"Dammit, Christine..." He sounded like my father for those two seconds, which reminded my heart to drop to this pit of my stomach, and look up at him. I could smile right now for he was losing slowly under my silence. I blinked a few times before he spoke again. "Why must you do this to me? What have I done to deserve your cruelty!?" He was huffing like an animal suddenly, taking me aback. Of course, now he wasn't like my dad... How could I ever forget Erik's wrath? I held onto the armrests of the chair tensely, with my eyes wide watching him intently. For a second, he only stared, and when that patience was over, he groaned again, and sat down.

With a shaky hand, I took a sip of the tea, which tasted awfully strange and bitter so I set it down on the table immediately, biting into another piece of meat to hide the taste. I suppose the taste was so awful, that my head began to spin.

Without another notion toward the rest of the meal set out for me, I rose from my chair, and began to walk out of the room, holding my stomach. It was then that the entire room began to go in circles in my head, my knees going out from under me, when my vision was swept away with a grayish fog, I collapsed into something... I was supposing that it was arms, and I lost consciousness without any sort of feeling left in me.


	16. Hurtfully Succumbed

**Yay! Quick update. Tell me what you think. Also, for blue-chimera, sure, there will be fluff, not to worry, it may or may not be soon, I won't tell you, but I'll keep it in mind. **

**Read and review, like usual**

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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Chapter 16:  
Hurtfully Succumbed

I awoke in my familiar dark room, laying in my bed... to the side. I had an urge to use the bathroom, so I rose up naturally, and felt something weighing down the other side of the bed. I turned my head slowly, to see Erik's dark figure soundly asleep on the other side of the bed... or, I hope that he was asleep. All I knew was his eyes were shut and he was breathing evenly from what I could tell with the light of the moon. My hand rose up, and my jaw went down about to scream but that wouldn't be the greatest idea, as I backed away, clasping my hand to my mouth, so if I had the thought, it would be muffled.

I backed up into the bathroom, and blinked a few times to wonder if he was _actually_ doing this... and he was still there, of course, except now he was rising up. I slammed the door shut, and turned my back against it, and began to sob into my hand, scared out of my whits of what he was possibly thinking. If he... pulled something on me, I would ache, wouldn't I? I made a self-check and I didn't hurt anywhere. Besides, Erik may be a complete son of a bitch sometimes, but... I'm sure he wouldn't do that to me... Oh, _I hate him_, though... I hate him so much I could just_ kill _him before he died.

The cold tiled floor wasn't inviting to be laying on for the rest of the night and I was ridiculously tired. There was no way in hell I was going back to that bed. I hardly recalled even eating, though I was well fed and my stomach wasn't growling.

I wiped my tears away, though I couldn't stop them from falling. The room was silent, and I shut the light off, gathering the many towels in the bathroom to make the floor more comfortable than it is, and clenched my legs to my body, my back still against the door so that it wouldn't open with a little struggle. Curious if he was still there, I had to simply look out the door. It creaked a little, so that he would know, and I knew I didn't care if he did. I looked out to see him still there, and I shut the door immediately, resting my head back on the door, with a towel used as a pillow, and I shut my eyes, but I never seemed to be able to drift off.

Through the door, I heard soft sobs on the other side which was when I decided sleeping against the door may not be so bright. I nestled the towel on the ground and buried my head into it, smelling the fresh cotton scent, and thought about happier things like being on vacation in Maine, being with Raoul, being kissed for the first time... I thought about soft piano music, and blocked it out with my mind, fantasizing that someone would be playing it for me, and slowly, but surely, I fell asleep on the bathroom floor.

I awoke at what felt like an hour or so later, to see morning light through the crevice of the door. My entire body ached from sleeping on the hard floor, but it was worth a little more longer of being unconscious just to forget my situation for a little while when I'm faced with it every single day.

I opened the door to the bright room, and I squinted my eyes to find him gone, thank God. The time was noon, so I guess he would have got tired of waiting anyway. There was a note, however, laying on the foot of my bed scrawled in red ink. For a moment, I thought about not reading it at all, but what was the use of ignoring it? It could possibly be something I wanted for once.

_My darling Christine,  
I will be out for a few hours, I hope you don't mind but I might be back before you're awake. Forgive me for last night... If anything, I hope you forgive me. I don't want to hurt you anymore, I do promise __completely. I'll never do it again, I swear. I didn't harm you, I didn't touch you, just know that much._

I love you very much still, and I know you hate me, but that doesn't effect my feeling.

Anne will prepare whatever you wish to eat whilst I'm away.

_Yours,_

_Erik_

I dropped the note to the bed, not wanting to crumple it for some reason, but not wanting to hold it much longer either for it seemed to burn my hand. In fact, I tucked it into the drawer that held most of my things I wished for him not to see, into the bottom, not knowing what else to do with it.

I took a quick shower and changed into new clothes, since I slept in the clothes from yesterday as well. Walking downstairs, Erik was just walking into the house, looking surprised I stood there, his eyes open.

"Good afternoon," He greeted openly. I continued to walk down the stairs, glaring at him more coldly than ever. I grimaced to him, feeling like yelling to him, but I couldn't let myself give in so easily because he was being horrible _again_.

"Did you just wake up?" He asked, still trying to be sweet.

I nodded in the positive, and continued to descend the stairs, turning so I wouldn't be chewing on my lip to hold back my nasty comments. Just as I went into the living room, I felt Erik's hand touching my shoulder, shaking. "I'm so sorry... Erik was bad... No, Erik was _horrible! _You hate me now, I know it..."

I shook my head in the negative and tried to get out of his grasp, walking away without looking back. The dining room was empty, obviously, and so I was half-expecting to see Anne in the kitchen, which I did. She was putting away her cell phone, saying goodbye to whoever she was talking to when I walked in.

"Good afternoon," She greeted kindly. I sighed, as if I was holding my breath for all this time.

"Hey... Could I help you make my meal?" I asked, tilting my head to the side, leaning against a counter.  
"Erik wouldn't like that." She huffed, rolling her eyes.

"Then I'll make the entire thing. I don't really care what he doesn't like and likes, as I've told you before." I huffed angrily, searching around for a pan to cook noodles or something simple like that in.

I turned around and she was there, holding a pot and a box of spaghetti noodles, and at times like these I just _know_ that she reads my mind.

I grabbed them and smiled sheepishly, heading to the sink to pour some water into the pot.

"Erik slept with me last night after knocking me out." I muttered, snidely, practically hissing the words as I heated up the stove and put the pot onto it, leaning against the counter once more casually.

She widened her eyes, and huffed a breath, shaking her head. "That's pushing it... Did he...You know...?"

"He said he didn't." I rolled my eyes, "I don't think so... I trust him slightly enough that he wouldn't do that if he actually wants me to like him back." I replied unevenly, stirring in the noodles, feeling relieved intensely that I was sharing this with someone, instead of burning inside of me, weighing my shoulders down further into the deep water. Talking with Anne was like her helping with having the world off my shoulders.

"I'm very sorry. How did you know?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night." I replied dryly, reminding myself just how sore my body was in the back.

"And..."

"I slept in the bathroom. Not the brightest idea, but I was gone." I explained exasperatedly.

"Ooh." She shook her head. "I'm sorry, once more... I hate to say that. I wish I could help, but... you see this is my job and it's all it takes to help my family."

"I know." I replied. "Thanks for listening all this time, though. I don't know where I'd be if I didn't have you to talk to..."

"I'll always be there. Well, unless I screw up sometime, then I may not be there, but for right now, anytime." She said, giving a reassuring smile.

"Does he listen to you as well?" I questioned, stirring the noodles.

"Rarely." She rolled her eyes leaning on the island in the center of the room with the spatulas and other utensils as such hanging over her.

She brought me the strainer once the noodles were finished, and I brought the pot over to the sink, and poured the pasta's extra water into it methodically, and poured a serving into he bowl she offered, along with the butter and Parmesan, just how I enjoy it.

"I'm going to eat in here, if that's okay. I don't feel like facing Erik right now."

"It's fine." She dragged over a stool for me to sit down on and sat on the stool across from me on the island.

"This is nice... I wish I could do this everyday." I sighed, filled with dread at the thought of having to eat another meal with those burning eyes into my head just as I eat.

"I don't think he'd like that," she sighed.

"Once more... I don't give a crap. I'll eat as much as I want without him staring at me... he may control every bit of my life right now, but he must give me some rights in the house he locks me up in."

"I don't deny that." She added thoughtfully, looking through the newspaper on the table. I gazed at the headlines... mostly politics. Well, at least the world wasn't coming to an end without me knowing. No World War III, or the next ice age, I guess it doesn't matter at the moment if it even was happening. Erik wouldn't let me see it. I sighed on that thought, winding the pasta on my fork.

We ate in silence, but it was comfortable for I had nothing to say except for complaints on her master, but I didn't bother to worry her more than I already have. I kept my head low, eying the next page of the newspaper, headlines around the community, schools starting, sports beginning to play.

I finished too quickly, facing the exiting door before I left. "Thanks," I said quietly, putting my dish by the sink.

"Once more, anytime." She smiled, and continued reading the paper casually.

I walked out to the living room to face Erik who was sitting there. I ignored him sitting there, and walked on to the library. I sighed, and shut the door. It wasn't long until he followed like a dog on his feet.

"Christine?" He asked as if I'd answer. I didn't look up from selecting the book from the shelves once more. "I don't want to hurt you again..." He hedged, and I still ignored him, grimacing whilst my back was turned from him. I picked a book, considering it unlikely that I'd be left alone long enough to actually pay attention to it. "Will you sing again?" He pleaded quietly. I gripped the edges of the book tighter and sat down onto one of the chairs. "It won't be good for your voice to recover if you have not been singing for a while." He noted knowledgeably. "Oh, please... if you speak again, Erik _promises _to be good. He _promises_... I'll give anything to hear your voice again. Please, _please..._" He pleaded, coming to my feet once more, suddenly at my lower jeans level.

I looked at him for a good long time, with his head bowed, as if praying to me, his waxy forehead shown to me. I grimaced, and looked the other direction.

"Anything?" I asked quietly, hardly a whisper.

"There's restrictions." He quickly noted, looking directly up to me with his bright eyes glowing gleefully at the very sound of my voice. God... What have I done to this man?

I sighed, and looked back to the book, but then to him. "You're hiding something. I want to know what it is." I whispered lightly yet directly.

"Why should I be hiding something? I'm not hiding anything." He defended almost instantly, trying to make his voice utterly convincing, but all I could do was grimace.

"What did that man want?" I asked swiftly.

"You're not leaving me." He said, as if that was the answer already. My eyes watered at the chance of escape gone through the window, already implying that he was insisting on ridding of me. Well, that's enough of that.

"Why did you lie to him?"

"I answered that," he dully replied. I let out an exasperated groan, for he was still impossible to deal with.

"Oh, don't be so angry, please don't be... I only want to try to please you as much as I can." He pleaded again, being at my feet again, bending his head down low like a chastised child.

"You don't tell me accurate answers." I muttered snidely.

"You'd be very angry."

"I'm _already_ angry." I spat back.

"I'm not telling you." He pressed roughly.

"I don't_ trust_ you, then." I pressed angrily, losing my own patience just as he gradually lost his. "Love is built on trust. I don't trust you at all." I hedged dryly, crossing my arms firmly, trying to mask my strength with the feeling that he knew I was strong, which was reassuring in my own right.

He groaned, sounding bemused already, and bent to face me directly, studying my face from my eyes to my hair, though frightened to look anywhere else.

"Tell me if this '_marriage' _is even legal." I tried him tensely.

"It is," He said boastfully, as if rubbing it in. I sighed once more, and backed off swiftly. "Judicial consent and everything, Christine, my sweet."

My heart dropped along with everything. I found myself useless, for he said it with such certainty that I could shatter into shards of glass at his feet right there. I went through this whole ordeal hardly believing this was happening to me, and then reality and fate came back once more to give me one more icy slap on the face.

"If you learn to trust me, then I would make you happy..."

"You've said that before, Erik!" I argued, annoyed.

"Oh, just love me and I'll be good! I'll be very good! We'll go to the opera again if it pleases you, if it would have you sing for me. I _cannot_ let you go, oh, Christine, I _love_ you! Can't you see? Can't you see at all!? Will you try to get over this hate? Will you?"

"I don't want to hate you, Erik..." I think I said those words, for they were the thoughts in the back of my head, they wanted to show themselves up front. "You _must_ understand..." I began imploringly, "This whole _marriage_ wasn't the best thing. And, Erik?"

"Oh, yes, Christine?"

"I don't know if I could get over that."

"It will be like it never happened, then. Could you forgive me for pressing it against you so quickly? Please?" Well, that was something like I thought I wanted to hear. I thought through those exact words, pressing it deep into my head.

"I don't know."

"Be sure, Christine... be sure."

I could lie, you know... I _was_ an actress. Maybe ignoring him wasn't the brightest idea yet again. He drugged me to get me to sleep next to him the very day that I decided to ignore him.

"Yes, I'll try to forgive you." I said thoroughly, trying to sound like I meant every word, when I meant not one part of it. It was difficult, but it was evidently what Erik wanted to believe, therefore he listened, and therefore it didn't matter if I was lying because he couldn't tell right up front.

Hm.

"Oh, thank you," He replied, grabbing my hand once more and pressed his lips against it, sending goose flesh down the arm he held in his icy grasp. He used that hand to slightly help him rise up, and faced me fully, intimidating me once more, but I don't think that he intended it this time. He looked intimidated for a long while before I heard him breathe in to speak. "I just want one more thing... And then in return, I'll give anything to you."

"It depends." I grunted dryly, feeling dried out of any more feeling for today.

"Could I... you know... hug you? It's not so much to ask, right? Could I?" He was like an eager child once more, asking for something on Christmas day.

I don't think I could have refused him no matter what mood I was in, for all he wanted was a hug. It was like a puppy pleading to be let out of its cage.

I don't think I had to nod before he pulled me against him, as he's done before to help me, but this time I think I was helping him. I don't really know what got into me when I pulled my arms around his thin frame, pressing him even tighter against me.

"I love you, Christine," He said into my hair. I pressed my lips together, thinking of something to reply instead of an uncomfortable silence.

"I believe you," I replied, dropping my hands to my sides, waiting for him to let go, but... it didn't happen as quickly as I'd like it to. I noticed that he had a very strange scent to begin with. It wasn't what Raoul would have, something between cologne and whatever his clothes smelt like. No, Erik's was something I couldn't put a finger on, it didn't smell anywhere near that. I'm just strange like that when I don't have much more to think of when someone is embracing me in this way and you feel something but you also can't place a finger onto.

I guess... sometimes I wish I loved him the same way that he loves me. Would I even be able to? If someone like he would be capable of such love and adoration, than it's truly a pity, for someone like myself, to not be when he thinks that I'm so wonderful. I suppose if he didn't think me wonderful than he wouldn't love me... for how could he? It would take _a lot_...

Huh?

I'm befuddling myself, and I ended my strange gathering of facts inside of my head when he pulled away.

"How would you like to go somewhere soon? A vacation, if you will?" He asked suddenly.

"A vacation?" I repeated, not being able to see Erik being in that tourist-like setting someplace in the commercialized USA. Ha ha... really, I have a twisted mind. Anyway...

"Italy, France..." He suggested as if it was nothing.

"Are you serious?" I asked disbelievingly. Yeah, of course... what would the USA be worth to Erik, anyway?

"Italy, actually. I have some business I need to take care of, and I won't leave you here for a week alone." It was like another day out for him, and I envied him for a second, looking back to all the chorus field trips to Europe that I never got to take no matter how much I cried at night because I didn't have the money, obviously. "Would you like to go?" He offered.

"Definitely... but when?" I hastily questioned, my brows raising.

"Oh, next week or so."

"That would be great, Erik." I replied enthusiastically, feeling the same excitement that I had one year when my dad told me Raoul, himself, and I would be going to ocean city for the weekend, except a little more excited to the point that I was already counting down the hours.

He was trying to buy my love, I knew it, but it was a start. Maybe it would be good for the both of us to get out of this damned house. I can't promise anything, but once more, I'll try. _Raoul wouldn't take me to _Italy_ anyway,_ the little girl part of my mind said.

"Could you sing as well? You need practice." He pressed suddenly serious. How _does_ he do that?

"Sure." I replied and we were already off, walking to the music room.


	17. Italy

**Quick update again! Woo! OK. I'd like to thank you all for the umpteenth time for the reviews! I have realized, that if you guys keep reviewing the way you are, this will be the most reviews I've ever received for a story! THANKS SO MUCH! I'm so happy you enjoy it, and that you demand these updates, and it just makes my day slightly better.**

Also, a little inside on the country choice for Erik and Christine's "vacation". I happen to have a very deep chance of having the pleasure to go to Italy with the marching band, and so, in my own dream world I try to live vicariously through their outting, but I do so hope that I'm able to go to Italy for it would be such an inspiration for me and my music..

Tell me what you think as you always so dutifully do, and read.

Love to you all!  
~The Phantoms Flutist~

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Chapter 17:

_Italy_

The week was concocted of singing and lessons. It was nice, I suppose, it was to keep my mind off of everything else. Erik didn't come back to my room just as he promised, or if he did, I didn't know it, which is what he might be aiming for. I tried to be nice, though I felt dead when being so. He would, at times, fawn over me for quite a while, and I would sit there stiffly, and wasn't in the right heart to put him down. He was just _so_ pitiful, yet inhuman, and it was rather hard to see him as a person like Raoul is.

I'm worn of fighting, of rebelling, and I only want to live like normal people for once, and thrashing against your guardian who unconditionally loved me and whom I denied. He said for me to forget the marriage, and I couldn't. I stared at the ring for hours at a time. Once, I had the heart to pry it off with ice water this time, and it came off. When I happened to look inside of it, my name was engraved on the inside of the ring which meant, also, that he meant to do this loads of time before he actually announced it.

When he saw it off, he spitefully ordered me to put it back on and I gave the excuse that I wanted to fully appreciate it. He, of course, didn't believe me, and went on huffing angrily, and then pardon himself as usual.

It went on like that, nothing more, nothing less, uneventful for when I counted down the hours until we left to embark on the biggest adventure I've ever hoped to be on.

We left very early in the morning to get there the same day. The only unfortunate part of this entire thing is that I've never, in my life that I remember, have been on a plane.

"Just don't think about it," Erik muttered on the car drive there, and I could hardly listen, my heart already fluttering that I may react horribly to the height at which we'd be traveling.

"How long will it be?" I asked as I stepped out of the car, my bags and things over my shoulder.

"Six or seven hours." He answered briskly as we began to walk, keeping a strict eye on me by his side, overwhelmed by the multitude of people we were rushing into. Nobody was less busy as to stare at the strange pairing, and I couldn't care. My mind was fixed on being somewhere I've never been, out of all the things I wanted to do in life, this was definitely one of them. He deserved my many thanks later, I had to remind myself fondly, and I believe that's what he was looking forward to. I had six or seven hours to give up the courage to say so.

But I was in on an unwelcome surprise when we reached the terminal that we would be going out on. _He had a private plane_. Well, of course he would. With that much money and traveling he would go through, I'm sure he would have a plane. There wouldn't be people on it to occupy their time on staring at the masked man, so that was the utmost thought, I guessed. I could never tell what, exactly, Erik was thinking when he goes through this, so I'm not accurate.

I, myself, didn't know what to think. There wouldn't be people to entertain me. I had books, but that wouldn't be enough...

Getting on the plane seemed to make my stomach do a few flips over and over. It was what I always pictured first-class riding to be; big seats, plasma television and a nicely decorated surrounding, but I pretended not to be so fascinated with it. He helped me onto the plane, grabbing my hand firmly, and telling me reassuring words as to not get sick whilst thousands of feet above ground. There was television, at least, which I hardly paid no mind to, but fascinated all the same, for I haven't seen a television in who knows how long.

Erik took me to my seat, and attempted to help me with the seatbelt, but I shooed him off, annoyed, but looked back to him as he huffed and sat in his own seat and repeated my action.

"How long will it be again?" I asked, resting my head to the back of the seat, and took in a deep breath, to see the sun just peeping above the clouds from where I could see, painting brilliant colors to just touch the sky.

"Six or seven hours, it depends on which airport we'll be landing in." He answered curtly just as the pilot gave the announcement. I sighed and looked out the window, and huffed a deep breath.

"It's best not to think about it." He noted, and I felt his eyes on my back, and I cocked my head to look at him, and he looked suddenly tense, almost nervous just to add something kind. Have I really done that much? "You actually should get used to it as well, if you end up where I'm sure you will."

That was actually... nice. Very nice. He said that so fondly, I smiled, his voice smooth and light, it was like an angel telling me something, and I believed him.

"Traveling the world as I have, you will have audiences on your feet. The angels will weep."

"You really think that?" I interrupted before he went on.

"I'm definitely sure of that. In fact, that is what is to happen... if that's what you want, of course."

"And you're not biased? If you heard me... just randomly, would you still think so?"

"I _did_ hear you randomly." He reprimanded cordially.

"Oh. Right." I replied dimly, remembering that small time on stage when Erik was watching, evidently. "How was I better than the rest...? That was one of my first productions to be in." I recalled.

"You _meant _what you sang. If you put that into your voice, than it is a thousand times over better than another. Music is just notes and dots on a page if you don't breathe into it... and Christine, that is exactly what you did and what I heard." I was left to silence, and I sat there, staring at him, for his voice was so sweet, that I couldn't imagine what he must have gone through to win this time to say these words to me, for all the bittersweetness in the world was in his voice at that time. I truly had nothing to say. "Your voice speaks to me, Christine, it always has." He said quietly seeing I had no reply still. "We two are very much alike, our own match of hurt in the world, and when you sing to me, it's equivalent..." He went off, looking thoughtfully past me. "It's equivalent to my own, personal angel, singing to _me_ from hell..." Another pause, "_To me_..."

I stood there, aghast by his emotion that just came from him suddenly, and all I could do was remain speechless, and nothing was heard except the sound of the engines softly.

"And one day, if you wish, I'll let you share it with the world... if you would just sing it to _me..._"

"Of course..." I replied, knowingly, nodding my head, toying with the ring on my finger. "Yes." I added quietly.

That was good enough for him, for he seemed to smile... just a little, not something cruel, or mocking, it was drastically sweet, and I felt my heart melt into a puddle on the floor, staring at him with such tensity, that it overheated my cheeks which still flamed.

I leaned my head back and looked back out the window, smiling to myself that I was actually comfortable with Erik for once, and that we were at something like a truce if it only lasts these six hours until the plane lands.

I collected my thoughts and feelings... was I falling? I don't think so... I've fallen in love before and it wasn't as strange as this, but it's all I_ would_ get if I were to be falling for Erik right now. All it was is... a mood change, desperation... and he was my angel. Yes... An angel. A guardian angel, if you will. Why else would God have brought him into my life if it wasn't to torture me with his pitifulness? Out of the millions of foster parents in the world, why else would God have dragged him here if he already seen me?

Where would I be if I didn't have Erik, anyway? At a foster home, as I've said, ruined and torn away from the world, if not already but he's already making it up by bringing me to Italy with him.

No... it couldn't be right. This was wrong... I wasn't supposed to... love him. I can't be. I mean if I was, than I wouldn't be that uncomfortable with him after all this time, would I? When I met Raoul, it was like I've met him a thousand times over, as children and growing up together like brother and sister until... until he kissed me. I felt nothing but hate when Erik kissed me. Therefore, it can't be right.

I let out an aggravated gasp, which seemed to also pull him out of his thought as well.

"What is it, love?" He asked.

"It's... nothing, just thinking, you know..." I huffed, and went back to looking out the window, watching the clouds go by, as the sun rose above the earth, to take its position.

The rest of the trip was concocted of me reading, listening to the radio. Bored, out of my mind for at least an hour, I talked with Erik on little, trivial things, debating, until he fell into a story that lasted for about half an hour... He said it with great detail, and such a thrilled tone throughout the entire statement, that it kept me interested the entire time. It was about his time in Italy as a child, studying architecture. I asked quite a few questions, and he gladly answered them. But the ending... the ending, I'd rather _not_ think about.

It came to the moment after the story, that I begged Erik to let me watch the television. It took a lot, unsurprisingly enough, but he let me after the third annoying whine. I watched some movie channel, one dramatic movie after another, using the headset given to each seat. Erik paid no attention, writing something down on some notepad, something I couldn't see. Carelessly, I eventually fell asleep during a melodramatic soap opera-ish show after changing the channel over and over.

I was awakened by the pilot announcing that the plane has finally landed, and Erik shaking my shoulder.

"Time to get up," He whispered into my ear, and helped me out of the seat I was in for the past six or so hours.

I opened my eyes wide, coming to reality for a second and I realized I was _actually _in Italy! Well, out the window, of course wasn't much for it was a small airport, with people all over the place, but it was enough for the second so I wasn't overrun with too many things at the same time.

He helped me with my bags, and carried his own at the same time, still as tense as before which was quite odd for where could I go in a country overseas without a clue at where we are at? Well... where _are _we anyway?

"Where are we in Italy?" I asked, tugging on his coat to get his attention.

"Florence," He answered under his breath, his eyes still searching the crowd nervously. I nodded and walked on, fixing the position of the bags on my shoulder, and walking behind him intently, noticing once more that nobody was stopping to stare at the masked man, all speaking in their native language which was like a different air already.

Erik spoke on his own cell phone in Italian, I supposed, with an angry tone. I looked up curiously as he looked down to me, taking my free hand and we walked out to the outside entrance where a circle of cars were picking up or dropping off, and somewhere in there was a black limousine and where we were heading.

A man waited there, putting his own cell phone into his pocket, and looked to me, then to Erik, and smiled, speaking in his own language with a light tone, and Erik replied fondly, shaking his hand, and the man opened the door to let me in, and I was followed by Erik.

I remained silent as the two men conversed, looking out the window as we took off to see the highly decorated and adorned city that is called Florence. Erik leaned over and began pointing out different chapels, and museums. A large tower stood over an enormous courtyard we drove through, people gathering around in lines, tourists like us, waiting to get inside.

"Giotto's Bell Tower," He answered at my curiosity, and we went on to more little shops, cafes and restaurants, and a few hotels but none of them we stopped at.

I was awestruck by the difference between America not to care that we were sitting for at least another half hour, for it was as busy as an American city on a weekend, stopping, waiting for people to pass by, looking at us strangely, already cast out of the society without having to step foot on it.

We reached a large hotel, with my little knowledge of Italian, only knowing that half-French part of the language in itself. Erik helped me out of the car and grabbed my bags for me to carry, and held the heavier ones.

The driver handed to Erik what looked like to be a hotel key, and we went inside to the magnificent building, what might have been a mansion before made into a tourist trap. People now were staring, not being in such a hurry here and it only caused for my heart to speed and my cheeks to flush. I tried to ignore it as we walked up the marble staircase with lamps on both sides of the railing, all golden.

We walked the corridors for what seemed to be a long time, and they reminded me of Erik's mansion labyrinthine-styled and elegant. We reached an oak door with the number label and Erik put down the bags and unlocked the door, opening it wide for me whilst handing me my bags.

"This is your room," He announced, showing me inside, and placed my bags on the bed, as I looked around curiously. A television was in front of the large, comfy-looking bed with a beautifully designed quilt over it, the walls were a deep red, and the art on them was very different from American paintings.

"And I'll be next door if you need anything. I suggest you rest for a while, for we will be leaving in two hours."

"Where will we be going?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"You'll see," he said lightly, and handed me the key to my room, and walked out through the door adjacent through the one I came in on.

Sighing to myself, I threw my body onto the bed and looked onto the lavish ceiling which would be an interesting sight to gaze at in the night when trying to sleep. I don't think I _will_ be able to sleep, now that I think on it.

I began to unpack my things, placing it in the dresser drawers that were offered so I wouldn't dig through my bag every time I need something, and I hummed to myself. I pulled out the dress that I delicately packed in another bag, for Erik told me to bring at least two formal outfits, I questioned why, and he didn't give me an answer, of course. Trying to surprise me again, which wouldn't last long-the one thing that changed me by being with Erik for this extended amount of time is that I no longed enjoy _pleasant_ surprises lest they be _unpleasant_.

I rested with turning on the television, and switched it to English subtitles so I wouldn't spend hours lingering on the soap opera's cliché plot. I leaned against a fluffy pillow, watching the television like a child who has been denied her favorite toy, and got annoyed by having to read the entire thing after an hour, and went on taking a shower, for I felt hot and bothered.

After those inconsequential events, I was bored. Hotel rooms aren't fun. I knocked on the door Erik disappeared on, and he answered to come in, which I did reluctantly and stood there, leaning against the door frame tiredly.

He turned from the small desk to look at me, after writing something. I tilted my head in chance that I'd be able to see what he was working on.

"What is it?" he asked, sounding bothered as well.

"Can I walk around the hotel? Please?" I asked.

"No." He answered simply, and turned back around. I groaned... of _course_ he'd say no.

"Please?" I asked again.

"No."

"Why not?" I hedged, crossing my arms.

"Because." He waved me off. "Go read... something."

"I already read two books today, Erik..." I moaned, sounding melodramatic.

"Read a third." He was becoming annoyed... maybe...

"Why can't I? It's not like I have some place to go, I'm not even in the same country as where I could run off. Are you seriously _that _paranoid?"

"I said no, now go do something."

"There's nothing to _do_! Oh, _please, please, please... _Come on! You seriously don't think you'll lock me in here this entire week giving me nothing to do while you're out doing whatever! Honestly..."

He grunted, and then turned back to look at me, possibly arching a brow.

"Fine," He said, looking over my composure in his doorway, groping against the door frame. "Come back before six, though, to get dressed. Promise?"

"Yeah, promise!" I said, excitedly, and turned to shut the door, when I felt Erik grip my wrist before it shut on him.

"God, you're quick..." I hesitantly smiled dumbly up to him.

"You _will_ come back, right?" He asked imploringly.

"Erik..." I grunted, thoroughly annoyed myself. "Once more... where the _hell_ do I have to go? You're my only ticket back to home, so really it'd be stupid to leave. You don't think I'm stupid, do you?" I asked slowly, and he let go of my wrist, letting me ease back into regular composure.

"Right," He replied, and backed out of the way. "Enjoy yourself and don't get lost." He said dryly

"I probably will, but don't worry too much... I know enough Italian to find my way back." I hinted and retained myself from bouncing up and down, and swiftly left the room.

The hotel was _huge. _


	18. When In Rome

**Soo... yeah. Well, I hope this is enough fluff for now. Enjoy it while you have it for you never know... Not to queue in anything but... yeah.**

Thanks and read and review and all the wonderful things you people do!  
~The Phantom's Flutist~

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Chapter 18:  
When In Rome...

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_The hotel was _huge_, and I use this word in lack of a better term. Honestly, I didn't think I'd be able to make it back to room 333 (or as I recently thought out half-evil room, insert random snicker here), I might just leave bread crumbs so as to not be late. I had thirty minutes to be back and get dressed and all that jazz.

It was like one of those comedy shows, an American in the midst of all the finely-cut Europeans, and I felt clumsy in sweatpants and a somewhat-decent blouse.

I basically looked around at the architecture, nobody really seeming to care for a curious tourist roaming through the area. The lobby was the most interesting, and then I peeped into the cafe which looked nice as well, but I was most excited to be outside and on the streets for once. I tossed around the idea, knowing Erik would be mad, but once more... do I care? I'd probably get lost anyway. I settled with watching outside instead of being outside, sitting on one of the couches, looking out the large window.

I walked a few of the corridors, desperately wanting to not be on time, for I hated being locked up for any length of time. What does Erik think I am, anyway? His own pet that he could carry around in a cage, fawn over it, and be done with it? I grimaced to myself in anger, and then tossed about the idea of going outside again...

Why not?

I walked back down the staircase, and to the front lobby to where the doors were letting people in and out, and I casually walked out, feeling utterly relieved to breathe fresh air again. I passed the circle of cars, after rows of greenery and shrubs in front of the hotel, and found myself on the cheaply laid sidewalks which may have been here longer than America's sidewalks, I kept that thought in mind with a decent smile.

I probably looked quite foreign in the midst of tan people with my paper white skin and capability of a ghost. No matter... I was already acting like a tourist, amazed by the buildings, of the statues, of the people and their fabulous language.

I didn't walk far, remembering the statues that I passed earlier, for they weren't hard to forget. I turned back eventually and unfortunately.

I suppose it's not so bad if Erik is taking me out, and saying it's something formal. I almost forgot La Scala is around here somewhere in Florence of which he'll probably be taking me to as well, and the sudden thud of my heartbeat, I was very excited. Well... he'll take me to places is if I don't piss him off too much which is probably what I just did, looking at the clock on the wall of the lobby.

I raced back up the stairs and into the corridors, looking for the room, and eventually, I found it by finding my masked partner in it.

He was glaring at me, of course.

"...What?" I asked innocently, beginning to feel for the lock on the door and prepared to shut it on his face again.

"You're late. The hotel isn't _that _grand that it took you an hour to go through." He hissed.

Should I lie to him...? Or tell him the truth? Lying isn't nice, but he lies to me all the time without me knowing he was actually telling a lie, therefore, it's only fair.

"Sorry." I replied, "I was... looking around."

"Sure." He replied sourly. Once my door was unlocked, I slipped inside the room.

"Where are _you_ going?" I questioned snidely.

"I'm checking to my planes are set and intentionally about to get you back here, to which you already are." He snickered. "I'll be back before you're finished."

"Will you let me know the 'plans' exactly?" I tried.

"No." He replied without any decision and turned to leave. "You'll enjoy it, that's all you need to know."

I nodded, and shut the door, turning to the closet where I hung my dresses. I picked a slimming black dress with a v-neck and halter top, but the rest of the dress wasn't so thrilling. It was good enough... he only said formal and all black is as formal as I've ever been.

I used a few clips to put my hair into something like a messy bun, not quite perfected as I'd like for it to be, and decided not to go with heels in fear of being awkward, so I stuck with flats, though I'd hate to feel shorter than I already was next to Erik.

It wasn't long before Erik knocked on my door, expecting me to be finished _that_ quickly. I reminded him that I was, in fact, a girl, and I did take a long time, of which he didn't know. I kept him waiting another ten minutes or so until I was finished with makeup and getting my hair perfect.

I opened the door to find him standing _right_ there in the doorway, looking down at me, and his entire body seemed to freeze up, looking at my face as if frightened to look anywhere else. I blushed at his boyish whim, and backed up a little. He was wearing a tuxedo, which was different this time from his usual attire because he _actually_ wore white under the jacket. He looked... _handsome_, actually. A very gentleman-like fashion that men never seem to have anymore. My heart thumped so loudly, I was cautious that he would hear it. I looked up to his mask, as he tried to straighten himself out, reaching out his arm for my own, and I took it slowly. His touch was not of some insane, kidnapper who only exists to destroy me to pieces, but of a gentle, loving man who longs to care for me...

I felt his eyes look down to me, looking at his arm as if it was the first time I've ever seen it before, and I looked up to him quickly, without saying a word, and smiled... sort of.

We reached the front entrance where the familiar limousine was waiting for us in the courtyard which was lit up with lampposts for the night to guide the cars to the hotel entrance.

Erik helped me in as usual and sat next to me directly, and told the driver something in Italian, who nodded, and we drove off.

"You'll like this very much," He said quietly, stroking the palm of my hand with his thumb, and I could only stare at it, already knowing the sights of the nearby part of the city, thanks to my own outing.

"So heard," I muttered, tearing my gaze away from his hand, and took my hand away from his reach, placing it on my lap.

I felt him look back to me with disbelief, and a small grumble that wasn't understandable. My thoughts waved it off... why the sudden change, anyway? He didn't quite deserve it yet... I mean... you know... did he?

Whatever. My head hurt from thinking this through too much.

The ride wasn't long, so I found myself walking again on the sidewalk, to a classy and elegant-looking building, which I supposed was a restaurant. The smell of food made my stomach grumble obnoxiously, feeling my cheeks begin to flame for no reason.

People were all around, also enjoying a brisk late-summer evening. I shuddered, from both hunger and the chill that swept with the wind to us. Erik put his warm arm around my shoulders which helped a little, and I couldn't refuse.

The interior of the restaurant was like what you would see on some romantic movie, breathtakingly serene and elegant.

The hostess led us up some stairs to one of the top floors and we were now in the night air on the rooftop of the entire place. But the view was spectacular... I could see the entire city alight with lights that were more dazzling than the night sky in itself. A bridge was in the far distance, reflecting off the water below it, and a certain gold tint to it all, rich and beautiful. She sat us at one of the few tables placed there, a canopy over the rooftop to block harsh wind and break it before effecting the guests seated there. Candles were placed on each of the tables to give light along with some lanterns dangling on the sides.

The waitress was just as awkward as the last one, though I wasn't able to understand her, I still could understand the manner of which she acted. She handed us menus and went back down the stairs.

Some of the foods I got, for they were the familiar ways they were spelled in some Italian restaurants at home. I eventually had to ask Erik what some of the foods were that were described in Italian, most of it seafood and shellfish that I happen to be allergic to, so I stuck with the pasta dish, with some sort of meat at the side.

"Do you like it?" He asked when I put down the menu, taking a sip of the water at my side.

"Yes, definitely." I replied, looking at our surroundings one more time.

"This was the only somewhat empty spot in the restaurant for the time being." That was his excuse...

"Sure..." I replied dryly. I was sure he wanted to make it special somehow and significant. It was something I always dreamed of doing, and I probably told someone else this before, and he overheard. That was only a guess... throwing that into the vast pool of thoughts, but he had no idea how special this was to me, and I had no courage to say so.

"This is... so beautiful." I noted breathlessly. "I don't... really have many other words to describe this, honestly...But... Thanks for doing this..."

"I'm glad to oblige by your wishes."

"How did you know this was a wish?" I challenged.

He looked to me once more as if missing the entire point again and I breathed a laugh, nodding my head. "Okay, I give in... I get it..."

"_Do _you?" He asked, taking it comically.

"No, but whatever floats _your_ boat."

"Why is this funny?" He asked, laughing musically as well.

"I don't know. Somehow stalking and being on a roof in Italy put together is hilarious." I smiled and laughed again as did he.

Once the waitress came back up to take our orders, I asked Erik to order for me so I wouldn't mess up. He gladly did so, and she went off, after our orders.

"I'll be gone tomorrow for business, so I'll have someone escort you in the city in the morning." He noted, and I had to restrain myself from rolling my eyes... of course he would if he wasn't there. I must be locked up or babysat.

"You know... I'd be fine by myself..." I replied sighing.

"It'll be very difficult for one who doesn't know the language, Christine."

"I can learn..." I spat back.

"Not that quickly."

"I know French."

"Not enough." He sighed and placed his chin on his hand, glaring at me with his yellow eyes that glowed in the candlelight. "I just want you to be safe. Understand?"

"Whatever."

The waitress came back up to drinks, and Erik took mine for me, placing it by my elbow, and he took his own wine. I eyed it curiously...

"Could I try some?" I asked on a whim, arching a brow to see if he would let me.

He looked down to his glass then to me. "Really?" He asked, tilting his head to the side.

"I've had wine before at a cousin's wedding." I replied to defend myself, failing to mention that was eight years ago."Could I try some?"

"It's not illegal here, I suppose." He hinted, putting the glass toward me slowly.

_Aha... because everything you've ever done _is_ legal to begin with? _I thought to myself coldly.

I sipped at it, it's bitterness bringing back a few memories of trying alcohol for big events and in church, but... this was even more bitter. What was with Erik and these horrible tastes, anyway? I guess it just... _matches_ him. Dark and bitter, right?

I tried hard not to grimace and put the glass closer to him, leaning back in my seat. He laughed again, and I have now decided just how _much _I love his laugh.

"Bitter, is it not?" He said casually, taking a sip of it himself.

"Very..." I said, taking a sip of the iced water to get the taste out of my mouth.

"You can't blame me this time, then." He hedged, and took another swig.

"Did you... drug me that one time, with the tea that was also very bitter?" I challenged, placing my napkin onto my lap without thinking much about it.

He remained silent, looking back to his hands. I glared, knowing he wasn't going to answer that. I sighed, and played with the napkin in my lap once more.

"You _could_ be more honest, you know if wearing a mask isn't enough... At least... let me _know_ if you... wanted to sleep with me that time."

"You objected." His voice was as small as a child's. I groaned exasperatedly.

"I wasn't _ready_..." I replied, shaking my head. "No matter how many times I tell you I didn't want this, you cease to listen. Tell me this if you plan on doing things like that... I'll _hate_ it, but at least it wouldn't catch me in the middle of the night." It was the most particular conversation I've ever had, but at least... it would be off my chest in case I do happen to fall for him tonight. I shook my head and grabbed my chest at the uncertainty of my thoughts... _in case I fall for him_... "You know what? Never mind. Just... _whatever_." I hissed quietly, toying with my hands now, feeling startled tears come into my eyes.

"Is something wrong, my love? Besides this?"

"No!" I answered too quickly, and he was suspicious. "Nothing is wrong at all. I'm perfectly fine." That was partially true... I _was_ perfectly fine here with him. I couldn't think of anything better I could be doing. I was in Italy, on top of a roof with someone who loves me more than life itself, besides all the small quirky details, how else would I have wanted it?

Erik's shown me so much about myself, some things I never wanted to know, and others I simply had to know. He's shown me how to get away... and in a way he's like my father... a friend. I just wish I never hurt him before, I wish I wasn't so selfish when he could be so selfless at times. I _was_ crying now...and he saw it.

"Christine, my love, are you alright? Do you wish to leave?"

"I'm fine... I'm perfectly fine, Erik... it's just so... good right now."

"There's something more," he hinted curiously.

"Yes, there's a lot more," I agreed passively. "I'll tell you later."

"Alright, then," he muttered, trailing off.

I wouldn't ever be able to tell him that I actually do care. I hardly can admit it to myself to begin with. The rest of the dinner was basically silent, an awkward moment altogether and it was all my fault because of that. I felt horrible, seeing he couldn't move as gracefully as he did, and it was like he never met me before.

The food came eventually and I occupied myself with that, still keeping my head low as I ate, looking anywhere but where he sat. He looked at me strangely, as if I was eating something entirely ridiculous. I shifted uncomfortably and picked up my fork and chewed on a piece of meat, swallowed, and looked up again to see him not even moving toward the expensive food.

"What is it you want of me?" I asked suddenly, my fork clattering against the plate angrily.

"I-" He began, shook his head, and began debating with himself. I arched a brow, unable to resume eating, and took a sip of the water again, though I felt like I may not be able to spit it out anymore.

"It's... It's nothing..."

I restrained a faint laugh at _Erik's_ awkwardness, for it was quite laughable the way he gracefully shifted in his chair, going from hands in lap to hands on table.

"It's something..." I murmured under my breath, enough to see him look up to me, then back down instantly. "What?" I managed, smiling a little at the side. "Erik, you can tell me!"

"You wouldn't..." He trailed off, and I saw his hand come up to rub his ear. He was _such_ a little boy... it reminds me of how Raoul acted sometime... I couldn't specify when... but he was probably fourteen and he would rub his neck, pout, and go back to rubbing it again.

"Wouldn't do what?" I laughed at the thought.

"You wouldn't..." He began again, "wouldn't kiss me... would you? I don't think so... don't even think I mentioned it... Forget it."

For a second, I probably gave him the oddest stare ever, and I felt small all over again, going through middle school years awkwardly once more.

"See? Don't even ask next time. Forget it," He shifted to the side, taking a deep swig of wine. I wonder if he ever gets drunk...

"No... no, I'll... uh... kiss you."

He looked hopeful, his eyes brightened up, and I think I've never seen him more happy in my life.

"Truly?" He asked sincerely. "You would?"

I hope he doesn't mean... you know... on the lips. No, I'm not doing that.

I leaned over and took his hand. His was actually warmer than mine for the first time, and I smiled sheepishly for he looked extremely uncomfortable but overjoyed at the same time, making an odd combination of posture.

It didn't take long, I guess, I leaned over, and pressed my lips to his lower jaw bone, and leaned away, looking to his startling eyes, letting go of his hand instantly, my heart fluttering.

"I've never... been kissed before." He noted lifelessly, "My own mother would never kiss me. No, she just backed away and threw me my mask, even if it was all I asked..." He looked up to me heartily, his eyes narrowed as if he might cry again, "Thank you..."

"You're... welcome," I said quietly, still very much so awkward. I pressed my lips shut, for it wasn't much and I was used to much more divine kisses from Raoul that would leave me partly dazed and then the other part... awed. He is an _amazing_ kisser, for all those who are wondering. Yes...a _very_ good kisser.

"I love you, Christine," he muttered, looking to me long and hard.

"I know," I pressed my lips shut, on the curious note that I may continue that.

"Would you ever love me back?" Oh, why must he ask me that? I put on my best straight face.

"Maybe." I replied, looking away, using my hair as a wall between he and I, feeling my cheeks already turn a brilliant red, but I couldn't turn and look at him looking at me like that. I felt terrible, but what else could I do..?

I wasn't hungry anymore, no matter how hungry I was before. I wiped my mouth, and rested the fabric napkin on the table, and leaned my head against my hand and waited until he decides we should leave.

I wondered if Erik has ever been happy before... like _really_ happy. Do I make him happy...? Something deep in my mind only found my purpose in life is to fill out the such unhappy man's life.. Everyone should feel wonderful at least one time in your life, no matter how ugly, disgusting, or mentally unstable you are... I felt terrible, I've made him cry so many times when he deserves to _live_... to live like everyone else. He could be such a wonderful man...


	19. His Deceitful Voice

**I'm aiming for this chapter to clear a few things on Christine's mood swings... I don't intend it to be this violent, but I think it's the only way I can portray my ideas. Please don't worry... this story, I have decided will be very long with no intentions of a sequel like the last story I have written. I hope that I'm portraying this suspensefully enough, for it's not /just/ Christine, but Erik as well. Maybe when I write Erik's point of view which I do so hope to do once I complete this story later on, it will be utterly defined. For right now, Christine has _no_ idea what he's trying to do, my Erik happens to be _very_ deceitful, if you haven't guessed to begin with.**

Now, with this thing cleared up, I hope to resume my story with utter finality and peace between the two even if it does mean the extreme. Please do stay on the edge of your seat with this ending, for I've been working on it all day.

Love to all who review,

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

* * *

_Chapter 19:  
His Deceitful Voice_

The rest of the night was in content silence, or maybe discontent at the same time. I wasn't sure whether it was because he took my kiss the wrong way or perhaps he thought I didn't really mean it. I didn't know which one it was myself, so I laid off with speaking altogether, feeling like I only hurt him more if I did.

We went back to the hotel in silence, though Erik simply _had _to hold my hand, it seemed. As long as it pleased him to touch him just for a little while, I was fine. No matter _how_ bony his hand was, and despite the fact I felt like I was holding hands with a skeleton, it felt...okay. I guess? What a strange relationship.

Before we parted at my door to my room, he paused for a second, not letting me shut the door, looking at our entwined flesh for a moment, and spoke for the first time in about an hour.

"Goodnight, Christine." He replied somberly, "I'll be back at the hotel possibly after you're asleep tomorrow night. Have a nice time tomorrow, okay?"

I nodded passively, and noticed he still held my hand firmly.

"I also... wondered if you could... you know... kiss me again? I won't see you for a while, and... well, please?" He was timid again, and I knew almost instantly that this was what he was thinking for the past hour. I narrowed my eyes, taking this a bit more cruelly than I should have, and nodded.

I leaned close and pressed my lips on the other side of his jaw bone, and worked my way up to his cheek, and eventually he was so much lower before me, that I decided reluctantly to kiss his waxy forehead, and he squeezed my hand firmly before letting go of it.

"Oh," He began quietly. "You make me so happy, Christine, did you know that?" He asked, lingering on his own words for just a few seconds, as I watched him intently, feeling a little dull within myself.

"Goodnight, my sweet Christine. I love you," He bid once more, and with a swift floating movement, he turned back.

"Goodnight, Erik," I whispered, feeling my hand where he touched it, rubbing my fingers over it, "_I love you,_" I believe I said to the thin air, hearing the door shut, and I shut my own, walking into the dark room, and switching on the lights, feeling lonely once more. I dragged myself to the dresser and changed into a nightgown, turned on the television, for once having background noise, and set the timer.

I nestled into the comfortable comforter, not bothering to even put all of the covers over my somehow freezing body, and shut off the light, shutting my eyes.

I couldn't sleep.

I counted sheep, I hummed to myself, I turned off the television, and I rolled on the bed as if to be reaching for something unseen, and never was I comfortable enough to sleep at all. What did I need...? I tried to push all thoughts out of my mind, I listened to my own music that would play in my mind over and over again... but the only most comforting thing was to rethink listening to Erik's musical voice tell me things, sing me to sleep, and sing with me... With that as my only thought for the night, nothing rebelling against it, no hard feelings, I fell asleep comfortably.

I awoke to an obnoxious beeping sound... since when did I have an alarm clock? I groaned, trying to block it out without having to turn it off with my pillow, but it didn't work. I thought about throwing it across the room but then they'd be wondering why the room wouldn't have an alarm clock like all the others do. I raised an arm and began probing it to find a switch of some sort, turning on the radio that I didn't understand, listening to classical music, and then finding it extremely loud and fuzzy, until the next switch cut the entire thing off. I was never good with alarm clocks which explained _a lot. _Who turned the damn thing on, anyway?

Erik.

Well, duh. And how did he get in? There's a reason why the lock is on the other side of the door from where my room is connected to his. Clever, huh?

Letting out a disgruntled moan, I found light cascading through the room when I finally opened my eyes, and it was warm and wonderful.

I did the customary morning things in order to get ready, wearing one of my nicer summer outfits for whomever was going to let me venture about Florence with them as a babysitter. I hated the idea as much as anything, of course, but I didn't hate it enough that I'd have Erik yell at me again. _Anything_ but that.

Where was I to meet this babysitter, anyway? Surely Erik didn't leave me to guess if he didn't want me to hurt myself. My questions were eventually answered when the man who set the stupid alarm clock left a note on the writing desk next to the television.

_Christine-_

_You'll meet your caretaker for the day in the lobby when you're finished around ten_._ Be good._

Yours,

_Erik_

What? He times me? Well... I don't know if I should be surprised or not, but it was certainly strange because by the time I read the note, I looked at the clock on the nightstand which read 9:52, and narrowed my eyes. How... perverse? I'm not sure... He times me when I'm getting ready... Well, he's gone now, and I don't have to be awkward now. I was on my own-well, somewhat alone- today and I could do whatever for the day and I was in _Italy,_ how much better could it get? I'll have to thank Erik for this later.

I grabbed my purse which happened to be next to my phone, and my wallet which lay out next to it. He provided me with euros, of course... which I supposed was _a lot_. I sighed to myself, not sure of what to think, and put the wallet into my purse, and opened the phone curiously, searching through the contacts to find that a few people were missing from the list. To begin with, Raoul was gone and Meg was as well. I wasn't sure if anyone else was missing, and Erik's name was definitely still there, though I wasn't sure whether I would need to reach him or not. Whatever business that he'd be attending to that would take up an entire day shouldn't be interrupted. A small part of me couldn't wait for him to return so I'd tell him of everything I saw and put thanks upon him if I could do anything else.

I smiled, and walked out of the room, putting the key to the door carefully inside my wallet. I walked down the familiar stairs and into the lobby, not knowing who exactly I would see, for it was pretty busy for it being the morning and everyone is taking leave.

"Christine Daae?" Someone said my name in a thick accent, and powerful voice.

I turned to see a girl possibly no older than I, and I smiled bleakly.

"That would be me," I said, acting to be enthusiastic... She looks like I could ditch her at any time when she's turned around. Maybe that's exactly what I'll do.

"Signore said to help you around Florence..." She said half to herself and then somewhat to me. Okay, then...

"That's probably what he did." I said encouragingly.

"So... what you like to do last?" She asked, suddenly enlightened. I squinted my eyes, and shook my head.

"You mean first?"

"Yes, yes... first. Pardon me, English is not... very good."

"I understand," I said. "Well... what is there?"

"Sightseeing? No?" She asked timidly.

"Sure, yeah..." I guess...

"Very well. How about... the Duomo? And how about after that, the Museo?"She asked in an even thicker Italian accent. I felt bad for hardly understanding but I knew Museo meant museum and that was something I was definitely wanting to do.

"Sure." I shrugged and we walked out of the hotel without another word. I assumed we were walking today, so I was somewhat glad to be wearing comfortable sandals.

It was humid, but with a breeze that came through periodically to cool things down. The sights were astounding as we walked along the sidewalk, further than I've been. A large tower was tolling the hour, and she waved her hand toward it.

"Giotto's Bell Tower. Would you want to see inside?" She asked, and I looked up it with an unsteady glance, and then to her and shrugged.

"Sounds cool." I replied, and we walked closer to a line of people near the door to the large clock tower.

It went on as so. We waited in line to go up the large tower and get a good view of the city from there, which was very exciting.

"Sorry, I don't believe I got your name," I said whilst going up the stairs.

"Gianna," She smiled absently, and looked around awkwardly seeming very timid. That was rather annoying, though, if anyone who I have for accompaniment, I would much like them to be social. I huffed and crossed my arms, looking at the line ahead of us and sighed.

"So... you only know signore by that name?" I asked conversationally. She looked at me oddly and I backed off.

She nodded as if she just admitted a crime. I didn't push her any further, though she wasn't the ideal person to be with, I now just scornfully wanted this day to be over with.

The view from the tower was remarkable, just as I theorized, and I took it all in like a sponge since I had no camera to remember this time by.

I wished I could just have someone better to talk to who knows English as well as I did... it was a time that I longed for Meg again, to be by my side and comment on people as they walk by, and shop and laugh as good friends do. What was I thinking? It was better than being stuck in the hotel room all day, right? I glowered on it for a second... I guess.

We went to the fabulous museums with works of Michelangelo and all these different artists that I've only read of, and read about different architecture with my personal translator, Gianna. The rest of the day was almost a blur.. I don't think I remember much when I think back on it. I felt miserable being here, and slightly besides myself. I guess having Gianna around makes me think about my friends and how they would make life better. And _Raou_l... I hardly thought about him anymore which explains why I thought I was falling for Erik last night.

My eyes brightened at the thought, utterly confused and bedazzled at the same time. Italy held no more interest to me. I wanted to go back to America and find a way out of this, for I couldn't resume being this uncomfortable... He was sucking me into his trap and I was too suffocated to realize it. Look at what he's done to me!

I was a mess coming back into the hotel room early after eating dinner and dismissing Gianna, who kindly waved off, smiled, and turned back to leave me. I don't know if I should be guilty or not, but Erik seemed to have just ruined my Italian dreams and wishes. He ruined it _all _just like he ruined my life which was a mess.

I stayed in the hotel room, sipping at coffee into the later hours of the night, watching shows I hardly paid attention to.

I think it was one in the morning when Erik came back, and he noticed my light was still on for some reason, and knocked on my door. I didn't answer for the longest time until, finally, he broke in, looking at me curiously.

"Surely you must be tired," He noted, coming closer to me. I blinked at him, and stood there dully, putting the coffee onto the nightstand.

"Did you have a good time?" He asked, and I drooped my lids to look at my hands, trembling unconsciously, and shook my head in the negative.

"I don't think it rained, did it? Was it too hot?" He asked cautiously, coming nearer and nearer with every word, and I felt myself gradually backing away, feeling my entire body crumple from underneath me. "Oh, darling, tell me what happened? Was Gianna not nice? I thought you would have a great time with her... oh, answer... You can't be so sad."

"Go away, Erik..." I hissed quietly, not bothering to look back up. "Please... I can't sleep and you're not helping."

He grabbed my shoulders, and seemed like he would shake me, so I tried to squirm out of his grasp, and I felt his hand underneath my chin and trying to tilt it up when I slapped it away. This was becoming maddening.

"Tomorrow's your birthday, isn't it? Isn't this what you've always wanted?"

Oh, right... eighteen... an adult, no longer a child, and I have to grow up. I have to get over this...

"Go away," I hissed, becoming more upset that he wasn't listening.

"Christine-"

"YOU NEVER LISTEN! Go _away!_" I snapped at him, throwing his arms off of me angrily.

Without saying something, he seemed to be _amused_ by my anger, and his eyes squinted as he would when I do such a thing. I got up to push him out, knowing it wouldn't take much. A part of me thinks I've been scammed from childhood, seemed to be wiped from it completely, I felt like an adult for these three years without parents. And even more so when I'm supposed to be _married._ It must be a lie. This must be some nightmare, really. Whatever happened to that wonderful life dad had in store for us two? Hmm?

After that train of thought, Erik was still standing there caught between disbelief and amusement.

"Did you honestly not hear me?" I think I laughed then, not a good laugh, it kind of sounded like a gag.

He put both hands up and began to back away, still looking deeply amused, and I wanted to slap him a few times just to get him to wake up from this deep fantasy he put me in and then took me right out of just leaving me.

Out of all the insults I shouted at him... I never seemed to mention hate... It might have been guessed somewhere in there, but nowhere in there was it direct. I just... _couldn't_.

I wanted to sleep, but all I did was remain with my eyes wide open thinking of nothing... just _staring_.

Italy was probably something just to get me to believe that I didn't hate him, to dazzle me enough that I felt nothing sincere anymore. _Ugh_. .. How could he _do_ this?

I cried myself to sleep that night, sniffling, knowing right off the bat that this was going to be a _terrible_ birthday. I mean, not that I didn't have anything worse, but I was going to be feeling like crap the entire day because I want to _leave_ and I won't _be _leaving for another few days. Not that I wanted to get home again and be locked up... I actually didn't know.

I tried to think on the positive side like I usually could, but I found none. I felt in a cage again, more emotion than I've had in a long time. _Real_ emotion. He was acting like a monster, eating me up like this and then spitting me back out when I realized what I've been doing these last few days.

I woke up in the morning to find him sitting there, watching me sleep. I could've screamed but I didn't have the urge to open my mouth. He was just so _ghost-_like it was terrible!

"Happy birthday!" He said enthusiastically, probably hoping I was back where I was two days ago. I grimaced, and saw that he was holding a small box in his hand. What _now_?

"I have a little something I got for you yesterday when I was out... a present of sorts... would you like to see?"

I shook my head in the negative, not wanting anything from him at the moment.

"Oh, nonsense... don't you want a birthday present? I know you haven't had one in three years..." He tried to lure me in, and I didn't move, trying to rebel against it, and he was saddened, I suppose to see that it wasn't working again.

"Could I show it to you and then you decide whether you want it or not? I'll return it to the store before we leave if you decide otherwise..." He sighed. That worked, I guess, so I shrugged, and he almost instantly rose from his seat and brought it to me, golden wrapping and silver bow and all. It was just a small box, with beautiful designs adorning it. He watched me with burning eyes, taking my finger and begin to open it carefully, feeling ashamed if I tear the beautiful paper. I carefully untied the ribbon, placing it on the bed beside me, and took off the lid carefully, to reveal something shiny. I removed the paper entirely, placing the box on my lap, and took out a silver chain that was a charm bracelet. Tiny golden charms were fixed on the silver rings that linked together. One was in the shape of an angel with a silver halo, the next, a music clef with diamonds embedded in it, and the third was a dove, with diamond eyes.

I tried not to cry, looking over the beautiful trinket, fingering with it and quietly fawning over it. Nobody has ever given me something this special. I didn't have the most horrible heart in the world at the second, so I let him put it on my wrist, as gentle as a feather, once more as if I might shatter.

I watched his hands wrap around my wrist with inhuman dexterity, it was graceful and serene, as if my hurtful words meant nothing. _He doesn't get the hint_, I thought to myself, letting my arm fall slowly to my side, and still looking at the bracelet he placed on my wrist curiously.

"This is only the beginning. I have one more surprise for you, if you choose to go with it. It will require formal clothing once more later on, though." He said almost to himself and to me.

"I don't think I like surprises anymore, Erik." I murmured, "I don't at all..." I shook my head, lifting a hand to wipe away tears, but he beat me to it, wiping them with his gloved hand, sending chills up my spine. "Why must you control me so, Erik?" I asked slowly, playing with the bracelet around my wrist.

He wasn't going to answer. I frowned, grimacing. "Answer me!" I hissed. That seemed to startle him, which was effective enough for at least these moments. He was getting to the point that he was understanding. This was good.

"I just... want..." He began, and I shushed him.

"There... see? _You_ want it... _you _want it so much, don't you?" I scoffed. "So much that you turn and twist me until I'm nothing, Erik... You'll _never_ earn my love like that!" I hissed, realizing it to myself once more.

He was silent, reluctant to admit to his own crime.

"I don't know what you want of me any longer. I don't see reason why I have to stay here. I'm eighteen... I can leave now."

"You're _not_ leaving me." He hissed, suddenly, taking me aback, and my fire was immediately flickered out when he was taking to toll on me now, and I backed away, in fear he would slap me right there. "You sniveling child..." I heard him scoff coldly under his breath.

"You selfish jerk!" I spat right back at him. "How _dare _you play with me like that... with your damned voice! With your damn..." I was going to say charm, but caught myself instantly, glaring, "Why... do you toy with me so?"

"I didn't know..." He began, and I cut him off, but then looked to him for his voice was suddenly bittersweet, and I looked up.

"What?"

"I don't understand, Christine... what are you _talking _about...?"

"_What do you mean you don't 'understand' what I'm talking about_!" I hissed, raising my hand to slap him angrily, my cheeks turning a brilliant red, and I felt like I should kick him.

"Christine! Calm down..." He said, taking my hand before it reached him with the reflexes of a cat. "Explain, please."

"I don't need to explain anything!" I cried, tearing my wrist away. "I never wanted to..."I began, not able to articulate the rest of the sentence.

"Never wanted to what?"

"I never meant to..." I coughed back tears that were flowing down. "I hate you! I hate you for making me love you!" I screamed at him, and threw my pillow to him, which he easily dodged. "Your damned voice! I hate it! I hate it!" I barked, and hid my face ashamedly into the pillow, not wanting to move. "I hate being like this!" I screamed into the pillow.

I just wish I couldn't feel again. I want to be numbed again. I don't want to love anymore and I don't want to _be loved _for it was wretched! Oh... Oh what am I to do? He must think me insane with all these damn mood swings! He must bring it upon me with myself, and with his voice and swing me back and forth to persuasion to hatred... What is he doing!?

"We shall leave, then." He rushed quickly, grabbing my wrists, sounding utterly cold. "We'll go back to America. You don't deserve to see La Scala anyway!"

I didn't care at the moment, all I could do was try to get my wrists away from his hard grasp, until he let me drop onto the bed.

"Pack your bags, Christine, we're leaving tonight."


	20. Unbroken

_Chapter 20:  
Unbroken_

I don't think I could have rebelled, for I was at a complete loss for words. I threw all my clothes from the wardrobe onto the bed, making them into a big pile onto the bed, sobbing each time I ruined something Erik once bought for me, looking at my bracelet still on my wrist. I sighed after a while, and planted myself, face-down on the bed, and cried until I couldn't cry anymore. Erik didn't bother to interrupt, I guess he was doing the same thing I was.

It didn't take long to angrily throw all my clothes back into the few bags that I brought with me not bothering to put the dresses I could've worn once more onto a hanger, and felt something that I couldn't make out in the deep pit of my stomach. Guilt again, huh? I grabbed a glass from the counter near the sink in the bathroom and filled it with water, thinking I could drink out my guilt, but nothing happened.

Sighing, I went back, groaning ever so often. The _worst _birthday ever. I liked it much better when I decided that I could ignore my birthdays like an old woman, without feeling and no smile, and no birthday cake. No party, no gifts, because I felt like I had no actual reason to live anymore.

That was the same feeling I had right now, staring at the clock. If I couldn't love Erik, he still won't ever let me go, and he's carried out every promise he's made thus far. He's made me happy for a certain length of time, he's married me, and he treats me as his wife as I treat him as dirt. If I couldn't love Erik, and I couldn't return to Raoul, than what was the point of being here anymore? I groaned and pulled the pillow to my face, and just laid there for a while... I got what I wanted, at least, no longer could I feel anything anymore after a length of necessary pain.

Erik came through the door finding me like this on the bed, looking like a mess.

"Clean yourself up, child!" He hissed, and I could feel him coming closer. "We're leaving in a half an hour." He ordered briskly, and dryly. "Christine, did you hear me! Get up!"

"You can't tell me what to do!" I screamed into the pillow.

"I am your guardian, and I can tell you what to do as much as I want! Unless you want to be locked up here for who knows how long, I suggest you get up!"

Slowly, I rose from the bed, feeling as light as some dead creature, and I faced him with a scornful glare.

"Did you mean it?" He asked quietly, despite his even harsher glare to me.

"Mean what?" I asked.

"You said that... you loved me..."

I had no answer to that, and he simply dropped me back down to the bed, obviously becoming more angrier as I remained silent. He dashed out of the room awkwardly, losing a little of his patience within each second of my obvious insubordination.

I finished packing my bags and waited for Erik to come and fetch me, sitting by the open window and looking down to the streets below and Florence all and all again, saying my farewell for I barely got to know the city. Oh, well...

He walked in too soon, seeing me at the window.

"It's time to go," He whispered delicately.

I nodded, and rose from the chair, taking the bags into my hands, and over my shoulder and walked out behind him, as he took my free hand firmly.

The plane ride was horrifically silent, so I slept for a few hours, not wanting to read, watch television or do anything, really. I hardly wanted to breathe.

"I'm sorry," He said quietly, and I responded by blinking a few times.

"Why are you sorry?" I asked, feeling like a mother.

"For ruining everything." He said quietly.

"You didn't ruin _everything_..." I replied, looking out the window, putting my head against my hand.

"I honestly didn't know-"

"I know." I rolled my eyes.

It was awkward for a moment, and I felt in my bag for a book that could possibly keep me busy.

"From now on, I'll listen. I'll do anything you would like me to do. Just don't think horrible of me when I only wish..."

"I get it," I replied acidly.

"Could we start over?"

"No." I replied without making any thoughts about the question itself.

He sighed, and that was the end of the only conversation we shared in the six hours of the plane ride, and it seemed to go by quicker than the last one.

Even the car ride home was awkward, it was like being tugged by just my hand. Ugh... I can't believe I'm calling Erik's mansion home now. It's my only home, though, it's the only home I've ever stayed at for this long and hated it because I had no other choice.

I guess what happens next is something like... wishful thinking. I couldn't make it out to begin with, and I was utterly startled when I came across it. There was a car in front of the mansion, and man. A_ familiar_ man. I blinked a few times and looked to Erik who looked no different from where he was, and beginning to tense up with some murderous glare.

"Stay in the car, Christine." He demanded under his breath, and swiftly got out, leaving me entirely befuddled and no explanation as to what Nadir was doing here, and why he was so angered.

"Let her go, Erik." Was what I could make up from the man's heavy accent. I couldn't hear the rest, but Erik was crumpling slowly by every word the man seemed to utter, becoming lower and lower, but finally straightened himself out over time. My pulse began to speed, wary of whatever was coming next.

Before I knew it, the door opened, and a black gloved hand was outstretched for me to take, and it was trembling ever so slightly. I took it, and he helped me out of the car, and nodded to his "friend" and the man named Nadir drove away.

I looked up to Erik, completely confused.

"I'll explain later, love, let's go inside, shall we?" He asked, and I didn't respond, keeping a hand on my back and led me inside.

"Why was he here, Erik?" I had to ask though I knew he wasn't going to answer.

"I must tell you later, but for right now, don't even think about it." I nodded, through I knew I wasn't going to follow exactly that.

Anne met us at the door, and grabbed my bags with a reassuring smile, and turned to put them upstairs, without another word, seeing Erik's demising sullen outlook, which was quite odd to see without him bluntly hiding it.

"Could we sing, Christine? I have a surprise for you today, a birthday present, if you will. All I ask from you now is that you sing. Will you do that?" He asked shakily, and I narrowed my eyes suspiciously, feeling my heart drop. This must be something horrible, then... I hate surprises now, I just really didn't want to know what this was to be.

I nodded slowly, and he grabbed my hand with all the care that he once had before, and led me to the music room without even bothering to let me rest for a little while. His thumb rubbed over the top of my hand as he looked at it fondly.

"You're so soft...so soft..." I heard him whisper, once we reached the room. "Now, Christine... please give me your best this lesson, okay? I just really want to hear your voice again, because you and I both know that it's an angel's voice. I've taught you well, have I not, Christine?"

This was now really getting odd. He never was this intimate before a lesson, usually he turns from whatever he was before to business-like and all... Well like the incredible musician he is, that I always wanted to meet, that I'm always left awestruck after he plays something.

"You do want to study music, did you not? What your father wanted, of course, right?" He sounded like he was reassuring himself things.

"Erik... I don't understand..." I replied, furrowing my brow even more concernedly.

"You will soon, my beautiful Christine, you will." He sat onto the piano bench, straightening himself out once more, and placed his fingers over the keys. "On 'do', begin," he said methodically, and raised his hand to signal me to sing. I took in a deep breath, and sang the notes in the melodic order, and went up a step just like always, trying to perfect it so we wouldn't have to go over it again. It was just like Italy never happened, like he intended it on being.

"Good, now the aria we were working on, please, I believe we still have polishing. Where we left off, of course..." He said, assuring himself once more, throwing his hand back and handing me the sheets of music, and I looked over it again, and looking to him oddly when he was reluctant to begin playing the opening. When he saw I was looking at him very strangely, he turned back quickly and hurriedly went into the lush notes, sweeping the room with sound.

He directed me when to start singing, and I did so, taking in a deep breath, opening my throat, aligning it, and let the sound come out like a door opening, just as he told me to imagine it as.

I sang with as much emotion as I should, colliding everything I was feeling into that song, and it was probably the most emotionally-draining piece I've ever sung. It was like I was saying goodbye again, to my father, saying goodbye to everyone else who has affected my life dearly and critically.

I gave my soul to music in that piece, I gave it all away for I had no place to put it elsewhere. And in a strange and utmost feeling to it, it was like I was locking those feelings to Erik as he played the beautiful piano, going with the music as he usually does, his eyes shutting underneath that horrible mask of his.

It was much too soon that the aria ended, and I wanted more... I wanted more of it to let go, I wanted to listen to this music, and cry at his feet, begging for forgiveness, I wanted to leave everything and run away with the music. It's all I've ever really wanted.

As if he read my thoughts, he began to play the opening to the duet, and began to sing... oh, how his voice was so heartfelt, how it spoke to me, how I felt like I could cry when all I could do was sing _and_ cry... at the same time, and how horrible it felt... how indecent that we couldn't come up with this.

Our voices were like one, admitting my hidden love, and him admitting his own, and it was probably an opera within an opera, dramatic... and so overwhelming, as if I was floating with him.

But it stopped, and I felt myself stopping instantly, and dropping to the floor, holding both sides of my chest to keep myself from breaking

I blinked a few times, disbelievingly.

"Go to your room, Christine," He said quietly.

"But..."

"This is all I've wanted from you tonight. Get some rest, and be ready to wake early." His voice was drained from any emotion that he had through his music.

"But Erik..."

"_Please, Christine. _Just go. I don't want to see you right now."

That was like a knife stabbing through my chest. Ouch, it hurt. I nodded slowly, and felt my feet beginning to move when the other part of me was standing where I stood when singing, leaving my heart behind as I trudged out of the room, shutting the door ever so lightly.

I stayed outside of the room for a moment, until I heard frighteningly angry music playing. It reminded me of a ship in the sea with a storm beginning to loom over it. It was so pained, every note, as if every note was killing the player himself. I covered my ears, and ran to my room where I thought I could escape from this madness, but to no prevail.

It was still _in my mind_! It was playing over and over, those dreadful notes, and they were all I could hear through these thick walls, directly below me.

I didn't have the strength to cry, I didn't have the strength to just jump out the window right now and run. I laid on the bed, my eyes pried open by something unseen, staring at the ceiling with about as much life as a doll would have when the stuffing has been taken out.

"Christine." Erik's voice was through the door suddenly, but he wasn't standing there yet, and when he stood before me, he looked astonished that I was still awake. "I-I thought you were sleeping..."

I stared at him, with no reaction at all.

"I didn't mean to... do anything, you know... I just wanted to... to be near you. Is that too much to ask?" he asked quietly.

I shook my head in the negative, clasping the covers. "I can't sleep," I noted dully, and looked to him hopefully. "Will you sing to me again?" I asked with a small voice.

"Yes, of course... anything, my angel..." He sat in the chair, looking like a ghost in this dark room as he moved across, his eyes glowing in the dim light of the moon, and I had to look away. He sang a familiar lullaby he used to sing for me before he forced marriage, and when he tried to comfort me away from my fate of being with him for all this time. I didn't want to remember, I wanted to do what he said,"to start over". And I somehow found myself doing so, when drowning myself into his voice, letting my eyes lower, and I felt his fingers run through my hair with reverence that he's always had when touching me so.

I was so soothed, that I forgot the dreadful music he played on the piano that night when I left the room, I fell into a deep sleep... but it wasn't so deep that I wasn't dreaming.

_The sun was just setting, and we were standing on the cliff facing the familiar lighthouse in Maine, and nothing was heard except for the waves crashing against the rocks swiftly, most tourists gone from the location at this hour. I sat on the rocks next to Erik, just as old as I was now, and he the exact same.__head to see that he was no longer there. I looked around, feeling my heart begin to pace. "Erik?" I asked the thin air, seeing that he was nowhere to be found. Maybe he was playing a trick on me. Maybe this was all a game._right_ there like he always is, always at my reach when I need him._

"Isn't it beautiful, Erik?" I asked, leaning my head against his shoulder as he ran his fingers through my hair. He didn't answer, and I didn't seem to care at the moment, simply enjoying his presence."I told you it would be splendid, didn't I? I don't think anyone could live and not want to see this, right?" I asked myself.

"This is like an artist painted it," I said, my eyelids lowering from the peace I had in myself. It wasn't for a while that I noticed that Erik wasn't about to answer to any of my comments, and I turned my

"Erik?" I asked even louder, beginning to run around the plateau where the rocks reach the sea. I called his name over and over, expecting him to be

I went back to the spot where we were sitting to find him still not there. With a sudden horrible thought in my head, I looked down the side of the tall, pointed rocks to find Erik falling into the water, and disappeared into the depths of the ocean, half-expecting a monster to come and eat him up.

"ERIK!" I screamed, beginning to sob.

A hand was on my shoulder, and a smiling Raoul greeted me, smiling as I sobbed.

"He's gone now," Raoul said with the tone of a hero just winning in a battle. I looked at him disbelievingly, and called Erik's name, going against Raoul's arms as they wrapped around me, trying to get to the sea, and try to believe it wasn't true.

That was when I was nudged to wake up, and my eyes opened up brightly.

"Christine, wake up... I'm right here... Christine..." Erik's voice was soft in my ear, and he was right there in the dim light. I gave a sigh of relief and felt tears already staining my cheeks. "What is it?"

"A horrible dream..." I replied slowly, wiping the tears away, not bothering to explain what, exactly, it was, for it was strange, and I was too fascinated with the bite of reality coming back to me. "I don't want to think about it." I whispered, looking to him. "It was so _real_..."

He shook his head, and rubbed my cheek carefully, as I laid there looking up to his masked face. I didn't know what to think when my hand raised up to stroke his mask, as if it was always his face, when the corpse and the different man lay under it. I'd never forget that... I never have, I just chose to wipe it away from my memories. He took my hand and took it away from his head, carefully putting it back onto the bed.

"You should get dressed. I have a surprise for you today, and I think this will be your favorite one." He said this with as much emotion as a rock.

That hurt, too... what was he getting at? I obeyed without any question and got up from the bed, watching him leave me be once more. I dug through my packed bags, and got out a random shirt and jeans, took a really quick shower, and walked out of my room with a feeling that this may not be something I will thoroughly enjoy.

He was sitting there at the dining table, watching me with as much intensity as ever, and I could hardly eat. I only took a couple bites of the pancakes and looked at the rest of the dish as if it was going to eat me whole if I resumed eating from it.

"What will we be doing? You know I hate surprises," I noted dully.

"I'm afraid, this time you'll have to see for yourself." With a shaking hand, he handed me my cell phone, placing it before me, and looked to me expectantly.

I looked at him questioningly.

"You'll need it later." He replied quietly, and rose from the table. "Are you finished?" He asked, his voice already breaking. I nodded in the positive and followed him out of the room, and eventually out the front door.

He helped me into the car, into the front seat, after watching the butler close the trunk after putting something I couldn't see into it, I couldn't peel my eyes off of Erik, who looked like he was crumbling slowly at the driving wheel.

"I have to do this, you see..." He began silently, his voice breaking even more, but fixed his eyes strictly on the road in front of him. "I have to do this because I love you and I want you to be happy. I love you more than life itself... Know that much. Whatever harm I have brought to you, I do not mean... I did not mean to make you so broken... Oh, how much I hated that... I never wanted that for you."

I had nothing to say, of course, still startled out of my whits, and trembling all over. What was he_ doing?_

We drove on a few more minutes, reaching society finally, and into a town with several high-rise buildings.

"I know you wanted to be with friends, and I hatefully admit that I have denied you that... you belong in the light, Christine, where everyone can awe of you just as I have." He added on, driving through a red light, obviously not paying attention, but nothing was effected too horribly.

We stopped in front of a large building that looked like apartments. "You're older now, of course... and enough to go to where you'd like to study..." he sighed, finally looking to me with these eyes that I swear held all the sadness a human could ever contain.

"And so, Christine, I'm letting you go to where you need to be," He reached into a pocket and pulled out an envelope, "I've already filled out the forms for you, and there is no need to audition, I have recorded you and sent it in, and then they willingly took you in, just as I have imagined. You'll find your friend, Meg, who is studying here as well. This is all the information you'll need, including your dormitory key, tell them who you are and everything will be taken care of." He sighed, and I could tell he was holding back another sob. "Your bags are in the back, and enough money to last until you're able to make it up, for I believe you are ready."

I looked at him, entirely awestruck, not able to move. He grabbed my hand, and looked at the ring with reverence once more."Christine, you must know how much I love you, once more... I know you'll dazzle them with your voice just as you have always. Your father would be very proud." He said fondly, lifting his mask up slightly, and pressing his lips tenderly onto my hand, and, with my other hand, I opened the door.

"My number is on your phone, of course, if you ever need me again, which I don't think you will." He said sadly, and I felt my hand go to the pocket where my much fought over cell phone lay.

"And you will wear the ring, won't you? If you wear it... Erik will remain your friend... if not... then he will not be able to protect you any longer." He said just before I got out of the car, grabbing my hand once more.

I nodded slowly in the positive and, with a fluttering heart, I stepped out of the car, looking behind me to see "Peabody Conservatory" titled on the building.

"Goodbye, Christine..." He whispered under his breath, letting my hand go, and shut the door.

* * *

***Sniff Sniff*... I was crying when writing this... I'm such a crybaby. In fact, I cried in the new Harry Potter movie which I just saw yesterday... *sigh*... Well, things will be a little less of a bumpier ride since Erik backed out. It's what is best for my characters, at least... Well, tell me what you think. Good, bad, horrible? I need your opinion, of course, but I'm afraid I can't oblige by everyone with the plot I have in my mind still.**

REVIEW!

Love to all g'night or g'day to whoever cares.

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**


	21. Definition of Hell

**Sorry about the slower update... I've been busy helping my friend with a theater camp and I haven't found enough energy to sit down and write. It's not ending any time soon, just to let you know, so no worries. I'll probably have another chapter up tomorrow because I won't be going to the camp tomorrow so be expecting! I'm kinda torn on what to do... Not to worry, I'll have it together soon enough. Enjoy and review please!**

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_Chapter 21:_

_Definition of Hell  
_

He _left_ me... Who would have thought that he would have done this? I surely didn't. I think my head was so wrapped around that he wouldn't _ever_ leave me alone... and I felt betrayed standing on the curb, watching as the black car quickly drove off.

"Christine!" A high voice squeaked, and I turned around, and looked to see the black-haired pixie-like girl coming toward me, from the entrance to the building, her arms clinging onto me with a strong grip. I had to blink a few times to slowly realize it was Meg, bouncing up and down, gleefully clapping her hands.

"Oh, God, I thought I'd _never_ see you again!" She laughed, grabbing a few of my bags from me, and helped me into the place without saying another word. I gave a bleak, confused smile, and looked at her.

"It's good to see you, too..." I murmured since she didn't let me talk beforehand.

"So how did he finally let you go? I mean, it must have took a _lot_ of convincing, and trust issues, but I was _so_ surprised to find that we signed up for the same conservatory, I mean how _awesome_ is this!"

I thought about telling her all about it, but let it go, not finding it the best idea ever. There were tears threatening to fall out of simple surprise and disbelief, too overwhelmed by everything that I couldn't seem to take it all in at all.

"Are you alright, Chris? You look like you're about to be sick." She grabbed my shoulder carefully, as we approached the desk. The secretary looked up to me with her studious and cheap glasses, her bright red hair messily tied into a bun that was supposed to be formal. I always hated people like that.

"I take it you are Christine Daae," She said with a thick New York accent.

"Yes," I replied a little too quietly.

"Pardon?" She asked, already becoming annoyed.

"Yes, I am Christine," I answered louder.

"You already have your things set, and ready, right?" She asked carelessly.

Well, that's what Erik did, I suppose. Setting this whole thing up for me... how quickly could he have done this anyway? We just got back from Italy two days ago and now he's whisking me away... and telling me I'd never see him again. I just... I don't think I was ready like he thought I was. I didn't even get to say _goodbye_. I nodded, realizing I was probably staring off to space whilst thinking all of this.

"Everything will be ready in your dormitory and all, and here is your schedule and list of classes." She gave me a few sheets of paper, and Meg took my arm and began leading me toward an elevator.

"Are you alright?" she asked, pressing one of the buttons.

"I'm not sure." I replied unsteadily, feeling like something was just torn out of my heart and stomped on a few times, or squeezing it until it hurt. I could grab my chest and break down crying right now but that would be too strange. Out of all the things in the world, saying "goodbye" was probably the hardest thing for me to do, no matter what he's done to me, but he took me away no matter how desperately he wanted me, and said I might not see him again because he loves me... he loves me _so_ much... and I hate to believe that I don't love him so much back.

Meg gripped my shoulder and had to almost pull me down the corridor until we reached a specific dorm number and opened it for me, whilst I dully held my bags over my shoulder.

I was stunned with colors and her overly-intuitive and high sense in fashion just by the look of her room. Everything _had_ to match, and if it didn't, there was a trash bin next to a bunch of boxes near the door to what looked to be a medium-sized bathroom, and a large window overlooking the city.

"You like it? I worked hard on it all week once I found out I was rooming with you." She smiled and placed the bags on the bed that held unopened boxes labeled with my name. I looked at them curiously, and with questioning eyes to Meg. "Oh... this guy brought them in for you. He was the silent type so... I didn't get much from him, just that you were coming and I was excited."

She jumped onto her bed, causing the rebelling coils to squeak annoyingly.

"Want me to help?" She asked.

I nodded, not bothering to open my mouth only to have my voice crack. I opened one of the boxes to find a bedding set, and another to find some things to store shoes in for the closet was rather small. The other boxes were filled with things you would find in a room, of course, an alarm clock, and all the supplies I need to stay here.

In the final box which was the smallest of them all, held things that I must have left behind, already brought back to me. One was the ticket and playbill that I kept in the desk that he would have seen, and my pictures of my family put into a small and pretty album so I didn't have to travel with them in a messy envelope, and finally, a small note at the bottom of the box which had Erik's messy handwriting scrawling my name across the folded piece of paper, along with my diary that I had kept in the writing desk in the room that always held me. He must have read it... I wasn't sure what I thought of this, but the things in there should have never been shown to him... Were these stupid pieces of paper put together to make a recollection of thoughts and sanity the gateway to his recklessness on setting me free?

I looked at the note then to the diary, and I placed them carefully into the box without Meg looking, and put them under the bed carefully.

"Why do you seem so upset...?" Meg suddenly questioned, sounding rather upset. I pivoted on a foot to turn and look at her, holding back tears.

"I'm not upset. I just... don't know what to do is all." I lied easily, for I have done so wonderfully at lying before. If I can make believe I'm not upset about Erik leaving me here to wither, then I won't be upset, right? This is what I wanted... right? To be on stage, to sing in front of people again... and be in opera... right? I don't need Erik's help any longer, though I owe a large mass of my pride to him. To be certain, I owe just about everything dealing with music to him... I felt like I didn't even _know _or _love _music until I met Erik.

"You still look like you are going to be sick... or that you saw a ghost... will you_ please_ tell me what's wrong so I can rest tonight...? You're away from the creepy man..."

Creepy man... is that all he is?

"I can't tell you," I muttered under my breath, running my finger over the ring, sighing to myself. Meg watched me so carefully, and I saw her eyes move to where I was touching my hand.

"Why do you still wear that ring of his...?" She pressed suspiciously. "You're no longer with him... it makes no sense at all." She sighed, and I watched as she was beaten up by my silence as the impatient girl she was.

"Because, Meg... because I can't _tell_ you_. _I can't tell anything to you without you being so _judgmental_." That was true, but I had to get her to shut up if I put it so coldly.

She was silent for a second, sitting on her bed, legs criss-crossed on the bed and staring at me speculatively.

"Okay, Christine... if that's how it is, then I'll just keep my mouth shut, if that makes you happy." She sighed warily.

"That _is_ how it is... I just _don't_ want to talk about it." I felt like I just broke up with my soul, leaving it with my bitterness to myself from now on.

There was a long pause, what seemed to last for an hour, simply staring at each other and deciding over one another's fates, commenting to ourselves in our own heads until she broke the awkwardness, and turned to go on helping me unpack.

"If you can't trust your best friend, then who are you going to trust, Chris?"

"No one." I replied sourly, for it was true... I can't trust anyone for they would think the wrong thing... and if it was anything I hated the most it was being in the wrong this entire time... it just felt all strange inside my stomach, that I should have never contributed to this strange relationship to begin with. I had no intentions of getting the authorities into this, to tell on Erik, though I doubt they'd ever catch him to begin with.

I can't act like this never happened, though, for he was in the wrong of stalking me all these years, all this time, violent and strange...

"He wasn't even a guardian, was he?" She asked bitterly, turning to me once more after another pause in this strange ordeal.

"...As far as I know," I replied silently, and then groaned.

"But my mom said-"

"MEG! I just said _I _don't want to _talk _about it _at all_! It never happened... it won't happen again... just get _over _it! Curiosity killed the cat, after all." I spat, slamming the empty box onto the ground, throwing it to the trash bin.

She threw her hands up immediately, ashamedly. "Okay... sorry..." She whimpered. "To make it up to you, we should go out to dinner... Raoul and I have been concocting it together ever since we heard you were coming here, so we'll all be going out tonight."

I smiled at his name, though lost it looking at the ring again, and re-thinking Meg's words... Is he even my husband any longer? I seemed to have almost forgot that, but how could I? We never put anything forth to the marriage, he never slept with me as far as I know, and he may not even be my guardian as far as I know...

"Sounds good," I replied lifelessly.

"Aren't you happy to see Raoul? He's done nothing but talk about you for the past week... Not to mention all that searching he's done to find where you are. I've never seen him more off of his rocker! Even Philippe was all frantic about it, worrying over his brother so much..."

"I'm happy, of course..." I smiled, for once. I tried to cheer myself up, and push all thoughts of Erik in the back of my mind.

"Sweet, so you can call him if you want, and tell him... I'm sure he'd _love_ to hear from you," She laughed to herself, and walked off to the bathroom.

I got my cell phone out of my pocket, and saw that there was two missed calls the duration of the time I've had the cell phone, noticing the vibrate had been turned off as well as the sound. Raoul had called me twice, evidently, not bothering to leave any messages.

I pressed call and shakily put it to my ear, feeling like the world came together for just a few seconds hearing his beautiful voice answer on the other end.

"Oh, my God, Christine!" He said, so loudly and overpoweringly, that I almost had to shrug the phone away from my ear and couldn't help but smile and laugh, leaning down to the bed.

"Hey, Raoul," I said with as much enthusiasm I could offer.

"You're back to us... this is _great_... I thought..."

"He wasn't going to let me go," I finished his sentence thoughtfully, "We can talk about this later, but Meg has offered a dinner, and I'd be glad to accompany you." I said, pushing Erik to the side once more.

"Awesome! This is great... I've missed you _so much_... You have no idea!" He said enthusiastically once more.

"I've missed you a lot, as well," I replied smiling to myself, feeling my cheeks become warmer just knowing the excitement I felt seeing Raoul again after what seemed to have been centuries. "Listen, I'll see you then... I have to unpack, you know... and-"

"See you then, Christine!" He said, sounding like a schoolboy again, and I felt like a little girl again... and it was just how it's always been, of course... how we felt like each other, two cliché lovers in a tragic tale when Raoul plays the hero, and me the doomed heroine. "I love you," He finished. And I felt that I couldn't reply... I couldn't open my mouth. I just tore the phone from my ear, and pressed end, hearing Erik's words right after his in a more desperate tone.

I groaned to myself... now I was hearing voices! How cruel must this world be! Pretty soon I'll be exclaiming Erik's laments to myself, and then who will be the sane compared to the insane...?

Meg, conveniently came out of the bathroom with her hair brushed out and dressed up, grabbing her purse and sat on the bed. "I'm guessing it's a go?" She asked.

"Yeah." I said simply, and lightly, checking myself in the mirror and instantly grabbed my brush and makeup, and tried to look a bit more livelier than I was truly.

Meg grabbed her keys and we walked out together to the parking lot to her Volkswagen Bug, and drove into the city once more.

"So... are you going to get driving lessons or what?" She asked suddenly.

"I already know how to drive, Meg... I just don't have my license." I replied rolling my eyes, knowing that I went through all the classes to get a permit and all, but never getting around to actually got around to getting a license.

"That's odd." She replied, sighing to herself, arriving to a pizza joint on the corner of one of the streets, and Raoul was standing beside his car already there, leaning against it, just as beautiful as he's always been, and his own charm to him by simply standing there.

Something seemed to restrain me from running into his arms, and instead it was quite the opposite. He grabbed hold of me as if I was a life preserver, his arms tightly about my waist and kissing my head over and over.

"God, I've been so scared for you..." He said into my hair, running his fingers through it lovably. I almost had to tear myself away from him to look at him.

"You shouldn't have been," I said warily. "I was fine." I replied.

He looked slightly aghast for a few seconds, his jaw hanging a little lower in disbelief. "What changed from then to now...?"

I sighed and looked to his eyes pleadingly. "I swear... I will tell you later, when we're alone, okay?"

He knew I was promising him something, and I wrapped my arms around him just as he was holding me, and leaned my head onto his chest. "I've missed you, too, Raoul."

It was a little less then the same sensation I felt when having my arms about Erik in this way... I felt safe in Erik's arms... with Raoul there, it was like falling off an edge, pressing buttons where they shouldn't be pressed and swimming in unknown waters and all I could do was hang on with one hand. I swallowed hard and found my way out of his grasp and get out of all those emotions.

We went into the restaurant and ordered the pizza and salad and sat down, chatting amongst ourselves just like old times, though I felt dead. I hardly talked, sitting there, and watching their two faces alight in a conversation I took no part in.

I waited, watching the cooks work amongst themselves to prepare a pizza.

"So... opera, huh? I knew you were always interested and your voice was always suited for it. It just took me slightly off guard." Raoul said asked, suddenly trying to enlighten me

"Oh," I replied, remembering that I was, in fact, studying at a conservatory and I was, in fact, taking classes and voice training for the stage. "Well... he was teaching me opera and all... where I left off before, and got me into this school..."

"Who?" Raoul asked suspiciously, "Your so-called guardian?"

"Yes, I've told you before," I said, my voice already beginning to raise, and I saw the surprised look on both of my friends' faces, and I lowered myself back down, and rested my head onto my hand and sighed. "It's what my father and I have always wanted." I replied coolly, "He was good enough to do that much, Raoul..." I said defensively. Raoul acted strangely then, suspicious and something else...

Jealousy? How could he be jealous...? He's the only one I've ever really wanted, and he should know that after growing up together, falling in love... He knows me like the back of his hand just as I know him, and it's almost as if we're made to be together in the start.

That would be all too awkward for him to fall out of love because my teacher was Erik... and for him to be jealous of Erik... Well... It makes all the more sense because Erik was jealous of Raoul. This was too confusing! Everything seemed to spin... how could this happen? How could this have even ended up as such?

Was I really so torn up with Erik that I could not return Raoul's love either? Raoul's innocent love and adoration compared to Erik's passion... I felt like I could be getting sick.

Meg eventually went away, finding her boyfriend, and went to his table and stayed here, and I looked at Raoul, sipping at the soda.

"I need to tell you something," I said, looking to see that Meg was making out with her boyfriend now, and I had to tear my gaze away, of course. Why can't I be that content?

"And I'll listen," He responded honestly. "Why are you so bothered, Christine...? What has he done to you?"

I shook my head, fighting back tears that were threatening to flow at the sound of his worried and caring voice. I wish I could just show him what I was feeling in broad daylight so I didn't have to put this through words. I swallowed hard again, and seeing my indignation. "Take a deep breath," he said, putting a light hand on my back.

"I told you that he cared for me very much, right?" I asked, and he nodded an angry positive. "Raoul... he let me go because he loves me... he loves me very much and he knew I hated being there, so he let me be here with Meg and you... And Raoul... this ring... is a _wedding _ring... he _married_ me." I said, fingering over it.

He stood in a second of disbelief. "You can't be serious," he said, his jaw dropping. "That's insane. Is that even legal?"

"Whatever is legal or not, it happened, Raoul... And he let me go and I'm not sure..."

"You love him?" he asked, about as lifeless as the grave. I swallowed again. "Not the same way I love you... Raoul... It's a type of pity. Oh, Raoul... you wouldn't understand. His face... oh, he hides his face behind a mask because he looks just _like_ you after you've been dead quite a few years and buried... I don't think the marriage is still intact, though. I can't take off this ring."

He was repulsed and then horror-struck just as I was. "Oh, Christine, what _Hell_... What a monster. How could you pity him?" He asked disbelievingly. And I looked to him with tears beginning to form and glisten my eyes as they fell down my cheek into the soda, and pushed all the food aside. I rested my head into my arms and looked to the table, feeling defeated.

"I shouldn't have told you this." I said into my arms. He grabbed both of them, and lifted my head up with a hand.

"No... I can help you. If he ever comes again."

"He said he wouldn't come again..." I replied, sounding more sorrowful than I expected. "Can we take this outside...? Someone may overhear." I replied, and he shook his head and held my hand firmly as we walked outside, leaving Meg still with her boyfriend. We took it to the sidewalk where there were hardly any cars, and I felt paranoid just by being here, having half the sense that Erik would be here somewhere, watching. But why would he care if he let me go?

"You do love him, though... I can see it written in your eyes..." He said quietly, sounding ashamed himself. I hated seeing him like that. I really did... I grabbed his wrist firmly, and lifted my head up to his level, and raised myself on my toes and pressed my lips to his, hardly feeling any excitement anymore... almost like it died a long time ago and it never should occur again. A hormone of mine, maybe... maybe there's no more thrill in kissing the one I always thought I'd love, and do love still... and I was just so _confused_!

"If I didn't love you as well, why should I give you that? Why should I deliver just as much affection and care as you show me? Raoul... you can't help me, nobody can. I don't know what I'm doing... all I can do is sit back and wait... I just needed to tell you..."

He shook his head, still looking at my eyes, over and over, and then wrapped his arms around me, going low on my waist so I couldn't bend out of it. "I get it, Christine... you needed to tell me, right? No matter what happens... I'll always be there. No matter what you may go through, and whatever you feel for him... for _Erik_... I'll still be there thick or thin. I just don't know if I could have you leave me... I don't know what I will do without you."

"I'm not leaving you... ever. I can't..." I whispered into his chest. "I don't want to."

"I'll never let anything harm you..." He whispered into my ear, kissing my hair over and over, rocking me back and forth as I cried into his chest. His words meant nothing for he wasn't strong enough despite, but it was nice to think so. It was nice to think this never happened, either... but it has. And I don't know what to do.

For right now... I can be on stage and be who I want to be and forget this love affair, and sing it out on stage. I'll be what Erik and my father want me to be, and what I've dreamed of, for nothing can get in my way... he said I was strong. So, I'll be strong. I just need to get through this night alone...


	22. Thoughts of Pride and Triumph

**I'm very sorry for the later update as well... and I apologize if my writing is slowly going downhill, for I don't know how else to put it, for this part is rather bleak if I do say so myself. Not to worry... the action will be coming soon enough, slowly but surely, and I believe it will astonish. Not to be vague or anything... but you will find it surprising, I hope...**

**Enjoy and review, please! **

**With love,****  
~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Chapter 22:_

_Thoughts of Pride and Triumph_

"Good morning!" Exclaimed Meg, opening the curtains wide, and letting the too-bright light shine in through the window of the small room, after a long night of hardly sleeping at all. I groaned obnoxiously, and covered my head with the blanket sleepily.

"Not now, Er- Meg..." I groaned to myself once more, harshly reminding myself Erik would not be there when I awoke anymore. I had a dream about him again... I just didn't remember exactly what it was, and I didn't wake up to my heart thumping wildly in my chest of fear... it must have been something nice, I suppose.

"Nice, Christine," She sighed and I could tell she rolled her eyes by her tone. I forgot how much I should get used to sharing a room again... Meg just happens to be the worst choice, no matter how much I love her, she seems to always be there too early, and always smiling when life isn't that great, and it annoyed me just like a little sister might annoy her elder one, but that's the type of friendship we had—family. My _only_ family.

Anyway, I got out of the bed, and went with my usual morning routine following after Meg, taking a shower and then trying to manage my hair into a low ponytail at the back of my neck, though it was always messy with the curls despite what happens. Meg happened to pull me aside to the large mirror, and grabbed my hair with both hands and somehow twisted it with her hands, and put in a few pins and clasps, and I had a bun on the top of my hand with an elegant comb already placed inside.

"You should look decent for your first day... you know, to impress. It _is_ opera, you know..."

"Thanks," I said, and gave a small smile, grabbing a bag and rushing together the things I might need for the stage presence course, putting it all together and then wandered out to the corridors, and eventually found my way out of the dormitories to the school area.

After asking a few people, I found myself at one of the hundreds of studios in the building, with a class already in session. I blushed and walked in, handing the teacher the schedule and he nodded, as I went in to place my bag down and stand next to the group.

The class was nice, at least, and I learned a few more things that I didn't already know from being in amateur plays and musicals. I suppose it was the same for opera, for I once heard Erik comment on the opera we saw together that the leading soprano didn't have good enough stage presence... I wanted to be perfect, therefore this class was necessary. Oh, look at me! I'm thinking of Erik again... this entire school will remind me of Erik because he's _everything_ music and the arts... I really need to get away from these thoughts.

I eventually came upon the voice lesson I would be receiving an hour or so after lunch with one of the greatest teachers in the nation, evidently, and she worked with me on my voice, and I was slightly nervous. She was astounded, to be certain for after I sang her jaw was opened and looking at me with reverence, and then went forth building onto my repertoire of music with more challenging music, letting me move instead of standing there and singing, with a professional pianist on the other side of the room of mirrors, and performing while singing this came more accustom.

What really caught my attention with this entire lesson is that she had let me know that a nearby opera house was up for auditions, and it would be very wise for me to audition for credit. I kindly told her that I wasn't ready, but she gave me the papers anyway for me to look over and decided eventually. The rest of the day was spent wandering the grounds with Meg as she talked about the latest scandal in the ballet studio, and the gay guy who was in her class that was evidently very cute. I blocked it out mostly, feeling rude, but I honestly didn't care to hear it, even though I giggled when she did, and smiled and nodded or shook my head whenever I should of. Inside... I had nothing. I didn't feel playful, and I felt the mask growing on me with every hour that passes by becoming thicker and thicker as it slowly ate myself whole so that she hardly knew me anymore.

By the end of the day, I was dead. I could not longer even force a smile as I made myself a meal with the provided microwave, and sat on the couch, eating it while drinking diet coke, feeling normal for at least ten minutes.

The days went on as so, to be exact, and on the weekends Meg and I would take a trip out of town to nearby beach and walk along the water sharing memories, and being ourselves, and then go to the mall and she would buy things she never really needed as always, but it was nice to catch up with her, after keeping so much from her that I could never share.

I told Meg about the auditions, and she looked at me as if I was speaking another language. "Not ready?" She asked exaggerated disbelief filling her tone. "Christine, you would have dove right into that offer headfirst by demanding details if it was something else. Why the change?"

"I don't know..." I shrugged. "It had only been a day here, would be a start of the reasons."

"She obviously thinks you have a gift, and I wouldn't be surprised. The partial knowledge I have of opera, you are probably the best singer I've heard in a long time."

The reason I didn't want to audition so quickly was because I needed to be perfect thoroughly so I could impress. I could hear Erik nagging every time I went in for lessons with the other teacher, and hear his voice telling me it's all wrong and to sing it as if I was part of the story and in the said situation... I believe that's what got me by so quickly.

I didn't see Raoul for a while but when we came to visit we would normally sit on the couch and eat popcorn, and he didn't seem to mind when I told him I needed a little more space, being not-so-sure all the time about our relationship. If anyone or anything convinced me about the auditions, it was Raoul.

He went into a brief reminiscence about my father, him, and I together once more, being at the theater together most of the time, because my father usually played in the orchestra pit in the plays and musicals that I took part in. And then gave reassuring words about myself and my defying confidence that I tell myself I never had. His words were the most convincing I've heard so far... that I lacked the pride within me and that if I wanted to be a star I should fight for it. How I loved hearing his voice tell me these things more than anything else, but I also heard Erik's once more in my head, telling me how the world would be at my feet...

So I went with it.

The next lesson we worked on my audition piece, with the pianist and I listened more intently than ever, but her lessons never seemed to match up to the lessons I had before. It was good enough, I suppose, after all, I could never be perfect no matter how hard I tried.

The auditions were a week after that date at the opera house I think I went to before near the harbor. It was small and basically a town thing, but it was experience, was it not? I felt like I was being watched the entire week, glancing behind me, and then checking every empty room that I walk into twice before actually stepping foot inside. Maybe Erik didn't leave me. I felt myself cringe slightly at the thought of him stalking me, which shouldn't be so surprising, but I still despised the thought. He couldn't just knock on my door to begin with and ask for company, anyway... Stalking was his only vice.

The week of classes, though, went by dreadfully quick. I took all the advice I received and soaked it up like a sponge, and every time I woke up in the morning, I felt my heart speed knowing that the date was coming quicker than imagined.

When the day did come, I was a wreck. I didn't eat anything for breakfast, feeling slightly over-exhausted to even think of eating something, when my stomach growled in protest. I wore a dress, pinning my hair up the way Meg had before, and applying enough makeup that it wasn't too much. I tried to make myself not as pale, for I had been denied a summer in the sun, therefore I could not get the least bit tan, so my paleness had been added up over those months.

I left, stopping at a cafe along the way and purchasing something to eat while I waited, though it wasn't the brightest idea and chugged down water to get the food out of my throat. I warmed myself up by humming a few scales, and eventually singing as I stood in the hallway after signing up, along with many other people who had their own ego and vast pride. One caught my eye particularly, recognizing her troubled voice and stern outlook. She was nagging at her partner to back off, and then through a few things at him until he was gone.

"_You'll be fine_." I couldn't tell if it was Erik's voice in my head or if he was there, watching me. I seemed to crumble before the realization that he was most likely there to support me, I guess. It was nice for I did want to speak with him again oddly enough, not sure of what I could have said. I didn't reply to the voice in front of people, in fear it may look that I was speaking to myself, so I moved away from the cluster of women, all singing to themselves.

"Erik?" I asked thin air, looking at the walls, and back to the people. He didn't answer for a while. "Where are you?"

"_With you_." He answered simply, and I felt a chill go down my spine because it was so long since I heard his voice speak again... I was reminded of the angelic voice all over again, how it swept me off of my feet every time.

"Am I talking to myself or is it really you?" I asked, grimacing.

"_I'm right here, Christine, you cannot see me._" His voice seemed to come from the walls, as if it floated out of them. "Go. You'll be called soon." Now, his voice was nearer, seeming to be _right_ next to me, although when I turned around I saw nothing but thin air. I followed that order, and walked to where the line of women headed, to the backstage part of the theater.

My heart never ceased to stop racing, and my palms became sweaty as I looked over the music over and over again, humming to myself and singing more scales until I heard my name being called onto stage.

I awkwardly walked onto stage, the bright spotlight stunning, and I had to narrow my eyes to see if there was anyone sitting out in the dark audience.

"Name?" A man asked mechanically.

"Christine Daae, sir." I replied, stuttering over words.

"And what shall you be singing for us today, Miss Daae?" He asked a little more kindly yet tiredly.

"The Jewel Song from _Faust._" I replied unsteadily.

"Very well. You may begin any time."

I swallowed hard and take in a few deep breaths, and looked over to the pianist to nod to begin. I opened my mouth and began to sing, using all that I know to make it perfect and soulful. I think I wasn't the best I've ever been, considering my nerve. I felt like I lost myself on the stage, getting into the music, and realizing when it was over, I looked to the audience again, and waited.

He sounded startled when he began speaking... "Very good, Miss Daae... You'll be notified within a week." He said hurriedly, and then signaled for the next person as I walked off stage, being handed music who nodded to me acknowledgedly

I felt my cell phone ring in my purse and my hand immediately unzipped it to take it out, resting the music against with my chest, and held the speaker up to my ear, not bothering to see who it was.

"Hello?" I asked, feeling myself smile with the reaction of my audition, and sighed to myself contentedly.

"Christine," My name was heard from the familiar voice that I've grown so much to adore.

"Erik?" I asked quietly, going to a neglected part of the theater where someone may not be watching. I sighed to myself, feeling slightly relieved at the sound of his voice, and then questionable.

"It is I, yes... you did very well, Christine. I'm very sure you'll get the part." He said fondly, sounding slightly weaker on the other end which worried me.

"You sound.. weaker," I noted aloud, furrowing my brow. "Are you alright?"

"You must not worry of me... Just know... that I'm watching, and I'll be perfectly fine."

I blinked several times, and then became confused, "But you said that-"

"I know what I said... I cannot leave you..." It sounded suffocated on the other end and my heart quickened at the memory of finding him on the floor, rasping for breath that one night.

"Erik..." I murmured, my voice raising.

"Goodbye, Christine." He hung up, and I stood there, with the phone still in my ear in disbelief... I began to debate whether or not I should go back to him this quickly, but he told me to not worry... and I tried not to, but I always found myself wondering off to what could possibly happen to him.

What if he was dying? What if that's the reason that he let me go was because he was dying? I felt tears beginning to prick my eyes, and I immediately wiped them away, deciding that wasn't a good thought. He would let me know if he was dying this way... wouldn't he? He wouldn't want me to overly worry because he knows I care... right?

My cell phone rang again and this time I looked at the caller ID which was Meg.

"How did you do!?" She sang loudly, so that I had to pull the phone from my ear as I drove, putting it on speaker.

"Awesome!" I replied with fake enthusiasm so that questions wouldn't emerge. Hearing my awkwardness, Meg became very awkward herself.

"Oh... well, that's great, Chris... When will you be notified?"

"Next week... I'll talk to you when I get back to the dorm, okay?" I muttered, losing enthusiasm quickly.

"Alright," was all I needed to hang up. I stopped at a red light, and felt my eyes already beginning to water and outpour over my cheeks, dripping down to my hands. I had to wipe them away consistently, and when I parked I stayed in the car and sobbed quietly, feeling myself crumble slowly. How could I have left him when he needed me all this time and now I'm just realizing the cold hard truth that I _needed_ him as well..

Raoul would live with me gone, and Meg would as well... But Erik... Erik was _dying, _and if there's anything that would cause me so much pain would be for him to be gone forever after becoming so much apart of my life... that we were friends, very good friends who fought often but loved each other... and he wanted me to love him more than anything... Oh... I never should have left him... I never should have opened that door unless he had to pry me out.

All I could think was that I had to see him again... just once more... I picked up my cell phone, and dialed his number but he didn't answer. My heart dropped into my stomach, instantly worrying that maybe he was having another attack and he needed someone... Or maybe he just didn't answer because he thought I'd be fine without him right now... that was probably not what happened.

I got out of the car and walked back to the dormitories on unsteady legs, making sure the flush of my cheeks was back again and not so red-looking, though my eyes were still puffy, I tried to not let anyone see me as I walked in.

I handed Meg the keys and laid onto my bed, looking up to the ceiling, pressing my lips shut to the questions that were asked, and fell asleep.

______

A week later, I found out that I made the cut... I was going to be the understudy to the leading role which that alone sent me to tears just by finding out. What more could I have asked for? They all said it was a pretty large role for someone who had just got into the business. I didn't hear from Erik for the entire week and my worries only grew more constant. I found myself just ignoring people around me, and thinking through things that were unknown to the other people

Rehearsals started soon and they were possibly the most demanding thing I've ever been through besides Erik's teaching. I had something called "pleasure" in her own terms watching Carlotta Giudicelli for most of the rehearsals. I honestly hated watching her be in the spotlight over and over and I never happened to receive any sort of attention most of the time, and when she was off on break during the many, I would have the chance to sing. Don't get me wrong... but I swear I held the attention of a few more onlookers than what Carlotta had done on stage during rehearsals... The more I listened to her sing, the more I felt like someone should get one of those hooked rods and choke her off the stage. I give a bleak "ha ha" for my dark humor, but it was probably true that someone might just do so... and I couldn't even think the name of which onlooker may.

I watched her and learned from her mistakes, for she had no stage presence, staying in the same place during an entire aria, and sounded like a screeching cat once put on the spot. I, for sake of my position, kept my mouth shut every time she would come to me and joke about my singing, saying that I would have no room to be on stage most of the time, and gave me "professional" advice on how to go on. She didn't know who was watching, and she doesn't know who she was dealing with. I thought that to myself... hopefully he was out there. I felt a bleak feeling of pity for Carlotta, for she sounded like a cow and her father forced her into it when she started in her home country in Italy.

There was about one month of non-stop rehearsals, demanding every minor and major roles' attention for every little detail, and the sum of it seemed to take my breath away (except for Carlotta, of course... but I dare not say much more).

The opening performance was another month from then, and days went on as time goes by... and before I knew it.. the opening night was the following day.

There were rumors going about... I don't know how true they might be, but they said Carlotta was falling freakishly ill just before the final dress rehearsal. What luck I may have had... but I'm not _that_ lucky... She wasn't ill, I know that. She could have been convinced to back down and persuaded by the most lush voice I've ever heard, and now she has the taste of being put down by the unseen. I would feel sorry for her, falling under Erik's spell... except that wasn't what happened.

I was called into the office on the morning of the opening day, and a very exhausted-looking manager awaited me on the desk, clutching a piece of paper in his hand firmly, he heaved in a deep sigh, and looked up to me with sleepless eyes, and sighed again.

"You will be playing _Violetta _tonight, Miss Daae." He said briskly, and alotted enough time for my to take it in. I furrowed my brow, backing away slowly.

Taking in a slow, and unsteady breath, I cocked my head to the side, "Why is that, sir?" I asked quietly, letting it sink in, pressing my lips firmly together.

"Carlotta had fallen ill, strangely enough... But I trust you will impress all the same... at least that is what I have heard."

I blinked at him, and looked to the paper in his hands. "Who is that from, sir?"

"If I had told you, you would think me insane. That question best not be answered. You are dismissed to rest for tonight, Miss Daae... for it will be very long."

"Yes, sir." I replied, and swiftly walked out of the office, feeling my arms tremble and my legs take out from under me. It was Erik's fault, of course... As it often was. I couldn't deny it, and I can't go against it, for there is no one else to fill the role except for me... And I'd do anything to make him proud.


	23. Unpleasant Surprise

**Whoosh... Wow... I had to perfect this chapter before I leave on vacation tomorrow. We won't be arriving at out destination until sunday so be expecting an update then whilst I write in my car on the way there. *Hopefully* the campground has internet! If it doesn't I wouldn't be updating until the next Saturday or sunday and if that campground doesn't have internet then I won't be updating for about two weeks, and if that does happen, then I shall have quite a few chapters ready for eyes to read. I'm dreadfully sorry to leave you on such an edge, but it's what's to happen.**

Please, please, please review. If you don't, then... I don't know... but it'd be awesome if you did and tell me your thoughts... no lovey dovey stuff here... Ha ha... not in my stories, heck no!

~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 23:  
Unpleasant Surprise_

Raoul drove me to the theater about two hours before the show began to keep me company, since Meg was busy. He left for a while when we went over a few things since I_ was_ the understudy, and I tried to keep my mind busy on the upcoming show while he was gone. He showed up when someone was doing my makeup and all, and came up from behind me with a rose and dazzling smile.

"You're going to be awesome out there, I know it." He confided holding my hand as the girl went through my hair again, and I smiled up to him, pressing my nerves down on his hand, and he didn't seem to care.

"Shouldn't you be with your brother?" I asked curiously, "Isn't he coming?"

"He can wait," He assured me, and gave another smile. I sniffed a laugh, knowing he was desperate for my attention again when he offered to take me here today.

I hopped off the chair when she was finished, looking at my lavish costume in the mirror, with my hair pinned up and makeup all finished off.

"If I do say so myself... you look absolutely stunning, Christine." He said placing both hands on my shoulders, and looking over them. "This is your dream... and you're going at it right now... How great is that?" He said fondly.

My heart picked up a little speed, and I felt my cheeks redden more than they already were. "It's quite amazing..." I said to myself in the mirror, "And I wouldn't be here if it weren't for..." I paused, and held my breath, thinking that mentioning the name I was going to would be a bad idea.

Raoul let it go, seeming determined to keep my mind off of _that_ part of the performance, looking down to my hand and held it firmly.

"I could kiss you right now... if it weren't for the stage makeup... I don't want to ruin it..." He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it, and I felt my stomach drop a little, feeling less flustered when he kissed me, and a little emptier. I smiled to him again, hoping just that little thing would be enough for him.

The time passed by too quickly when all the performers were called to the wings for one last briefing with the director, and then it was the show time. I hugged Raoul goodbye, and let him go find his box seats with Philippe, and it was when he left me that it all hit me at once... I was about to perform in front of hundreds of people... My stomach held all the butterflies it could have ever held and my knees wobbled from under me, feeling my palms begin to sweat.

The only thing that I could think of that would be able to soothe me in any way would have to be Erik's voice telling me about sweeping crowds off their feet, and making angels weep... and in his voice only would I possibly be comforted enough that there was practically no nerve. Thinking of it helped a little, but there was still a few more butterflies in my stomach, which quite possibly made my entire performance slightly better than ever before.

After the announcement that an understudy would be in the place of Carlotta on opening night, I heard an agitated grumble throughout the entire audience which made my heart begin to sink with slight fear that they wouldn't listen at all.

Out of all my attempts of giving my soul to music, this was possibly the best time I ever had. I went on stage on my cue and found myself so enveloped in the music, singing each lingering note and meaning it as if it could have been my own story...

And what I received in turn was the most heart-compelling feeling I've ever known. The _entire_ audience was on their feet and an enormous round of applause was all I could hear as I made my way off the stage before intermission into the next act. I wasn't even _finished_ yet, and they were already _that_ intuitive of my performance? A confidence that I've never had before was brought to me from receiving that acknowledgment that they were _actually_ listening to_ me_! I silently thanked God as I stepped off stage, feeling that I was in my own heaven at the moment.

The rest of the show seemed to go by in a blur for I felt lifeless when I wasn't singing, and when I opened my mouth up again, I would feel that the entire world I could run through without having a backward glance.

It was remarkable... The curtain call, at least, I felt as pale as a ghost from being so worn out, but the loud claps from the audience seemed to enthuse me like my own sort of caffeine. There were roses thrown onto stage from the front once I stepped onto the stage, and I bowed, and went forth to grab a few and thanked them, and went back to bow once more with the cast, and the curtain would fall, and it was finished.

I could have simply fainted right there, giving one of the roses to one of the ballet girls, and they walked out with it happily. I rushed to my dressing room before the people started asking questions and asking how I felt for I didn't have the strength to go through with it the entire night.

There was a knock on my door and I mechanically answered for them to come in, and Raoul showed up with an even larger bouquet of flowers and I blushed, wiping my face off of the makeup.

"You've got to be kidding me..." I smiled, taking it from his hand, and sniffing them, which were very sweet.

"From Philippe _and_ I!" He exclaimed playfully, sitting on the couch across from me, looking at all the flowers I happened to gather up, and then stared at something on the vanity particularly.

"Well, that's odd..." He said, staring pointedly at whatever it was, and then I looked to where he was looking and furrowed my brow. A _single_ rose that I happened to not even remember gathering was on my vanity desk, and I picked it up curiously, looking at the black ribbon tied about the stem. There was also a note attached and I shakily picked it up, knowing Raoul's gaze was on my back, staring intently.

It read something simple in the familiar red scrawl, _Utter perfection on stage. As I told you. With as much adoration, Erik.  
_  
I looked at the note for more than I should of for Raoul became uncomfortable.

"Who's it from?" He asked in a concerning tone.

"A friend," I replied and tucked the note into my back pocket, and putting the rose down. I looked to him sitting there comfortably and felt bad for doing what I was about to. "Shoo, I must get dressed." I said, waving him off.

Without any reluctance he left the room, to myself. I dressed quickly out of my costume and gathered all my things together and walked out to Raoul who accompanied me down the hall, arm-in-arm to all the people waiting for answers.

"How did you manage to get the leading role, miss?" One of them asked, and I ignored him, walking by, hearing questions like "Who's your teacher?" or "Have you ever thought of not being the understudy?"

One question specifically I heard from someone, as I walked along, who was very shady to begin with, he managed to pull my shoulder aside and ask, "Did you hear, Miss Daae, that Carlotta was poisoned?"

I shrugged out of his grasp agitatedly, and began to hurry away, looking back to the shady man with Raoul, feeling my stomach drop looking at Raoul who was surprised as well.

"_Poisoned_?" I asked up to him, though I was really thinking to myself.

"She was _poisoned_ in order for me to go on... Raoul... this is terrible." I said, massaging my temples. "I can't believe him..."

"Who?"

"Why... Erik... he poisoned her of course so she couldn't sing. She wasn't 'ill!'" I exclaimed a little melodramatically but he seemed to have finally gotten my point.

"I thought he left..." He whispered incredulously.

"No... He won't leave..." I replied, shaking my head. "I mean... what reason does he have to leave?" I asked to myself.

"See the way you tremble when you speak of him, Christine? I thought he left a long time ago, no need to get flustered about it." He huffed.

I let go of his hand and looked at him dumbly, then sighed...

"Look, the point is... what he did was wrong..." I said, furrowing my brow as I looked out the window.

"And this makes a different out of all the other things he's done for and to you, how?" He was being sarcastic now and I slapped his hand now.

"You don't understand..."

"I think I understand very well. He's _obsessed_ and _insane_... Christine, I don't see how you love him in any way."

"You're just jealous." I huffed snidely.

"_Jealous_!? _Over what, must I ask_?!" He looked at me with wide eyes, and I could tell I was making him mad by even bringing up the subject again. I remained silent having no answer to that, and cast my gaze down to my hands, tying them together over and over, feeling very stupid again.

"I'm sorry..." He said quietly, fixing his eyes on the road once more. Oh, how I hated those two words right now for they make no sense at _all_._ "_I didn't mean to yell at you..."

I rolled my eyes and leaned against my hand on the arm rest waiting for the dorms to appear along the road of the city just so I didn't have to debate with him any longer. I believe that had to have been our first fight ever... How strange. I believed I loved Erik of whom I fought with all the time, and I lov_ed_ Raoul, believing he was always my savior and yet we never fought.

"Could you say something?" Erik always asked me that, too... oh, I should really stop that around Raoul...

"I don't have anything _to_ say," I whimpered, "I'm just... I don't know... I need to sleep."

He sighed and the car stopped, leaning to kiss me on the cheek but I slid away enough that he only had my hand to press his lips upon.

"I love you." He said, and I pressed my lips firmly together, stepping out of the car, and slamming the door.

I walked into the lobby which was deserted for it was almost midnight, relieved because I no longer would like to see people at all tonight and maybe even tomorrow. If I saw another questioning person I'd probably _have_ to slap them.

I walked up to my room and saw Meg laid out on the couch with an empty popcorn bowl beside her and the ending of some horror movie laying on the floor, the phone next to her, which I picked up as well as the bowl, and placed on the counter.

It read on the screen of the phone "one missed call" and I looked at the number curiously, seeing that it was the familiar number of Meg's mother. She probably wanted Meg or maybe even myself, but I haven't even spoken to her in such a long time.

I put the phone aside and went to my bed and didn't even bother to change out of my sweat pants and t-shirt once more, and fell into a dreamless sleep almost instantly.

"Meg, your mom called last night." I noted whilst pouring myself a bowl of cereal and getting milk out of the fridge. She nodded her head and went for the phone, and dialing her number. I couldn't help but listen in to the conversation that she was putting up with her mother and quite instantly she turned to me and handed the phone to me.

"She wants to speak with you." She said and I mouthed "why" except she shrugged and I answered.

"Hello, Mrs. Giry." I said mechanically.

"Hello, Christine." She answered quickly, "You've managed to leave your so-called guardian, I trust? Did he finally tell you, then?"

My heart sunk when she mentioned that, and it began to flutter worriedly at what she may bring up. "I'm sorry... I don't think I understand... What do you mean that he is 'so-called' and what was he supposed to tell me?"

It was too long of a pause between her answer and my question, that I felt faint and flustered at the same time, worrying over what she may say still.

"I don't think... I should tell you then." She stuttered breathlessly. "How did he let you go?"

"He said to be here, Mrs. Giry... And I'm here and... he wanted me to go..." I gasped, pondering that if these theories were possibly true, and when they managed to be... I felt emptied of pretty much everything at the moment, and I had to restrain my heart. "Tell me..." I breathed.

"I'll leave it to him." She said simply and it was that tone she always used with me when I hopped in and demanded to be brought to another family.

"If he never _told_ me then what makes you think that he will now!" I shouted at the phone angrily.

There was another pause, and for a brief and scary moment I thought she had hung up. "He's not your guardian, Christine. You were supposed to go to the foster home a long time ago for you were truly not under the system any longer," She gasped, sounding very upset, "I'm very sorry..."

I glared to myself, and felt my tears begin to pour onto my cheeks... I was _deceived_ in the most _extreme _way I could have ever dreamed of. He only wanted to make me believe that he was marrying me just so it wouldn't give me any hope... so that he would make me think that I was ultimately his and his only... To make me _think_ this much! That I had no other place to go... That I'd never have anything to do as an orphan and he made me hurt when I should have never been hurt. I began to sob angrily, and hung up on Mrs. Giry, and began to stomp to my bed and scream into the pillow. _None_ of this should have happened... None of it! I should have never gotten to know the most hurtful man I have ever known... and make me feel things I should have never felt for him...

He basically _kidnapped _me!

How could he...? I sobbed once more, feeling my chest begin to ache, and everything ached... How _could _he? I asked myself over and over again. Meg came over, obviously confused and I couldn't tell her because it was... so _wrong..._"What's wrong?" she asked worriedly.

I didn't answer, hiding my face into my pillow.

"Christine...! Chris...! Come on... can you not answer?" She begged at me and shook my shoulder and I didn't move. I honestly didn't know what to do next... After all... what would _you _do is suddenly you realize the time you spent with someone who you thought you fell in love with someone and in that time deprived of the world was really all just a lie...? That it was built up of lies from head to foot... that he really had no right keeping me there and making me do things I never in a million years would have done...

So this is my life, huh?

I keep something in my heart, paying enough homage to last for years... practically giving my heart through music, and it's all false... Oh... _Oh_ how I _hated_ Erik right now! How I hated him so much! I mean... what more could you ask from a man who hides his face behind a mask?

Surely God hates me for doing something... surely this must be _pay back_ for being such a jerk beforehand and for hating life as much as I am hating it right now.

It made all the sense to end life right now... I just couldn't. The knife was _right_ there... there were pill bottles in the cabinet, there were plenty of things that I could simply do and wait for death to come and take me to peace finally. The window was opened... there was a long way down... I'd land all bloody and messy on the pavement, you know... I _could_. I laughed hysterically to myself, and then faltered slightly, hearing Erik and Raoul's voice in my head, and I screamed to drown them out. I probably looked like a madwoman... There was just an invisible wall that torn me from killing myself, so that I couldn't move... that forced life into me... I'd go to hell after being such a faithful Christian.. how wrong was that? How wrong was _life_?

Meg seemed to wake me up from this phase... she splashed cold water over my face as I lay on the couch, breathless and emotionally exhausted.

"Sorry," She apologized, and it seemed a bit comical so I had to give a bleak laugh. Ha ha... I was _wet_!

"That doesn't help, does it? I don't think I should slap you, though... isn't that wrong...?" She was talking to herself as well, but that seemed to be the usual for her to begin with. I was back to my senses, at least... I wonder if this is how Erik feels...? _Oh God_!! I'm turning _into _Erik! Before you know it I'll be screaming to myself and then... and then it'll all go downhill from there. I'll begin to look literally dead, and look all twisted and stuff... and then I'll be kidnapping people just to make them love me!

Ew.

I slapped my own self to get me out of that train of thought and rose from the couch, feeling... dreadful. Well, Christine... what do you do now? I needed to get out of here to begin with... I probably won't be able to perform again once Carlotta feels better and the poison is out of her system. She'll probably be so pissed at me that she'd take over my stage.

I could call Raoul... Yeah... I'll call Raoul. He makes my life go round, right? I almost ran to my cell phone and plopped myself back onto my bed, my pillow still wet from crying into endlessly.

"Hello?" His voice answered.

"Can you come over here?" I asked imploringly.

"Um..." He stuttered, sounding confused and I sighed.

"Okay, then you _have_ to come over here! I need you..." I replied.

"Sure." He replied, stuttering.

"Meet me in the lobby." I replied, and began to pack up a few things... I needed to leave for a little while... at least until I am able to drag myself back again... And I knew the perfect place to be.

"Where are _you _going?" Meg pulled me aside and asked, beginning to worry.

"Somewhere besides here," I replied, and looked back apologetically to her, furrowing my brow and wrapped my arms around her, trying hard not to cry again.

"Ugh... Chris! You can't leave me again! Don't go back there!"

I laughed strangely, "There's no way in _hell _I'm going back to that man. I'll be with Raoul for a while... don't worry, I'll come back hopefully." I frowned.

She grunted..."Then what do I tell everyone else...? That you suddenly decided to take leave from the conservatory."

I shrugged, "Yeah, something like that. Tell them as many lies as you want! They probably have a few to tell you!" I walked out then before any more questions were asked.

"Call me!" She shouted through the door as I slammed it shut and walked away.


	24. Hunted

**Ha ha!! 10 hours on the road, nothing to do except listen to my iPod and write on the long way and I happened to be very good at it, as well for it was very exciting writing this much, and I think my heart started thudding harshly against my chest. Yay for sketchy campgrounds along the way that happen to have internet! Hopefully the next campground we will be in will... I hope you'll enjopy this much and I may have the next chapter up tomorrow night... or the next two depending on how long the ride is.**

**Read and Review!  
Love to you all!  
~The Phantom's Flutist~**_

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_Chapter 24:_

_Hunted_

I met Raoul in the lobby just as I said I would and came to him with open arms, hoping he would take me in.

"I'm so sorry, Raoul..." I whispered into his chest.

"What's wrong?" He asked, rubbing my back, pressing me against him and kissing my hair.

"He's not my guardian, Raoul... he never was." I sobbed, feeling slightly relieved to be with him, but not everything was entirely solved, leaving me at a dull end. Everything seemed to be in a blur as I turned my head to the side. "I need to get out of here and leave for just a little while and I was wondering if you could help me." I said slowly and unsteadily.

"Of course I'll help you," He assured me warmly, rubbing my back and patting my head, and everything was fine for at least a little while.

"I need somewhere to go..." I hinted quietly, "A hotel room or something."

"You can come to my place, stay there for a while, you know... We have many guest bedrooms. You've stayed there before, anyway... it'll be like old times." He pulled me aside and smiled down to me, his blue eyes sparkling, filled with dim understanding, but hope that I'd warm up to him more than Erik, and I complied a little too gladly.

"I don't know..." I said sadly. "I suppose it'd be okay."

"It will be fine..."

"I may get a call to be back at the theater... I hope you wouldn't mind then."

"I'll do anything you need me to." He said assuringly. "I love you... I wish you could find a way out of this and I'll be more than happy to do anything, you know that... I've always done that when I could. If this is what you need, then may it be."

A tear fell again and he managed to wipe it off with his finger, still smiling like his boyish self, and still there through thick and thin and that's why I've always loved him... I don't think that will ever in a million years pass.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and we walked out of the lobby together, "I trust that those are your things that you need." He hastened and I nodded and we walked to the parking lot where his familiar car awaited, and I hopped into the seat next to him... knowing that the last time we went through this whole escape matter Erik caught us before we were near his home, and dragged me away, and I was slightly frightened that would happen again, so I was tense the entire ride.

His house was a breezy one, with an ocean view and on a cliff... there was an entire section of his backyard pertaining to a usually unsuccessful garden, but it was nice just the same with a few dogs that were outside and tended to greet people on the way in from their cars which were parked in a large garage. It was all white paneled with many windows as was the usual New England style, and a large window in the center showcasing a chandelier above the front door that gave a glimpse of the upper balcony. It was a mansion to me when I was a little girl and went with Raoul to spend weekends sailing on the Chesapeake Bay, or canoing and we would swim in the small bit of water that was allotted for their property. And eventually calm down, grabbing a few chairs and many rocks and skip them along the water. My father usually sent me here to get me out of his hair during the summer, and it was usually beautiful. Now, the house looks smaller and less hopeful.

Philippe greeted us at the front door with a smile that is more business-like than Raoul who would always be a boy until he was eighty, and Philippe would wrinkle prematurely... His mother and father were hardly around, so I hardly knew them, but they were also very business-like and aristocratic. His father looked like he belonged in an office until death and his mother was... hardly anything to speak of with white-blond hair that was always pulled into an ugly bun on the top of her head. I didn't like _them_ very much.

"Hey Philippe," I mentioned dryly passing by him with a family hug, which was always welcomed with both of the brothers.

"She's going to stay here for a while," Raoul said to his brother, who nodded simply, for people, I knew, always seemed to stay here for business matters and it was usually the central of the company which bothered none of the family except for on occasion when the parents were hardly around to make dinner. I felt bad for them when I stayed here... but we were all the same.

He led me to one of the rooms which was decorated with antique-looking furniture and cream-colored French doors that led to an outdoor balcony and had its own bathroom as most rooms here did. I stayed in it before, I think, because I remember I once tried to sleep on the balcony with Raoul who would lean on the bench and we would tell each other stories that we could think up... most were extremely silly and at the top of our heads in the wee hours of the morning, and then others were creative.

"I remember this room," I noted, smiling to him.

He laughed to himself and smiled.

"How could I forget those long nights without sleep?"

I frowned, "But they were the _best _nights without sleep... we didn't have anything better to do in the morning anyway."

"That's probably right." I nodded, still smiling, placing my bag onto the bed and sat on it, leaning back. "Thanks for doing this by the way... I don't know where my life would be without you."

"Probably up the wall..." He mentioned jokingly.

"Yes... but don't worry, you would be a very lonely child if it weren't for me." I said with just as much enthusiasm, feeling more alive than I was four hours ago, and he nodded once more acknowledgedly.

"Are you hungry for lunch? I'll make something for the both of us if you want." He said, putting his hands in his pockets and I nodded, getting up from the bed and following him intently down the stairs. I helped him make a pizza, putting together some dough, sauce, and a bunch of cheese, feeling like a little girl with a little boy all over again and it felt amazing.

I helped him put it in the oven and set the timer for he always never knew how, and we waited, reminiscing all over again. I happened to tell him what it was like being on stage, and he would rush a few more questions about it before getting the pizza out of the oven and we went outside to eat it on the deck.

"You should be my brother, Raoul," I brought up suddenly after a brief moment of silence. "We practically are brother and sister, you know that?"

He seemed to think on it for a second, taking another bite, and I folded my legs up into a criss-cross position, enjoying the sun while I could.

"Maybe," He shrugged. "I intend on marrying you one day, Christine," He said after another thoughtful pause. "Maybe not in the near future but I don't know anyone who I'd rather spend my life with."

It took me by surprise and I almost spat the bite of pizza back onto the plate, but I forced it down my throat and cleared it, "Not in the near future, of course..." I hinted.

"Well... Whenever we are both ready, of course... I don't want to be married so soon... do you?"

"I don't know..." I replied, "I never thought much upon the matter, actually. Not since... well, you know... not since that whole incident which was all basically a lie. If he wasn't my guardian and if I never had one, then it wasn't legal. I don't see why he could lie in the eyes of God."

"As I've said before, he's mad."

"Raoul, I _know_ what you said." I said quickly, feeling a little annoyed at the entire thing.

"I'm sorry... We don't have to go through it again."

"Good," I scoffed, looking out to the ocean and all the sail boats out on the water with the sun shining directly above us. "This is really nice. Just like old times, you know?"

"Yeah, it truly is," He agreed, leaning back on his arms and looking to the sky, and I could depict every perfect line on his body, looking over to him thoughtfully. He was warm and welcoming and Erik was... not warm and not someone I would like to approach on a dark street in fear for my life instead of my money. Probably someone, if I didn't know better, I would throw my purse at him, saying the hell with it, and run until my legs could take it no longer.

"Wasn't your birthday two months ago?" he asked suddenly.

"Sure..." I scoffed, grimacing at the memory of being on the plane for most of the day and becoming apologetic to that lier Erik is.

"And I never brought it up. Mm... We would have to do something about that."

"You don't need to." I said quickly. "I kind of want to forget it ever happened. The only gift you could give me for that reason is the gift of ignoring it and letting me forget."

"Oh, I'm sorry." He replied, thinking on it.

"What happened, anyway?" He asked.

"I don't want to tell you..."

"But you can trust me, can you not?"

"Of course, but Raoul-" I stuttered, feeling like an idiot. He huffed, and looked at me his blue eyes glaring once more, and I had him in a bad mood at not revealing things to him. He stepped closer to me and stood on the same bench as I, wrapping his arms around my shoulders, and I leaned my head against his shoulder, looking out once more, and he rubbed my head.

"I won't tell anyone else. I promise." He said, "I just want to know what happened to my first and only love... Is that too much to ask?"

"No, of course not..." I said slowly, breathing in his different scent, the cologne and things I've been missing for months on end like warm skin to hold me close. "We went to Italy. Evidently, Erik had business and things to take care of and he never was near, giving me some Italian girl named Gianna to escort me throughout Florence. He was mad that I was mad at him so we went home on my birthday, after giving me a gift that I would have refused."

"Isn't that something that you would have never stopped talking about? Like when you went to Florida that one time, I think I finally got you to shut up about it after a year."

I rolled my eyes, and sadly shook my head in the negative. "I don't really care to remember what happened. The man is made of deception from head to foot as much as he's made of death." I felt horrible deep inside for saying such a thing.

"You describe him like it's Satan."

"He made me fall for him one night because of his voice... We didn't _do_ anything, but he made me believe that I was in love with him." That was a lie... I know for certain I definitely did love him in that point of time but I didn't want to upset Raoul in the least bit. Erik would never lead me through that for he was dead-set at the moment for me to never fall for him instantly, but _of course_ I would...

Raoul pressed his lips shut and didn't have anything to say, running his fingers through his hair at the mention of his thought-up competition, and I knew I shouldn't have done that almost instantly.

The rest of the day and into the night was filled with giving each other the company that we both longed for in the longest time, telling each other both fantastical and real-life anecdotes. I described Italy to him and he described me the city of love which is Paris... We fell asleep lying horizontally across my bed, my head on his stomach, listening to the beat of his heart as it lulled me to sleep, his hand caught up in my hair, as we both lingered on a dream of being together on a honeymoon in Europe. I slept peacefully, without any sort of tears, and I was thoroughly comfortable being right here right now as he helped me forget the past few days and think upon the best things and fantasies as I've always been on.

It wasn't such a pleasant awakening, though, I must say. I heard him yelp a startled cry which caused me to rise from the bed, looking around the dark room to see wherever he stood. He was leaning against the balcony with something that shone in the light of the lamp hanging over the bench. I walked over to him, throwing open the French doors, thinking he would have jumped if he wanted to, leaning so far over that it frightened me.

"Raoul!" I cried, and he immediately turned to me and encased me into his arms, looking the opposite direction, and I could feel that he was very nervous.

"He's gone... He's gone! At least, I think so..." He gasped, wrapping me more firmly into his arms, making sure something wasn't anywhere near us.

"What happened?" I asked, yawning, and coming out of his hold, looking into his deep-set blue eyes that glimmered with fear.

"He _mocked_ me... he was _mocking _me! I awoke to use the bathroom and there were two star-like eyes from _that_ tree!" He pointed, and I saw now that he was holding a gun. "It was Erik, I think... I shot at it and it hit something... but I don't believe it was him..."

I was thinking he was becoming mad himself over Erik and soon we both will be rather insane and hearing voices. I walked over to the end of the balcony and looked over it with fear still in my stomach at the very thought that Erik was over here and quite possibly could have killed Raoul if he wasn't too careful. Or maybe Raoul could have killed him if he had a better shot. I took the metal thing that was odd to my touch out of his hands... and saw that there was blood on the grass below and a furry thing laying next to it.

"You killed your dog." I noted dryly. "Actually, that would have to be Philippe's dog... Poor thing." Raoul shook his head and looked over it once more that lay near the tree he pointed to. I tried to portray less fear in my voice than I was feeling.

"He was old," I heard him whimper and began back inside, and I handed the gun to him, feeling outrageously tired instead of worrying over and over again. He placed the gun into the drawer of a desk, and I lay back onto the bed as he came beside me, warm enough to be without covers, and I soon fell asleep, but I knew he wasn't... his eyes were wide open, and his heart began to pound whenever the wind would come though, creaking the crevice of the door. My sleep wasn't that peaceful, but I had to sleep and I just wanted to forget more than anything in the world.

When I awoke, Raoul was still laying there, sleeping above the covers as I did, and I managed to sneak my way off the bed without waking him and went into the bathroom to take a shower, looking back to him who was still laying there looking very distressed, and I felt a pang of guilt making him suffer so, but went on and thought it was his own fault for worrying... Erik wouldn't have killed him with me around if that was him out there. It was distressing knowing that Erik was watching every move I made... But it was to be known that he wasn't about to leave me alone. I just wonder if he knows that I know what he's been hiding, and swallowed hard, looking at my pale complexion in the mirror, my eyes widened.

When I came back into the room, I found him still laying on the bed, though awake, leaning on his hands and smiling to himself.

"Good morning," He greeted.

"What's up with the odd smile...?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"I think I'm insane. Nothing more." He said so strangely that I began to wonder if he actually meant it.

"Why is that?" I asked, stepping closer to him.

"What if that wasn't him out there and I was seeing things?" He asked himself.

"It was possibly him though." I replied assuringly, "Did you hear his voice, Raoul?"

"I thought it was the wind..." He said thoughtfully, looking into the distance dumbly.

"Let's get off the subject, shall we?" I grimaced at the thought of Erik saying horrible things to Raoul last night, I just hoped that if anything he wasn't intending on killing him. It came to me that both men that have been after me would kill each other just to have me. Any ordinary, teenage, hormonal girl would probably have a few heart attacks in utter pleasure, but all I found was fear that the two people I cared for most would go away just like everyone else I've loved.

"How about breakfast?" He asked, suddenly more perkier. I shrugged and we went downstairs.

The day was filled with keeping my mind off of the world... We took the kayaks down to the water, and we took them out to the middle of the cove and around, once we were bored with that, we laid out on the kayaks in the water and looked to the blue sky as the sun was setting, and was basically silent for the rest of the time.

"This is a better time then what you'd have with _him, _right?" He asked suddenly, and I looked over to him on his kayak and huffed angrily.

"Whoops..." He said suddenly, backing away, but I came forth and took the edge of the kayak and dunked him in the water, hearing him cry out before landing in the water, and I laughed at him playfully until I felt my own kayak began to wobble in the water, and before I knew it, I went headfirst into the water without any sort of bathing suit, and the clothes weighing me down.

"Raoul, you suck!" I cried out, screaming with laughter as he was, until he was suddenly silent...I couldn't see him on the other side of his dumped over kayak, so I supposed that he was trying to put it over again, but I didn't see it move. "..._Raoul_?" I asked, beginning to tread water, and swim around looking for him. I knew he could swim... so he couldn't_ possibly _have drowned, could he? I nervously called out his name until I decided to go under, my heart beginning to pound against my chest anxiously as I dove down into the water with my eyes squinted open to hopefully see his white shirt somewhere. I saw that... and something black... I dove down further and saw Raoul who was no longer fighting the water and I grabbed his hand, and with all my strength tried to lift him above the water which was taking us both in slowly, and my air could no longer hold itself in for so long. Something else tugged and pulled at it, but I kicked at it with all the energy I had until it let go.

We eventually came to the surface and Raoul took in a deep breath of air, becoming conscious almost instantly. Both of us looked around the water for the overturned kayaks but found only one which is when we began to try to swim all the way to them. Once we got to them, was when we both began to cough up the water we accidentally swallowed beforehand whilst swimming very quickly to the boat, breathless and tired. We managed to get back onto it, turning it over, but that was all we could do, and laid horizontally across them, taking in as much energy as we could to get back to land in case of whatever that thing was would come back.

"What happened?" I asked breathlessly, coughing up more water, spitting it over the edge. His hand moved over his stomach.

"Something... something grabbed my ankle and began to drag me down..." He scoffed. "I thought I was going to drown..." He shook his head, "I took in some breath before going all the way under, and kicked at the_ thing_ until it would let go... But it never did..." He sighed, taking in more air, and huffed it back out.

I looked out to the water to see the black figure floating anywhere but there was no way I could in the murky water and it was getting so dark. My wet clothes kept pulling me down, my strength degrading quickly as I held onto the kayak.

"We have to get back to shore..." I noted, trying hard to get my legs to kick the water and use it as some sort of motor.

"It's so far..." He sighed.

"We need to get there before the sun goes down, Raoul... it could get worse and the thing could come back... we have to kick!" I rushed, trying to get my legs to move but they couldn't. I was so choked up on fear and worry, that I began to shiver, for the water seemed to turn instantly cold.

"Where's the oars?" He asked dumbly. I looked at him with a brow arched, questioning his sanity.

"The oars sank," I replied dryly.

"Oh!" He gasped, "Of course... it makes sense."

"Those things are made of metal and hard plastic. Raoul, _of course_ they sank." I scoffed, "We need to swim or use this boat..."

"Yes, right," He nodded in agreement.

I felt like I was in a nightmare when the sun started to disappear into the shore's trees, painting the water a frightening and deathly black, where it felt we were lost in the middle of it. Soon enough, we began to kick to where the pier's light shone, as if floating, in the cold blackness.

The water became shallower and the kayak got stuck on rocks periodically, which caused a heart attack for the both of us, but we managed to get the boat off of the many, and get back into the water, though a little further from the shore then.

"I feel like Rose from _Titanic,_" I said as we approached the slimy sand that was stuck in between my toes as I sunk, and I gasped with fear, thinking it could have been a hand in the sand as well.

"Why?" He asked dimly, sounding very tired.

"Because it's freezing, we were floating out in the middle of the Bay, and we could have died..." I sniffed, feeling the same fatigue sweep over me.

"Well, at least I don't make promises and then die..." He sniffed.

I didn't want another debate, I felt like I could pass out right now when we reached the grass of his lawn.

"What do you think it was?" I asked.

"A fish... Or I don't know..." I looked up to him dazedly.

"Fish don't have hands and they don't grab people and pull them under. _Nothing_ in the Bay pulls people under, honestly." I was the only one thinking logically right then.

"Then what do y_ou_ think it may be?" He asked snidely. I though of all the possibilities...an eel, though it didn't electrocute him, a shark but how could he possibly mistake hands for teeth... we were both a little jumbled up but even someone completely out of their mind could depict the difference from hands to teeth... so the only possible thing that would be so...

"Human."


	25. Bliss and Deceit

_Chapter 25:_

_Bliss and Deceit_

Once changed out of the dripping wet clothes, neither of us could possibly sleep, knowing almost automatically that the thing who tried to drown Raoul was quite possibly Erik. In fact, I _knew _it was Erik... I just don't know how definitive I might be on this matter. We held each other, knowing that he was deadly determined on killing Raoul just out of jealousy, I suppose... I couldn't let him go away from me and I wasn't able to open my eyes for the briefest second so he probably thought that I was sleeping, and he let me lay on the bed and left me in the room, and I had my ears open for any sort of sound, and if there was I swore I was going to scream.

I was so tired and so miserable, my hair still soggy and salty-smelling... All I wanted to do was forget for just a little while... why must he always be there to ruin it? Why does he insist on ruining my life after attempting to make it all better?

I slept after the longest time, assured that I would quite possibly be forced to return to him so what does it matter how or when? When he comes for me, what does it matter anymore? I've tried to be strong, but all I find now is emptiness and I'm breaking because the very man who told me to be strong is crippling me, stripping me of my defenses until I'm left for the dogs who wish to eat me alive.

I awoke to feel surprised that I was in the same room I fell asleep in, the day was stormy and not bright at all so we'd have to be cooped up in the house all day. I did my usual morning routine in the bathroom and then went to the phone to call Meg as she wanted me to. I found there were two missed calls; one from Meg (of course) and one from the theater. I grimaced and called Meg back first and then I would worry about going back to the theater. I told her I was perfectly fine which was a lie, that Raoul and I were having a great time, and I am almost back to my usual self. She bought my white lie as she usually did, but funny thing is I only told her of two days ago and the brilliancy of those hours.

Then, I called the theater back, knowing at the tip of my tongue they wanted me back, but I really didn't want to say so immediately. It was the exact thing they wanted, and just as I was about to give my reply, Raoul came into my room, opening his mouth to say something, but saw the phone in my ear. He put a finger up, to signal something that wasn't getting to me straight...

"Could you hold on for just a moment, sir?" I told the manager and he didn't have to answer before I put the phone against my chest.

"Who is that?"

"The theater wants me back as I theorized..."

"But you can't go back!" He said quickly. I furrowed my brow, and looked at him questioningly.

"Just _one_ second..." I said a little too cheerfully.

"Miss!" I heard him exclaim on the other end.

"He'll take you again... Can't you see it?"

"Raoul... You're being paranoid. Erik had nothing to do with the audition of the theater." Lies... how terrible am I? "I'll go," I said into the phone. Besides, even if he is planning all of this along, I might as well end this entire fiasco and reject him totally. After threatening to kill my best friend numerous times, I really don't see how he thinks I will be able to love him... Honestly.

"Okay... well, good! It's really not like you have a choice for we _have_ another soprano," He hinted and I rolled my eyes.

"Very well, sir. I'll be there tomorrow night." I answered before he finished his next statement, obviously a little... annoyed? No, not annoyed for it's kind of a weak term to put it in. Someone must be driving them insane just like the someone who is doing so. He plans on making anyone who crosses his way the same persona as him, doesn't he? Maybe it's all a game... I hung up the phone and put it on my vanity table.

"What if he comes... what are you going to do then?" He asked skeptically.

"I'm going to..." I began, thinking a little of what he would like to hear, "run." I shrugged and then hid my face into my arms, groaning. "Because that would _work_ right?" I hissed unhappily.

"I'll be _right_ there prepared for you to go if there's any hint that he's there." He promised, grabbing my shoulder.

"I can't keep running all my life, though. He'll find me when he wants to find me. It doesn't take too long, for I thoroughly believe he is listening to this conversation _right now_!" I laughed dryly, and I stopped, looking around us just as he did frightfully.

He then grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me closer to his body, and tilted my head up tenderly, rubbing my cheek with his thumb so I had a perfect view of his eyes, and he pressed his lips onto mine very slowly, as if measuring what he'll do next. I went in further, wanting to cherish this moment for all time in case I never see him like this again. Never see him smile again... in case I break... and maybe I should cherish his _life_ in case I never see him _living _ again. How cruel is life, anyway? How cruel can Erik be?

"I could kill him, you know..." Raoul started, "I could honestly do that much."

I laughed dryly in his face, still slightly in a haze after the kiss. "I doubt it." I sighed, "Besides..." I began to feel something squeeze my heart, "He once almost died... and I don't know if he's recovered yet or not... there's some disease..." I said this in such a monotone manner that Raoul looked synonymous to a bowling ball when I looked up to him, struck in awe. If he would have said "that's perfect" I would _have_ to slap his face and make a great show for whoever is watching. Erik might be wronging me all these times... but I still cared greatly if he was going to die... after all the rights he did do for once.

"Don't look so happy, Raoul," I spat at him, upset.

"Do I _look_ happy?" He asked, startled by my outburst.

"There's a fat chance for you ever to not make your emotions noticeable." I glared, crossing my arms, stepping away, "He doesn't deserve death..." I said more to myself though he heard it. "Don't even think about killing him, anyway."

"You just don't want him gone. I know you better than that for you to lie to me."

"_That_ is a lie..." I whispered, shaking my head. "I want him gone, but not dead."

"He deserves what's coming for him."

I groaned, rolling my eyes at him... so it was all coming down to this... "Let's get off the subject."

"You have to leave tomorrow," He pressed sadly.

"Yes, I do have to leave. I'll go back to Peabody like I need to... It's a chance that I'll never get again." I hinted, and then turned away as to not see his blue eyes which always seemed to persuade me one way or the other. I didn't need his hints right now. I can fend for myself for right now until I need him most. "We have all day, Raoul."

"Well... what is there to do? I'm _not_ taking you out there again." He sternly replied and I nodded to myself.

"I know." I laughed dryly, "I'm not going back out there, either."

I think everything we said to each other was almost healed and we resumed the day just like yesterday, going for walks around his property (which his _huge_) and we went by the stables that he just recently bought from a neighbor that lives a few blocks away that holds about three horses. Philippe came along with us for once for he was excused from today at his office for some reason. He smiled brightly none the less, and had his own horse that he wasn't so good at riding.

The sun was just now deciding to show itself, making it even more humid than before, and miserable. Around the entire acre was trees so where they'd be riding, after I decided that I wouldn't be touching a horse in caution that I'd most likely fall off. I looked at him as if he told me the sky was purple when he offered for me to ride one of the horses.

"Ha ha..." I said blankly and then shook my head, crossing my arms. "No."

"But you _have _to!" He sounded like his little self when I was scared to go out on the water on the small little sailboat because last time we healed over enough the boat almost tipped over but he told me it wasn't even close. I hardly trusted him after that... Now the horse will probably hate me or something and rise up on his feet. He went into the smell barn and appeared with two helmets, one of which he was already putting on his head, and he threw the other to me to catch.

"Would it make you feel better if you rode with me? It's not so horrible when you have someone else, you know." He hinted imploringly and I only stayed there, crossing my arms and pressing my lips firmly together.

"_Come on_! It'll be an _adventure_!" he pouted and I smiled stupidly for he mimicked my_ own_ words. He pulled one leg over the horse, and sat taller than me, looking down boldly, like a strapping young knight on a brilliant steed. I blushed at this silly thing and then looked to his outstretched hand. "Don't you trust me?"

"More than anything." I replied furrowing my brow.

"Then put your helmet on and get up here." He pressed excitedly. I did so, looking to him as I strapped it under my chin, and held onto his hand, and mimicked his actions from before getting onto the horse uneasily and sat on its bare back with my legs wrapped around it's stomach.

"Loosen your legs or else you'll make it nervous." He said, holding onto my waist steadily, and I felt secure in that position, though it would probably hurt twice as much with him on top of me and on the hard and muddy ground below.

"Reach out and grab the reins," he said soothingly and took one of my hands and led it to the leather strap tied in between the horse's teeth, and onto its neck. He reached his arms around me, and grabbed them from my hands holding them through his hand, and his thumb on top.

"Hold them like this." He instructed calmly.

"But-" I rushed nervously.

"Do as I say and you'll be fine. This is a nice horse, aren't you Caesar?"

I laughed at the name quietly, and gripped the reins just as he did. He pressed his warmer body against mine, causing me to lean a little further carefully.

"Now... Tap the stomach with your ankles and he will begin to walk. Tug the reins to tell it where you want to go." He explained. "But don't do it too hard." He added passively and I did so, feeling like I was in one of those western movies, the heat beginning to beam down on us. The horse began to move and I leaned into Raoul in reaction, feeling it's back bones begin to move, my heart fluttering that he might suddenly go faster. I tugged at the left rein and he went that way.

"Awesome... now sit up straight and it'll give you more support." I obeyed uneasily. "See? It's not so hard."

I shook my head in the negative. It walked a little further that we were almost halfway up the pasture, and then he told me to tap the stomach a little harder.

"What will that do?" I asked warily.

"You'll see." I knew he smiled then, and the horse began to move faster just as I did that. It was actually kind of fun, my fear erased immediately as Raoul gripped me tighter, pulling his arms around my chest. "You're doing great, Christine! Now... shake the reins." I did so excitedly, and the horse began to trot quickly, and we moved around it almost too easily.

"Lean down in order not to fall off and absorb the bumps." The horse was running now, and we were going in circles, through the trees of the broad pasture. I laughed, feeling extremely freed of everything around us, that it was just me and him in a wonderful dream, riding through the pasture like in a fairytale. As soon as the horse was tired, we were walking it back to the stables to fetch some water for the horse and ourselves.

My pants were rather dirty, and as was my bottom, but it was worth it. I was smiling stupidly, feeling my legs were wobbly but I was fine altogether, wiping the sweat from my forehead.

"I'm going to miss having you around here. My brother is no fun at all." He pouted, grabbing the hose and kicking the bucket to where the horse could reach it.

"I'm sorry," I replied with a small smile. "Will you be there for the performance tomorrow?"

"My brother is going to our box, so I suppose I'll come as well." He shrugged. "It'll be a gift to hear you sing again." He said through the noise of the hose hitting the bucket. I shrugged as well, crossing my arms.

"Where's the water bottles?" I asked.

"In the small fridge near the dry erase board," he pointed to the door to the barn and I shuddered, knowing I'll be faced with something foul-smelling, so I scrunched my nose and opened the huge door revealing just what I thought it'd be, and went into the small white fridge, getting out a cold water bottle, and I forgot to ask him if he wanted one. I walked near the door.

"Do you want one?" I asked, and waited for the answer, near the door. When I didn't receive one so soon, I looked out of the door and to my most unpleasant surprise... Raoul was gone completely, the hose still on, and the horse tied to the small post, looking surprised itself.

"Raoul!" I screamed, my heart pounding against my chest, and the icy feeling of fear running through and through my spine. "Why does this always happen!?" I cried to nobody, feeling my heart race and everything seemed to be at a blur. I ran to the pasture and looked around at the vast expanse of trees and bushes that clouded it. He could be _anywhere_!

Relax, Christine... he probably went to go get something and was startled by something, therefore leaving the horse still standing there and... and the bucket overflowing of water. Yes, that's usual... Calm down, Christine... I'll find him.

I ran through the barn to see if I could find him there, but no such luck. I sprinted across the field, my feet feeling tingly and disgusting, and probably stepping in horse poop along the way, but I was panicked enough that I couldn't smell it or anything, my heart thudding in my ears so loudly, and fear was so heavy that I almost tripped over blades of grass.

"Raoul!" I screamed, feeling utterly helpless.

"Christine! I'm over here!" He cried out, and I ran for his muffled voice in whatever direction it was in, feeling extremely relieved that I could feel my feet again. I then heard him cry out and my heart would have gave way right there and then, but I had to see what was the matter... I had to find him... I had to tell him everything was okay just like he would for me. I never seemed to find him.. I never could no matter where I looked.

It was all too quick that everything was now a blur in my vision but I was _grabbed_ by some unseen force, and I felt my feet give way. I kicked at the air until I found something I could kick, screaming out, and hitting whatever I could of the unseen thing, and it didn't take too long for me to realize that it was a black figure that was tall and skinny and everything I always knew he'd be like. It was possibly the most startling thing he's pulled off so far, and I began to scream my lungs out, trying to find a way out of his solid grasp. I pulled and bit and cursed the entire time, but to no avail. I think it was one specific thing I said... I don't exactly remember when (for it seemed like eternity he was fighting me as I fought him), but I felt a weakness point in his hold, and I took off running like I've never ran before, smiling to myself that I made it out. I went on running until I was near the barn screaming the entire way for Raoul, probably ruining my voice so much that I couldn't shriek much longer. My feet trampled over some rock that was right over mud from the previous rain, and it was in a split second that I was covered in mud.

It was all too quick, I was immediately hurdled over to and my mouth wrapped in a foul-smelling cloth that caused me to pass out into something other than mud... but the rest was all black from there.

I awoke... in a car. A familiar car due to many terrible memories. I had to blink a few times to make sure this was no nightmare, and then pinch myself, but I ached all over, so it hurt. I gasped in pain from doing that much. I looked over to the masked man dressed in black from head to foot, and some odd feeling came over me, and I looked at him skeptically.

"Erik?" I asked, but he didn't move. "Why... why did you do this?" I asked, my voice very cramped and weak from screaming not too long ago.

"Don't speak to me, Christine," He answered, that voice pained and very weak as well. "Your voice needs rest now after you so stupidly ruined it not too long ago..."

"I _have _to perform tomorrow, Erik! _Take me back_!" I gave that petty excuse which, of course, he would no longer accept.

"Yes, that seems perfectly reasonable, my _dear_. So you could take advantage of me once more and run away with that stupid _boy _once you're finished. You really shouldn't think me so stupid, Christine." He hissed acidly.

"But they need _someone_ to perform." I might as well use it dry until it's dead. I gave the stupid thought that I could annoy the hell out of him and maybe he'd let me go because I was so childish and naïve which is when I realized that I've _always_ been like that.

"They'll get someone else, but _my_ Christine isn't going tomorrow."

"I'm not yours, nor was I ever, Erik!" I defended quickly, "You _lied_ to me, you jerk! You lied and told me that we were married, _and_ that you were my guardian and I didn't even _have _ a damned guardian!"

"You've done your own share of lying." He replied smoothly and I saw his golden eyes that seemed to glow like fire at the moment, staring at the road and driving fast, look pointedly down to my hand that rested tensely on my lap. I looked down to where he did, and looked back to him questioningly, not understanding.

"I never lied to you." I replied with a quiet and raspy voice.

"I beg to differ," He replied and snatched my left hand from my lap and something horrible went through my entire back as he grabbed it with so much force it hurt. I noticed just then that his ring was gone from my fourth finger.

"_Oh_..." I replied feeling fear come through my entire body. "I don't even remember taking it off, though! I don't believe I ever did, Erik! You must believe me!" He was hurt deeply, and I think that he scoffed to himself in another language before making it apparent and understandable to me.

"How can Erik tell that you're not lying to him, Christine? He heard every word that you said, every single one... he knows everything, and don't think he doesn't. I understand _everything_, you damned witch..."

"No you _don't_!" I huffed back, feeling hot tears prick my eyes.

"I thought I saved you from going to that foster home and coming with me... And you took advantage of _everything_ I ever gave to you. Not once did you ever think to look back to your poor Erik... And how selfish are _you_ now? I give you a chance to study at a conservatory and you run away from it to that _boy_ who could give you _nothing_! I trusted you... I _love_ you... I let you go because I love you... can't you _see_?"

I had nothing to say, and put my head into my hands and sobbed. He wouldn't listen to me even if I tried. He would mend things and make the worst out of it when all I wanted to do was to not hurt him. "I didn't want to harm you... I-I thought... you weren't going to come back..."

"Why would _you_ care?" He spat back acidly. "All you ever have done is harm me, Christine... over and over again... it's okay to harm things you hate, isn't it? You've shown me enough of that before, have you not?"

"I don't _hate_ you..." I whimpered, choking back more tears to sound strong, though I was breaking. "I've told you that before."

"I can't listen to that anymore, Christine."

"Oh, _please_..." I begged and he raised a strict hand to silence me, the car had finally stopped, though, so his hand was off the steering wheel, and his hand could have easily came near my face to strike it but it seemed to have stopped in midair.

"Make up your mind, Christine!" He spat suddenly taking me aback once more.

"Erik-" I began but he silenced me by putting a hand over my mouth, of which I could have bit, but... Ick, never mind. I could only glare at him, frozen in a rebellious position.

"You don't need to speak, dear... no, not until it's time." He pressed dangerously, finally he let go of my mouth and got out of the car.

"What... what do you mean...?" I asked, getting out of the car as well before he touched me again.

"You can hurt things you hate, right? It's perfectly reasonable, is it not? Well... I think I will hurt the thing I hate most today... I'll hurt him _a lot_."


	26. Doomed

**Sorry for the latest update yet. My laptop's AC adapter broke and it's been down until we could get to the store and get another one (my gosh those things are so dang expensive), not only that but we've been going to the beach often. It's been great, but what I looked forward to the entire time was writing for it's so amusing. Read and review and tell me what you think!**

~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 26:_

_Doomed_

I looked at him dumbfounded, my jaw hanging open.

"How would he be here...? He can't be here!" I was assuring myself, of course, but it wasn't_ impossible_... Anything is really possible with Erik as I've discovered over this past half year or so. My heart did happen to skip a few beats.

"I beg to differ, once more, dear..." He said coolly.

"You can hurt me... It's my fault, but don't touch him... he doesn't deserve any of this..." I pleaded as he dragged me by my wrists into the all too familiar and horrific house. "You can't let jealousy do this! Erik... please...you can't do this!"

"I'm sure I can. I'm perfectly able to kill, my dear... you possibly have no idea, do you? Well, this may be very enlightening after all this time, shan't it?" I looked at him in pure disbelief as he threw me onto the couch angrily.

"You can't _do this_, Erik! How do you think I'll love you now? Where did your mind go?!" I asked, trying to rise to my feet. He laughed dryly, not something beautiful as I remembered it, but plainly insane and mad

"I have _no idea..." _He laughed sickeningly. I scoffed disgustedly, feeling sick to my stomach, blood fall from my cheeks and began to pale.

"If you're going to be ill, I suggest you using a bowl." He said looking back to me with eyes that burned, huffing pacing around the room like an about-to-burst animal. I was desperate. I had to convince him somehow that this was wrong... that I wasn't lying that I _actually _loved him once. I cried when I thought I'd never see him again. I couldn't... not now. I couldn't show any affection right now... not when he's trying _to kill Raoul!_ I would die if this goes through... I wouldn't be able to live if he wasn't in this world right now. All I could think of was that I _had_ to save him, I had to be brave somehow.

"Erik..." I whispered, brokenly, still feeling very sick. "I _know_ you're better than this..." I said quietly.

"Don't try me," He spat venomously.

"Then what do you want from me!?" I cried out, dropping to my knees before him, clasping my hands together. "Just..." I gasped, "I'll do _anything_..."

"I want what all normal men want," he said looking down to me, almost mockingly and I trembled anxiously again.. "I want a wife...I want her to touch me without looking away in disgust, I want her to come and sit next to me and sing with me, and look upon my face without screaming and pushing me away."

I looked at him with shock and pity, my eyes wide, still on my knees which were trembling.

"I'll do it..." I whispered brokenly, bowing my head low.

"Well, maybe I don't want you!" He spat suddenly, taking me aback. "Maybe I don't want a wife who would put herself under a car just when she says 'I do.' Maybe I don't _want _a martyr."

"When will you learn marriage comes gradually?"

He stuttered for a second, and looked down to me those eyes still blazing, still not able to peel myself off the floor. "You _wouldn't_..."

"Well, how do you know?" I asked looking up to him. "What if I told you I thought I'd die if you did, Erik... I thought you were dying... I thought that someone very dear to me would go away just like they _always_ _do!_ Raoul's my friend, too... He's my best friend that was there for me when you weren't, he was there before you, and you can't think of taking him away! Don't take him _away_ from me..." I pleaded, beginning to cry into the floor still before him.

"You try my patience!" he barked knocking me backward. "After your Erik has been so patient! After he thought you would be happy by letting you go and you cower just like I thought you would! And you cower before me now!"

"Because you're scaring me, Erik!" I cried.

"Am I?" He asked grimly.

"_Stop this_! You're insane! Leave Raoul alone and I'll be forever yours and be your wife just as you want!"

"It's too late." He hissed back.

"Erik!" I moaned.

"He's going to die, Christine. It's too late to help him now! You've past every point of no return," He spat hotly, his temper now scaring me overly. I felt broken... he wouldn't even return the same thought even if I approached him with it... it was to tear his walls down bare until I could reach that man, and cut it straight to him. But I couldn't bring myself to! Oh, what is wrong with me?!

"Where is he?" I yelled at him, holding onto his jacket tightly. "Take me to him! _Please_!"

"Very well," He said dully, and grabbed my wrists tightly and dragged me through a door I've never been able to see through (one of the many, of course) that led to a staircase leading down to a basement I never knew this house held. And now that I think on it... I never _wanted _to. He's such a twisted man with a horrible mind... I shuddered as I was dragged down these rough stairs, it was too dark to see anything. A wall revealed a dim light... a dim light that was the only light in this basement.

"Erik, what is it!?" I asked, trembling harshly.

"Why, it's a forest, Christine." He said too bittersweetly.

"You're lying!" I cried out.

"How can I?" He asked, as if talking to a two-year-old, and I felt like I would _slap_ him, and I eventually tried to but didn't reach his mask, and glared at me, his eyes like fire right now.

"You think pulling off my mask would help anything?" He asked, laughing insanely. Well Erik, if you didn't have that damned mask, then I could have hurt you.

Well, instead... I _kicked _him... And I believe it hurt me more than it hurt him for my foot which was hardly clothed in any sort of hard material began to ache insanely. To set the record here, there's not any possible way for me to harm Erik except through words. And words weren't something that was coming easily for me right now unless I was setting myself up to be mocked.

"This is where Raoul is?" I begged him this question which happened to be answered on itself.

"CHRISTINE!" My name was being shouted in panic, in anxious and wary way that made me tremble even more violently. I turned to where it was coming from... from a wall that_ glowed_... Walls are not supposed to glow if not a wall at all.

"Erik!" Someone else shouted his name, which was even more strange.

"Oh, you're in there too, Daroga?" Erik sounded, looking like a black shadow moving as a ghost over to the strange wall.

"In where? Erik! Answer me!"

"In the forest!" He said, still laughing like a child. I slapped what I think was his arm, and that had some sort of effect that he turned around and looked at me, holding my wrists up.

"Let them go or I'll hate you forever as I_ hate _you now!" What the hell was that? That got nowhere for he only became angrier, and painfully gripped my wrists as he would have done before and the blood flow seemed to have gone from my hands, and I screamed.

"They're in the torture chamber, love.." I pouted in disgust at the sweetness, but became lower as I fought myself down to the floor once more, sobbing harshly.

It was like everything was frozen, for Erik let go of my wrists as I glided downward and at his feet for the umpteenth time today... I wished he would have just disposed of me there as he would for anyone else, but there was no such luck. I had to do something, for no words came to my mouth, I had to _do_ something. I thought hard, though I could hardly hear my own thoughts for my head beat intensely and everything hurt so much. What was something Erik would have always became tender for? What would make him get out of this horrible position that I knew he wasn't like?

A kiss.

It was that simple... two words and so much more to them that would make me explode, he would want me to kiss him. I knew that he went on and on about how he was never kissed before, about how he's never been loved before and I knew this was the right way to do so. I had to think over it quickly, thinking of my actions for I've never really kissed someone before, unless being put forth to do so... for instance with Raoul, and it's dark down here so it'd be awkward. But it was worth a shot.

My knees felt like jelly, and I shook so much, so I had to cling onto him, wrapping one arm around his figure, grabbing hold like a life jacket in case I fell, I moved a hand to his mask... where I probed it to make sure and he was too much in a state of shock that he didn't move at all, I moved a finger behind it and pulled it off, feeling his strange skin, and for the third time I saw his face in a hardly lit room but it was just enough that I could see his nose-less death's head staring at me with shock, and I was in my own state of shock of which I had to choke down in order for this concept to work.

I moved up on the balls of my feet for he didn't know this was coming and didn't bother to move down to reach me, but I found his lips after a while, and pressed my own against them, so shook up with worry that I barely brushed them onto his, and though he was so startled and befuddled at the time, he moved closer and seemed to immediately beg for more, that affection-starved man simply wanted more and I couldn't refuse him. I leaned in closer, my hand now pressed upon his bony chest to push him away were if anything uncomfortable happen, and kissed him even more deeply. Thank God Raoul couldn't have saw this for he would never understand it. Once I had enough, I pressed my head sideways against Erik's chest, waiting for him to reply or do_ something, _and he did eventually, at least, for his bony and long arms came around me, in a pursuit of utmost tenderness, holding me as if I was his small child.

It seemed like too long I stayed there, too long that I feared Raoul would have already been dead before I could have awoken Erik, for I no longer heard his shouts and pleas.

After eternity, he pulled away suddenly, and his golden eyes locked with mine for a second of understanding, no words could have described the look of longing in his eyes. I knew he wouldn't let me go right then... He was far too hungry for more, but at least I saved my best friend. Erik floated swiftly away, and pressed something on the wall and the room was entirely dark.

More light came on eventually, and for a brief moment of fear, I thought for sure Raoul and the Persian man was dead.

I no longer saw Erik's glowing eyes turning toward me, and I think he went through the wall that was recently glowing with a strange light.

He returned carrying Raoul over his shoulder like a potato sack, so fluently that he didn't even bother being careful with him. I glared at him, which caused him to lighten up..

"Go into the living room, Christine," He said so softly his words were hardly audible, soft and delicate, though his voice, then, was as broken as any normal human would have had, and I looked at him tensely, and nodded slowly, feeling my neck had been frozen still. I tried to get myself to move, not believing I actually kissed him to get things moving again, and I felt as scared and frightened as a little girl all over again, walking up the dark stairs, leaning toward the wall for support. I heard him follow me just as warily as I was, my knees still trembling with anxiety that Raoul's heartbeat probably wasn't so awesome right now.

Erik placed Raoul... rather violently onto the couch for I gasped warily, and he shot me a warning glare that was even more threatening without his mask before opening his mouth and saying, "He's alive."

I sighed, placing myself deeper into the chair to show him I was not willing to do anything more, though I was deceptive, my mind hated the very thought of this. He held up a finger and then disappeared. I rushed quickly over to Raoul and placed my head against his chest, trying to listen for as definite sign of a heartbeat, though he was terribly warm, I needed to be near him. I brushed my hand through his hair, and listened to his breathing as if it would save me.

"I love you... I love you..." I whispered over and over again, "I'll see you again, maybe... but I might never... I'll always remember you, Raoul..." I found myself sobbing horribly into his chest, grateful to God he was alive, that it must _mean _something that God still wants him to exist, so may it be.

Erik found me there, I knew that because I found two skeletal hands on my shoulders that threw me away from him instantly.

"You are _mine_ now!" He hissed venomously, and I looked up to him once more on my knees, shaking all over, feeling like I should be begging for mercy.

"Erik, _I know!_" I shot back with as much energy as I could afford, and gathered myself back into the chair, curling my legs up to my chest and looking at him as if he might just bite anytime soon, my eyes widened horrifically.

"_Christine-" _He whispered suddenly, reaching toward me, and I backed further into the chair, turning my head to the side, wondering if he should slap me. This is his mood swings, which I probably deserved to receive, but one minute he's the devil, next he's a broken man, and then before you know it he's an amazing man again. There has to be something unhealthy... there has to be something wrong whether it be mental or not. "I'm sorry..." He articulated, still by me and kneeling down once more. "I-I-I..." He stuttered, his hand coming up shakily, trying to reach for mine, searching for it, "I don't... don't know what came over me... If you could forgive me one last time... I _love_ you..."

"I _know_." I replied hotly, taking my knees even closer to myself. He huffed and let himself fall limply down.

"I saved him... If he went any longer he'd be dead... I _know_ you love the boy..." He admitted dryly, "I can't change that... you don't even _have _to love me back... We could... be friends. Good friends as I once heard you say we were... tell me this and not lie and I would give you the world at your feet. If you want, I'll ask for your hand as you've always wanted, give you the wedding you always dreamed of..."

I couldn't say anything to him, simply looking at him speculatively, for he was extremely desperate, and it tugged at my heart how much he wanted me that he didn't even care anymore if I loved Raoul very much, and he even admitted it. It _was _a big step for him and his sudden selflessness after I've been so selfish recently. I was aghast, almost, that he was willing to put forth his pride just so we could have somewhat of a relationship so that if he remained like this we might just be peaceful, and he was putting forth so much...

I fought back tears, but it didn't even work, so tears were going down my cheeks as I leaned forth, unwrapping myself from the fetal position I was just in, for we were both very weak.

"My poor Erik," I whimpered, kissing his waxy forehead still shivering, and he seemed to tense under my touch, rising and falling as I touched and pulled away, as if savoring it.

"Oh...Oh..." I heard him sigh, trembling, and I wept with him, pity tugging immensely on my heart. "_Christine_..." my name was heard through the words I couldn't hear, he said my name like it was a prayer, like he could murmur it as if in worship, bowing before me and all I could do was sit and watch and not able to do anything. It was the strangest and most peculiar feeling in the world to be worshiped as an idol, it wasn't good at all. I felt awful for being numb about it, but decided in my mind that I really couldn't stop him, if he really _must_ do this for my affection, then let the broken man be for I already kicked him enough. His face, no matter how much I try to deny it, was just as terrible as it was always is, especially when crying, twisted in even more ways then it already was, and being noseless, it was quite a messy thing. I knelt down to his level, and wrapped my arms around him as he wept into my shoulder, feeling it necessary to comfort him for it must be more than just this epiphany that is troubling him so much... it's his history that he takes great care in hiding from me, and I was comforting it... it felt kind of nice, actually... very nice.

We stayed like that for a while, and he stopped sniffling, and I wiped away his tears that lingered on his cheeks, and I smiled a little, finding it awkward and kind of humorous in a way and I smiled to him, trying to imagine he had a nose... I mean... the skin and stuff is fine, but it was always the fact he had no such thing as a nose, it was far-fetched.

"Oh, I love you..." He said, bringing himself to me once more, and I looked to the ceiling, praying that God would help me for once with this man... I could fix him, I know I could... I just didn't know what to do, exactly, if he would listen for once... If I _taught_ him to listen.

The moment was broken when Raoul stirred, and he backed away cautiously, looking to Raoul on the couch, and I did the same, except very slowly, watching him carefully, thinking he might just break his word and choke him or something... But to nothing, he watched me as I watched him, and I broke it by looking to Raoul warily.

"What are you going to do with him, Erik?" I asked softly, trying to breathe in steadily but it never seemed to work, and he didn't answer for the longest time, sighed, and spoke his answer.

"You need not worry, my angel... He will be perfectly safe wherever I leave him be." Erik confided slowly, and took Raoul's wrist and pressed two fingers onto it, and seemed to count to himself, taking his pulse. "He's almost back to normal." He noted to satisfy me fully. I nodded and settled myself back onto the chair, watching him swiftly leave the room. Once Erik was gone, Raoul opened his eyes to see me, sitting there.

"Christine..." He weakly said, reaching out for me, but I couldn't satisfy his longing, still thinking with instinct that Erik would pull me away. I shook my head, taking my knees closer to him, I felt myself breaking under the impression I'll never have a wonderful time in the sun with him again, never be able to be ourselves, playing with each other, hiding under the covers and telling stories, and never overlook to the ocean and see a lighthouse in the distance... and I won't ever be wrapped in his warm, reassuring arms... I'll never have my best friend and brother back to me.

"Raoul," I whispered though it was probably not understandable through my sniffling. "Raoul, I have to leave you... I can't... I_ can't_ leave Erik, and he needs me."

"You're wrong... I'll _kill_ him if he hurts you! I'll _kill _him!"

"Oh, Raoul..." I whispered, shaking my head. "No... No, he won't hurt me. He won't hurt me anymore."

"How could you?" He was aghast.

"I love you always, Raoul, and if we could be together, we would..."

"When he's gone come to me. Come to me and I'll fight him if need be."

"No..." I shook my head again, though my words happened to have no noise.

I watched Erik come back and tell me to go to my room and reluctantly, I complied, and went up to my room, looking behind my shoulder every fifth step, walking up with a strange feeling of belonging. That I don't really belong in the outside world, for it doesn't need me.


	27. The Fear of Goodbye

**Sorry for another long-awaited update. I've been going to the beach and getting a little more inspiration to continue, for I'm not sure whether I should end it just yet or not. That and it's been rather hard finding any good internet signal. I will probably have another chapter up because of another 6-hour car ride and utmost irritation with my family. 2 week vacations are the best and the worst *sigh*.**

Well, tell me what you think (as always) and I'll be thanking you once more for the reviews so far.

With love to you all,

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Chapter 27:_

_The Fear of Goodbye_

I laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling, half-expecting to see Erik coming in at anytime, but all I received was a locked door and a sigh. I was angry, of course... he doesn't even trust me as much as to let me go around the house anymore. What could be worse than him having a coffin in his room anyway and the room evidently dedicated to me? I shudder thinking of what more he possibly could be hiding from me, things that are despicable... Well, on the other hand, maybe I'll just let Erik tell me when it's time, seeing that I really can't escape him anyway and I had no heart to turn him down again... He needed me more than Raoul, clearly...

The bedroom was the usual, something I've stared at and studied for a good long time, some of my things, thought, were out of place. With a furrowed brow and shaking hand, I went about the room scoping what was missing and what was not... I went into the drawer of my desk to find things mixed around, and all of the things I kept in here that weren't meant to be seen by eyes other than my own. Notes to Raoul, a few more leaves of paper from my diary were still in here, though more creased than I would have left them as.

Erik found me there, staring at the things that I held in my hands, and I heard his footsteps but I couldn't bring myself to look at him directly anymore.

"You... looked in here, didn't you?" I asked him trivially. He stuttered, and I heard his mouth open then shut, and breathed in a few times before answering.

"Yes," He answered ashamedly. I blinked a few times, and turned around looking at the creased folds of paper scrunched in my hands.

"You weren't... supposed to.." I stuttered breathlessly. "Those words-"

"I understand, Christine..." He replied softly, holding up a finger to silence me.

"But-"

"It takes time, does it not?" He asked me, tilting his head to the side, and placing his hand under my chin. "You said so yourself... From your... soft pink lips..."

I blushed possibly a bright tomato red, as his thumb ran over my cheek, he admired me quietly, fawning over what he had right now, and I could tell he was almost nervous by simply touching me. I felt goose flesh raise over my skin by his delicate touch, looking to the careful eyes behind the mask that made me feel like I was under some sort of x-ray.

"You don't pull away..." He noted somberly, "Do you forgive your Erik?" He asked suddenly.

I blinked a few times, thinking up a logical answer to this question, "I'll work on it." I answered honestly.

"One day, then?" He pressed, taking his hand away, and clenching it to his side and I nodded.

"Maybe," I replied, sighing, feeling my fingers let go of the memories of before written onto these little pieces of paper for they held my grudge for me right now, and all I needed was to unlock it to set them free... all I needed to do was forget... But I couldn't. How could I? I'll never be able to see Raoul again, I knew it... I said that before but now I _absolutely_ know it from the look in Erik's scornful eyes those last few moments.

"Where are you taking Raoul?" I asked on a whim.

"Somewhere," He scoffed angrily, and turned around.

"Erik- don't be like this!" I said, placing a hand on his shoulder that stopped him in his tracks before exiting the room to leave me alone again.

"You are _mine_ now... You shouldn't worry of others," He hissed, grabbing my wrist, and holding it up, and it hurt even more after the many times he's strained his hand over my wrist, the bone ached horribly.

"You're hurting me! Let go!" I cried, tugging at my wrists which were only beginning to hurt even more from pulling.

"I will _never_ let go of you!" He exclaimed, only to clench my wrists even tighter with his bony fingers.

"Stop... stop...!" I pleaded, beginning to sink down again, "My wrists hurt from you doing this all the time... Erik... _please_ just let go..." I begged.

He suddenly lightened his grasp and I dropped to the ground, disbelievingly, my mouth open and startled by his outburst. It was completely out of him once more, though before I would have thought he entirely meant it.

I found him on the floor again, and breathing in heavily, heaving in hacking coughs and I went into immediate panic.

"Erik?" I asked, coming closer to him, hurriedly. "You need help... something..." I said, trying to get his attention. "Erik, answer me..." I cried, feeling my heart thumping rapidly against my chest.

"Christine-" He coughed wickedly, "Christine-" he tried again, and I could tell he was trying to place something together, but I couldn't see. He was suffocating it seemed, so I only thought that his mask was worsening it. I leaned forth to untie it, but his hand came and weakly tried to stop me.

"This is making it worse... let me remove it," I pressed, reaching my arms back.

"No... Christine..." He pleaded with me for a moment, trying his hardest to get me away from the mask.

"You know it doesn't bother me... Come on..." I pressed, and quickly untied the strings, and placed the mask on the floor beside where I knelt down, and leaned him back, thinking hurriedly of all the things I could do... call 911 but he wouldn't like that, I'm sure. I needed help for I had no clue on medical things and I don't even know what his problem even was. I felt myself begin to cry in helplessness for he could be dying right now and I would just be sitting here just like my father.

"What can I do?" I asked him.

"Get Anne..." He coughed again, and I nodded and ran down the stairs screaming Anne's name, into the kitchen and in the living room until she finally showed showed herself coming out of the library.

"Christine?" She asked, tilting her head to the side, furrowing her brow, in her usual skirts

"It's Erik... he's having some sort of attack and I need you to help! He is coughing and heaving..." I said, my words coming together to sound like one big slur, but somehow she understood and nodded, and grabbed my shoulders.

"Where is he?"

"In my room." I answered, feeling tears falling rapidly, seeing that she was as worried as I in this situation.

"Lay him on your bed if you don't mind and I'll be right there." She said as quickly as I and scurried off to another door I am yet to see through, and I ran back up the stairs to my room, to see Erik laying there, as pale as ever, and his eyes shut, though I still saw his chest rapidly rising and falling. I wasn't sure if I could get him up there myself, for he was very tall and possibly at least over one hundred pounds- something I knew I couldn't lift up. He wouldn't be able to help me, so I don't think I'd be able to get him up to my bed without Anne. So, I waited, kneeling by Erik's side and holding his freezing hand, clasped in between mine.

"I won't let you go..." I sobbed, feeling the same horror I felt as my Dad was slowly passing on slowly becoming colder and colder until he was a light blue, and his breath had stopped. I couldn't do that... I couldn't see death again, I couldn't face it again without being in it, I've seen too much. No matter who it was... Erik who loved me so, Erik who tried to give me everything, I couldn't let him go. Saying goodbye was as much as a fear I have of mine that is as strong as death in itself.

_I won't ever let you go_... I heard his words come into my mind, and I felt his grasp somehow tighten on my hand. He said he wouldn't let me go... he _can't_ leave me here! I never realized I needed him this much...

Anne came up, holding some sort of leather bag in her hands, and placed it on the nightstand, looking down to me and holding his hand.

"I can't get him up there myself." I explained and she nodded, grabbing his bony legs as I grabbed his torso, and lifted him up there, without him stirring one bit. He was surprisingly light and I remembered it was because he hardly ate at all, and if he ever does wake up, I'll make sure this changes. I placed his mask onto the nightstand along with the bag, and sat by his side, and grabbed his hand again.

"I need you to hold his arm out for me..." She pressed calmly, "And check his vitals... do you know how to do that much?" She asked, and I shook my head in the positive, turning his arm over, and pressing two fingers against his wrist, his heart was beating quickly, probably as fast as mine. I pressed my hand against his forehead, and it was rather warm, which was something like a good sign, for it was life, but I could be very wrong.

"He's warm." I said, looking to Anne who held a syringe, and I gagged in a gasp, remembering my fear and hatred of needles in itself.

"You can look away," She apologized, seeing the tint of possible green coloring my face, and I complied by turning away, holding my mouth from gagging anymore, my stomach doing flips.

"Finished," She replied, and I turned back around to see her holding gauze to the arch of his elbow, and I swallowed hard.

"Will he be okay?" I asked.

"He may or may not pull out of it in a few hours." She answered knowingly.

"Has this happened before?" I pressed further.

"One other time..." She answered this with a sense of sorrow, looking back, and pity.

"When?"

"A few days ago," She knowingly replied, shaking her head and sighed, leaning in to feel his forehead as well. I swallowed hard again, feeling my hand begin to shake as I ran my finger through his thin black hair, and wiped my tears away.

"While I was gone... when I betrayed him..." I moaned, feeling bad simply petting his thin hair back.

"It's not your fault," She said hesitantly.

"Yes, it is!" I moaned, "He could have _died... _he could have _died _without seeing me again, and that would be _horrible_... Erik..." I said, leaning into his chest feeling his labored breathing beginning to soften.

"But Christine, it's not you...it's_ him_..."

"How could he make himself do that, then?" I furrowed my brow, looking up. She sighed and shook her head.

"It's something he never should have even thought of doing... I don't feel obliged to tell you." She said with a sort of finality, and it gave me hope that she meant he wasn't about to die in front of me... so that he would be able to answer my many questions she just presented to me. I nodded, and looked to the clock... which read midnight. I massaged my temples and looked to Anne.

"Will he be fine for the night?" I questioned.

"He should be waking up in the morning..." She replied, nodding her head, and looking down to the sleeping man who looked like a resting corpse which only perturbed me slightly if I didn't know any better, if I knew I couldn't shun him any longer just because of his appearance.

I knew he wasn't in his right mind for some sort of reason... I knew he was better than that.

I prayed to God that night to heal him so that we both may start over... if we started over everything would be okay again, right? This was just a scare... right?

I laid down next to him on the other side of the bed, and watched him rest, looking more peaceful than ever, and it was kind of relieving in many ways... Watching him like he was a child before me, doing anything and everything... His chest moving evenly up and down, and his head back to... something like a normal temperature, at least. I didn't sleep for the longest time, trying to take the day in, and swallow it whole just to have my own moment of peace, but probably two hours later, I fell into a dreamless and shaken up sleep, nestled near Erik's unconscious body.

I woke up at nine in the morning, finding myself above the covers and Erik stirring next to me, showing at least a little bit of life other than last night. That was a good sign, at least... He might wake up soon...

I took a shower, finding a few pieces of clothes that were left behind before he took me to the Conservatory, jean and a sweatshirt which was fine enough, and found extra toiletries in the cabinet, using them to get ready for the morning, and blow-dried my hair.

I walked out, and found Erik just beginning to wake. I quickened to be by his side, grabbing his hand.

"...Christine?" He asked dully, squinting his eyes, looking over to me.

"Yes, I'm right here..." I replied comfortingly.

"Don't leave me..." He replied, still very dim and dreamily.

"I'm not," I replied sincerely.

"Close the blinds..." He ordered, shutting his eyes against the bright morning light, and I nodded, walking over to the window and closed the curtains, looking back to him.

"Where did you go?" He questioned, his voice was hardly containing it's usual beauty.

"I was right here the entire time, Erik." I replied.

"You left me..."

"No, I didn't... I never left you... I'm _right here_..." He wasn't in the right mind once more, seeming to be delirious. He winced, and looked up to me, those golden eyes glistening. It hurt me seeing him like this, not the usual Erik, but his usual strength stolen away from him which was all he ever had in the world.

I stayed there, talking to him, reassuring him that I wasn't going to leave, and every so often we would have a somewhat usual conversation. He wouldn't reply with much, but enough to show me he was still there. I hummed a tune I knew and he went to sleep holding my hand. Knowing that he wouldn't wake up soon, I went downstairs to the library and took in a few books to read for the time being. Anne didn't approach me to give me any company... so I was alone in this huge house, waiting for my captor to wake up... how strange must this be?

Time was horrible... I found myself looking into Erik's dark music room which was the only door in this entire house without a lock. Well, that's what Erik said once, and then followed that explanation with some long statement about the world, and I found myself paying no such attention, so I can't give you the exact reason. It was nice, at least... It seemed music still lingered in this empty room, as if haunted by it. His opera seemed to play over and over again in my head when I looked over to that hateful stack of music resting on the music holder on top of the piano. He never told me its name, and for fear it would be something I didn't want to know, I rested without asking him.

I went into the living room and turned around to see Erik sitting on the couch casually, with his mask back on and acting like he was there the entire time. I nearly screamed, dropping the book I was reading onto the floor.

"I thought you were sleeping," I noted breathlessly.

He seemed to be amused, but he stared at me for a few long seconds before taking an answer.

"I couldn't leave you alone to the house," He said as if I was the one in the wrong here.

"But-" I hesitated, looking him up and down, "You were- you were..."

"Yes, I was rather ill, wasn't I?"

"Why? You scared me..."

"I have a remarkable ability to heal quickly, darling..." He sighed, and outstretched an arm for me to come near. I stayed my distance, but stepped further into the living room.

"But why were you sick... I thought I lost you..." I huffed, feeling almost stupid myself.

He sighed roughly, and stood up and came near me, taking me gently, but firmly by the arms and led me back toward the couch, as if I was as light and easy as a feather, and sat me, by force, next to him.

"I don't understand," I whispered dimly, as he took strands of my hair and ran his fingers through them, trying to calm me, it seemed.

"You don't have to understand everything." He answered, trying to get me to be lulled with his light voice, but I was too determined to know what he was hiding.

"Erik... explain to me..." I plead. "If I am to stay here with you, I need to know why you are sick..."

"I'm better right now to have you near me and that's all you need to know." He said softly, and I felt like a doll of some sort being forced to sit here.

"Erik-" I moaned, but he shushed me sweetly, running his hands through my hair even more, and I was almost lulled to lean back against his chest, his arms wrapping around me, and it was all so gentle, so careful.

"What do you want to do, my Christine? Are you hungry? Would you like to sing?" He asked, and I shook my head in the negative to both.

"Oh, won't you sing for me?" It was so bittersweet that all I could possibly feel was suspicion.

"If you do something for me, then I'll sing for you." I replied, furrowing my brow.

"It's not worth it then." He sniffed. I forced myself out of his grasp angrily.

"Now you're just being stubborn. Why won't you answer me?" I begged, feeling like I should stomp my foot, other than look like a fool.

"Because singing isn't supposed to come with a price..." He answered innocently. "It should be something you'd want o do anyway."

"It is... but-"

"I'm not laboring you, Christine." He said automatically. God... he was so good with this avoiding thing, he should be paid for it. On another thought... he probably is somewhere down the line. I huffed, crossing my arms across my chest. I knew what may get him out of avoiding anything, but I fought with myself to do it, for it would be forcing myself and that wouldn't be necessary. I leaned forth, kissed his jaw, and stayed on the couch to see his reaction. He shut his eyes lightly, and then looked to me curiously.

"You can't buy me, either..." He said almost comically. I forced a smile, and crossed my arms again.

"Sure I can. Come _on_..." I pressed playfully. "You know you enjoyed it."

"It wasn't convincing enough," He said inevitably avoiding it even if I did manage to kiss him for the third time ever. I knew what he was hinting at.

"Don't be a child, Erik..." I grunted, rolling my eyes.

"Kiss me like you did last night, and I'll explain it to you."

"I think you're trying to buy me." I hissed using his own words, becoming more angered by the second just because of his whit and selfish teasing.

"Oh _please, _Christine? Please...? Just one more time... and I'll explain the world to you. I promise. Have I ever broken a _promise_?" He was now animatedly begging, clasping his hands together, once more being a child. I hissed again, and rolled my eyes. This man was _impossible_... how many times do I have to say that, anyway?

"You promise, then?" I questioned.

"I promise!" He confided excitedly, looking to me expectantly like a boy begging for a Christmas present. He would deny me nothing... and at the moment I couldn't either with the longing to know what his problem was.

"Fine," I whispered, coming closer, trying to be natural to please him as much as I could. "Close your eyes," I hinted, "So you're not distracted." I whispered, pushing myself further toward him, putting my hand against his mask, and raised it over his thin, twisted lips. I only intended on kissing him lightly when he pressed himself toward me, putting his hand in my hair again so I wouldn't get away. I waited until he was content, and then I backed away expectantly.

"You make me so happy, Christine," He mused for the slightest second. I narrowed my eyes, and crossed my arms.

"Erik..." I groaned. He sighed, and looked to me invitingly.

"I'll tell you everything, then..." He sighed.


	28. Disbelief

**I'm very sorry for the long wait. This campground has an internet cafe and I've been going kayaking and all that jazz along with meeting a few French people. I happen to speak a little French and I was speaking with a dude... and his name was something like Raoul. Haha. It was awesome. Anyways, here's another chapter, of course, and I'm thinking of ways to make this story longer for I really don't want to stop. The updates will become much slower because I'll be going to band camp all day after I get back from this vacation, but I'll try to make sure that I update at least twice a week. I'm sorry for those who adore the quick updates, but I actually will have a life soon!**

Tell me what you think, as usual.  
With love,  
~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 28:_

_Disbelief_

He was an addict. Well... that's what he told me plainly and sincerely. Honestly, it's not surprising, and he was thrilled to know that I could have already guessed if something more lead to it. Morphine... not something to smoke or something impeccably disgusting as that... well, he did that before I was around, anyway. The man has so many issues and went through so many things that I could have easily spotted that he would want to forget with some kind of drug like that. Not only was he addicted... the shameful part of it was that it was the very cause of these attacks that might very well kill him if he wasn't so strong. At least he wasn't smiling when he said these words, as I stood dumbfounded, he was on the verge of crying, I'm sure.

I didn't know what to say, honestly. What do you say in a time like this, anyway? I blinked at him a few times, my arms still crossed across my chest and I was breathing unevenly.

"You wanted the answer," He accused dryly. I nodded, and huffed, feeling drastically upset.

"Then you have to stop it then," I burst out angrily. "You can't leave me! You can't... just... kill yourself! No..." I took him in my arms, and let it out into his white shirt, and he was seemed quite surprised by my upset.

"Christine-" He began quietly, rubbing his hand in circles on my back, "There's a reason why it's an addiction, dear.."

"But... Erik..." I moaned into his shoulder.

"I can't stop... it will only make matters worse..." he answered breathlessly and I almost forgot that he was so fragile right now, I lightened my grip around his neck.

"Then... then there's something I can do, something..."

"There's nothing," He replied shamefully. "You... you want to be with your boy... You don't need Erik any longer..."

I looked up to him in disbelief... that's what he really thought? After all of this?

"No... I want you... I want to be with you... I don't want to say goodbye! Don't you see?" I cried, feeling my cheeks hot from the tears. "I hate saying goodbye... I hate leaving people I love... I won't let you slip away from me as well... not if I can help prevent it!"

"You..." He began breathlessly. "You... mean it... you mean what you say... then? After all I've done to you... And..." He shook his head.

"Of course I mean it... I don't want you to go..." I said, furrowing my brow.

"I meant-" He added.

"What?" I interrupted tensely.

"The other thing-" What other thing...? What was he getting at? I looked into his golden eyes that were glistening filled with hope and longing... another one of these prying things, but this obviously meant a lot. I looked back through what I said and then blinked at him, knowing the one single word that he was listening for. I made my mouth in an "o" shape, feeling stupid.

"You meant it?" He pressed further dully, seeing my realization.

Did I love Erik? Not the same way as Raoul, though, right? I mean... if anything I probably just fell in love... when I was deprived of him for such a long time... And here I am begging him not to leave me. This was obviously an awkward position, but what else did I feel for him? He's been waiting for this for such a long time... and his excitement for human contact... well, for mine in particular. I looked at him with my eyes wide, and nodded my head in the positive. Didn't I think this before, anyway? I thought he lulled me into it with his voice, but... he denied it... was it real the entire time, then? What he's given to me, what he's offered, who he is... Music incarnate. I love music, Erik is music... Then I love Erik. It made perfect logic!

Before I said anything more, I was pulled into an even tighter embrace. Uncomfortable to begin with, for he wasn't the most comfortable thing to be pulled up against for he was rather bony. He was crying, I knew it for I felt warm tears that weren't my own roll down my cheek and down my neck from his mask. It felt right, for once, it felt extraordinary. He didn't have more to say, and neither did I. Has anyone ever even loved Erik the way I did? Possibly not. Poor Erik...

"My mother never loved me..." He whispered into my hair just soft enough that I could hear his cry in my ear. "Oh, Christine... I've... never... ever been happier then I am right now... do you know that? I could go to Hell and smile..." That torn my heart into shreds, as I felt it melt through my chest and into the floor, like glass shattering. I felt needed for once... needed completely and intimately.

"This is why you can't die..." I mentioned into his shoulder, not able to move necessarily. He coughed dryly, and sounded like he was laughing almost.

"Never," He chuckled happily, sounding very giddy.

"Um..." I began, seeing that my air was almost being cut off by his arm around my neck, "Um... Erik... Could... you possibly let go, actually... it's not the most comfortable position ever... Just wondering." I chided into his shoulder.

"I'll never let go," He hinted once more, but lightly this time.

"Well, no... but right now... you see-" I began, and he laughed again, how I always loved his laugh, and loosened his grip so I could slip out of his arms and face him entirely. Well, face the mask at least.

"What would you like to do today, Christine? Anything? Everything? I could sign that contract and give you the world today, if you want..." He meant it comically, of course, but I couldn't let his glee down right now so I smiled to him, and shrugged.

"Shouldn't you be resting?"

"I don't give a damn," He cited briskly. "At the moment, I'm sure I could live through a thousand deaths for I have a reason to live."

"But-"

"You shouldn't worry so much," He laughed and I pressed my lips firmly together. He coughed and then shook his head, "Never mind, love..." He sighed, and coughed again.

"Do you need a drink?" I implored, and he shook his head in the negative while I stayed ready to do whatever.

"In truth, we should stay here... but you could sing if you want... go out for a walk... anything here..."

"Singing would be nice," I answered quietly, nodding.

"Very well," He answered, and got up unsteadily. I grabbed his hand to help him get out of the couch, and he took it firmly and led me to the familiar music room and to the piano bench and I stood near it as usual, waiting. It took him a second to speak again, looking at the keys serenely.

"This might sound strange... but you were humming something earlier." He noted, "I happened to listen in... Could you enlighten me, possibly, on how it played out?" He asked timidly, signaling to the ivory keys

I furrowed my brow, "It was just something my dad... composed once. I think it was the only thing he ever composed really... It's nothing..."

"But it is something..." He pressed speculatively. "Could you possibly play it for me, then? I'm sure you remember it after all this time. You once said you played the piano, did you not?"

"I taught myself," I added nervously.

"Oh, come... no need to be nervous, I'm not going to push you or anything, and I won't criticize." He begged now, of course, because it was always his second resort. I looked at him, then to the beautiful grand piano that was being offered for me to play. I nodded slowly, and he scooted aside, leaving me room to sit.

I ran a scale over my fingers with both hands, before looking to him wonderingly, watching me intently. I straightened my back, and pushed the right pedal and began to start the tune, but end on the wrong note. I felt myself redden from embarrassment, for he was the best musician I've ever known, and I felt so stupid and small trying to play for him.

"You can try again," He pressed not noticing my blaring red face. I nodded and spread my hand over the chord and the beginning note. I started playing the tune, remembering every detail with strange recollection. Thank God it was simply short, for I think I'd have messed up even more of it in the great musician's eyes. I usually had to skip the chords my fingers couldn't stretch out to with their unusual shortness.

I finished it after what seemed like an eternity, and looked back to him, still sitting there, thinking to himself.

"I'm guessing you can't reach all the necessary chords." He noted blankly, and I nodded again.

"I don't... really have long fingers and I never have..." I said awkwardly.

"It was good, Christine, you shouldn't criticize yourself so harshly..."

I looked to my hands, taking them off of his piano and into my lap. "But... if you'd like to know, you don't have to rearrange your father's work, but for learning purposes, for your fingers to fit, you could play this chord," He leaned over, and played a similar chord on the piano, and lightly touched my hand to bring it over the selected ivory keys, his touch bringing chills through my arm once more for some odd reason. It's like every time he touches me in the most lightest way, my body becomes a live wire, becomes so applicable to my walls tearing down... how could he make me so vulnerable?

He obviously saw my stiffness and took his hand away for me to take in where the keys were. "Are you alright?" He asked tenderly, and I found him speaking through my hair again.

I nodded reluctantly, shaking it out and looked back to him, waiting purposefully. "I'm fine," I confided quietly.

"You look faint again. Are you sure you're fine?" He asked, sounding worried.

"Erik," I started, smiling at his worry taking on all of a sudden. "All you need to be worrying about is yourself." I hinted furrowing my brow. "And I'll be perfectly fine as long as you are. Get it?" I asked impatiently.

He sighed, and then asked me what I'd like to sing and I picked a duet from Faust, which, I think, was Erik's favorite opera. It was usually a trio when performed but easily transposed into a love-stricken duet between Faust and Marguerite, one trying in vain for the affections of the other.

I sang the duet with him, almost perfectly matched, and almost always in tune, and I was in utmost peace until the piano stopped playing and he stopped singing. That triggered the same effect as I, and I cocked my head around to hear a door being banged on loudly. My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach when I looked to the scornfully angered Erik, the piano bench falling from behind and I quickly got out of the way before it fell on my foot. He launched for my arm, and dragged me out of the room to the living room and told me scornfully to go to my room. I was in no position as to rebel, so I did so, and ran up the stairs, my feet almost giving way from underneath.

I heard two voices, one very familiar and obviously very much so angered, and I heard Erik's, not speaking in another language. I heard my name several times, but I couldn't make out the brutal argument between the stranger and Erik.

My heart beat against my chest, hoping he wouldn't go into another attack from being overworked like so. The two voices were suddenly calmer after what seemed like hours, as I leaned up against the door to my room, pressing my ear hopelessly to the door.

I heard my name now being called fetchingly, and I shakily came to my feet, brushing myself off, taking on a sweatshirt before heading downstairs to the two men who were just fighting.

The Persian man was there again, and looked very tired and exhausted, and Erik was looking to me with unreadable eyes, half filled with hope and some other thing that I couldn't entirely make out through that mask.

I pressed my lips tightly together looking at the both of them back and forth, embarrassingly nervous. What did he want?

"Christine, come here." Said Erik imploringly, and gently grabbed both of my hands and entwined them with his own, taking them firmly as if the Persian man might take me out of his hold.

"What is it?" I asked impatiently, feeling the stress take the better of me.

"You are here out of your own wishes, correct?" Erik asked me, looking down, dreadfully worried.

"Yes," I replied shortly.

"I told you that you could leave me whenever you wanted, correct?" Well, no... but now that you put it this way... With the brooding man looked to me with curious eyes, and I felt like I was being examined once more under an x-ray.

"Yes," I replied once more.

"You love your Erik, do you not?"

"Yes, Erik... why are we going through this again?" I asked, looking to him annoyed that he wouldn't tell me what was going on.

"See, Daroga? Is it so inevitable that I would not be loved? She's here of her own accord..." He spoke like I wasn't there, like I was a pet. I grimaced at him and it seemed to give off the wrong idea to the other man.

"What makes me think you're not forcing her to say these things? She looks pained, Erik." He demanded coldly.

"She saved your skin! Both of your skins because she loves me! She came to me!" He hissed at the other man, letting my hands go.

He brooded for a second, indifferent to Erik's fierce range, and simply looked to me with his dark, deep-set eyes. "Back off, Erik," He demanded for a change. I think those words were the coldest I've ever heard. "Let me speak to her alone, where you cannot influence her." He pressed briskly, and looked away from me and to Erik who was very much so taller than him. It was a strange "partnership".

I looked to Erik who lightened his expression to something vague and unnameable. He didn't trust me...he thought I would leave him after all this time. Erik, without any other word, swiftly pivoted simply on his foot and walked out as if he was utterly sure of himself, yet betrayed by his eyes that we could no longer see. As soon as Erik was completely away I looked to the Persian and blinked a few times waiting for him to say something.

"Is it true what he says, miss?" He asked conversationally and very quietly. "I can get you out of this if you would like."

I considered it for the slightest second. I would give anything to be relieved from this horrible pain that I had from having Erik leave me again, to see someone that could make me forget, but even Raoul wasn't capable of that healing.

"I need to stay here... You see, Erik's very sick and I need to help him as much as I can... it would be very wrong for me to leave him now." I said in a business-like fashion, feeling like I was dealing out a few things.

"You don't need to... Miss Daae, if you ever need to leave I will be here. Mr. Chagny would very much like to see you."

"Raoul...?" I breathed, keeping the same whisper as he mentioned his name. I stiffened my back, my eyes were becoming wider, "Is he alright?"

"He's not doing so well, I'm very sorry to say." He shook his head, "He's been asking for you ever since he woke up last night. I've been trying very hard to keep the press away, and it seems to be working for a while, but I cannot keep them off long. They're like sharks, you see..." He sighed.

I felt my heart become hurt drastically, torn in the most horrible ways. "I need to see him again," I whispered softly, feeling tears come to my eyes. "I love him as well, you see... I don't want to hurt Erik more than I already have."

"Miss Daae-"

"You can call me Christine, please," I interrupted.

"Very well, Christine, it should not matter right now. If you wish to see Mr. Chagny then I might be able to get you to him while holding Erik off." He explained nonchalantly.

"He would be very angry..." I whispered, feeling myself go blank. "I don't know..."

"He must see reason, then." The Persian pressed even further.

"When could I go?" I asked, looking to him, remembering my statement about always making Erik very mad... I never cared until his rage

"Within the week." He promised sincerely and I nodded and smiled a little.

"Thank you-"

"You can call me Nadir," He nodded.

"Nadir, then... thank you very much."

"Very well, Erik," Nadir said loudly probably already knowing that he was listening intently, therefore we spoke very softly in hope he doesn't overhear. I don't know if he did or not, for he didn't show it when he walked back into the room, looking at me directly I shrunk away, clasping my arms across my chest.

"I will still be keeping an eye on you, Erik..." Nadir hinted coldly, looking to him who didn't even care to look back, though he glared while looking at me, I think. I held onto the cushion of the couch tensely, but gave the appearance that I wasn't tense at all. It was like he could see right through me... read me like a book.

"Erik?" Nadir asked again. I had to pull my hair over my shoulder to block his direct gaze.

"Yes, Nadir, now leave." He demanded.

"You can't keep her here all this time, Erik, she has a school to attend and people who miss her," Nadir went on despite Erik's murderous words.

"I will keep what is mine..." He hissed, "For she loves me and would not leave even after I gave her away," He replied hotly, but even more full-heartedly. I clearly had no say in this debate, so sat back once Erik tore his gaze off of me. "Now leave before I kick you out of my home personally."

He looked to Erik in disbelief and pivoted on his foot and left, still not losing his dignity in the slightest. He was the only person I ever seen act to Erik so indifferently along with the threats and angry words that seemed to always plague the poor man who is acclaimed "friends" with him. I guess there was more of an explanation at hand, but I didn't bother to ask.

"You won't leave your Erik... right?" He wasn't sure, of course. I had to lie, though, I had to be sure that I can persuade him personally before betraying him. He can't be all worked up in his condition.

"No, I told you this." I replied begrudgingly, lying was always something I could easily do with Erik for he almost believed every word I ever said for it was I who said it. "I'm not going to leave." This was a horrible lie, for when he finds out... he'll be so angry and then he could have an attack... which is much worse than right now. I changed my mind directly, and looked down to my hands.

"Very well," He replied, for it seemed he wasn't exactly buying at the same time, either. It was silence between us both, and seeming like a kicked puppy, he stalked to the chair across from where I sat, and looked at me with something once more unreadable in his eyes. I opened my mouth several times before actually speaking.

"I.. I was lying..." I whispered so softly I was surprised that he reacted. "I don't want to hurt you again and again... He said that Raoul has been calling for me ever since he woke up and isn't doing so well and told me he could take me to him if I wanted..." I whispered, and leaned my head further down feeling like I was about to be slapped

He was silent, and I looked up, expecting a harsh outburst instantly, but it was a cross between disbelief and restraint.

"Please say something," I replied, furrowing my brow, looking up.

"You wish to see him, do you not?" He questioned shortly. I nodded slowly. "I trust you this time, Christine, to return to me."

I nodded again, "I will," I said sincerely.

"Do not lie to me again." He stated coming closer to me, and kneeling down, taking my hands into his once more. "Will you promise to be truthful to me?"

"As long as you will be the same to me, Erik."

It took him a second before he answered, "To some extent, Christine, you shouldn't want to hear it."

"But if it's the truth then it might as well be heard. You hide your face... that's dishonest enough." I said slowly. "Besides, you wouldn't want to hear my truth, either."

He took it in, still clasping onto my hands. "I will try," He promised, nodding, taking his mask up to reveal his lips, and pressed them against both of my hands and pulled away, leaving the plain golden ring that I had before on my left hand.

"Don't think much upon it, Christine, but this is just a promise... That you will return..."

I looked to the ring and then to him again, "Yes, Erik."


	29. Rolling Time

**I don't really have much to say now but that I would dearly like more reviews...Am I losing you just because she admitted her love...? Ha ha... That sucks. Well, I hope you're still there for I just concocted several ways of continuing this story and everything seems to be perfectly able to fit in. Maybe it's just a popular time for vacation, I dunno. I don't want to have a reference for every chapter and how many times you people review, for I know it kind of gets dry everytime for I don't review that much myself... I still love you all and I hope you enjoy this sort of bridge that I put together until the next chapter when more events come up.**

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Chapter 29:  
Rolling Time_

I left the next day to the house that I recently spent my days at, baring Erik's ring that I lost and he retrieved. I made the promise, of course, I didn't want to leave him for it seemed it was almost impossible now. Even if I did make it far enough that he would be convinced I didn't love him anymore, I would hurt enough that I would draw myself back to him, and convince him once more. Something would bring me back by a driving force no matter what the status is. He seemed to already know that. I didn't have complete free reign, of course, but he didn't come with me when I was driven to the house I recently spent a few days at before being dragged away again.

It wasn't welcoming this time. It was like it was mocking me, the weather becoming the cold bitter temperature that this place endures when the middle of fall sweeps over like a reminder that summer was through with. Rain was pouring down and through the tinted window, the bright and free house was like a glare in my vision.

I had to do this. I just couldn't bring myself to concoct enough words to tell him that I'd rather spend my days with the man who just recently tried to kill him and now crippled him so that he's restricted to a bed.

I was greeted by his brother with a solemn and rather confused look on his face. He didn't say hello or give me any sort of friendly welcome or gesture, he stared with a dull and blank look on his face.

"You're here for Raoul," He said slowly. I nodded and he gestured up the stairs. I crossed my arms to hide the chill and discomfort, looking back to the driver in the black car. I took in a deep breath and walked up the stairs to his room where there was his sister stood. His sister was very handsome to begin with, but not the most kindred of souls, she glared at me, staying a good foot taller than I.

"Your sweetheart is here," She spat, looking back to the bed, where I couldn't see him just yet for the nurse was standing over him.

"Christine!" I heard a voice that was a very pained cry, tearing my heart out of my chest.

"Yes, I'm here, Raoul," I whispered walking to the seat being offered to me spitefully.

"I thought he would not let you go... to see me... unless I'm dead. Am I dead?" He asked, sounding like a little boy with a drastically weakened sweet voice. I felt tears prick my eyes.

"No, Raoul, he let me come..." I whispered, my hand coming to his head and through his hair, brushing it back. "This was all my fault, Raoul..."

"No!" He began, reaching up and took my arm that brushed back his hair. "No... this is not your fault, nothing is your fault. This is a nightmare... a nightmare! When I'm better, we must leave...we _must_... go to New York or somewhere, we'll live in Maine for the rest of our lives, and escape this and live together... and Christine, I want to be with you... he can't do this to me... he can't..." He coughed, "take you away..." He was crying now, reaching out to me blindly and I came closer to him.

I was crying very much so right now, feeling tears freely fall at my childhood friend crying for me now, and I felt so small, as small as he. I wanted to help him... When I looked out the window to the waiting driver outside in the black car. It wouldn't be very easy. My heart was breaking in half, one going one way and the second in another, also shattering into pieces along the way.

"He needs me, Raoul," I sighed, through the tears.

"You _wear_ his _ring_!" He spat through another chasm of coughs, "He has you in some sort of... trance... this isn't right! You're _not_ his!" He was like a young boy compared to Erik and rebelling.

"Raoul, no..." I sniffled, "You wouldn't understand... I don't know if I can see you again, Raoul, this is what I came to tell you. He is very ill, and I fear he may not pull through if he doesn't have someone to help."

"He deserves to go to Hell!" He exclaimed beside himself, very cruelly. "He's a monster! _I_ was dying because of him... he tried to _kill _me! I could have fought him-" I cut him off as he went through the painstaking details and then his attempt to be the hero.

I shook my head and wiped the tears away. "No, Raoul... I'm sorry to say but even in his weakest state, you won't be able to fight him, and don't try again to kill yourself trying, I daresay you fought making your wounds worse." I noted, looking at the nasty red scars on the base of his neck. I furrowed my brow and looked even closer, seeing even more damage on his perfect skin, purple marks that were even higher on his throat. I choked a gasp at his wounds, feeling more tears come to my eyes. My God... what else could Erik have done to him?

He lost control... or he was planning this for a very long time which was most likely the case. How could he be so cruel? He was jealous... and I could see why. Raoul was remarkably handsome and my best friend, and someone who I freely went to and reminisced for hours, kissing him, and giving him caresses that I would never have dared to give Erik... I knew the facts and I wasn't afraid to know them, either.

Erik was handsome in his own way, honestly... he was very much so a respectable gentleman despite his terrible disfigurement. I dare to admit that he is attractive in his own, less physical way. Not because he's rich, not because he has power... but he treats a lady kindly, almost like Raoul... and I respect him just as much for that. What made me terrified of even being near him? Looking down to Raoul, I knew why I couldn't fall for someone who murders... Part of me will _always_ remain loyal to Raoul for this reason and for a few more.

I breathed in deeply after a few moments of thinking. "I can't leave him," was all I said and all I could think of saying.

"You can't go back to him..."

"That's exactly what he will say if I don't come back. Raoul, he's much stronger than you currently."

"You just said he was ill!"

"And you're very much so injured!" I sighed, and bent down to kiss his forehead lovingly, "I love you, Raoul-to the moon and back. You know that. I can't stand this arguing... Erik needs me right now, and I came here because you called for me... not to debate. I must go, you see..."

"Stay here!" He cried, reaching out for something to hold onto as I stood up. I shook my head, trying hard not to cry. He finally saw that I was meaning this, that I was sincere and he sighed. "When he's dead, come back to me... as soon as he's done something wrong to you, if he hurts you in _any_ way-"

"Erik would never hurt me," I replied earnestly, "If anything, he never wants to hurt me."

"But he has so much_... I hate seeing you broken_... He's tearing to to shreds. More so than you already were. You're not in your right mind! He must be tricking you..."

"I_ don't _think so," I glared. I'm not being proved wrong here... Anything but being proven wrong. Erik's a brilliant actor, but not that brilliant that he would put himself through all this agony for a little game of obsession. It's not like he woke up one day and told himself "hey, I think I need a good obsession for the next few years or so." _That_ would be... psycho. Gross.

"Maybe I'll see you again, Raoul," I kissed his head again, but he slipped in by pulling his lips to mine briefly before I pulled away.

"I love you, Christine," He said hopefully, holding onto my hand.

I looked at his hand, his warm, caring hand entwined with mine, a sensation that I've spent my whole life feeling, and felt a hole form in my heart. I tried to let go but he didn't he held on tightly as if holding on for his life, and I moved away, not wanting to feel the pain of leaving anymore, looking to the still-waiting driver outside.

"_Please_ stay..." He begged as I went out the door. "Just one night..."

"I can't..." I said and walked out.

I was crying the rest of the ride back to Erik's mansion, and once we were on the long road just off the highway, I tried hard to wipe the tears away and recover so as to not have Erik question.

The driver unlocked the door for me and I stepped inside. "Erik!" I called out, seeing no signs of life anywhere in the foyer, and I heard no answer. I walked into the living room and still saw no signs of him. "Erik!" I called out even louder once more and received no movement whatsoever. I called out his name several more times before panic took over.

This was a big house but he never even used the rest of it besides where I normally am. I walked into the music room to find it darkened and just as useless as the rest of the places I checked. And finally, into the library to find him casually sitting there, looking at me listlessly, frightening the heck out of me.

"I called your name but you didn't answer!" I exclaimed through the excitement of finding him simply sitting there. "Why didn't you answer?" I asked angrily. "I thought you were gone or something..."

"A simple experiment, my dear, is all." He answered as if it was the most simple thing in the world. I furrowed my brow.

"A cruel experiment, don't you think?" I spat hotly.

"It does not matter," He said unemotionally, though he began to move like a stone awakening from a long lifeless sleep, for if you see a man sitting there, a mask covering his lips and not moving at all you would begin to think it strange and awkward, would you not? Talking to a statue... "What does matter is that you are back," He muttered, "And you look like you caught a cold..."

"No... it's nothing. I was just..." Crying... but I couldn't say that. What would he begin to think if I told him that much? If I told him I was sick, it would take forever to convince him I wasn't, though... I knew that already. "Upset a little, you see... I was, uh, kind of mad and upset over something you shouldn't worry about. Don't even _begin_ to worry about.... I'm _fine." _I replied. It was one of the few times he didn't buy it.

"Your eyes are reddened, my dear." He noted. How could I even begin to think I'd get past this, anyway?

"I was crying... I'm going to my room." I said quickly and stalked off quickly without another moment's thought. I threw myself onto my bed and began another lonely time in this cage of mine that I once thought of as grand, as beautiful and astounding, but it was terrible. I wish to be with Erik, as I told him, but how would he take it if I told him I wouldn't like to live here? It's so dark and brooding and _him _but I do not like that side of him for it scares me like every other person.

He was at my door, I knew, I heard him breathing through the perturbing silence, debating with himself whether to knock or not.

"Christine-" I heard him start and exhale sharply, "Don't hide away from me... I want to be near you as much as I can... let me in?" He asked sadly.

"You said you hated to see me cry..." I sniffed.

"I want to help as much as I can..._please?_" He asked imploringly.

"You _can't _help." I muttered coldly. "I'll get over it... just..." I sniffed again. He came in anyway. I ponder on why he even bothers to ask He sat, as graceful as ever, at the foot of my bed and looked to me, and I looked away, not wanting to see his hurt eyes. "Why do you even ask to come in when you just go ahead and come in anyway...? Honestly..."

"I apologize," He softly replied, and grabbed hold of my left hand and looked down to the ring, and brought brushed his thumb over it. I looked as he did so, expecting to see the usual ring on his long finger as well, but did not.

"Why do you have a torture chamber, Erik?" I asked all of a sudden. It was just another thought I had... "You said you wanted to be normal and normal people... don't have that... Or even know about one."

"The world is cruel," He began acidly, "I don't _enjoy _killing people, but it's in my own self defense, dear... surely you must understand why..."

"That wouldn't be first on my mind for self defense, but okay," I muttered dryly, and looked to him, "Will you not kill again, then? For me?"

"I'll try."

"Promise me, then!" I said more intensely.

"Christine-"

"Promise," I pressed further, furrowing my brow, gripping his hand tightly.

"For you... I promise," He sighed, his shoulders rising than falling, and I watched every crucial movement he made, for I found it interesting that he portrayed what he was even thinking through his motives and gestures.

"Good," I breathed out, looking back down to his hand and played it between my fingers.

"I love you, Christine," He whispered in my ear... almost seductive.

"I love you, Erik," I muttered, still looking down to our hands.

"Will you sing for me?" He asked sounding very childlike still, almost convincing me with his voice.

"Not right now," I replied, "I'm kind of tired."

"It is getting late, isn't it?" He asked, and got up, but I was still holding his hand, looking at it as if it was the one speaking. I didn't let go, and he looked questioningly to me. It was positively the most oddest look I think he ever pulled off around me and I had to restrain a laugh.

"Will you sing to me?" I asked, pulling him closer. "I want to forget if not for a moment." I explained, and he sat at the edge of my bed as I leaned back into the pillow, he brought the sheets up to my chin, and looked down to me, and began to sing for me a lullaby, almost similar to the piece I played for him earlier. My hand was still holding his, and I pulled him closer as long as I remained conscious with his voice like a drug, so that he was practically laying next to me on the bed. He seemed uncomfortable but at the same time utterly content, his hand making its way through my hair once more. It was pleasant, not comfortable, but I fell asleep despite, for he was happy and it was all I could ever ask for is to see him happy for once.

The next few days were uneventful, both of us enjoying the other's company. He didn't show any signs of becoming ill once again, so there was a sense of beautiful contentment around the entire house which was a first. Not once did I forget about Raoul, though, he never escaped my mind. I longed to find out if he was recovering any better than he was three days ago, but I didn't dare to bring it up.

I asked if I would ever be able to perform again, and Erik said that I would be called if it was necessary, but only gave a hopeful wish for me to sing for him, for he was the one to grant me perfection. I didn't take it so harshly, for it was true and I owed him a few things still. I also asked if he thought he was recovering and he only shrugged simply.

The topic of cars even came up during one of our lengthy conversations, and it was excitable, but I didn't want him to get me something that big for I never was so thoroughly excited by large gifts. I knew Erik could afford it, but it just made me uncomfortable for some reason.

"I would like one," I shrugged, "But you don't have to get me one... I could work for it or... something like normal teenagers."

He gave an exasperated gesture, surprised, I suppose, "If you do not wish it, then never mind. It would just be something small... nothing too 'not normal' as you think it." He shrugged. It was another big step for him, to grant me even more freedom than ever, but I guess it was more of an understanding thing. It was odd, for he was technically the kidnapper here giving permission for his hostage to go about free but how dare I even think of it like this, when I want his company. Never mind... I should decide to not think in detail about these things anymore.

"It's a pride thing," I noted simply, bringing him out of his confusion.

"I suppose," He replied quietly. He should know...

We went out for walks at night, as we used to, but this time more intimate, sharing anecdotes, him actually giving me details on his past, the most interesting sort, of when he traveled the world and more unimaginable sorts of things, some funny, others not so much.

I told him what I could tell him about middle school and high school, and being in classes and such.

"Whoever doesn't have to suffer through those years are rather lucky... especially middle school. The worst three years of my life so far." I scoffed, wrapping my jacket closer around me, and shivered from the next breeze that overcame. Winter was quickly approaching, I knew, as leaves swirled around us, taken up by the wind. "Just beginning to know... things, and I was possibly the _most_ awkward girl in most of the periods except for band and chorus, subjects I could have gone on and on about while making other people almost become green with envy. I was the only one in the music theory class to have a tutor at home... middle school was odd." I laughed to myself. I knew he was listening, for he asked me the question, so he simply nodded along with it, not able to compare. He probably never even knew stumbling over feet in gym class. "I also hated gym," I noted once more, rolling my eyes, "I was hit in the head with a basketball about three times in one class because I hated basketball and refused to do it..."

He coughed a hidden laugh, as if visualizing me falling over as well.

"I never had a boyfriend, though... my friend once clarified that no one was good enough for me for that's what I always made it seem... therefore, I was spitefully alone at the wretched eighth grade dance."

"That must have been _terrible_," He mused melodramatically.

"It was at the time!" I exclaimed. "If I ever met any of my friends again from back then they'd probably never have guessed where I am now," I mused myself.

"In Hell?" He asked, sounding more serious then I was intending for this matter to be. He must have taken all this all too much to heart.

"No, no..." I shook my head. "You know what? Forget it. I never brought it up. I don't enjoy remembering just as much as you. Let's change the topic."

I admit, looking back at all of our conversations, that none of them went smoothly and had their own quirky turns as one of us would take it too harshly and end the talk right then. It wasn't as nice as it was sharing things with Raoul... I swallowed that thought whole, trying to cover that thought with a blanket and pushed to the back of my mind though it never seemed to completely disappear as much as I wished it would.

Days turned into weeks.

I knew that Erik would ask for my hand soon... He never knew that he would be getting recovered so quickly, though he had a few small attacks that he only lost a little memory of the last few moments before losing consciousness. I believe, as days went by, he only became more and more anxious and moody and sure of losing me. Surely it must be a trait, being so unsure and insecure of himself that I might just go off in a poof of smoke. The poor man must have a heart attack every time I said goodnight to him and rolled over on the bed. He once told me that he thought he was in a dream, and I didn't have a reply to that, only shifted awkwardly.

One day, when Erik was entirely sure of himself, we went out to the city...

And in all the terrible things that I've been through these past months, nothing could have prepared me for what I faced in the most innocent of times.


	30. A Mistake

**Okay, this may just be my last update for a while because band camp starts up tomorrow and i'll be out in the hot sun marching around playin' my flute and it's going to be miserable. First of all, because there will be _fingerprints_ *gasps loudly and things crash all over* on my flute because of the hot and sweatiness and then there's gonna be this annoying lyre on my arm all day and it's going to hurt... At least the people are awesome... that's band for you. Anyway, enough about my rant, I want to hear yours because this wasn't the greatest chapter I've written I think... i kind of did it hurriedly while in the car for ten hours driving home and then until 12 last night to read it over.**

Lemme hear what you gotta say...

**Love to you all for I don't know when I'll be able to post again...**

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Chapter 30:  
A Mistake_

I was glad to have worn my heavy jacket for the chill soon turned to downright freezing as the night went on. Erik graciously lent me a scarf for he saw that my cheeks were beginning to flush from the chilliness of the town near the harbor. Last time I was here was when I was with Raoul eating at the small French cafe near the harbor when I conveniently escaped the confinement of the mansion only to find him dragging me back again out of jealousy and anger because I didn't listen to him. We passed that cafe, in fact, on our stroll about the cute little old city that I've grown to adore.

The busyness of the holidays kept the shoppers a good distance from the odd couple that passed them. People were more interested in having a efficient way of getting their loved ones a present rather than waste a few minutes staring at the masked man. It did not matter to me, of course, for it was the worst thing in the world to be stared at uncomfortably.

Strange how there was holiday decor all around in all of the shop windows and Erik did never seem to bring the subject up as we walked along no matter how many times he had to pause for me to simply look at the things and then walk on to the next window, dazzled by the warmth it brought back into my heart at the thought of my father. No more emptiness and not much pain, but good memories when we would have a big party with the neighborhood on Christmas Eve and have a bonfire at the edge of the forest and in the morning I would wake up to find bunches of brilliant presents underneath our horribly decorated Christmas tree in the small living room. At night, Raoul came over sometimes if his parents would let him with his brother, to switch gifts... mine would always be so much less than his and the more I thought about it always made me feel guilty no matter how many times he said not to worry about it.

I didn't dare bring _that_ story up with Erik and it was the only way I could think of to bring up the holiday subject, so I suffered silently, hoping he'd already guessed.

I saw a hot chocolate stand along the way and once I saw it, I looked back to Erik with big, wide eyes hoping he'd immediately get the hint. It took a while.

"Could I get some?" I felt like I was his child or something, my voice high and possibly annoying, clasping my hands together. I haven't had hot chocolate in years, I believe. He looked to me, then to the stand, nodded, and produced two dollars from his pocket and I skipped away and stepped to the stand, ordering my hot chocolate and smiling gleefully holding the familiar warm drink in my hand. I looked up to Erik and took a sip as he studied me.

"Want a sip?" I asked playfully, knowing he'd reject.

"I'm afraid I'll have to pass," He replied just as surprisingly lightly.

I frowned, "You don't know what you're missing. Have you ever had hot chocolate before?" I asked.

"I'm afraid, my dear, that I'd rather not lift my mask in public," He said in my ear and I gasped an "oh" and nodded in understanding.

"Well, it's really good," I noted as I took another sip of the drink, wiping the chocolate from my mouth. "This stuff is, at least... not the ones that come in little bags. It has to be _real _chocolate, or else it won't be good... my father and I used to melt crumbs of a chocolate bar in warm milk and that's how we made hot chocolate," I smiled to myself as I wandered off into that small memory once more, detailing it to him, "...I made it for Santa all up until I found that there's no such thing when my dad made a bunch of noise getting the keyboard into our small living room when I was eight."

He listened intently but I stopped after a while, wondering to myself if I annoyed him with all of my dozing off into memories like that. I couldn't help it sometimes... Erik seemed to almost remind me of my father, if not a direct comparison with his actual witty personality and light-hearted jokes only created to bring a smile to my face once in a while that I ever so valued.

I walked further along until I noticed that we were nearing the darker, sketchy parts of this city, where the oldest houses and mansions were. A dark, ominous, and bricked house peered down to me.

"The Bryce house," I mumbled while I passed it warily.

He looked down to me curiously. "I took a ghost tour once," I explained, "The most haunted house here... Of course... I don't really believe in ghosts, I mean... Our spirits only go to Hell or heaven, which is what's clarified in the bible... What do you think, Erik?" I asked.

"Ghosts..." He mumbled, looking at the house notably, seeming to muse to himself, "I believe in them." He said, seeming very much so amused.

"What?" I asked, smiling to him.

"It's nothing." He snickered.

It was then that I felt something on my shoulder and began to pull me off, too quickly that I couldn't even bother to scream, and when I did, a hand went over my mouth.

"Hush, Christine... it's me." A familiar voice said into my ear, I bit the hand instinctively anyway just to get him off.

"My God..." I whispered, eying the shadow that stood in front of me in the dark alley. It was Raoul, surprisingly enough and he was very much better. "_Raoul_..." I whispered, and immediately was pulled into his embrace quickly and then began to pull me off through the alley. I pulled back, not knowing what exactly to think.

"What are you doing? Come on... you have to come with me... I can get you out of this still." He whispered only loud enough so I could hear it.

"I can't—Raoul!" I muttered, putting my hand over my mouth.

"Not time to talk, I can get you to my car..."

"Raoul!" I called again, pulling back on his grasp and that was when he finally looked back to me, disbelief coloring his face handsomely, his jaw set, eyes wide and startled.

"Right now we can't debate, Christine, we have to run before he catches up."

"You don't get it!" I threw my hand out of his grasp which was much easier than getting out of Erik's, but he caught hold of my other hand and pulled me forth with all his strength, and I wasn't so strong to hold him back this time, so I had to walk with it, leaning back.

Out of nowhere, Raoul had let go, and fell to the ground, so quickly that I couldn't blink, and I felt myself being pulled the other way. It was Erik, naturally, who had knocked Raoul to the cold stone and disgusting floor of the alley, curled up in pain, but then somehow got back up, and ran unbalanced back toward us, my heart thudding.

"Raoul!" I called back out again, wanting desperately to explain but Erik only pulled me more harshly that it hurt extremely. I heard him curse to me, through his breath, frighteningly angry that I began to cry, knowing I couldn't get him out of it on a split second.

It was even more astonishing that Raoul had caught up with him. "Let her go, you monster!" He called out, grabbing my other wrist, pulling me away so that he would have a good grasp at Erik, who swiftly turned around and grabbed the hand that held a small knife in it.

"Raoul, no!" I cried over and over again, trying to grab him and get him away, but he was in too much of an adrenaline rush that it hardly did anything. It was all too quickly that they were fighting, Erik winning and no matter what words I said to the both of them, they wouldn't listen.

It was Erik who faltered, and fell to the ground with a delicate _thud_ and I screamed, though he still had the strength to keep the knife from him. I swooped in quickly, and grabbed the knife in the wrong place, my vision blurred by tears and confusion, only feeling a slight pain in my hand. That thing was sharp. Well, duh... At least I somehow got it out of my hand, feeling utterly ridiculous staring at my bleeding hand and the knife that had it coming to begin with.

They both stared at me, as if just finally realizing I was screaming about the blood coming from my hand too quickly. At least it wasn't Erik... He threw Raoul off of him, once more landing on the ground, and grabbed my not-bleeding hand and dragged me off toward the car. I stupidly stared at my hand, feeling very sick to my stomach for I forgot how much I hated the sight of blood. He didn't care. He basically carried me halfway because of my lack of speed and efficiency. I had no way to rebel, to hit him because of my spinning vision.

He went into the backseat and searched as I sat up front, threw me some sort of cloth without another word.

"Put it on your hand," I heard through the curses and muttering he said once in a while hearing my name, and I only sighed, trying to keep back the bile rising in my throat, breathing heavily, just noticing the stinging pain when I pressed the cloth over my hand.

"How could I ever have trusted you?" He said, his fists clenching the steering wheel murderously.

"I didn't know he was going to be here!" I cried out angrily. He ignored me, and kept his eyes glued to the road. His anger frightened me... what was he going to do now that he's not going to believe me again after all we've been through? After I told him I wanted to stay... It hurt that he didn't believe me, that he actually meant what he said about him sleeping this entire time... that it's just a dream. I expected him to think he just woken up from that dream. I went on trying to convince him but he ignored me and it was useless, so I went back to tending to my hand. The stinging becoming unbearable. What will Raoul think now? I cried silently for my hand because the car didn't seem to move fast enough though he was probably speeding down the highway, and that I couldn't explain to Raoul or Erik... Make some sort of unlikely truce. Having two men killing each other over me is no way to put me at any sort of peace at mind, and made it all the more uncomfortable to admit love to either of them when all they want to do is fight and hardly understand each other.

Erik carried me into the house, grumbling to himself still as he moved, and I hardly understood any of it. There was some sort of falter in his walking, which made it seem like he was limping, but when I asked him what was wrong, he didn't answer.

He placed me without any sort of care onto the couch and limped off to another room that I didn't see, still staring at my hand and unable to tear my gaze off of it as the blood seeped through the thick cloth, and I began to panic, my heart never ceasing to race.

He came back quickly with a small leather bag and knelt by me, grabbing my hand carefully, and gently unwrapped the cloth without another word. He looked at the large gash, I noticed his hands were shaking with a hardly-controlled anger, then to me who probably was as pale as a ghost.

"Look away," He ordered flatly and I did so gladly, still picturing my bloody hand. I felt one long-fingered and freezing hand hold it up, shaking, and the other unsteadily wiping the blood off my hand gently with something wet and then suddenly, it stung even more harshly. I cried out because of the pain that came through my hand like fire burning it. I couldn't help but look down to it to see the fizzy stuff in the wound.

"It's cleaning it out, Christine," He answered briskly. And I shook my head, shutting my eyes tightly, biting my lip and leaning away.

I moaned until I felt another sort of tight cloth come over my hand diagonally and I looked at it, then to Erik, who gathered his things and swiftly walked away, glaring back to me, restraining an untold madness.

He came back after I waited for him to after who knows how long for there is no such thing as a clock in this damned place to begin with.

"Why did you run?" He asked demandingly as soon as he walked in, slamming the door behind with that seemed to shake the entire house. I shriveled up my feet.

"He pulled me along, I didn't want to go!" I said directly, shivering either because of the loss of blood or because he was frightening me again.

"I trusted you with what you say... I _trusted_ you!" There was no such thing as gentleness or beauty in that horrible flat voice. "I should have learned long ago not to do such a thing..." He shook his head, laughing seemingly. "You take the nearest chance and run for it, now that I am better, you can just leave whenever."

"No! I wasn't planning on running, he was just there..." I shook my head wildly, finding myself backed up entirely into the couch, sinking deeply into the cushions. "Please... Just believe me, Erik."

"How can I?"

"He would have stabbed you if it wasn't for me getting it out of his hand. When you fell I tried to get him off of you, don't you realize...?"

"I'm not going to believe another one of your deceitful schemes, Christine," He was so close to me. "How can I believe you when you are floundering right now?"

"Because you're scaring me again..." I whispered for his mask was still right there. "And now that you're listening somewhat, I believe you're limping." I blinked at him, putting a hand to his shoulder and moving it back away from me, and it seemed to have worked, for he remained still, moving him like he was some sort of frozen stick-like doll. I backed out of the cushions of the couch, and he looked to my hand and then to me slowly, kneeling down, as if just admitting to doing a bad deed to his scolding mother, but still not losing the tense coldness he held in his emotional eyes.

"It's nothing you need to worry about," He barked suddenly, though still kneeling down before me.

"If I wanted to run, I wouldn't have kept your ring on my finger all this time..." He looked to my left hand which just happened to be the bleeding one, wrapped in all of the cloth now clean. He gently touched my hand, and moved the ring off of my finger to look at it, take his shirt, and polish it off, then put it back on just as gently as before.

"Your boy never scares you, he never hurts you..." He said as if in some sort of question. I didn't know how to answer that so I simply stared blankly, unsure of how to solve this. It turns out I didn't have to.

He moved upward, and took my entire body effortlessly into his arms all of a sudden which seemed to be the new great thing to do for me, for he hasn't done this when I was awake usually. It must cause him enormous joy just doing that, touching me in a way that I was helpless which is what he seems to muse over constantly... utter control.

"Get dressed," He ordered, still standing there as if he was there naturally.

"Um, pardon?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"It's very late, and you must sleep now. Get dressed." He continued firmly. I seemed to pale of all color at the awkward turn this was coming into. I waited for him to move or do something. "Must I really spell it out for you or are you a big girl now? Does your boy have to spell things out for you? I can be just like him you know...God forbid the prince charming swooping into save you, but I can treat you as a child, if you'd like. I thought you were over it, but if you insist-" The bitter sarcasm in his voice hurt, and I glared at him just as angrily, awkwardly getting my clothes together, and going into the bathroom, slamming the door shut, changing into a long-sleeved nightgown, feeling a few tears rolling down my cheek.

Would it be like this forever, then? Just because he thought I was going to run away again and leave him just because he was almost healed? I walked out of the door, gripping the handle if I had to slam it on his face to show my annoyance. He was sitting casually on my bed, looking to me with unreadable and far-off eyes. He made a gesture for me to come over there, and I unsteadily did so, not seeing the point of this entire facade.

He wiped the leftover tears from my face and sat me, like his personal doll, onto his lap. "Come now, don't be upset..." He whispered warmly in my ear, and my ears weren't deceived. I could sense the strangeness to his tone. I shifted uncomfortably, looking back to his mask, but he moved me even tighter into his embrace, and I still tried to shift gradually, not finding any sort of strength when his voice is lulling me like so. He scooped me up with one arm and placed me onto the bed, bringing the untidy covers to my chin and I looked to him with a concerned brow as he sat on the bed and combed his fingers through my hair.

"You're mine," He whispered acidly getting up from his seat.

"Erik-" I began, and he placed a finger onto my lips and I blinked up to him, confusedly.

"Just remember that." He replied and walked out.

I didn't sleep at all that night... I wondered about Erik's health and if I had something to do with it. He was so very easily breakable, if something like that ever occurs again, he might very easily double over.  
It was then that I knew something had to change. Maybe he needs a more usual life some sort of other thing running through his veins other than morphine and music. If I could just get him to eat regularly, maybe things would be much better.


	31. Decisions

**I have decided that I cannot possibly continue this story any longer. I'm sorry, very much so to have taken this as an unexpected push forward but I have found myself in the undeniable place that I actually have no sort of energy or emotion to put forth to this story for school is going to start and I am very much so busy starting now. I will have an epilogue posted some time. And when I have the time (possibly after marching band season) I am going to have some sort of... I don't know what to call it, actually... I am planning on writing this story from Erik's point of view for there is really a whole other side there that is kind of blinded and I'd think it very interesting to get into his mind here. **

**I'd like to also take the time I have now to thank each and every one of you that have reviewed. I would have never finished this story without you and I would have never updated every other day without you pressing me forth and I really love you all for giving me the hope that I could write my ultimate phanfiction piece that really put my mind in different directions and with certain prospects on life that I needed to be touched upon. For more insight things on this story, I'll have my profile updated with additional things that have inspired me to write this and such as music and themes. **

**I'm sorry to disappoint you on the ending it here. I know there's a lot more I could have done but I was really wanting to put this forth and my mind is kind of... dead. I said I'd like to finish it before school starts and now I just need one more chapter and I'm done, so this was a success for me in some ways.**

I love you all and please review,  
~The Phantom's Flutist~

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_Chapter 31:  
Decisions  
_

I awoke to find him standing in the doorway of my room, and I immediately coiled up, leaning on my arms, simply staring at him staring at me. It was a long moment of silence, simply trying to find words to put together, and things to say, and what to _do_ but I couldn't think of anything strong or something very believable.

"What does it take to convince you, Erik?" I asked through the silence, the stare only existing as a bid of good morning for his brooding presence in my doorway was harsh enough to accept no kind words at the moment. "I love you very much, Erik... If it weren't for you I don't know where I would be mentally or physically, I don't know what it would have taken to awaken me from all sorts of horrible things taking over my mind, and you repay my adoration with this disbelief and coldness and cruelness to my best friend. He has done you no harm."

He stood silently, and I began to wonder if he was even breathing at all. I stared sincerely at him, for the first time ever feeling a head over him. I drew the covers down and sat on the side of the bed, only my cold feet hanging over onto the even more freezing floor.

"It's strange, really..." He began thoughtfully, "That I would return your affection with the same way that you returned mine, and then you ponder on why I would do so. I only learned my cruelty from the one who showed it to me."

My mouth froze into an "oh", startled that I could hardly move, for he was very much correct. I didn't know what to say...

"Don't be so startled, darling."

"I'm not," I spat back, furrowing my brow tensely, not bothering to move any more, looking to my hand that was hardly able to move since it was all bandaged up. "I was only learning..." I whispered, cradling my hurting hand in my other one. "I still am learning for I hardly know you, but yet I do very much. Will you forgive me as I have forgiven you those many times?" I bowed my head low. "Will you believe me when I say with certain finality that I intend on staying with you as long as I can _stand_ it?" I said a little more coldly, glaring back up to Erik who happened to be standing _right_ there once more, and I swallowed down the shock, staring up to him.

"...I-I..." He began swallowing hard, his eyes locked entirely with mine, "am not sure," He finished, seeming deeply troubled.

"Trust me, Erik..." I whispered, coming closer to him, meeting him almost at the same level, looking innocently into his eyes. "Trust me just as I now trust you to never leave me again." I went on, "I know you never was able to trust someone before... But I _love_ you, I will never leave you falling just as you've always been there for me."

"Say it again," He said softly, his breathing very uneven. I raised an eyebrow.

"Say what again?" I asked.

"You know... that... that emphasized part... Erik wants to hear it again. Perhaps twice more... or once..."

He was his childish self again, begging once more, but not on his knees or on the floor or grabbing hold of me, he was actually sitting up straight, so this time I wasn't reluctant to give him what he wanted without displaying a few tears for his self-loathing and pitifulness.

"I love you, Erik," I repeated, smiling slightly.

"_Again_," he whispered, pulling me closer to his chest so my body was almost entirely pressed against his.

"_I love you,_" I breathed feeling my heart beginning to thud faster as he pulled me to him, so close, and pressed his lips lightly on mine, though just enough passion that I paused for a second, looking down his mask, and leaned in closer and went in for just one more kiss that turned out to take me by complete surprise, landing my entire body onto the opposite side of the bed though his lips never parted from mine, his hands around my head, pulling me so that I could not move, strong enough that I couldn't break his hold. His hands slipped down my waist, and chills raised wherever they wandered, my breathing becoming very labored but quick, little by little I could only fill up my lung to retain my fluttering heart, my rosy red cheeks, and a damp back of the neck. He pulled away to get air and then went in greedily, my hands coming to his hair possessively, running my fingers through the thin strands, soft as a baby's hair.

It didn't even last long though it seemed like I was floating for about an hour. He pulled away very much instantly, his eyes wide and he was hardly able to stand up on the side of the bed, hunching his back, his hand risen to touch his thin lips and then slowly, and unevenly work their way down. I looked up with the same wide-eyed expression, and he swiftly turned away, not knowing what to say. I think he was crying, again... he was crying because I heard ragged breaths and a wet exhale and inhale... he was sniffling. What could possibly be the matter?

I turned my head to the side on the bed to see his hunched-over figure away from me, and I couldn't move or so anything, just kind of... astounded that I just let him be on top of me like that, letting him touch where Raoul rarely did, it felt like... cheating. It felt like I just upset something inside of me that I should have never. My heart seemed frozen now, lifeless and dim and confused. Did I enjoy it...? Am I not ashamed to say yes? It was just like Raoul doing it... or maybe it doesn't even matter who did it, it was the fact that any other woman would enjoy it.

I felt sick but I couldn't move.

"Erik's sorry, Christine.... Erik never meant to hurt you again, he should have never been so greedy without asking first... He'll never do it again." He whimpered apologetically, once more sounding very small.

It took me a while to comply with this apology, stretching my arms out to the sides of the bed, staring to the ceiling, no longer wanting to cry or feel my heart break or watch him crumble before me again and again.

"It's fine, Erik," I replied blankly, my brows furrowing. Maybe... Just maybe I loved Erik in the way I would have loved my father... No, that couldn't be... it is love... I just don't know what kind of love. I blushed to myself.

"No, it's not..." He shook his head. I grunted and rose to place my hands on his shoulders and help him up from the pathetic crumble once more. He _really_ needs to stop that or else _I_ might very well go insane for the many mistakes he claims to make.

"I-" He began, shaking his head repeatedly.

"I understand," I lied for I had nothing better to say. How could a single-minded human even understand Erik, anyway?

"You couldn't..." He whispered, holding his chest, as if it would fall apart if he were to take those arms off.

I blinked a few times, coming to level with him, at my knees and looking at him straight in the eyes if I couldn't look at him through that god-forsaken mask of his. "I don't understand _all_ of it... but I understand that I actually love you... and Erik, I'll never leave you... I'll be near you as long as you want me near you."

"You really mean it?" His little boy voice was irking me. I was reluctant. The reluctance was horrible of me, for it left me hanging, my jaw open to say something.

"If you would be willing to act on this trust... to let me leave when I have necessary things to fulfill in the outside world... if I absolutely promise to return... will you give me privacy as to not follow all the time and let me have my freedom?" I asked slowly, measuring it out on my tongue as it rolled over it.

It took him time as well... It wasn't something he was used to, it wasn't something that was often, either. Out of the many stories he's told me, all of them have to do with the bare trust he keeps on people, on promises that were broken and things that he's done as well that betrays this trust... Letting people move about as they would like to wasn't first on his list on things to get used to, I understood.

"Yes," He replied softly, his eyes longing and hopeful, looking at me with a certain adoration this time, for he knew I meant every word. "Yes... if you return one simple thing." Of course he bends it some other way. This was Erik, was it not? He must have his way through thick and thin, even at his weakest stance. It's not surprising.

"What?" I asked dryly.

"No, don't be so cold... I don't know what you'd say to it now... so I might as well... ask you..." He said gently, looking at the ring on my left hand with a certain reverence.

I swallowed in my gut and tried to look at him sincerely, bracing myself on what I would say... how he'd react. It really was, at that moment, waltzing on the edge of a knife. I hated it. I don't want to be married... I don't want to be married... _yet_.

He seemed to have cowered over, for he swallowed his pride whole, almost on the edge of tears, his head bent low, as if expecting to be slapped.

"You will still wear this ring, will you not?" He asked quietly, rubbing his finger over the piece of gold on my finger, for the umpteenth time ever.

I furrowed my brow stupidly for it was a very stupid question... He didn't get it, did he? Poor man... "Yes, of course. Always." I replied simply, holding my shoulders up and then down. I just wanted to get this whole thing settled that I really don't want the finality of marriage at the age of 18. It just didn't seem right and it didn't feel right. I _just_ got out of high school and now I was having a man wanting to spend the rest of my days with me. I didn't know _how_ to tell him, I didn't know _when_ to tell him for this thought just came to me on how _I_ wanted to live me life and not what he wants. He can't control me like his puppet on strings anymore, I won't allow it. And if he can't go with that much, I don't really know how I'd be able to cope with him... I don't know if I could stand being near him. I need time away... you know? I felt cramped in a room with four walls and I couldn't breathe, locked up and secured... and I had nowhere to go.

I know my father wanted me to grow up and enjoy life with a family and accept everything that comes with such a family, but I'm sure he wasn't wanting an early marriage and anything that comes with the whole package of being married before marriage itself.

I watched him get up and steady himself, looking at me intently, once more studying me. It was an odd morning.

"Why don't you freshen up, dear?" He asked slowly, and turned to leave. I wouldn't have that. I needed to assure him somehow that I'd keep up with it. I kissed the cheek of his mask, and walked away, abiding by his words for I was still in the clothing from yesterday.

I went downstairs to find breakfast in the dining room that I've grown all too familiar with, and Erik playing with his fingers nervously, and I looked down to my cereal and fruit without bothering to pick up a spoon.

"So," I began slowly, taking the short word longer than it should be, and trying to start an awkward conversation.

"Is there something more you would like to say?" He asked, unemotionally, looking at me steadily, that same kind of distant glare he gave to me after I accidentally made his mask come off, kind of mixed with a sort of disbelief and curiosity.

"No," I replied surely, though I was lying. There was so much more we still misunderstood about this whole relationship thing. So much more things we need to sort out because this love wasn't free-hearted... it wasn't the type we let everything fall into place because if I let it do that... it wouldn't be natural exactly. I blinked at him, still not going to eat.

"Are you not hungry?" He asked.

"No," I lied. So what was I going to do now? Continue to stare at him the way he was staring at me? No, that doesn't get anywhere.

"Then what's wrong?" He questioned.

"You should eat," I replied slowly but surely, it wasn't what I wanted to cover but whatever. He laughed at me then, and I glowered over it for a second, letting him enjoy himself for a little longer.

"That's certainly not it. I don't eat as much as regular people, and I've been living like this for many years and never have I had any problems... Now tell me what you really want to say."

I glared for another few seconds, and opened my mouth, taking in a deep breath, "That_ is_ what I have to say." I explained coldly.

"Don't get yourself into another little snit over me," He scoffed.

"Erik, it's not funny... You should really eat more often for it doesn't help anything to not do so!" I replied without any sort of emotion, and huffed a deep breath.

He stared at me for another few moments before taking his reply, "Alright, Christine, if it pleases you, I'll eat."

"When?" I added challengingly.

He scoffed another laugh and then patted his fingers on the wood of the table, sounding once more like wood against wood... a strange sound that he could make from his fingers. I guess it's because they're so bony, but they _wouldn't_ be if he ate.

"Maybe later," He said, sounding like a child pushing it to the limit with his mother. I honestly didn't care... I just wanted to get away from what I was thinking earlier in hopes it never happens.

"Promise?"

"Have I ever broken a promise?" He hedged.

I didn't answer to that.

"Oh, Christine, are you always going to play these silly games with me? If you'd like me to be truthful to you, you might as well speak your mind."

"You wouldn't want to hear my mind."

He glowered on it for a second, seeming slapped. "Don't take it that way," I pressed affirmatively, "It's just... I don't think you'd... Erik... Understand that..."

"With all due respect, Christine, will you please say the words your wanting and not make me sit here with agitation?"

I grumbled inwardly, and took in a deep breath. "It's just that I've been thinking about... marriage... and I know you have as well. And I don't... I don't..."

"You don't what?" He asked, sounding calm and collected though I saw his hand shake when he reached for his glass of water.

"I'm not one to think that I should be married right out of high school. I mean it may sound strange to you for I haven't been to a formal school for a while, but I should have just gotten into college and most people... believe it's immoral. My father would have never wanted it for me, and that's what was so relieving to know we weren't actually married before. You understand, right? We can be together and not be married... it's what most couples do, you see..."

He seemed to have taken it in slowly, swallowing it as if sipping through a straw eloquently, thoughtfully. I watched his reaction with fear he'd be angry, and I braced myself for as sudden withdrawal from him if a burst of his violent anger does go on. Fortunately enough, my wait was pointless... I waited in silence as he still took it in, seeming to be aghast.

"Christine-" He began, but cut himself off. See! He wants me to take pity in him now.

"Erik, please..." I huffed angrily.

"Very well." He pressed quietly, hardly a whisper.

"Thank you," I whispered gratefully, "I didn't know if you'd understand or not, you see..."

"I only want for what you wish," How much more tentative could a man be? Erik really wanted me... I've seen over these past months that he'd do anything to assure himself that I loved him, to make himself trust me though I was the one to break it, and now he's letting himself pushing over the only thing that would legally bond us together formally so that if I did lie this entire time, there was no way out of it. I could see him arguing with himself, thinking with himself about how he should trust me. Poor man has no idea. "If you wish to have our marriage later, than it shall be so." He nodded, and I smiled, and walked up from the table and lifted his mask off and kissed his cheek.

That's how it was. That's how it should have always been for I was so selfishly blind enough, and in my childish fears I never knew what true love was. Raoul had it all... Erik had nothing. I couldn't deny him my affection after any of this, not when I knew I could have died if he did, that I would have lost my music along with him... my music is my soul. Erik is part of it. His deformed face is only the price for his brilliance, his excellence that I don't deserve. We had our quarrels and fights and I learned how to pick them out, and shed him of his disgusting anger that was the only part I could have possibly feared.

In my childish fears, I found hope in the midnight darkness that surrounded me, taking my mind away from beauty and landing in selfish chaos. Through these childish yearnings, through fate... _I found black light_.


	32. Epilogue

**I'm so horrible for leaving you guys like that! Ugh... Hate me. I never knew the beginning of the school year could be so unbearingly distracting. I was just about to sit down and write this until i was hit with a buttload of work and things to do and take care of. It's no longer the peaceful summer, I can tell you that. I apologize after I promised you the update after I wrote that note, and then never did so. I hope to be writing again very soon because I just fallen back in love with this story and then writing this epilogue in Erik's point of view just got my head into gear a little. It's probably bad, and I think I'll have to practice it a little more until I can rewrite this entire story (plus more) in his point of view. It'll be exciting.  
Well, tell me your thoughts like you people always do and that's why I love you! I hope you're not too disappointed after all this time, but it's the only thing that made sense to write after all this time...**

Thank you all very much for staying with me this entire time, and you have no idea how much joy this story gave to me in writing. I hope to come back soon if school doesn't override me too much.

**With kind regards,**

**The one and only,**

**~The Phantom's Flutist~**

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_Epilogue:_

_Anything For You_

**1 year later**

**Erik's Point of View**

I loved her. I loved her so much I was ready to die for her at her feet... I was ready to do anything for her love, and she so gracefully gifted it to me like the angel she is. I broke her into a thousand splinters, and when her light burned out, I knew it was time for me to give up as much as she has...

I let her go again.

Yet, I love her still! The way she looked back to me--oh! Her eyes--her eyes held so much that was yet to be said, so many words that she left unspoken to me, and all the more it made me ache inside, down to the core, but if I were to hear those final words, I don't think I'd be able to make it past the moment she turned her back and left.

It feels as though I have no remaining soul the moment I heard her speak no more, and go off with her boy. She looked back, her mouth agape, her hands shaking as they held that boy's. It only took a _year_ to discover she really... didn't need me. It was my decision, please note, all mine... Because through that year we actually were a couple. Yes, a couple! We went all sorts of places together, I took her to every place she wanted to be and more, and she performed on stage just as she told me she wanted. I did everything and more for her, just as I said, but was it only so much as taking an orphan under my wing?  
She missed the boy... she missed him that I could see she was dying inside. She became very ill during the holiday season, the second season spent with me, her chocolate brown hair missed the shine, and she no longer could hold herself up during rehearsal on stage. She was dying... because of me... The doctor forbade her to sing because of her illness, she no longer could perform again. It was as if God was the one to vote against this the entire time.

It was like caging a little bird, telling it to sing, and once it finished, it would have been squeezed by the crushing force of a hand. A larger hand that holds a moving force over the small bird, for it is the physics and reasoning of the world, is it not? She was so weak, but while she was weak she still gifted me with kisses like the sweet girl she was. Sometimes on her own accord, others because I had to simply ask for it like the greedy creature I am.

I finally saw the reasoning she was pleading for all those months ago when she begged for me to not kill her lovely little boy, to not take her back to me. All I've done is pity the affection out of her... out of what little was left and used it against her.

It would take a lot for her to come back... she wouldn't come back. I know she won't. Christine is like that, you see, when she feels something uncomfortable she tends to go away from it and never look back to it, yet she somehow holds onto the memory or person with a cautious tension. Just like her father whom she always referred to for anything during those past two years. It's like he's still alive to her almost, yet she was there watching him die. She thinks on it... perhaps she'll think of me sometimes. I could hope that what she felt was actual love, or I could hope she never comes back so I could die in peace.

For the past few weeks, I've been attached to my music room, writing the final composition until I remove my hands from this piano for good. Just sitting here creates the aura of her presence behind me, her eyes watching my every move, enthralled by a single movement on the piano. My eyes shut, and I leaned back, pretending that she was there to look into my eyes one last time, those big, brown eyes of hers that looked like she was always interested in something, sometimes judgmental or skeptical.

It was a moan that stirred up Ayesha, the last lady in my life right now, from her sleep, coming to sprawl out her limbs and lay next to the bench.

"You and I, my beautiful girl," I muttered, letting my arm hang down to pet the fragile thing. She was quite possibly pleased that Christine was gone... for some odd reason she always found my other woman very annoying, and I had no idea why. Christine, evidently, didn't like cats anyway.

My heart swelled just thinking about the next memory that flooded my mind...

I thought to myself... at least I got to touch her... touch such an angel as that! I kissed her... I wrapped my arms around her, and shared the very thought that I could very well be with her as long as I lived. She did the same for me... oh, she did... kiss me plenty of times of her own free will, because she's a wonderful girl... she's a very wonderful girl despite whatever she thinks of herself.

_Oh, Christine_... what happened?

"_Erik_," The voice was rather evident... too evident... I shook my head, scolding myself for thinking of such things. I tried another note on the piano, but then my own hand couldn't hold itself up without shaking violently. I couldn't do this one last thing without distracting myself... how terrible...

"Erik," My name was more urgently said in her voice. I shook again... more like trembled, I suppose, for it was very close, and _very_ real. Yes, there are some times when I wished I wasn't so mentally unstable. Moments like now when I can't depict reality between my own fantasies or fanatical beliefs. Christine seemed to be haunting me.

I jumped when a hand reached my shoulder when I didn't respond to the voices of which I thought were in my head, where they belonged, but... no... this was definitely real. I had to restrain myself from leaping up weakly from the bench and turning around and serenading her for returning, but when I saw her face again, her brown eyes, and a teary smile, my foot was grounded back into reality when I thought of my place in her life rather than vice versa.

"I-I..." she began, looking at her left hand, the golden ring that has never left that finger, and I hoped it never would again, ever since I found it falling toward the bottom of the sea, and I had to fetch it out of sheer desperation for her to not have done this on purpose and return it to her later, as a loyal dog would give the owner back the disgusting-looking ball that the owner actually didn't want back. Same ordeal here, I believe.

She played with the gold thing on her finger, and toyed about it with a shaky hand. I could only stay there and watch her debate with herself. Finally, she took the golden ring off of her finger, and shook her head.

"Take it," She whispered brokenly.

"Christine, _no_..." It came out weaker than I intended on it being... in fact I don't believe I even properly placed together the words to sound somewhat understandable.

"Yes," She said, extending her arm out, and looked away as to not see me gathering more tears.

_At least she came back_, part of me reminded myself, _but she's not coming back again, _the other said. It tugged and pulled again at my heart, and I began to wonder why she came back at all. To be so cruel and wave it in my face that I wasn't going to see her again. I was giving her freedom, I reminded myself.

"Take it," She whimpered, forcing it further toward me.

"Keep it," I contradicted, "It's my consent to go with your boy... keep it..."

"I don't want him," She brought on further, coming down to tears in front of me, she knelt, bending her head low as if ashamed. I was terribly confused. What was she trying to say here? Was this some sort of act of defiance toward me? That she could go with hurting both of the men who wanted her and be fine with it? This is far worse than cutting open her hand to save me from a blow with a knife.

"Christine--"

"I can't take this," She breathed in quickly, as if suffering from a terrible attack. I think I could have forgotten everything that suppressed my darker thoughts for this entire month when I flung myself to her side as she was being crushed by an unseen force before my very eyes.

"I can't-" She whispered brokenly, coughing back her sobs, and both of her arms were nestled around her chest as if to keep it from ruining her if not already.

"What is it...?" I beckoned into her ear, "Christine, my child--"

"No," She said violently, jerking out of my grasp to scoot away in order to stand up. It was then that I realized the Daroga was standing in the door, watching as if he was watching an interesting documentary. I swear that man has no feelings sometimes, watching the girl break down just as I have, yet making no motion to help her. The usual annoyance with him always being around fetched my usual instincts. He helped Christine here, I figured, but for what reason? He said nothing, he didn't move, so I didn't waste whatever energy I had left to go after him if he was the one to let me see my angel's face again.

I stared at the ring with abhorrence waiting for it to bite it's way back into the coat pocket where it usually found it's housing until something else would take its place at the appropriate time, but that never happened. I didn't bother to pick it up when Christine was staring at me with those big eyes of hers again, almost with the same expression she had when she saw my face, though not so extreme.

"Where will you go?" I questioned blankly.

"I don't know." She answered with about as much dead emotion as a white wall.

"Why are you here?" I demanded coldly.

"I wanted-" She started, shook her head, the brown curls waving amongst her pale, tired-looking face. "Wanted... to see you again..."

She was lying, I thought to myself instantly. If she wanted to see me again, why didn't she during this entire month? Was it just on a whim that she woke up and wanted to torture Erik one last time before he gives? Christine surely couldn't be that cruel. She could have gone to the opposite edge of the world, saw professional help, and eventually marry her suitor... anything to go against Erik. She could have smiled again. Unless it was _I _who made the mistake again. I rarely make the same mistake twice. That's just one of the many traits about myself that I have, an incredible memory would go along with it.

"Just to see if you changed your mind... If... If you wanted me back again... if-if not... I don't want Raoul, so... I'll be going away, Erik."

I stood in dumbstruck disbelief, looking at her, staring down at myself who was bent down before her, in the assumed position of so many other times after I tried to aid her... now she's asking if I still wanted her? After all this time? Just because I haven't gone after her as I did last time, she thought that I didn't want her!

Ah, well... My answer, you ask?

I didn't know what to say.

"Does he not please you?" I asked through the credulousness of it all. It was like asking a child whether their pet was worth the entertainment or not. I didn't blame him for loving her, of course, and vice versa. It was hard to see them lying on a bed together, kissing and whatnot. He had a perfect, pretty face, and a sculpted everything, and she was just remarkable beyond belief. How could anyone _not_ want Christine? And how could a girl like Christine _not_ want someone like _him_? It was just the way of life. It is I who is the intruder here... but just as every poor kid begs for a Christmas present, I wanted her more than anything in the world. I still want her... but she doesn't want him, which is completely twisted in its own right.

If that boy hurt her... I _will_ kill him many times over. If he possibly turned his back _on_ her than it would be I who saw her own revenge. I don't know what it will take to convince that damned boy that _nobody_ hurts my Christine and lives to tell the tale. Not even one who pledged his love to her about the same time that I had.

"No," She replied slowly, as if asking a question to herself and then answering in the same word. "No," She repeated.

"If he harmed you..." I went on wickedly.

"He meant no harm!" She warned with the same low voice.

"Why do you ask me pointless questions!?" I boomed a little more violently than I originally intended. She stood back like a beaten dog.

"Look, Erik-" She began, sighing a long, broken moan. "Whatever you thought of... about me and Raoul is gone..." She whimpered those last words, and then looked to me full on, "The point is that... I can't leave you. I don't care if you want me or not. I need you. When will you learn this?"

"This can't be true. You missed him so much..."

"I did... but now I know I don't want him. Help me, Erik..." She sobbed, throwing herself against me, her arms wrapping around my neck, her head digging into my chest. I shut my eyes, savoring this moment.

"I don't... I don't believe..." I stuttered, finding the words.

My answer was her sobbing into my chest, her arms wrapped around me now. With a shaking hand, I twined my fingers through her hair and brushed it down, patting her head as I went, and it seemed to calm her for her grip around me loosened. She smelled... so good... She felt so very good against my chest. It seemed like eternity since I've been able to have her in my arms.

It was my fault for ruining her. For not asking her again... shouldn't I have known better? She was the one who wanted to leave after a year... I thought I was the greedy one by at first, not letting her go, until she broke... Until she broke...

_"I'm leaving," She stated, standing at the top of the stairs, looking down to me, her bags were stuffed from what I could see. I stared back at her with disbelief flooding my chest._

_"What?" I asked under my breath,_

_"I said, I'm leaving, Erik. You told me I was free to go whenever I chose to, so if nothing legal binds me to you... then I'm leaving." she said confidently, working her way clumsily down the stairs with the heavy bag on her shoulder. Words were stuck in my throat, and it ached to even think of her meaning what she was doing._

_"You don't mean it," I clarified for her. _

_"I do mean it. I said I will stay as long as I can take it... Erik, I can't take it anymore. I don't _want_ to be stuck here forever with nothing."_think _so." She stated thoughtfully._" _Her voice cracked. "You said you wouldn't control me anymore, and yet you still do."__that way, Erik." She didn't mean it, I told myself over and over again. She was... It was just... one of those phases again, a female thing. Next week she'll be over it and move on, forgetting the entire thing. But this wasn't completely made up. I've seen her turn pale and sickly looking before my very eyes when I didn't take her out places. When we weren't traveling she looked like she would crumble at any moment._so_ good about that, too... She could look at my face and kiss every inch, now it was like I was the monster to her again._so_ much when I witnessed their embrace, though only but a moment when I looked away. He kissed her cheek but she didn't seem so enthused about such, for she was looking at me when she did so, as I was slowly bending over, soon to reach the ground when she shut the door._

"That is a lie!" I accused angrily, stopping her in her tracks by simply intimidating her. I hated doing that ever since I got her back, ever since we were a true couple. Her tired eyes looked up to mine.

"I don't

"You're not going to leave me... Please!" I implored. She couldn't meet my gaze any longer and stared downcast to her hand that carried the bag, turning pink from the force. Her small little hand that held my ring. She kept it on, at least... Maybe she was just... jesting for this little while.

"I am! I'm sick of this! I don't want to be stuck here and not fulfill what I intend on doing! I don't want to be frozen in my life because I've fallen in love

"I didn't know... Christine should tell me these things-" I begged desperately. "I've never had a woman in my life... please... just give me one more chance."

She looked into my eyes which were glassed in tears, threatening to overflow. "Yeah," she began, and huffed a blocked sob, "And after the fifth chance I've given you, then what? Try again? It doesn't work

That was the time I didn't let her leave. She stomped back up to her room and I didn't see her for three days. She was turning into me, I swore it. I let her know that too, telling her that one of me is enough for the world, she only gave me a sour look and hid her disturbed face into a pillow. She couldn't even look at my face anymore... She was

She told me that she still loved me, three days later, but I found it hard to believe.

I sought out her boy who was just as lonely as he used to have been. He survived, though... And somehow I wished that I could just be like him when I let Christine go, but I couldn't endure the pain of love any longer. The poor girl lightened up

Christine is like the muse that never leaves. I can't die when she still wants me. I can't die when she kisses me. I couldn't linger on this earth with love, but now I can't live without it once I've tasted it.

I don't believe married couples go through with this... actually, I don't think any sort of couple goes through this. Christine and I... are different. I've discovered how to be putty in her hands and I've discovered how to mend myself to what she wants.

"Tell me you'll always be here." She whispered into my neck.  
_  
"_I'll never leave you," I replied.

"I love you, Erik."

I shut my eyes, replaying that simple phrase over and over in my head. I needed her as the air I breathe, and once she decides that she doesn't need me, I will die. But... what if that is something I can control? The only thing I can control for I will be able to trust her? She is almost twenty now, after all.

"Christine Daae, marry me."

She was silent for the longest moment. It was hard to listen to nothing but her silent thoughts, her reaction.

"It's not a command," I said quickly, "I'm not forcing you, either. This is your choice."

Silence again. Damn those fickle creatures who plays with mens' hearts for a living who call themselves women! The silence was eating me alive!

"Yes, Erik... If you promise me one thing."

"What is that?" I was cautious of the answer for it could be many things...

"Can we move?"

"Why?" I tilted my head over. Was this the only request? The only restriction to having a living corpse as a husband?

"I _need_ to get away from here." She pleaded, her eyes wide, and searching my mask, then finding the way to my eyes.

"That's acceptable. Where is it you want to go?"

"Anywhere... Everywhere... just... _please_?"

"Will you promise _me_ one thing?"

"What?" She was on her toes as well, waiting for a request from one whose requests are never for the better.

"Don't even think about doing that again." I grimaced.

She laughed lightly, her entire face lighting up in a big uproar of joy, she tore off the mask, and kissed my lips.


End file.
